Chapter 36

( Thurs. August 15th ~ Orlando, Florida )

Pulling his sun visor down lower on his face, Chris made his way into the grocery store.  He was hoping to go unnoticed.  He was only there to run in and pick up a pie or something to take with him to his Mother’s house.  They were having a big family dinner type reunion thing and he needed to bring something.  And he wasn’t about to cook, so this was his only option.  And he just wanted to get it and get right back out without any commotion.

Grabbing a hand held basket on his way through the door, he made a beeline for the Bakery area.  He’d been to this particular Grocery store several times so he knew exactly where everything was.  That was the bonus in going there.

Once he reached the racks with all the pies, he began looking over everything trying to decide what to get and just how many to get.  A lot of people were going to be there and he knew that his mother and sisters had been slaving away making dinner all day long so he didn’t want to show up with just ONE pie.  But then he’d never been very good at making decisions like this either.  He loved sweets and he wasn’t picky, but his sisters and some of his other family members were.  Hence, the problem.

Chris turned to look around for someone that worked in the department, in hopes of getting some advice on what was good and what wasn’t, but he didn’t see anyone.  Sighing he turned and looked in the other direction and that’s when he spotted a slender girl half way down the isle that couldn’t be mistaken for anyone else.

The pies forgotten, Chris headed off in her direction.  He hadn’t seen Kerrigan in forever.  Since right after they had gotten off of tour.  There was no way he could not go say hi.

Walking up to her, she now had her back to him, a smirk slid across Chris’ face. This opportunity was just too good to pass up.

Sliding his arms around her waist, he leaned in towards her ear.  “Hey sexy mama, what do you say we get out of here and go back to your place.”

Kerrigan shoved loose and spun around ready to smack him, but quickly halted her hand in mid air when she noticed it was Chris.  And he was smirking at her devilishly.

Kerrigan pulled off her sunglasses to get a better look at him. “Chris? Oh my God, CHRIS!” she squealed happily, as she launched herself into his arms, hugging him.

Chris however wasn’t as receptive to her embrace.  He quickly pulled her back, not letting go of her arms as he stared at her.  “What the hell happened to your face?” he questioned, staring at the slight purple bruising below Kerrigan’s eye.

Shit.  She had forgotten about that.  “It’s nothing.” she waved him off, and attempted to put her sunglasses back on, but Chris halted her progress.

“It doesn’t look like nothing.” he argued holding onto her right arm.  It was then that he noticed the slight bruising on her arm as well.  “And what’s this?” he questioned further.

Kerrigan looked down at her arm.  Why had she chosen to wear a tank top when she had visible bruises, she didn’t know.  Perhaps it was because it had become such a  normal thing to her anymore that she didn’t really even consider it when making her clothing choice for the day.

“Chris, calm down.  It’s ok.  I was in a car accident.” she lied.

“A car accident?” he questioned, studying her suspiciously.

“Yeah, a few days ago.  But I’m ok.  Just got banged up a bit.” There was no way she could tell Chris that she had gotten the bruises from yet ANOTHER altercation with Cody.

Justin had called her a couple days earlier to tell her that he was going to be moving into his new place that Friday and wanted to check again to see if there was any way she could fly out.  She of course had told him no, but Cody hadn’t cared about that.  The only thing he seemed to care about was the fact that Kerrigan was still talking to Justin on the telephone.  Which had incited another fight, leaving Kerrigan with a black eye and bruises on her arms.

“A car accident?” Chris repeated.   He didn’t believe her lame excuse for a minute.  A car accident didn’t leave that kind of bruising.

Chris’ heart sunk as it dawned on him, Cody had done this to her.  Cody had hit her.  Again.  He was overwhelmed with guilt and was growing more angry with every second that passed, as he continued to stare at her bruises.

He couldn’t believe that the guy was stupid enough to put his hands on her again.  Or that Kerrigan was even still with the guy for that matter.  And suddenly Chris found himself wondering just how many other times this had happened.  A sinking feeling was growing in the pit of his stomach and he wasn’t sure how much longer he was going to be able to control his emotions.

