eleven: love connection
“So you guys have asked for it, you’ve sent in your questions, and finally, The Cameron Crew is gonna do another round of Let’s Be Honest,” Jeff announced to the city of New York through the airwaves. “Rachel, Nadia, Caleb. Are we ready for this?”
Rachel sighed heavily, because she always, no matter what, ended up receiving some embarrassing and/or sexual question that she didn’t want to answer. “I guess so.”
“Let’s do this,” Nadia returned. It wasn’t her favorite segment, but listeners seemed to like it, so she was game.
“Can we just add a stipulation real quick,” Caleb inserted, as he too, always ended up having to reveal way too much.
“What’s that?”
“If you get a super easy question, you have to answer another one. Because it’s getting to the point where it’s just not fair.”
“There’s nothing unfair about the process,” Jeff laughed. “I ask you whatever question I pull.”
“Yeah, I know. But me and Rachel end up talking about our sex lives and you and Nadia get to talk about what you wanted to be when you were little. It feels like a setup, dude.”
“I’m game if everyone else is.” After the two ladies in the room agreed, he went on to pull their names out of a small box so as to determine the order. “So we’re starting today with… Caleb. Then Nadia, and then Rachel. So I’m last.”
“The last question is always the hardest one.”
“We’ll see,” Jeff teased. “But all right, let’s do this.” He received another box from one of the interns, full of questions from listeners, coworkers, and their fellow co-hosts. “Caleb. If you had to be a race other than your own, what would you want to be?”
“What race would I want to be?”
“If you couldn’t be a white dude, yeah, what would you be.”
“Umm. I dunno, I think I’d wanna be black. Like all the black guys I know, they’re just effortlessly cool. Like I have to try really hard to be as awesome as I am, and I think that would come naturally if I were black. I’d be cool, and funny, and I feel like I’d know how to just have a good time. That’s not offensive, is it?” he looked at Nadia.
“No, stupid,” she laughed. “I mean, I think you have blinders on if you think it’s that easy to be a black man in America, but I’m not gonna begrudge you of your little fantasy.”
“Okay, it’s like seven in the morning. Let’s not get too deep with this.”
“I’m just sayin’,” she held up her hands innocently.
“All right,” Jeff interjected, “so Caleb wants to be black. Nadia, it’s your turn.”
“Get at me, bro.”
“Your question is… How many times have you actually been in love?”
“Crap,” she whispered into her mic.
“Is this a hard question for you?”
“No,” she sighed. “It’s just that that’s my question.”
“Is it?” Rachel laughed.
“Yeah, I was like doing something for the news report and Kristin knocks on my door like, ‘Hey, I need your questions for Let’s Be Honest,’ and I really just scribbled the first things that came to mind.”
“Well that’s the danger of Let’s Be Honest,” Jeff proclaimed. “You might have to answer your own question.”
“Clearly,” she chuckled nervously. “Umm, how many times have I been in love…”
“That is your question.”
“Truthfully… I don’t think I ever have been,” she lied.
“I call BS.”
“Jeff! I’m serious.”
“You’re, what, thirty-one, thirty-two?”
“Thirty-two,” she confirmed, staring at him from over the soundboard. “What are you getting at?”
“I just highly doubt that someone like you “ you’re obviously very attractive, very smart, you’re easy to be around--.”
“Oh Jeff, you don’t know me as well as I thought you did,” she was laughing.
“No, but seriously, Nadia, you are what one would consider a ‘catch.’ And I find it hard to believe that some guy hasn’t swept you off your feet on multiple occasions.”
“Well Caleb attempts to on a weekly basis,” Rachel joked, seeing the tension mounting on Nadia’s face.
“I mean, I don’t know. I think in college there were a couple of flings, but nothing where I could say I was even close to being in love. Then I started working at the hospital, and I was way too busy to think about having a serious relationship. And since I’ve been here on the show, people won’t even talk to me,” she laughed.
“Very funny.”
