Chapter 11

( The next day - Mississippi )

The group was loaded up in a van, on their way to Lance’s mother’s house.  Since they were going to be in town for a couple days she had insisted that they all come over for a home cooked meal.  And seeing as they rarely got that being out on the road, they had all jumped at the chance.

The guys show wasn’t until the following night, and the only appearance they’d had scheduled was that morning.  Once that obligation was fulfilled they had headed straight to the Bass home from the radio station.  All looking forward to being around Lance’s family and away from the confining walls that was their hotel.

Though they were all excited, it was rather quiet in the van.  Everyone was lost in their own thoughts.  The guys thoughts all revolving around the home cooked meal they were about to devour.  And Kerrigan’s revolving around the same thing it had been revolving around since the day before on the bus.

She ended up crying herself to sleep in her bunk, only to wake up a couple hours later.  But she never came out of her bunk.  A part of her was humiliated with the way she had acted and the things she had done.   There was no way she could face the guys.  Especially, when she could hear them all in the back room joking around and having a good time.

Kerrigan knew that if she were to walk into that room it would fill with an awkward silence.  And that was something she just couldn’t handle.  So instead she stayed in her bunk for the rest of the evening.  Not coming out until she knew all the guys were fast asleep in their bunks.

She then spent the rest of the night sitting in the kitchen booth just thinking.  Thinking about everything that had happened earlier.  All of Justin’s reactions and the things he had said.  Thinking about everything.  It was like her mind was on auto pilot.  And even though she had spent the whole night going over everything and debating everything with herself.  She wasn’t any closer to a resolution than she had been when she had sat down in the booth.

When the guys got up that morning after they reached the hotel, nothing was said about Kerrigan’s topless episode.  She figured Justin had probably warned them all to keep their mouths shut about it.  Which was all for the best.  She knew if one of the guys brought it up, she would only get further embarrassed.

She was already wishing she could take it all back.  And if Joey were to make some wise crack about it, which she knew he would.  Kerrigan was sure she would die of humiliation.

“That was a really delicious meal, Mrs. Bass.” Kerrigan said as she assisted Mrs. Bass and Lance’s sister Stacy in clearing the table.  All of the guys had wandered off into the other room to watch a game with Lance’s Dad and Stacy’s husband Ford.

“Kerrigan, you know you don’t have to call me Mrs. Bass.  Call me Diane.” she smiled.

Kerrigan nodded.  “Ok.  Well, thank you for the meal, Diane.”

“It was my pleasure sweetheart.” Mrs. Bass patted her on the shoulder as she moved around her to load the dishwasher.

Kerrigan smiled at her appreciatively.  She loved Lance’s Mom.  She reminded her a lot of her Mother and of Justin’s.  There was just something about Southern women and their hospitality.

“So, Justin still dragging you around with him?” Stacy asked, smirking at her.  “I figured you woulda got smart and ditched his butt by now.”

Kerrigan laughed.  “Yeah, well what can I say?  I’ve put up with him this long.  What’s another twenty or thirty years?”

“Girl, you need to get away from them guys.  Get out there and get you a life outside of them.”

“I have a life.” Kerrigan defended.

“I didn’t mean it like that, Kerrigan.  I just meant that you’re almost twenty one and you’re still following Justin and Trace everywhere they go.  That can’t make you happy.”

“Stacy, mind your business.  Who are you to tell Kerrigan what makes her happy or doesn’t.  I’m sure that if Kerrigan was unhappy she would do something about it.”  Mrs. Bass scolded her daughter.

“Mama, I’m not being mean.  Just asking is all.” Stacy said looking to her mom and then turning back to Kerrigan for an answer.

Kerrigan loved Lance’s sister.  She knew she didn’t mean any harm by her questions or statements.  She had known her for as long as she had known Lance.  Granted she hadn’t spent as much time with Stacy as she had Lance but she had spent enough time with her to know that she was not a malicious person.  Far from it.

Stacy was just a sweet girl that cared a lot about people.  And she happened to be pretty good at reading people as well.  Kerrigan couldn’t help but wish that the guys could be half as good at reading people as Stacy was.  But then again it could just be a female intuition thing too.

“I am happy, Stacy.  I have a lot of fun with the guys.  I know it may not make sense, but I fit in with them.  We all get along really well and they’re my family.  I don’t think I’d be happy if I was off somewhere else.  This is my life.  This is what I know.  And it does make me happy.”