Kerrigan was like a sister to him.  There wasn’t a thing he wouldn’t do for the girl.  But suddenly the secret he had been burdening himself with for so long had grown too much.  There was no way he could stand by and allow this to continue.  He had to do something.  And he had to do it now.

Kerrigan seemed to be able to read Chris’ thoughts and was quick to jump on the defensive.  “I know what you’re thinking, Christopher and you’re wrong!  So you need to calm down before you make a scene.  You’re in public and you do NOT need that kind of attention.” she tried to reason with him.

Chris reached out and gently grabbed Kerrigan by her arm and began to pull her along with him.  “You’re going to come to my Mom’s with me.” he stated.

Kerrigan stopped dead in her tracks and pulled Chris backwards, refusing to move any further.  “Why am I going to your Mom’s?”

“I’m not letting you go back to him.  Do you honestly think I’m going to let you go back there knowing he did this to you?”

“Chris, I told you.  I was in a car accident.”

“Ok.  So explain to me how you got the specific bruises you have from a car accident, Kerrigan.  Did something pop you in your eye?  Did a piece of metal grab you by your arm?  Do tell.  Please explain to me how you have ALL of this bruising but no actual cuts.  It’s not possible and I don’t believe you for a minute.”

Kerrigan sighed.  “Chris, please don’t.”

“NO!” he shook his head.  “I blew this off one time before, hoping it would never happen again.  I didn’t tell a soul Kerrigan.  I kept your secret, but what good did it do me?  None, that’s what!  Look at you!  It’s obvious he’s been hitting you.  And I will NOT allow you to go back to him!” Chris said firmly.

“Well, Chris you’re not my Father so you can’t control what I do.” Kerrigan spat back defensively.  She didn’t want to fight with him, but he didn’t understand what was going on.  He didn’t understand her reasons for staying.  He just didn’t understand anything.

“If you think I wont throw you over my shoulder and carry your ass out of this store you’ve got another thought coming!” he warned.

“Chris do us both a favor and mind your own business!” Kerrigan snapped and began to walk away but was halted by Chris grabbing her arm.

“Please, don’t go back there Kerrigan.  I’m only looking out for you.  I don’t want to see you hurt anymore.  I love you like you’re my own sister.  Please just come with me to my Mom’s house.  We can call Justin, I’m sure he wouldn’t have a problem with you going back to his place and staying until we can get this all sorted out.”

“You don’t understand, Chris.  I can’t do that.  I have to go back.”

“No, you don’t.   Kerrigan, think about this.  It’s stupid!” he argued.

“Chris, I’m pregnant.  I need Cody.  I can’t just walk away from him.  It’s far more complicated than you think it is.  And I don’t’ expect you to understand but this is just the way it is.”

Chris’ eyes quickly diverted to Kerrigan’s stomach, that fact had completely slipped his mind.  The shirt she was wearing was form fitting so he could easily tell that she was pregnant.  Not that she was showing a great deal but her stomach was no longer flat as he remembered it being.  She now had a slight little poof to it.

“Even more of a reason to go with me.” he said, still staring at her stomach.  He hadn’t seen her since he had found out she was pregnant.  And it only made him even angrier to stand there and look at her, with her slightly swollen stomach and bruises all over her arms and face.

“No, Chris.  It’s more of a reason to stay.  I need Cody.  He’s the father of my baby.  We’re going to be a family.  If I leave him I’ll be alone.  I can’t do this alone.” she pleaded with him.  She needed to make him understand.

Chris’ eyes shot back up to hers.  All he could see in her eyes was pain and fear.  She was scared of being alone.  Scared of being a mother without Cody.  And he couldn’t help but think that, that was a piss pore excuse to endure what she’d obviously been enduring.

“That’s you’re reason for staying?  You don’t want to be alone?  Get real, Kerrigan!  How many friends do you have?  You’ve got Justin and Trace.  ME!  Not to mention all of the other guys!  How the hell could you think for one second that you would be alone?  That’s just insane!  That’s no excuse for what you’re putting yourself through.  No excuse at all!”

“You’re not me!  And you cannot make this decision for me, Chris.  I’m sorry you don’t agree.  And I’m sorry you’re upset, but this is my life!  I get to make my own choices here.  And I’ve made mine.” she paused.  “Look, I gotta go.  I need to get back to the apartment.  It was good seeing you.” she said, leaning in to hug him one last time.