“No, but… I really can’t think of any meaningful relationship I’ve had where I can decisively say, ‘I was in love with that person.’ I’ve loved people, sure, but in love?” She had conveniently decided to completely discount Alex from her dating history. “I don’t think so.”
“Well there you have it, Nadia Maraj has never been in love.”
“On the other hand,” Caleb began in his usual sarcastic tone, “I do believe that Jeff is in love with you.”
“I was just gonna say…” Rachel agreed. “I’m concerned as to what your wife will say after hearing this segment.”
“Catherine is gonna kill me,” Nadia noted, shaking her head.
Jeff laughed. “No, no, she’ll kill me, but that’s all right. These questions are designed to make everyone feel as awkward as possible, so mission accomplished, huh?”
“So who was next?” Nadia was eager to move on from that conversation.
“I object,” Caleb interceded before they could move on. “I feel like that was too easy of a question.”
“How was it any easier than your question!”
“I had a good answer, at least. You just say ‘I was never in love’ and we move on? I don’t think so.”
She rolled her eyes exaggeratedly, but she was a good sport. “I don’t care, I’ll answer another one.”
“You want to?” Jeff confirmed.
“Why not.”
“All right. Nadia, what were your first impressions of everyone on the show?”
“Ooh. Interesting.” She looked around the room and decided to start with the easiest, which was Rachel. “Rachel, I remember our meeting the clearest, because you just randomly called me before we’d ever even met, and you asked me out to dinner. And I thought, ‘Okay, she’s trying way too hard, she’s obviously a fake bitch.’”
The rest of the room laughed, but Rachel defended herself. “And I was totally just trying to be, like, a welcoming colleague. Like when Kristin said she found a replacement for Allison, the guys were very wary of meeting you, so yes, I called and asked you out, just to get a feel for you, but I promise it was very genuine.”
“No, I know that now!” Nadia chuckled. “And I think I told you at dinner, I was like, ‘This is either a very calculating move on your part, or you’re just really nice.’”
“You did.”
“And so after we had dinner, I quickly fell totally in love with this chick right here. Like, she was very open and honest, and I really, really dug that about her. I honestly strive to be more like her on a daily basis, so.“
“Aww, I love you too, Nadia.”
“So that was Rachel. Umm, Jeff. I remember meeting you with Kristin at, like, a hotel or something. And I just remember thinking, ‘Oh… he’s older than I thought he would be.”
“Okay…” was his only response.
“Not that you’re old! I mean, I guess I thought you were in your twenties or thirties when Kristin first told me about you. And when she said you had two kids, I guess that should have tipped me off, but it didn’t register with me at all. So when I found out you were forty, I was just a little… surprised. And I remember saying to Kristin, ‘Oh wow, he has great hair.’”
Laughing, he replied, “My wife says that to me every morning, too.”
“So that’s what I remember thinking about you,” she grinned. “As for Caleb, umm… I met Caleb last, and I think, I don’t know if he was just put off by my presence or what, but I thought he was kind of mean. Like, I’ll be totally honest, a part of me wondered if maybe he didn’t like black people. I didn’t know! He was just very… succinct when dealing with me. And now that I know him better, I know he’s that way with everyone, but he’s a big teddy bear underneath it all. But at first, I was just like, ‘Oh god, keep me away from him.’”
“You thought I was mean?” Caleb exclaimed in surprise. “I was totally in love with you.”
“You didn’t show it!”
“I was talking to someone the other day,” Jeff began to point out, “and they described Caleb as a contrarian, and I think that is a great description. He just does the opposite of what anyone else is doing or saying in any given social situation.”
“This is true.”
“That’s not true at all,” he countered, thereby proving that exact point. “Also, this game is dumb.”
“You’re the one that insisted on me answering another question.”
“Yeah, but it was supposed to make you uncomfortable. Not me.”
“I like you now, though!”
“I really don’t care. Who’s next.”
“Caleb!”
“Who’s next,” he repeated, ignoring Nadia completely.
