Chapter 7

"You think you got enough shit yet? Jeez!" Justin grumbled as he pushed our shopping cart.

We were at Nordstrom’s at White Flint mall doing some Christmas shopping. As you can guess from my enthusiasm for Halloween, I love holidays and Christmas was no exception. I followed my mom’s tradition and decorated every spare inch of the house that I could get away with and Justin was getting tired of me dragging him from store to store while I picked up even more decorations and presents for everyone I knew.

I tried to appease him. "I’m almost done," I said sweetly while perusing the perfume counter. "I’m trying to remember what kind of perfume Aurora said she liked … I have to get that exact one because normally she only wears those special Egyptian oils, you know?"

"Well, call and ask Jen or something so we can go," he whispered, all nervous. "I think people are starting to notice me."

I rolled my eyes. "No one’s paying any attention to us, Justin," I said exasperatedly. He did that everytime we went out. "You’re just being overly paranoid."

But I was wrong, because just then I noticed three teenage girls staring at us from across the counter. Great. They looked about sixteen and were practically foaming at the mouth at the sight of Justin. All I could do was act normal and hope they wouldn’t approach us, that they would give us some semblance of privacy.

Again, I was wrong.

"Umm … Justin?" one asked, nervously twirling a lock of hair around her finger as she chomped on her gum.

"What?" he asked shortly, obviously not in the mood for talking to fans. Then he whispered to me, "See? I told you!" Then he turned back in their direction. "Sorry, I mean hi. Hi."

"Ohmigod!" They all shrieked, practically in unison and scrambled around the counter to get closer to him. "What’re you doing here in Maryland? Is the whole group here? I can’t believe you’re here? Can we get an autograph and a picture?"

From out of nowhere they whipped out a camera – did they just happen to carry them with them everywhere or what? – and several ‘N Sync CD’s, making me think that they’d been following us for awhile. My suspicions were soon confirmed.

"We’ve, like, been following you forever!" Another one exclaimed as she handed over a Sharpie magic marker and the CD to be signed. "But we couldn’t figure out if it was you because you’re, like, by yourself or whatever."

What the hell was I? Chopped liver?

Justin sighed and just kept signing. "Yeah it’s me, I’m on a mini-vacation here," is all he offered. Though aggressive fans got on his nerves, I’d never seen him seen him act so rudely. In his defense, though, for once I could sort of see why. Sometimes you just don’t want to be bothered and I knew he hated being approached in Maryland even more because no one expected him to be there.

Or so we thought.

"Are you Tara?" The third one finally spoke up, shocking the hell out of me with her questions. "The one from the Challenge for the Children game? I’ve seen your picture on the Internet," she said before I could deny being, well, myself.

Nodding, I shifted around nervously. "Yeah." What else was I supposed to say? But I wasn’t going to offer them any information, that was for sure.

"How do you know her name?" Justin looked ready to flip out after he’d taken two pictures with the trio. "Where do you guys find out that kind of stuff?"

I tried to diffuse the situation before he blew up, which looked like it could be any second. "It’s not a big deal, J, for real. Just finish taking the picture so we can get going, okay?" The girls looked at me with a mixture of jealousy, admiration and hate as I would probably look at, like, Donnie Wahlberg’s girlfriend. They hated me and as always, that made me extremely nervous.

Where was Mike when you needed him? Now I understood why he was so against Justin venturing out alone, especially with me.

Quickly, Justin huffed and puffed his way through two more photos and one autograph before he informed them that he was done. "It was nice meeting y’all, but don’t be following us around, okay? Let me have my privacy."

"Okay!" They all said in unison again, gazing at him adoringly. "Thanks Justin, thank you so much," they kept saying as they backed away, then turned around and ran off, giggling. We were left alone except for the curious glances from other shoppers and the sales people, obviously wondering what all the fuss had been about. Rather than hang around and risk someone else bothering us, I decided it was time to jet.

