Chapter 47

( Beginning of October )

“So how does it feel to know your album is now complete?” Kerrigan asked Justin, as they made their way out of the large building that housed the studio they’d been working in the last couple of days.

They were once again back in Virginia Beach so Justin could do any touch ups that were needed and finalize everything on his album with Pharrell and Chad.  And now that they were finished, all that was left was for the tracks to be mastered and then pressed and shipped out to be sold.  The current release date was slotted to be November 12th, but Justin along with his management team had all agreed to move it up to November 5th instead.

There was so much anticipation about the album that they just wanted to get it out there and see what whether it was going to sink or float.  Although, Kerrigan already knew from the content of the album that it was going to do incredibly well.  And she’d also been checking out some of the fan sites online and there was quite an uproar about the album.  She had no doubt that “Justified” was going to be anything less than “Justified”.  Punt intended.

“Well, it’s not exactly complete until they actually press it, Kerr.” Justin chuckled.  He wasn’t sure who was more excited about the whole thing, Kerrigan or himself.

“You know what I mean.” she shoved him playfully, before climbing into the SUV that was there to pick them up.

“Yeah, I know.  It feels great.  I can’t even describe how it feels, Kerr.  I mean this is like a dream come true for me.”

“Yeah, another one.” she mumbled.

“What was that?” he asked, smirking at her.  He’d heard what she said and he knew she didn’t mean it maliciously.

“You heard me.” she rolled her eyes at him.

“Jealous because your debut album hasn’t hit the stands yet?” he teased.

Kerrigan snorted.  “And it never will either.”

The two drove in silence for a few minutes before Justin finally spoke up.  “So I wonder if Trace is having a good time back in Cali without us?”

“He’s with Becca, I’m sure he’s having a GREAT time.” Kerrigan said, wiggling her eyebrows.

“Do not put those mental pictures in my head.” Justin shook his body as if repulsed by the thought.

“I didn’t put anything in your head.  If you’re thinking that kind of stuff, that’s all you buddy.” she smirked.

“Whatever.” Justin groaned.  “Sooooooo….” he drew out, not really sure of what else to talk about.

Justin had been feeling quite awkward lately.  Ever since his little chat with Chris at Six Flags a few weeks before he’d been thinking more and more about what Chris had said and the decisions he had come to.

It was extremely weird for Justin to be looking at Kerrigan the way he now was.  He found himself studying her all the time.  Watching her every move.  Noticing things about her he’d never noticed before.  Like the way her hips swayed when she walked.  Or the way she crossed her legs when she was sitting down.

Even though he’d been feeling things for her since their kiss, this was the first real amount of time lately that they’d had to spend together.  So he’d never really had the chance to notice those things before.  But he was noticing them now and it was slowly but surely starting to drive him crazy.

There were times when they would be joking around and she would be laughing and he just wanted to reach out and kiss her something awful.  He was haunted by the memories of that one amazing kiss he had shared with her.  And it seemed like no matter how hard he tried to shove those thoughts and memories out of his mind, they stuck there like glue.  Refusing to budge and inch.

This whole pretending not to be in love with her thing wasn’t turning out to be as easy as he had hoped it would.

“So, what?” Kerrigan questioned.

“I dunno.  Just trying to make conversation.” he shrugged.

Kerrigan laughed at his feeble attempt.  She had noticed he’d been acting a little strange lately and was utterly confused as to why.  She wanted to believe it was related to everything that had happened.  That he was just being overly cautious around her, but something told her there was more to it than that.  She just didn’t know what.

“So when do we fly back to Cali?” she asked, picking a topic for conversation since Justin seemed unable to do so.

“Why are you asking me?  You’re supposed to be my personal assistant.  You’re supposed to know these things.”

“I’m testing your knowledge and you said you were trying to make conversation.  So I’m making conversation.”

“Oh.” he paused in thought.  “Well, we’re flying back tomorrow afternoon aren’t we?” he questioned, honestly not entirely sure when they were flying back.  He’d been so consumed with working on the album and all the other “crazy thoughts” that had been running through his mind lately that he hadn’t really paid much attention to when she’d said they were flying back.

Kerrigan smiled at him.  “Correct.  Our flight leaves at 2:30 tomorrow.”

“Ok, good.” Justin nodded, then looked over at her.  “You think you wanna go out with Chad and Pharrell tonight?  They mentioned something earlier about maybe going to a club or something since it was our last night in town.”

Kerrigan shrugged.  “Sure, I guess.  I mean we don’t really have anything else to do.  And they look like they’d be fun to party with.” she smiled.

“Trust me no one parties, like Pharrell.” Justin grinned.

“Well, then this should be interesting.”

( Later that night @ the club )

“Damn, this place is packed!” Kerrigan yelled over to Justin as they were lead through the swarms of people crowded into the club, along with Pharrell and Chad.