Stacy gave her a skeptical look.  She believed Kerrigan was happy with the guys.  She knew she’d probably be miserable stuck somewhere off in college, that just wasn’t the type of girl that Kerrigan was.  But at the same time she could tell that even though she was happy with her current life, she wasn’t as happy as she could be.

“Well, as long as you’re happy.” she smiled.

Kerrigan nodded, and then turned her attention back to Mrs. Bass to help her finish loading the dishwasher.

Once they were done, the girls headed into the other room where all the guys were.  Mrs. Bass sat down in her chair, that the boys knew better than to sit in, Stacy took a seat on her husband’s lap, and Kerrigan sat down on the floor by the sofa, as all the other seats were taken by the guys.

Mrs. Bass sighed and frowned at the boys.  “One of you could get up so that Kerrigan could sit on the sofa.”

All the guys quickly started to get up at her words, but Kerrigan stopped them.  “No, it’s ok.  I don’t mind sitting on the floor.”

“You sure?” Lance asked, knowing if he didn’t his mother would never let him hear the end of it.

“I’m fine Lance.  But thank you.” Kerrigan smiled at him.

Lance nodded at her and settled back into the sofa.

The room was once again quite, everyone watching the game.  But Kerrigan who usually loved to watch basketball just couldn’t get into the game.  Her mind kept drifting off, back to her thoughts from the night before.  And new thoughts that were now racing through her mind after what Stacy had said to her in the kitchen.

Kerrigan knew Stacy was right.  To a degree.

She really needed to get out there and get her own life.  She spent way too much time just following the guys around like a lost puppy, hanging on their every whim.  Sure technically she was Justin’s personal assistant, and she did do a lot of things for him and help him out.  But at the same time she wasn’t so busy that she couldn’t be out doing other things.

It wasn’t always required for her to be at every show.  At every sound check.  It wasn’t required for her to spend her every free moment with him or one of the other guys.  And although she loved all of them, and loved spending time with them, she really did need some time for herself.  To do the things that she enjoyed.  She needed girl time.

Kerrigan’s thoughts then diverted to Cody, after hearing Justin say something about Kobe Bryant.  The names sounded a lot alike and that triggered thoughts of him.

She hadn’t really had much of a chance to talk to him or hang out with him since the day they had gone to Six Flags.  She had seen him around at the venues, and he would always wave to her or stop to say hello.  But he was always so busy trying to get all of the lightening setup for the shows that they never actually got to sit down and speak.

A small smile played on Kerrigan’s face as she thought back to the day she had spent at Six Flags with him.  She’d had a really good time.  They’d road all of the rides, played a ton of games and just had a blast.

Cody seemed to be a really nice guy.  He was funny.  Good looking.  And he saw her for the woman she was.

She’d had her doubts at first.  She wasn’t used to having guys look at her like that, but as JC had so blatantly pointed out one day at sound check, he liked her.  Kerrigan had scoffed when JC had suggested it, but he was quick to point out that the guy was always looking at her.  Smiling as he watched her walk by.  He assured her that he was positive that Cody was interested in her.

Justin of course didn’t seem to thrilled with that idea.  She still hadn’t heard the end of it about coming back to the hotel drunk.  He’d brought it up every day and found some way to rub it in her face that she had been drunk off her ass, and he’d had to take care of her.  He also made it perfectly clear that he didn’t like the fact that Cody had gotten her drunk.  Especially since she was under age.  Which Kerrigan was quick to point out, was hypocritical of him since he’d gotten her drunk on several occasions, even though she was under age.

Justin never said it directly but Kerrigan got the distinct feeling that he didn’t like Cody.  And that he didn’t want her around him.  But then that wasn’t his choice to make.

The more Kerrigan thought about Cody, the more she thought about what JC had said to her.  He liked her.  He really liked her.  Thinking back to all of the times they had spoken, or she had looked over at him, she had caught him several times just watching her.  Staring at her.  She was finally ready to relent and realize he did like her.

And then Stacy’s words came back to her again.  “Girl, you need to get away from them guys.  Get out there and get you a life outside of them.”  Maybe Cody could be a part of that life.  There were possibilities there that she hadn’t really given any thought to before.

And then Kerrigan once again started to think about some of the other things that she had been debating on for a while.  The whole “new her” thing.  Some new clothing.  Possibly a new hair style.  She’d already made the first step and got her navel pierced like she had been thinking about, so maybe it wouldn’t hurt to take the other steps as well.  Maybe then Cody would like her even more.

That was it.  Kerrigan’s mind was made up.  She knew what she was going to do.  The only problem was, that she didn’t know where to start.