“I do believe it’s my turn,” Rachel inserted, a bit relieved that the hardest question had most likely already been pulled for this round.
Jeff pulled out a strip of paper and read the question to himself, chuckling before reading it out loud. “Rachel, which member of the show would you most like to see naked?”
“Are you kidding me!” she shrieked, in disbelief that she was still receiving the most awkward inquisitions.
“That is the question.”
“All right,” she sighed, quickly glancing at everyone in the room. “I think I have to say Nadia.”
“Oh god,” Nadia whispered.
“I mean, Jeff and Caleb, I’m sure you’re both lovely, but over the weekend at Kristin’s parents’ house, we all had to get fitted for our dresses, and I got a peek of what Nadia is working with. Suffice it to say, I wouldn’t mind seeing a little bit more.”
“Oh god,” she said again, laughing.
“I’m just bein’ honest.”
“Clearly, today has been designated as ‘Let’s make Nadia as uncomfortable as possible while being honest.’”
“If you got it, flaunt it, my friend.”
“Please let us get this over with,” she exhaled, sitting back in her chair. “Jeff, what’s your question.”
“My question is, ‘Who do you think is the most selfish person on the show, and why?’”
“Ooh. Ouch,” Rachel commented, looking over to him. “Say Nadia, say Nadia!”
“Shut up, you weirdo!” Nadia frowned at her.
“You better not say me,” Caleb joked, “Every single time we hang out, you magically lose your wallet and I end up paying.”
“It’s not you,” Jeff chuckled. “I’m leaning towards Rachel, honestly.”
“Me?!”
“Yeah.”
“Why on earth would you pick me?”
“Only because you’ve been dating your boyfriend for, what, five years now? And you refuse to marry this guy. It just doesn’t make sense to me.”
“You also say it doesn’t make sense that I pay all the bills and let him do whatever he pleases. Even though that’s not true. How can I be selfish?”
“It doesn’t make sense,” he laughed. “In fact, it’s also selfish of you to take all the bills for yourself, so there we go.”
“I hate this game,” she whimpered jokingly. “Like really, can we play it like once a year?”
“I don’t disagree there.”
“I honestly didn’t mind this round so much,” Caleb was happy to admit. “Good job, everyone.”
“See what I mean? Contrary.”
“Isn’t it time to go to commercial yet?” Rachel sighed. “This is way too much, I need a moment.”
“Not quite,” Jeff was staring at his computer screen and saw one particular call that he deemed necessary to take. “Nadia, the game isn’t over for you yet.”
“Say what now?”
“We have a caller with a question for you. And he has requested to be on the voice disguiser? This is… John; good morning, sir.”
“Good morning,” an altered high-pitched voice greeted the rest of the show. “Good morning, Nadia.”
Nadia wasn’t completely sure, but her first thought upon hearing the caller’s chuckle was that it was actually Justin. “Good… morning,” she hesitantly replied. “What can I do for you, John?”
“Well you may or may not remember me,” he began, and she could tell he was smiling, “but we spent an interesting couple of days together in the Hamptons over the Fourth of July, and I haven’t heard from you since then. So I was just wondering if you ever planned to call me back.”
She was right, it was Justin. She looked over to Rachel, who was on the verge of screaming in delight for her, but Nadia kept her cool. “Well John, I thought we agreed that you were the one that had to make the first move.”
“Well I went by your apartment and your friend said she would tell you I stopped by. And now I’m calling you and putting my business out there for the entire world, so… I’m outta moves,” he chuckled. “Your turn.”
“I’m sorry, back up for a minute. When was this supposed visit to my house,” she was grinning.
“Tuesday night, around eight, eight-thirty. I spoke with your friend, Alejandra; she was wearing navy blue scrubs and a scarf around her head. She was a bit brief, not totally rude, but she said she would let you know I stopped by.”
“Wow, you’re serious.”
“I am very serious.”