"Sweetie, I can get Aurora’s perfume later. Let’s just go, okay?" I was scared what he’d do if someone else approached.

He grumbled, "Fine. I told you we should’ve left before…" he continued complaining as we left the store, hauling packages with us until we reached my dad’s truck. Once safely inside, he revved the engine and turned on Master P as loud as he could. Needless to say, he was aggravated so even though I despise Master P, I didn’t say a word. We had a peaceful drive home, holding hands and only talking when I needed to give directions. Justin loves singing or rapping to the radio and I let him unwind by doing that so that hopefully by the time we reached home he’d be back to my sweet golden boy again.

So far, so good. We got home and instead of pulling into the garage, he parked in front of the circular driveway because we planned on going back out to get some food shortly. It wasn’t until we were in the process of unloading the car that I noticed the car parked directly across the street from my house. The car was empty but the street wasn’t deserted. Standing behind the car like we couldn’t see them or something were the three girls from the mall, who had apparently followed us!

Hoping he wouldn’t notice, I tried to hurry him inside. "Sweetie, could you go unlock the door? I’ll get the rest of these; there’s not that much."

He looked at me liked I was crazy. He always did the gentlemanly thing like opening doors for me and carrying packages so what I suggested sounded very weird to him. "What? T, is your brain fried today? I really don’t need this after—" When he suddenly stopped talking I knew that the jig was up. The game was over, so to speak. He’d spotted the girls and all hell was about to break loose. "T?"

"Umm, yeah?"

"Am I seeing things, or are those the same girls who were at the mall standing across the street?"

I hesitated for a few seconds before answering, "Yeah, I think so."

"So they followed us." That was a statement, not a question. It was also a fact, so I couldn’t lie. "After I specifically asked them not to."

"Yeah, looks like it," I replied while digging in my purse for my cell phone. Mike was going to have to start earning his pay and get his butt to my house post haste. He stood beside me fuming and I thought he was going to leave alone it but just when I got the phone out, he suddenly charged towards the gates of my house and manually hit the keypad to have them open.

"Shit," I groaned, running after him and thanking God I was wearing jeans and sneakers. Even still, by the time I got over there he was already yelling.

"Don’t you fucking realize what an invasion of privacy this is? Do you think this is going to make me like you better or something? Huh? Because it’s fucking not. I don’t fucking like any of you and if I ever catch you around here again, I’m calling the cops, you fucking hear me? Huh?"

I was holding onto his one arm to calm him down and desperately trying to dial Mike’s number at the same time. "Justin, chill out, okay? Just ask them not to come back!"

He snorted and shook his head. "Like that’ll fucking work. Losers who follow people around like this won’t listen to a simple suggestion like that, T, trust me."

One of the three girls, all of who were on the verge of hysteria from being screamed at by their teen idol, tried to speak. "W-we d-d-didn’t mean t-t-o m-m-make you mad, J-j-justin," she managed to get out. "W-w-e just w-w-wanted t-t-o t-t-ry to find out why y-y-you where h-h-here," she sobbed.

Finally Mike picked up his phone and I turned away. "Mike’s House of Grits ‘N Gravy," he sang through the phone. All was right in his weird world.

"Mike, you need to get over here right now," I was freaking out and it came through loud and clear over the telephone. All of his joking ceased and security guard Mike was back in effect.

"What happened? Talk to me, I’m turning the car around now," he ordered.

"Justin’s standing here screaming at some fans who saw us out shopping and they followed us to my house and I can’t get him to stop and they’re crying and he’s so mad I’m afraid he might hit somebody!" My heart was pounding so fast that I thought I might have a heart attack and I was terrified because I’d never seen Justin so mad before. Even the few times he’d been that close to being mad -- barring the time regarding the baby --- I’d always been able to calm him down but now he was in another world, still screaming. "Do you hear him, Mike? What do I do?"

"Put him on the phone," he said grimly. "I’ll take care of it, just get him to take the phone."

