Chapter 34

( A few hours later )

“Hello?” Justin answered his cell.

“J, it’s me.” Kerrigan spoke softly into the phone.

“Hey, where ya at?  I thought you was going to be here at five, it’s five thirty.” Justin said looking at his watch.

“I’m not going to be able to make it.”

“What?  Why not?” he questioned.

Kerrigan sighed into the phone as she looked up to her reflection in the mirror on her bathroom wall.  Staring back at her was a huge black eye.  “I’m not feeling so well.” she stated.

“Well, you can just sit around.  You don’t have to do anything.  Just come down and hang with us.” Justin coaxed.  He wanted her there.  She was always at the Challenge events and it wouldn’t be the same without her there.

“I would J, but I can’t.  I’ve been sick since I got home and I’m just really tired and I need to sleep.”

“Ok, well then will you be there tomorrow?” he asked, giving in.  He didn’t want to pressure her if she was really sick, which he assumed she was considering she was pregnant.

“I don’t think so.  I don’t think I’m going to be able to make it at all this weekend.” she said, bracing herself for his reaction.

“WHAT?  WHY?  You’re always at Challenge.  Why don’t you wait and see how you feel in the morning before you make any decisions?  You could feel better tomorrow.”

“Well, Cody’s home and I haven’t seen him in a few weeks.  And we got a lot of stuff to work out with me being pregnant and all so I need to be here.” she lied, holding back her tears.  She knew if she even allowed one tear to slip he would be able to hear it in her voice.  Justin knew her that well.

“He’s home?  What’s he doing back so early?  Does he know you were in Virginia with me?”

“He wanted to come home and surprise me because of the good news.”

“But does he know you were in Virginia?” Justin urged her to answer.

“Yeah, he got back yesterday and I wasn’t here.  He was waiting here when I got home.”

“Shit.” Justin muttered.  That was probably the real reason she wasn’t coming tonight.  Or the real reason behind why she didn’t feel well, they were probably arguing.  “Is everything ok over there?” he asked.

Kerrigan starred at her face.  Her eye had swelled up quickly and immediately became discolored, but there was no way she could tell Justin about that.  He would go insane if she informed him of what had happened.

A part of her wanted to tell him so badly, thinking he would be able to help her.  He would be able to solve her problems and make them go away.  But another part of her knew that he couldn’t do anything.  This was her problem and she was the only person responsible for it.

Besides, she was pregnant and she needed to make that her top priority.  She was determined to make things right with Cody and work through their issues.  Given time she hoped she would be able to cure him of his insecurities regarding Justin and they would all be able to get along, but for now she would do what she needed to do.  She didn’t want to be a single mother.  She didn’t want to be alone.

“Everything’s fine, J.  He’s a little upset that I lied to him, but we talked about it and everything is fine.” she lied, hoping he believed her.

“Are you sure?” he asked.

“J, you know I’d tell you if it wasn’t.  It’s fine.  Don’t worry about me, I can take care of myself.  Just apologize to the guys for me, for flaking out on them but I really need to focus on this right now.  I mean having a baby is a big deal and we do have a lot of things to work out.  Plus, I kinda feel like I owe it to him since I did lie to him for the past few weeks.”

Justin sighed.  “I understand.” he said and he did, even though he didn’t really want to.

“Ok, well I have to go.  I’m gonna lay back down.  The plane ride home really exhausted me for some reason.”

“It’s called being pregnant.” Justin stated.

“Yeah, I’m sure that’s what it is.” Kerrigan said softly.

“Ok, well I guess I’ll talk to you later.” he said.

“Ok, have fun this weekend.  Raise a lot of money for the kids.” she tried to pump him up for the event.  She could tell by the tone of his voice that he was disappointed.

“We will.”

“J, I’m sorry.” Kerrigan apologized.  “I’d be there if I could.”

“I know.  It’s just not going to be the same without you, but I understand.  You’ve got more important things to deal with.  It’s all good.  Just take care of yourself and call me if you need anything.”

“I will.  Love ya, J.  I’ll talk to you soon.” she whispered into the phone guiltily.  Quickly wiping away the single tear that she had finally allowed to slip by.

“Love ya too, Kerr.  Later.” he said, then hanging up.

Kerrigan sat the phone down on the sink after clicking it off and starred at her reflection in the mirror.  Her heart was breaking inside.  When did her life become so complicated?  That’s all she wanted to know.

( Later that evening at the venue )

Justin and Trace lazily walked into the venue with a couple other people.  They spotted Chris, JC and Joey standing off to the side of the room and headed their way after saying a quick goodbye to the people they had been out on their scavenger hunt with.