Looking around the room, Kerrigan’s eyes glanced over all the guys.  She couldn’t very well go to any of them for help.  They’d surely laugh at her.  Or worse she’d come out looking like some floozy.

Then her eyes settled on Stacy, and Kerrigan smiled.  That was her answer.  She could help her.

Stacy was a girly girl by every meaning of the word.  She knew about hair.  She knew about makeup.  And she knew about clothes.  Stacy would be able to point Kerrigan in the right direction and help her achieve a look that would make her more feminine and not the least bit floozy like.

Stacy was the key to helping Kerrigan become a true woman in every sense of the word.

Only problem was, how in world would she approach her about something like that.  Especially in front of all the guys.  There was no way Kerrigan was going to ask her for her help in front of the guys.  She would just have to wait it out, and try to catch a minute alone with Stacy later, when no one else was around.

Later that evening, after the game had finally ended after going into overtime.  All the guys had again wandered off, out back to the deck.  Where Kerrigan assumed they were having “manly” conversations.

This was her moment.  Her chance to talk to Stacy alone, as she had just excused herself to go into the kitchen and get something to drink.

Kerrigan quickly excused herself as well and followed Stacy into the kitchen.  “Hey, Stace can I talk to you for a sec?”

Stacy turned around and looked at Kerrigan.  “Sure.  What’s up?”

“Well, see I’ve been doing some thinking.  About what you said earlier.”

“You’re gonna ditch Justin?  I wasn’t being serious, Kerr.  I mean don’t like quit on him.  I was only teasing.” Stacy said in a panic, thinking Kerrigan had taken those particular words to heart and was about to make a rash decision.

Kerrigan chuckled at Stacy’s worry.  “No, that’s not what I was thinking about.  I was actually thinking about how you said I need to get out there and get a life of my own.”

Stacy eyed her, not completely sure what she meant by that.  “Ok.  So how do you plan on doing that?”

“Well, I need your help.  See I’ve been thinking of making some changes for a while now, but just never really got around to it.  And seeing as I’m always with the guys and there’s never really any other girls around I didn’t really have anyone to go to for help.”

“What kind of changes?  And what kind of help?” Stacy asked, confused.

“Well, it’s not hard to see I’m a tomboy.  I’m nearly twenty one and I think it’s time I started acting and dressing more like the woman I am, rather than the tomboyish little girl I used to be.”

“Who is he?” Stacy asked, smiling.

“Who is who?” Kerrigan asked, baffled.

“There’s some guy you’re trying to impress.  Who is he?  Is he on the tour?  It’s not one of the guys is it?  You know one of THE guys?”

“Well, there is a guy.  But not one of THE guys.” Kerrigan blushed slightly.  She wasn’t used to having these kinds of conversations.

Stacy smiled.  “Ok, so who is he then?”

“Well, his name is Cody.  He’s one of the crew guys.  He works in lighting.”

“Is he cute?”

Kerrigan’s face lit up.  “Oh my God Stace, he’s gorgeous.  He’s got dark brown hair, with these magnificent chocolate brown eyes.  And one hell of a body to boot.  And his arms.  Oh, Stacy his arms are to die for!”

Stacy’s eyebrows raised.  She’d never in all the time she’d known Kerrigan heard her talk about a guy or anyone in that fashion.  “Well, he definitely sounds interesting.  But what do you need help with?”

“I don’t know any girls.  I mean there are some other girls on the tour, but they’re mostly older and I don’t really have any kind of a real friendship with them.  Not strong enough that I would trust going to them and asking them for help.”

“So you’re asking me for help?”

“Yeah.  I need you to take me shopping.  Take me somewhere to get a hair cut.  Just help me!”

This time Stacy’s face lit up.  “Girl, I would love to.  Do you have anywhere to be tomorrow?”

“No, not really.  The guys got sound check and all that but I don’t HAVE to be there.” Kerrigan shrugged.

“Good.  Here’s what we’ll do then.  I’ll call my hair salon and setup an appointment for you for first thing in the morning.  After we’re done there, I’ll take you shopping.”

“Really?  You’ll help me?” Kerrigan asked, with hopeful eyes.

“Didn’t I just say I would?” Stacy smiled, walking over and rapping her arm around Kerrigan’s shoulders.  “This Cody isn’t going to know what hit him.  After tomorrow you’ll no longer be Kerr the tomboy.  You’ll be Kerrigan the woman.  We’re going to get you womanized.”