“I never got the message,” she regretted to inform him. It had been three days since then, and she’d certainly seen Alex several times throughout the week, so she couldn’t imagine why, but alas… “Well I guess the ball is in my court then.”
“Indeed, it is.”
“You guys should maybe go out on a date,” Rachel incorporated from her side of the room. She winked at Nadia and added, “A real one.”
“Yeah, John, I don’t know if you were listening earlier, but Nadia here just informed us that she’s never been in love with anybody,” Jeff supplied, much to Nadia’s chagrin. “Maybe you can help her out with that.”
“Yeah, I heard,” he chuckled lightly. “Maybe we can work on that.”
“So Let’s Be Honest has obviously now turned into Love Connection,” Caleb bitterly noted. “Awesome.”
“Well, not unless she says yes.”
Nadia hated to be put on the spot like this. Even if she had been looking for love, it most certainly would not have been with Justin Timberlake, but she couldn’t turn the guy down on the radio. Not after he’d gone so far as to stop by her apartment and call her on air. She certainly couldn’t say he didn’t try. “Yeah, sure. Why not.”
Rachel and Jeff cheered, while Caleb sulked about her decision. Justin only laughed. “So you’ll call me to set things up.”
“I will call you,” she promised.
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
An hour later, Justin was sitting in the lobby of the Soho Grand Hotel, supposed to be doing an interview with a guy from the New York Times. Instead, he was waiting for the guy, which would likely not bode well for their conversation. Justin was big on punctuality. Luckily, though, Nadia made good on her promise and he was immediately distracted from his irritation when her name popped up on his phone.
“Well that didn’t take long.”
“I have a few minutes while Rachel is doing the entertainment news,” she informed him. “So hi.”
“Hi.”
“I thought you didn’t listen to the show,” she recalled with a smile.
“Well I was up, and I found myself thinking about how you didn’t call me back, so I guess I just wanted to hear your voice.”
“You’re sweet.”
“Am I?”
“You’re trying to be, anyway.” She sighed, still unsure of this road she seemed to be barreling down, but it appeared that she didn’t have a choice in the matter at this point. She couldn’t back out now. “So you’re serious about this date, huh.”
“I am,” he returned skeptically, wondering if she was trying to find some way out of this. “Were you not?”
“No, no, we can go out. If you’re sure that’s what you want.”
“Why do you keep trying to scare me out of this?” he chuckled.
“I dunno,” she exhaled nervously. “I don’t know. I guess… in my head, if we’re just fucking, that’s fun, that’s harmless. But us dating? That sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.”
“Disasters are always waiting to happen. Why not see how it goes.”
“That’s cool with me, that’s fine. I just don’t want you to expect anything, I guess?”
“Trust me, Nadia, I don’t expect anything but maybe a nice evening out. And I’m leaving for Europe in a couple of days, so it won’t even be soon.”
“Oh, really? What’s in Europe?”
“I have a movie coming out?” he reminded her. “And lucky me, I get to spend the next few weeks promoting it.”
“This is the movie you did with Mila?” she guessed.
“That would be the one.”
“And is she gonna be in Europe with you?”
“She will,” he confirmed, though truth be told, he was not looking forward to that part in the least.
“I see.” She was doing her best not to sound disappointed, and possibly even jealous, but she wasn’t exactly known for her acting skills. “Well okay, we’ll go out when you get back then, I guess.”
“Is that all right?”
“Yeah, yeah. I’m great," she answered distractedly. "I have to get back to the show, but umm… call me, okay? If you want to, I mean.”
She suddenly sounded very unsure of herself, and Justin couldn’t gauge exactly why. “Of course I will.”
"And hey," she spoke softly, almost as if contrite, "you don't owe me anything, you know.”
“Nadia, why”“
“Just keep that in mind. I gotta go.”
And before he knew it, the line was dead. He wasn't sure what had just happened, or why Nadia was so skittish at the mention of Mila and Europe, but he was beginning to realize that perhaps she was right -- he had no idea what he was getting into. At that point, all he could hope was that it would be worth it.
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