“Gay?”

“Yep.”

“He actually brought the guy home to meet you all?”

“Yep.”

“Shit.  That’s one hell of a surprise.”

Trace laughs, and I feel myself smirk a little.  It’s what I expect from him.  He blows everything off, mostly keeps his real emotions to himself because that’s how he deals with shit.  I’ve come to learn that well over the years.  Prison changed him, mostly for the better, but when it comes to his emotions, it changed him for the worse.  It’s why it took him so long to marry his wife, but I guess we all expected that.  “Yeah, and now I’m spending quality time with them this weekend, as a compromise for Abbey.”

“Oh yeah? What are you getting out of it?”

“It’s for Vic.  Abbey said she’d go take a look at that gymnastics camp, if I agreed to do this.”

“You mean you’re not going to get a night of passion out of her?” He gasps.  “Bro, you and I need to spend some time together.  Being around all those women is warping your brain in ways that I don’t like at all.”

“She didn’t say no ...just that she’d think about it.”

“She’s holding out on you, for a reason.  Nothin’s worse than that.  Maybe I can come out for Conner’s birthday after all.  I think you need to see somebody besides your wife and kids for a few days, and hell, I need to see Kristy.  I have no idea what she and your brother are up to.  I hardly talk to her more than once a week these days.  It makes me cringe to think what’s keeping her so preoccupied...”

“This conversation is going to places I have no desire to get to,” I laugh.  “It would be great if you guys could come out though.  I know Abbey would love to see you, Shawna, and Derrick.”

“It would probably just be me.”

His voice has lost its brightness, and I know there’s something he’s not telling me. 

“Why?”

“She’s...she’s visiting her mother.  Derrick’s with her.”

There’s more to it, but I have no clue whether or not I should push the subject.  “All the more reason to come out,” I say, with forced enthusiasm.  

“Yeah.  I might, if work doesn’t keep me too busy.  I’ll let you know though, okay?”

“Sure, man.  Whatever you can do.”

“Great.  Tell Kristy to give me a call if you see her.”

“Will do.”

He hangs up.  

He’s still a work-a-holic, despite the things and people in his life that give him every reason to maintain an equal balance between work and home.  Shawna was different in the beginning about all of that, but we knew she would change her attitude eventually.  When Derrick came along, I think that’s when she started to realize that Trace wasn’t like me.  He wasn’t going to drop work for a kid, for a marriage, even if she was the love of his life.  Over the past year he’s been taking on several major projects at once, and from what I can tell, he’s almost never home. Shawna told Abbey he goes on business trips a lot, barely sees Derrick, and even though he hasn’t mentioned any of it to me, I know its been putting a strain on his marriage.  That probably means Shawna is doing a little more than just visiting her mother.

I feel terrible, because I know she’s the right woman for him.  He’s just to wrapped up in Wall Street to realize what’s happening, that he could lose her if he keeps this up. Hopefully he’ll take my advice, come out here, so I can talk some sense into him before it’s too late.

“Justin!”

Bam bam bam

I sigh and yank my polo over my head.  “I’m coming!”

“You’re already late!”

“It’s the weekend! I’m not late for anything!”

I yank the bathroom door open next to find Abbey standing there, hands on her hips.  Yeah, of course she knows I’m stalling, there’s no way I could get that one past her.  I figured she’d have it in her heart to understand though, given the circumstances.

“Quit stalling.”  She motions me out of the bathroom roughly.

Guess I was wrong.

“It took me twenty minutes to persuade Davey not to leave, while you were up here taking your sweet time getting dressed,” she says from behind me, as I slip into my sneakers.  “Meanwhile, I have half a dozen seven year olds running amuck downstairs, because I stupidly volunteered to be this weekends play group leader, completely forgetting that Bray and Jess were coming. Thankfully Austin is picking them up at the airport for me, and Mason went with him. Our daughter is here of course, but can’t be bothered to give me a hand with anything.  I’m used to that though...spoiled little...”

“Relax would you?” I turn slowly to face her, and hesitate the roll of my eyes I know I’m very capable of performing right now.  “I’m doing what you want me to do.”

“You should want to do it anyway...for Davey.  Excuse me now while I go tear my hair out,” she grumbles, before storming out of the bedroom.