Close to tears like the fans myself, I said a trembly, "Okay," then turned to Justin. "Justin?" Nothing. He kept yelling at the girls, one of who had developed a backbone and was now screaming back about this being a free country and how they could stand wherever they wanted.

Which really wasn’t helping matters any.

Hitting him in the arm as hard as I could, I shouted, "Justin!" and he finally looked at me. His face was bright red and his eyes were as cold as I’d ever seen.

It scared me. He scared me, so much so that I was shaking,

Thrusting the phone to his ear, I said as forcefully as I could, "It’s Mike. Talk to him now." For a second he stood there in a fog as if deciding whether or not he wanted to or not, but for some reason he went ahead and took my phone.

"What? … Mike, these fucking girls just … you know I really don’t give a good fucking shit about that right now …" He turned and looked me over for the first time and seemed to soften a bit. "No, she’s not looking so great but that’s the whole fucking point, man … you know I’m not trying to do that shit on purpose …" He sighed. "When? … You sure? " He turned and looked at me again, worried this time, "Alright, man. Alright. Yes, yeah, fuck! I said yes. Bye."

He flipped my phone shut and stood there glaring at the girls for another few seconds before he turned to me yet again. "C’mon, T," was all he said as he took my hand and walked me back across the street, We picked up the groceries scattered everywhere and made our way inside, back into the kitchen. As soon as we set everything down onto the counters, I collapsed into one of the chairs at the kitchen table and put my head in my hands. This was all getting to be a bit too much for me.

"Baby, you okay?" He knelt down in front of me, putting his hands on my knees, I had a brief flashback to one night where we were in exactly reverse positions, with me sitting in front of him, trying to comfort him about his overzealous fans. I never imagined, not in a million years, that it would ever be the other way around. "I’m so fucking sorry about this shit! But don’t worry … Mike’s on his way and he’ll take care of it. He knows how to handle situations and shit like this," he told me, now perfectly calm.

But I knew it was all an act for me. He figured if we acted calm then I wouldn’t get upset but I knew him too well. I could still feel the tension in his body and hear the anger in his voice and it didn’t make me relax at all. If anything, it made me feel worse that he wouldn’t just come out and talk to me, but I wasn’t going to start an argument about that then.

I shrugged. "This is just all so strange. I can’t believe they followed us home, to my house! Now they’ll probably put my address up on the Internet or some crazy shit like that and people will drive by all the time. I live alone here, J. This scares me to death because what if some Single White Female chick decides she wants you and figures out where I live and decides to act insane? It could be in the middle of the night and I’d be alone and—" There I went with my rambling again, and again he stopped me before I hyperventilated.

"Shhh," he pulled me to him and cradled me in his arms. "You know I’m not gonna let anything like that happen to you, don’t you, T?" I-"

I couldn’t help but interrupt. He had the best of intentions but he wasn’t, like, Steven Seagal or anything. "I know you’re gonna try but you can’t be with me twenty-four hours a day," I explained again, losing my patience.

"But you could be with me."

I just sighed, At least until I’d had the chance to experience being on the road for week or two, I refused to commit to it. Now, though, it sounded like a very good idea, If I was with him on his tour there was no place safer in the world for me. "But I just have to see it first, can’t you understand that? I’m not gonna make a huge decision like that until I at lease see what it’s like and anyway this isn’t what we need to be talking about right now, Justin. Okay?"

He squeezed me hard and rubbed my hair, trying to relax me and keep a tight rein on his own out of control emotions. "Okay. You just gotta understand that I want you with me all the time, baby. I’d miss you so much if you weren’t there. I’d miss talking to you and kissing you. I’d miss hugging on on you and baby!"

"What" Such a dummy, am I.

"The ass!" His hands slid down to said region and squeezed. "I don’t think I could make it without, t," he said, all serious. Sometimes I really believed him, sick bastard, He talked about my ass so much and so seriously that sometimes that I was jealous of my own body part.

