twentyone: wedding bells and whistles
It was a perfect day. The warm end-of-summer breeze danced across the beachy scene, swirling flower petals and strands of hair into the air. A lone guitar riff played in the back of the audience as the wedding attendants made their way down the aisle. Mila with Ben, Becca with her husband Jon, Grant’s sister, Lexi, with Kristin’s brother, Kevin, Justin and Nadia… Despite the fact that they hadn’t exactly been getting along, they made a dashing couple. They were both long and lean, with impeccable smiles and an overall unique beauty about them, so it was no wonder why Kristin insisted that they walk down the aisle together. They fit together, even with the tension mounted all over their flawless faces.
They made it to the altar and separated, just as everyone else, waiting for Kristin to make her way down the aisle. She was radiant. Her fire red hair had been wrapped into an elegant bun, per Mila’s suggestion, and her sideswept bang perfectly accented her beautiful face. Her light freckles danced under the sun and the smile on her face illuminated her big, bright blue eyes. She was a stunning bride.
Grant had tears in his eyes as he watched his soon-to-be wife make her way down the aisle with her father. He knew she would be exquisite, but he often could not believe that she was his, and he was hers. It was almost too surreal to fathom. As she made his way up to him, he grinned brightly, took her hand into his, and whispered, “Jackpot.”
The ceremony went on as those things tended to do, and as they read their vows to one another, Justin couldn’t help but think of the day he married Mila. There was none of this pomp and circumstance “ just two people at a courthouse, professing their love for one another, but the sentiment was the same.
“Well, all right,” Kristin began, her strong southern accent tickling the air. “If this is where it has to happen, then this is where it has to happen. I’m not letting you get rid of me. How about that? Because I was doing this weird little thing called life, and things were okay, I was going through it all right with some of these guys and girls back here,” she pointed to the portions of the wedding party that she’d known before meeting Grant. “But it wasn’t complete. It wasn’t nearly close to being in the same vicinity as complete, because I wasn’t sharing it with you. This life? Not hearing your voice or laughing through it with you… I missed my husband. I missed you before I even knew who you were,” she grinned. “We live in a cynical world. A cynical, cynical world, and it’s a business of tough competitors.” And then the lines came that every woman in the room knew were coming. Justin found himself smiling at Nadia, a reference back to the conversation they had on their first and last date, but he quickly caught himself and retracted it before she could see. He went back to focusing on Kristin. “Grant Christopher Vener, I love you. You… complete me.”
Grant was beaming, watching as Kristin’s eyes welled with tears as her vows came pouring out. He couldn’t believe how happy he was in that moment. “You had me at hello,” he whispered just loud enough so that only she could hear.
“I didn’t say Hello, you dork,” she whispered back with a thousand-watt smile.
“You quote Jerry Maguire and I’m the dork,” he shook his head softly. Still grinning like a crazy person, he very simply vowed, “I will love you my whole life, Kristin. You and no other.”
Tears streamed down Kristin’s immaculately made up face as she whispered back, “I love you.”
It was then that Justin noticed Mila wiping at her eyes, and he almost felt a twinge of pain at the sight. But he caught her eye and offered a silly face, which made her roll her eyes at him playfully. They ended up smiling at one another as if they were the only two people on that beach.
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
The reception had been underway for the better part of two hours, and Justin was getting bored with the festivities, to say the least. He was avoiding his seat at the head table, where his only company was Nadia, who he’d chosen to keep conversation to a minimum with, and Becca, who was more engrossed in her husband and their daughter than anything he had to say. His dinner was done, he’d sweated enough on the dance floor for the time being, and when the DJ decided to play SexyBack, he knew it was his cue to head outside for some fresh air. He hoped not to be bothered by anyone, but when Mila came sauntering outside, he didn’t mind at all.
“Can I join you?” her gravelly voice greeted him.
He looked up, seeing her pulling off her bright red heels with one hand, balancing a plate full of cake with the other. “Be my guest,” he offered her a hand.
“It’s loud in there,” she sighed, plopping down on the step beside him. “I was starting to feel claustrophobic.”
“They’ve got a nice crowd in there,” he agreed.
She took a first bite of her cake and shrieked at the delicacy. “Holy shit, have you tasted this?”
“I have not,” he chuckled, watching her devour it. He attempted to steal a dollop of the icing from her plate, only to be stabbed by her fork. “Did I say you could have some?”
“Well I just figured if you’re gonna orgasm at one bite, I should try some.”
“You most definitely should. But not off of this here plate, sir.”
“Seriously?”
“Seriously.”
“Mila. Just a little crumb.”
“No!”
He made another play for her plate, getting punched in the arm this time. “Mila!”
“I’m so serious, dude. Back up!” She quickly stuffed what was left of the slice into her mouth and began to scrape any leftover icing off of it as well.
Justin looked on in a mixture of disgust and amusement. “You’re a pig,” he laughed.