“Yeah.  Stay close to me.” Justin yelled back, grabbing Kerrigan by her waist and pulling her close to him.  He didn’t want to take the chance of them getting separated somehow in the crowd.

Kerrigan, meanwhile was somewhat amused by Justin’s behavior.  It wasn’t like this was the first time she’d been out to a busy club with him, or caught up in the hysteria of it either.  So for him to be clinging to her and acting so protective she couldn’t help but be amused.  He hadn’t acted like this before.  Well, with the exception of when she had first gone on the road with him, but that was when she didn’t know anything about these situations.  She was well schooled now so Justin’s behavior was just odd.  But extremely amusing as well.

The group made their way through the club and up to the VIP area and were then seated at a small booth in the corner.  They ordered their drinks for the waitress that has appeared when they sat down and were now drifting off into their normal club banter.

Well, it was normal to Kerrigan.  Every time she went out to a club with any of the guys she would always have to sit off to the side and listen to them go on and on about the various “hot” women in the club and their outfit choices for the evening.  It was at least somewhat comforting to know that that portion of the whole clubbing experience with Justin and his friends hadn’t changed.

Drifting off in her thoughts Kerrigan was looking around the club.  People watching.  There really were a lot of people there that night.  Especially for it being a week day.  But everyone appeared to be having a good time.  Dancing around.  Laughing.  Smiling.  Just watching the strangers having a good time was enough to bring a smile to her face.

Kerrigan however was broke from her daze when Justin nudged her gently on her shoulder to get her attention.  “Are you zoning out on me or something?” he asked.

“Huh?  No, sorry I was just watching the people.” she shrugged.

Justin smiled at her.  “It’s cool, I was just teasing.  But look I’m gonna go over there with Pharrell real quick.  He’s got some people he wants to introduce me to and I didn’t just wanna get up and walk off while you in la la land.”

“Funny.” Kerrigan rolled her eyes at him.  “That’s fine.  I’ll be here.”

“Well, Chad’s staying with you.  But I’ll be back in a few.” he said, before quickly climbing out of the booth and walking off with Pharrell.

Kerrigan looked over at Chad, whom was just smiling at her.  “Does he think I need a baby sitter or something?”

“Nah.” Chad waved her off.  “That dude Pharrell’s introducing J too, well me and him don’t get along so well.  So it’s best I stay here.”

“Oh, I see.” she nodded her understanding.

“So how have you been lately?  We’ve spent the last few days holed up in the studio, I don’t think I ever actually got around to asking how you’ve been.” he smiled.

“I’ve been good.  You know, dealing.” she shrugged.

It was a well known fact to Kerrigan that both Pharrell and Chad had been clued in on all that had happened and gone on with her since the last time they had seen each other.  And all the guys had been extremely careful not to bring it up or mention it while she was around.  Which Kerrigan thought was sweet.  But sometimes they were just entirely too obvious for their own good.

“Well…” Chad paused, rethinking what he had been about to say.  “That’s good.” he finally finished.

Kerrigan merely chuckled at him under her breath.  She couldn’t help but find it amusing.

Granted there really wasn’t anything funny about what had happened, but the way the guys acted was too much for her at times.  She was dealing with it.  And it sometimes annoyed her to no end that they would skirt around the issue.  She was expected to be up front and forward when she was thinking about it and feeling upset about it.  But everyone else was aloud to skirt around it and avoid it.  She really didn’t think that was fair.

But this wasn’t the time or the place to bring that conversation up.  And in all honestly Chad didn’t know any better.  Everything he was going on he had heard from Justin.  He was just being watchful of her feelings, so it really wasn’t his fault.

Sitting back in the booth, Kerrigan quickly finished off her beer, ordering another when the waitress came by again.  She really wished she hadn’t allowed herself to get on that particular train of thought because now it seemed that’s all she could think about.

Thinking about everything that had happened.  Memories of everything Cody had put her through flashing through her mind.  Memories of how stupid she had been.  And that all consuming dread that over took her every time she thought about the upcoming trial.  It was scheduled for November 22nd back in Orlando and Kerrigan really wasn’t looking forward to that at all.

She knew everything that had happened.  Everything that Cody had done to her, it was all going to be brought up in court, in front of God only knew how many people.  And she was going to be forced to relive the whole thing again.  Something she’d rather not do since she had been doing such a good job of pushing all those thoughts behind her and moving on with her life.

But this was something she couldn’t get out of.  And it was something that needed to be done.  Cody needed to pay for what he had done to her.  To their baby.  He was out of his mind and she hated him.  Any love or emotional feelings she’d had for him before, were completely gone now.  The only thing she was left feeling for him was hatred.  And she wanted to see him get what he deserved for doing what he had done.

Finishing off her beer once again, Kerrigan motioned for the waitress to get herself another drink.  Maybe if she consumed enough alcohol her mind would be too fuzzy to think about those things anymore.  At this point she would try anything if only it would make the stupid memories and thoughts go away.