It takes me a minute to follow her. I can’t deny that I’m annoyed with my wife, but I don’t want to let my feelings show.  She’s stressed and venting, like I was last night, and I’ll take her attitude in stride.  I let out a long breath before I walk out of the bedroom and down the stairs.  When I enter the great room I find that Abbey was right about the seven year old circus that’s taken over our house.  They’re doing everything that makes me cringe inside and hate small children...they’re jumping on my expensive furniture and touching shit that I used to keep locked away from Conner up until recently.  He’s learned to respect my stuff, because that’s how I’ve brought him up, but of course these other kids aren’t the same way.  

I’m not a big fan of Abbey’s whole ‘soccer mom’ thing.  Don’t get me wrong, it’s great that she’s so involved in who our kids are friends with, but when she books three activities in the same weekend, it makes life harder on all of us.  Sometimes I wish she’d run all of these things by me before she plans them, but then again, I’d only end up telling her to do whatever she felt like doing.  It’s just how I am.

Given the circumstances of the weekend though, I feel like I could potentially freak out at the wrong person, possibly my wife, and that just won’t do.

That could mean no happy time for a year.  I’d never survive it.

I try to ignore how messed up my house is becoming, so I can focus on finding Davey and getting this quality time shit over with.  I spot Vic as I head through the kitchen.  She’s sitting at the island, clicking the buttons furiously on her cellphone as the flat panel TV blares loudly from its place on the wall.  “Hey.  Seen Davey around?”

She glances up at me quickly and flashes me a small smile.  “Outside waiting in the car.  I think all the screaming was getting to him.”

Something crashes.  I wince.  “Great.  Listen, do me a favor while I’m out would you?”

“Sure thing, Daddi-o,” she giggles.  

“Help out your mother, will you?  She’s a little high strung today, and I don’t want Bray and Jess to think they’ve walked into the pits of hell when they get here.”

“Mom’s so dramatic,” she rolls her eyes and lifts up her phone to focus on it again.  “She’s so focused on being popular with all the mommies she forgets what’s going on in her own life half the time.”

I pull it down away from her face.  “Vic, you know that’s not right to say.  Mom tries hard, and she loves all of us.”

“But Daddy...”

I look over my shoulder to make sure the coast is clear before continuing on.  “Look, just  suck up to mom for the rest of the weekend, and I promise it’ll be worth your while.”

She’s silent for several moments.  I can see the wheels in her head churning as she stares at me, trying to figure out what I’m saying.  “What’s going on?”

I can’t help but smile.

“Is it...” She gasps.  “Daddy! Camp?”

“Shh.”  I laugh and kiss her cheek.  “Your mother would kill me if she knew I told you.  I can’t promise you anything...she said if things work out she’d go down to check out the place with us.”

She barely hears me.  She’s too busy squealing as she runs around the table to throw her arms around me.  I can’t help but hug her back tightly, as I laugh into her.  “You think you can go handle Conner and his friends for a little while, so mom doesn’t pull her hair out?”

She sighs.  “I’ll try.” She pecks me on the cheek.  “I love you Daddy.”

“Behave,” I call after her as she wanders away and starts yelling at Conner to pay attention to her.  

Crisis averted.  Now, onto project number two.  

“Took you long enough.”

I glance over at my brother as I get settled into the drivers seat and yank my seatbelt on.  “Nice to see you too.”

He lets out a miserable groan and I start up the car.  His boyfriend hasn’t shown up for our little outing, either, but I guess it might be better for us to be alone today.  I can’t bring myself to say anything of course, so I just drive, and he stares out the window.  I know this isn’t what Abbey wanted our outing to be like.  She wants us to talk.  I guess we haven’t really done enough of it since he moved to Boston and started his life without our guidance.  I tend to forget that.  Austin is here so I spend a lot of time with him, helping him to become a better business man.  The rest of my time is divided between spending time with my kids, and doting on Abbey.  There just isn’t room for anything else.

I guess that makes me a shitty brother for turning a blind eye to what’s been going on in Davey’s world.  Abbey certainly didn’t.  She’s always telling me some story about his life in Boston, and of course I smile and tell her how great I think it is that he’s out there having a good life...but I never push the subject, ask what we can do to support him a little more.

I should.  It sucks that I’m only realizing this now.

“I overreacted.” I finally tell him, knowing I have to be the one to break the tension.

He’s silent, and it makes me look over at him.  “Davey.”

“How about David?”  He scowls and shoots me an icy glare.  “I’m not eight years old anymore.”

I laugh a little.  “Fine...David.”