“Damn right,” she returned with a mouth full of cake. “You truly need to go in a get some, though. And get me another piece while you’re in there.”
His first instinct was to tell her she was crazy, but after the fuss she made, he really did want to try some, so he headed inside, where there was a long line of people waiting for a slice of this coveted cake. Kristin spotted him in the line, and made it a point to finally take some time out to talk to her friend.
“Hey, you.”
He turned to the voice, surprised that she had found a moment for him. “Well hello, Mrs. Vener,” he offered a kiss to her cheek. “Fancy meeting you here.”
“I know, right.”
“You look beautiful.”
“You’re not so bad yourself,” she grinned, linking arms with him. “God, I’m glad you’re here.”
“Really?”
“Of course! I mean, I know I haven’t had any time to spend with you lately, but just knowing you’re here has been such a big relief, dude. You’re my… Justin.”
He smiled. “Well where else would I be?”
“There are a great number of places I’m sure you could be.” She lowered her voice a bit as she added, “Especially considering everything going on with Mila, and then with Nadia… but you’re here with no qualms and I appreciate that, friend.”
“Well listen… I know I haven’t been the greatest friend over the past few months, so I’m the one who appreciates being included in all of this. You and Grant, you know I love you guys, right?”
“We do.”
“So. It’s nice that, despite my many shortcomings, you guys don’t forget that.”
“You’re too hard on yourself,” she patted his back as they reached the front of the line. “Your heart is in the right place, and we know that. Everyone knows that.”
“I’m not so sure everyone does,” he chuckled, taking a look at the giant cake before them. “Now what is this cake that’s got Mila out there shaking like a crackhead?”
“Well,” Kristin began, taking plates for herself and her new husband, “you know I’m a Southern belle, so this is sweet potato cake with cinnamon cream cheese icing. And I promise, Justin, it’ll change your life.”
He took two plates for himself and offered one more kiss on the cheek to his buddy. “We’ll see if you’re right about that.”
Come and put your name on it
Come and put your name on it
Bet you wanna put your name on it
Come and put your name on it
He returned to the serenity of the deck with Mila and handed over her requested dessert, which she had finished before he even got comfortable on the stairs. “Jesus, Mila.”
“It’s good!”
“How much have you had to drink?”
“To be honest, not a lot,” she replied, a bit surprised herself. “But I mean, when you have catering that includes bacon, Chick-Fil-A, and a sweet potato cake, who needs alcohol?”
“This is true,” he smiled, finally taking a bite of his cake. He wasn’t sure about life-changing, but it was certainly good. “The Veners have good taste.”
“’The Veners,’” she repeated with a chuckle. “God, how weird is that.”
“I know. They’ve been together, what, ten years now?”
“Eleven.”
“Their courtship outlasted our entire marriage.”
“So it would appear.”
“Well. Here’s hoping your next one will be better.” He tried to sound optimistic for her, but the pain he felt was apparent in his voice.
“I know you don’t think so, but James is a good guy.”
“I don’t have any opinion on him one way or the other, Mi.”
“You do.”
“I mean, it’s a little questionable that he’s not here with you, but who am I to judge.”
“He works very hard,” she defended her man.
“It’s Labor day.”
“No rest for the wicked,” she shrugged. “As long as he’s at our wedding, I don’t give a fuck, to be honest.”
“I thought you weren’t having a wedding.”
“You know what I mean. Don’t be an asshole.”
“It is ridiculous that it makes me smile when you say that,” he chuckled softly. “Reminds me of the old days.”
“Makes you feel nostalgic, huh.”
“It does.” Finishing what was left of his cake, he sat his plate down on the step below him and leaned back against the step behind him, which allowed him a perfect view of Mila’s perfect face. He found himself studying the traces of sadness that lingered on it. “Did you know that nostalgia literally means ‘the pain of an old wound?’”
“Really?” she looked back to him. “Like it’s not supposed to be a good feeling?”
“I think that’s what people associate it with now, but if we think about it, I think it’s something that makes you ache a little bit. It’s a twinge in your heart, far more powerful than just a ride down memory lane.”
“Yeah, I guess it does hurt a little bit to look back on things. On good things, anyway.”
“It’s why songs like In My Life and Good Riddance resonate with people so much. Everyone has that something they look back on with fondness, but also a longing.”
“’The pain of an old wound,’” she pondered. “Wow.”
“I know.”
They sat in silence for minutes, just listening to the sounds around them “ the wind, the music from inside, the water. It was so peaceful. Mila knew how much he liked the quiet, but she hated it, so she broke it. “What are you thinking about?”
“Something weird,” he admitted.
“Like…”
“Like… I don’t know. I feel… It feels like I’ve been watching my own life unfold, Mila. Watching it go by, and I keep scratching at it, trying to get into it. And I can’t.”
“What does that mean?” she pressed him.