“Hey you two, having fun?” JC asked as Trace and Justin walked up to them.

“Oh, tons!” Justin said sarcastically.

“Aw, perk up man.  It isn’t that bad!” Joey laughed.

“J’s, just pissed because he didn’t find everything on our list.  Him and Shannon kept getting distracted goofing off!” Trace revealed.

“Well, if you took it seriously.” JC began to scold.

“It’s not supposed to be serious.  It’s supposed to be fun!” Justin defended.

“Well, did you have fun goofing off with Shannon?” Joey asked.

“Yeah.” Justin nodded.

“Well, then why are you pissed then?  You can’t have your cake and eat it too.” JC stated.

Trace laughed.  “This is Justin we’re talking about guys.  He thinks he can, but when reality bites him in the ass, he gets pissed off.”

“Shut up.” Justin said, shoving Trace.  “I’m not pissed off.”

“Coulda fooled me.” Joey snorted.

“Whatever!” Justin grumbled.  He hated it when the guys picked on him.  Where was Lance when you needed him?  Usually he’d divert the attention from himself to Lance, but of course he just had to be in Russia didn’t he?

“Hey, where’s Kerrigan at?” Chris asked.  “I thought she was going to be here today, but I haven‘t seen her around anywhere.”

Justin frowned.  “Well, she was going to be here but I guess Cody came home early from the tour or whatever and they’re gonna try to figure things out this weekend about the baby.”

“The baby?” Chris questioned.  He, nor any of the other guys had yet to have been informed about that minor detail.

“Oh, shit ya’ll don’t know yet.” Justin realized, looking around at Chris and the other guys who were all staring at him questioningly.

“Know what?” Joey asked.

“Um, well Kerrigan’s pregnant.” Justin stated, looking over to Trace who merely shook his head in distaste.  He was still unhappy about that situation.

“Kerrigan’s pregnant?” Chris questioned.  “By Cody?”

“Yeah.” Justin sighed.  “That stupid bastard got her pregnant.  And I’m positive he did it on purpose too.  No one can tell me otherwise.”

“Justin…” JC drew out in warning.

“Don’t Justin me, JC!  It’s the truth, we all know it is.  The guy is like majorly possessive of her and he’s so desperate to hang on to her that he’ll do anything.  This is evidence of that.”

“It could have been an accident.” Joey supplied.  He knew about accidents and unplanned pregnancies all too well.

“It wasn’t.  I assure you of that.” Justin shook his head, refusing to think anything different.

“Well, there’s not much you can do now.” JC sighed.  “It’s a shame though.  She’s so young this is going to change her life completely.”

“I know, that’s the worst part.” Justin said, looking to the floor.

“It’ll all work out, J.  Kerrigan’s got a great support system.  She’s got her family, you, Trace and all of us.  Everything will be ok, so don’t worry about it.” Joey said, trying to be encouraging.

“Yeah, I know.  But still I worry about her.  She’s so young and this is so huge.  It changes everything.”

“Sometimes change it good though.” JC supplied.

“I hope you’re right, C.  I really hope you’re right.” Justin sighed.

Meanwhile, Chris was quiet as Justin’s words sunk in and the other talked.  He couldn’t believe that Kerrigan was pregnant.  This was a horrible turn of events.  Hell, her even being back with Cody after what had happened the night of their last show was bad enough.

When he had gotten that word he was almost furious and very tempted to tell Justin and Trace everything then, but he had restrained himself.  And the fact that Justin had pushed for them to get back together didn’t help matters any either.

And now she was pregnant by him.

Chris didn’t know what to do.  His conscious was really wearing on him.  He knew that Justin and Trace needed to know the truth.  He wanted so badly to tell them.  But he had promised Kerrigan that he wouldn’t.  And things so far seemed to be ok between the two.  He hadn’t heard anything about any fights or anything.

In fact, from everything he had heard, the two were getting along great since they had gotten back together.  But still that couldn’t minimize the guilt and concern that still lingered within Chris.

But he didn’t know what he could do.  If he told Justin and Trace about what had happened the night of their last show, he risked ruining his friendship with Kerrigan.  And at this point he didn’t feel that he really had a reason to tell them.  Or so he tried to convince himself.  Constantly reminding himself that they were getting along great.  That they were no longer fighting.

Finally, Chris made an subconscious agreement with himself.  That if he for any reason thought that something was going on behind the scenes.  That even the slightest thing was out of place or wrong with Kerrigan and Cody‘s relationship.  Then he would go to Justin and tell him.  But not until he was given a reason.

As long as Kerrigan was ok and not in any danger then everything was ok.  He just hoped that he wouldn’t regret his decision later.