As she walked away Chris called after her.  “Kerrigan, please don’t do this.  Please just come with me.”

She turned and looked at Chris solemnly.  “I love you, Chris and I appreciate your concern.  But I have to do this.  This is my life and my baby’s life and I have to do what’s best for us.  I’ll see ya around.” she waved and then walked off, leaving a stunned Chris in her wake.

( Fri. August 16, 2002 ~ Hollywood, CA )

Trace hung up his phone and then walked around some boxes stacked in the driveway to make his way over to Justin.  A somber expression upon his face.  “Hey, J.  I need to talk to you for a sec.”

“What’s wrong?” Justin asked, noticing the look on Trace’s face.

“Got a call from Chris.  He was up in Orlando from Miami visiting some family or something.  I’m not sure, but he was real upset.  He was going on and on about how he should have said something months ago, but that Kerrigan had begged him not to.  And now he felt horrible about it.”

“What the hell are you talking about Trace?  Chris, feels horrible about what?”  Justin questioned.

“Well, it took me forever but between his ramblings of guilt I finally got it out of him. “

“Got what out of him?” Justin asked, growing annoyed that it was taking Trace so long to get the point.

“Well, I guess he ran into Kerrigan at the grocery store or something.  He said he went there to pick something up for a dinner or something he was going to.”

“Why’s him running into Kerrigan such a big deal?” Justin asked.

“Apparently she had a black eye, and some bruises on her arms.  He said that she told him she was in a car accident….”

Justin cut Trace off.  “Kerrigan was in a car accident?  Is she ok?” he asked frantically.

“No, Justin.  She wasn’t in a car accident.  Cody, did that to her.” Trace said solemnly.

“WHAT?” Justin asked in disbelief.

“Chris, said she tried to deny it was Cody, but finally admitted to it.” Trace said, watching Justin closely.  It was all he could do to restrain himself, but Justin wasn’t good about doing that.  Especially, when it came to Kerrigan.

“She admitted that Cody beat her?” Justin questioned.

“Yeah.  She did.  Chris, tried to get her to go to his Mom’s with him but she wouldn’t.  Said she had to go back to Cody because of the baby.  Said she didn’t want to be alone that she couldn’t do it on her own without him.”

“What the hell is she thinking?” Justin sighed as he began to pace.  He couldn’t believe what he was hearing.

“That’s not all.” Trace said cautiously.

“There’s more?” Justin asked disbelievingly.

“Apparently this isn’t the first time it’s happened.“

“What?“ Justin asked, looking up to meet Trace’s eyes.  He was so shocked by all of this he didn’t know what to think.  How to feel.  Or how to react.  But anger was slowly becoming the best option.

“Well, that’s what Chris was going on about at the beginning of the call.  About feeling guilty.”

“Guilty?” Justin questioned.  He didn’t like the sound of this.

“You know that night at the venue after your guy’s final show.  The night Kerrigan and Cody had that huge blow up about he dare?”

Justin’s stomach sunk.  “Yeah?”

“He hit her then too.  Chris, walked in on it.”

“You mean to tell me that Chris has known about this the whole time?  He knew that Cody had hit Kerrigan before and he didn’t tell us?” Justin asked angrily.

“I guess Kerrigan had begged him not to tell anyone and made him promise not to say anything.  She swore it was a one time thing and that it had never happened before.  But now Chris feels horrible because he didn’t say anything then and he said he was positive that the marks on her arms and her black eye wasn’t from any car accident.  He’s like freaking out about it.”

“He should be!  How could he not say anything?” Justin said, throwing his arms up in the air.

“I don’t know man.  All I do know is that Chris is really worried about her.  He said he tried to get her to leave with him.  That he tried to talk some sense into her but she wouldn’t listen to him.  We gotta do something, J.  We can’t just leave her there to go through this.  She’s obviously not thinking with her head!” Trace exclaimed, his emotions showing through.

“Oh, man.” Justin said, walking over to the steps on the entrance of his house.  He sat down, wringing his hand out and then bringing them up to his face as he sat there absorbing the things he had just been told.  “What the hell are we gonna do?”