“I expected you to react that way.”  He crosses his arms and looks back out the window.  “I didn’t even want to bring him here, but Tim insisted, so I gave in.  It was a mistake.”

“So where is he now?”

“You actually thought I was going to subject him to your shitty attitude again, Justin?  We’re leaving tonight, I just wanted to show Abbey a little respect.  I’m here with you to make her feel better about the situation, that’s all.”

“You just got here, Dave.  Why don’t you give me a chance? I mean, you just sprung this on me and it’s like...I’m supposed to accept it without a second thought?”r32;

“Abbey did.”

“Abbey’s different.”

He laughs at me and shakes his head in anger.  He doesn’t get it, naturally, but I knew he wouldn’t.

 “Why couldn’t you be straight with me from the beginning?  I mean, you two seemed pretty close.  How long has all of this been going on?”

“Does it matter?”

“Well I think it’s messed up that you’ve been keeping something this big a secret from us, so yeah, it does matter.”

He shrugs.  “It’s been a little over a year.  I didn’t think I’d be with him this long...usually I just date around.  I didn’t think...people like me were supposed to settle down with anybody.”

I try not to cringe.  “So this is serious then...with him?”

“It’s certainly not a phase.”  He flashes me a sarcastic grin.  “I love him and he loves me too.  He...he wants to get married.  That’s why I brought him here.”

I feel the little beads of sweat begin to form on my brow, and it takes everything in me not to start freaking out on him, tell him it’s unnatural and not how I raised him to be.  I think about how Abbey would want me to react to this news though, and saying all that to him definitely wouldn’t be her ideal choice.  “Marriage?”

“It’s not exactly unheard of these days...same sex marriage.”

“So are you doing it?”

“I don’t know.  I don’t know what I should do.  I’m fucking confused though, I’ll say that much.”

He needs our support now more than ever, and I’m sure he knows he has Abbey’s completely.  But me...I just don’t know.  I don’t know what to say to him.  I don’t know anything about being with a member of the same sex.  I can’t give him good advice.  In fact, the whole thing is making me want to throw up my eggs and bacon, but I have to be stronger than that.  “Do you...really feel that strongly about...about him?”

“I know I don’t want to be with anybody else.”

I just nod a little, and thank the powers that be when I see the party store up ahead.  I quickly pull in and put the car into park, before finally looking over at my little brother again.  It’s funny, as much as he tries to act like he’s so grown up now, I can still see that spark of innocence in his eyes...that gentleness inside of him that was always his most unique trait.  He needs me more than he has in years, but he won’t admit it.  He’s too scared, and I know my attitude isn’t the only thing that’s intimidating him.  The idea of accepting who he’s become is terrifying him too, even if he tries not to show it.

So I need to man up, and be here for him, like I’ve always been.  I may not agree with this whole thing, but I know that it’s serious, that Abbey was right when she told me ‘Davey likes boys’, and that fact is never going to change.   I have to accept it, because if I don’t, we’ll lose him for good, and I couldn’t live with myself if that happened.  I love him too much, and so does Abbey.  “Why don’t you bring him by tonight,” I finally say.  “I’d like to get to know him.”

His eyes narrow.  “You don’t care.”

“I’m trying my best, Dave.  That’s all I can do until I adjust to this.  I think that should be good enough, don’t you?  One step at a time.”

He throws off his seat belt and starts to get out of the car.  It makes me sigh and slam my head back against the headrest.  I’m sure I’ve failed. I’m sure I’ll go home and my wife will condemn me to a guest bedroom for the rest of my life.

“Justin.”

I look over at him.  “Yeah?”

“Do...” He pauses, looks down at his lap for a few moments before finally looking me in the eyes again.  “Do you...do you really want to get to know Tim?”

“Yeah,” I say, sincerely.  “I’d like that.”

He just smiles, and I know it’s not much...that it’s going to be hard adjusting to this dramatic change in my brothers life, but it’s a start.  

“I guess we’ll stay then.”

“Great.”

We both get out of the car, and I throw an arm around him as we walk up to the store together.  We start making fun of Austin a little bit, joking about how unglued he became the other night, and I’m sure we’ll give him hell about it later tonight.  It’s my brother here with me again, I realize.  The kid I’ve raised, and come to be so proud of.  That’s all that matters too.  We’re family, and that’s the most important thing, no matter what he chooses to do with his life.

I can definitely see some happy time in my future.