“I dunno.” He peered into the darkness, fixating on the endless ocean, almost seeing himself in it. Lost in the abyss. Finally, he went on. “When we were together, at the end, I was seeing myself make all these stupid mistakes. I saw you sleeping on the couch, I saw the distance between us widening, I saw myself pushing you away… But I didn’t know how to intercede and fix it. I didn’t know how to stop myself.”
“You didn’t want to, Justin.”
“I did.”
“If you wanted to stop, you would have.”
“I have to believe that there’s more to it than that.”
“There isn’t.”
“I worshipped you.”
She smirked. “Yeah, you did. Until you didn’t.”
“I don’t remember when I stopped…”
“There was some point “ some tragic point “ in our marriage where you seemed to realize that you were bored. That we were growing up and things weren’t as ‘fun’ as they used to be, and the whole idea of being married was no longer appealing. It was just… being married.”
“I think that’s true.”
“I know it’s true.” She sighed, feeling that ache of the past. But it wasn’t because she longed for it, it was because those memories were painful then, and they were still painful now.
“For what it’s worth… I’m sorry.”
She waved her hand, as if to dismiss it as nothing. “Water under the bridge at this point.”
“Well why couldn’t it have been water under the bridge then?”
“Seriously?” she peered at him, but eventually lightened to a chuckle.
“I just wish things had turned out different for us.”
“I know you do.”
“Do you?”
She exhaled loudly, as she pondered this very question rather often. Resting her head on his shoulder she asked him, “What would you have done if you were me? Would you have loved you?”
“Mila, I was surprised you ever loved me,” he softly confessed.
More silence enveloped them, because she didn’t know how to respond to that. She didn’t know what to do with the thought that she might have been too good to love him. From various arguments over the years, she knew he felt that way, and she always felt uneasy when he said it. She just couldn’t understand why that ever crossed his mind.
“Well,” she finally spoke again, adjusting so that they were perpendicular and her head now rested on his thigh. “I guess none of this really matters. I have James, you have Nadia. We’re in different lives now.”
His fingers innately played with the strands of her hair that were strewn across his lap. “I’m not with Nadia,” he smirked. “I guess you haven’t noticed, but we’re not even speaking.”
This news made Mila especially happy, if she were to be honest, but she was making it a point not to show it. “Hmm. Why is that?”
“A number of reasons. But mainly, I just don’t trust her.”
“Wow. That is a far cry from the couple that showed up at my birthday party together.”
“We weren’t a couple then either,” he rolled his eyes. “Just a couple of people getting to know each other.”
“And now that you know her, you aren’t as into the nonstop sex, I guess.”
He looked down at her in a slight embarrassment, only to see her big, colorful eyes staring back up at him. “I guess not.”
“It’s not like you guys were trying to hide anything,” she appended.
“We weren’t,” he agreed. “And what’s funny is, that only started because she said you were being a bitch to her.”
Mila immediately popped up from her comfortable position and looked at him squarely. “You fucking liar.”
“I shit you not,” he laughed. “She was actually mad at me before you came along. So I guess I should thank you for that weekend.”
Mila had been annoyed by it at the time, but knowing she was the reason for it, she was heated. And not in a bad way. She eyed him just long enough for it to become uncomfortable. “You wanna go back to the house?”
Even if he hadn’t known what that meant, he probably would have gone. “…Sure.”
It’s not even her birthday but I wanna lick the icing off
Give it to her in the worst way
Can’t wait to blow her candles out
I want that cake, cake, cake, cake, cake…
After making a discreet exit from the reception, they stumbled and fumbled their way up to Justin’s room, tearing off each other’s red and navy blue attire faster than their minds could stop them.
In the year they had been apart, Mila hated to admit that she missed the way Justin fucked her. James was great, because he was attentive and he obviously cared about pleasing her first. When he was around, of course. But Justin, he just instinctively knew exactly what to do. He didn’t have to ask, he didn’t even seem to think about it. His kisses, his hands, his stroke just answered every unasked question she had.
Remember how you did it, remember how you fit it
If you still wanna kiss it, come, come and get it
Sweeter than a rice cake, cake worth sipping
Kill it, tip it, cake, fill it
Justin’s hands were full of Mila “ her hair, her face, her thighs “ he couldn’t get enough. He had missed her so much, and he wasn’t afraid to show it. As his tongue made its way down her neck and he pulled off her bra, he felt like he was 20 again, doing it with her for the first time. His mouth filled with her breasts and continued down her torso, circling her belly button with his tongue with a smile. He never thought he’d be back there again, but even so, he stopped just before removing her thong. “You’re gonna regret this in the morning,” he warned her.
She smirked and did him the favor of pulling off her own underwear, positioning herself on top of him. “Never stopped me before.”
Ooh baby I like it, you’re so excited
Don’t try to hide it, I’mma make you my bitch
Maybe Kristin was right. Maybe that cake did change his life.
Cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake…
Lyrics: “Birthday Cake” “ Rihanna (Talk That Talk)
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