Yes, I know. I’m a loser.

Just then my front door opened and closed and I heard the clack of shoes in the foyer. "Where’s everybody?" It was Sasha, and Justin groaned, then got up to begin putting the few groceries we’s already picked up away.

"In here," I called out faintly, and she appeared shortly after, looking adorable in a big, furry purple sweater and dark jeans with boots.

"Hi honeybunch," she kissed me on the cheek. "Timberfuck, what the hell are you doing, cussing out your loser fans?"

Justin dropped the box of mashed potatoes that he was about to put in the cupboard. "You talked to them? Why the fuck would you talk to them? I can’t believe they’re still out there," he muttered to himself and neither could I. That’s true obsession.

Sash helped herself to an apple and shrugged. "I pulled up and these girls called me over so I went to see if they were lost or something and they told me everything," she shook her like Justin should be ashamed. "Although I did tell them they were wrong for following you guys home and if they gave this address out I would beat the living shit out of them. I even made the one old enough to have a license show it to me."

See why I keep her around? She’s like no one else.

"Thanks," Justin said grudgingly and I could tell it killed him to say it.

"Oh don’t thank me," she said snarkily. "Because I also told them that your shit stinks just as bad if not worse than everyone else’s so they should maybe think about picking another favorite. Maybe Joey."

Justin rolled his eyes and continued putting food away while I laughed my head off, momentarily forgetting that I was being stalked. "Girl, you’re crazy. Did you really do that?"

"Hell yeah I did," she crunched loudly on her apple. "Where the fuck is your bodyguard at anyway? Isn’t he paid to stop things like this from happening? Shit, I’d do better as security than he would. I got them to leave and everything," she boasted.

"Did you really?" I got up to peer out of the front windows and sure enough, they were gone. But they’d be back, I knew that for sure. I could remember being that age and if I had known where my teen idol and his girl were shacked up at, my ass would’ve been practically picketing up and down the street. "They’re gone, Justin!" I confirmed when I returned to the kitchen.

"Prob’ly scared them away with her face," he grumbled underneath his breath and I kicked him. Just then, Mike appeared, totally frantic.

"Where are they? What happened? Are you okay?" We al sat there staring calmly at him like the last hour hadn’t happened.

"Chill out, man," Sasha pulled out a chair for him. "Sit. Breathe."

He rolled his eyes at her. "Where are the fans? Tell me now." That was said in a don’t-fuck-with-me bodyguard voice that worked wonders on us all. We quickly told him everything.

He shook his head, "This is why I don’t like leaving you alone, man," he told Justin who shrugged and stared at the place mat on the table. He’d been so disappointed after he got over his anger about not only being spotted and followed to his ‘oasis’, as he called Maryland, but now Mike was reaming him out. I wanted to go and sit on his lap to hug the hurt away but it wasn’t exactly the appropriate time

"I didn’t think this would happen," he said pitifully. "I thought I might have to sign an autograph or two but fucking being followed never entered my mind! Stupid bitches," he said grumpily, and I reached over to hold his hand, which he grasped tightly. My poor baby.

Mike sighed and ran a hand over his face. "Y’all know what this means, right?"

We shook our heads except for Sasha, who was busily reading the latest edition of W magazine. "What does it mean?" Justin asked.

"It means playtime is over. You two have been living in a fantasy world for the last few months security-wise and that’s all gonna change. No ifs, ands or buts, I let you get away with too much and now we got fans knowing Tara’s address which isn’t cool at all. So I’m calling Randy (Randy was the Head of their security team) and we’re gonna figure out what’s happening next, because there is going to be something happening now that this information is out.

I groaned, closed my eyes and put my head down on the table.

Change.

Everything was changing again, just when I thought we were past all that. Now I was going to have to prepare to be stalked and have Justin freak out on every fan encounter.

I sighed.

Maybe all this change was getting to be a bit too much for me.