Rachel stood outside the door looking at Lance. He didn't acknowledge her, but she knew he knew she was there. Sighing inwardly and she moved to stand next him. She rested her butt against the railing as she faced back toward the house. She stared at him silently.
"You get the short straw too?" Lance asked, opening his eyes to look at Rachel. His eyes flickered toward her wounds and forced himself to relax. "You should be resting."
"And I will," Rachel placed her hand over his on the railing and gave a triumphant smile when he threaded their fingers and shifted to stand in front of her. "So don't make me beg and pull teeth. What happened?"
Lance blew out a breath and stared over Rachel's head. "The guys have big mouths." He saw Rachel's eyebrow raise in question and he shook his head. "I know it's not big surprise. I know sometimes it's worse then a bunch of girls gossiping on the bus sometimes, but its never been this big."
"What were they talking about?" She squeezed his hand reassuringly.
"Us."
Rachel's face fell. 'Guess it was a 'girlfriend' slam,' she thought. "Why were they talking about us? And what did they say? And what does it matter if they were on the bus?"
JC's name was on his lips before he stifled it in time. He hadn't been as clueless as Chris when it came to his friend's feelings. Nor was he as clueless when it came to his 'girlfriend's' feelings. But he didn't think it was his place to say anything on the matter. So he fast forwarded the conversation in his mind. "They were talking about the drama surrounding us, particularly Joey and Mel and then how you were my cover."
"Oh no..." Rachel breathed his face paling as understanding donned. "You said they were on the bus?" She closed her eyes as the answer came to her without Lance having to say anything. "Kristen..."
Lance nodded, "She overheard. Joey said with the whole conversation they had, there was no way to play it off so he told her the truth."
"So she knows." Rachel stated and leaned forward resting her forehead against Lance's chest. "Damn. I don't think Joey can stop her from saying something. You know those damn friends she has."
Lance wrapped his arms around her waist, holding her lightly. "I didn't plan for anyone to know about this until I was ready for everyone to know. This is an unknown that I hadn't planned on. And I should have. I should have planned for the fact if someone let it slip."
"Don't Lance. Don't beat yourself up over it." She entwined her good arm around his back, pulling him closer to her. "It's not your fault. Not your fault."
"I don't know what to do. What can I do? Should I do nothing and see if she has a shred of decency and keeps her mouth shut? But then I'll be living each day waiting for the other shoe to drop. Should I pay her off?"
Rachel whipped her head up so fast, she barely missed knocking Lance's. "Don't even think about that. Do not give her money. That's just more ammunition."
"Well she already has the smokin' gun." Lance sighed, his shoulders dropping. "I don't know what to do."
Rachel said nothing but tightened her hold on Lance. She leaned against him, hoping to give him some sort of comfort. She had no words to offer. She wasn't sure what there was she could say. Kristen was a unknown. None of the guys trusted her, but she was Joey's wife and they had to tolerate her. But she definitely held a major piece of news that could create a lot of chaos for the band and her included.
"You were my only choice to do this with. The cover," Lance spoke softly. "There isn't anyone else I would trust with something like this. I don't think I really ever thought about the sacrifice you made to do this for me."
"There was no sacrifice, Lance. I wanted to do this. I knew what I was getting into." Rachel lifted her head meeting Lance's green ones. "And I would do it again." She told him firmly. "Are we calling it quits? You kicking me to the curb? Because if you are you have lousy timing."
Lance shook his head and sent her a smile. "Aren't you worried you're gonna miss the one while you're stuck pretending with me?"
His words stopped her for moment. When they had first started this charade she wasn't looking to the anyone, let alone 'the one'. But somehow, someway her feelings sneaked up on her; for someone who had been around all along. But how could she just leave Lance to pursue her own chance at happiness? He needed her help, he trusted her to be his cover. How could such an easy decision not so long ago, now seem like a not so easy decision?
"You know that I love you right?" Rachel countered but she couldn't forget his words. She didn't know how long she would be playing Lance's girlfriend. And what if during that time she was pretending the man she was meant to be with crossed paths with hers and she didn't know it. What then? Because sooner than later, the charade would end and Lance would need a cover anymore. "Aside from Mel, I consider you one of my best friends."
A soft smile played on Lance's lips and he gave her a hug. "I know, Rachel. You are without a doubt my best friend... of the female variety," he laughed. "And I love you too. And that's why I don't want to be the reason you miss out."
Rachel stared at Lance, her mind rolling, searching. "Do you know something I don't? Why are you bringing this up all of a sudden? Are you trying to protect me in case Kristen starts something about our relationship? Because while I appreciate the sentiment I don't need it." She watched him for another moment. "No. There's something else. You do know something. What is it?"
Lance took a deep breath and brought Rachel to his arms. “I'm not blind, Rachel. And let me just get this out before you try and interrupt me. I know the other four guys as well as I know myself. And I'm not going to be the reason you don't see what happens with you and Josh. He doesn't just open up to anyone. Or hop on a plane for just anyone. I...” he took a breath. “I don't want to lose you, Rachel. I'm not saying I want to break up. I'm not sure what Kristen will do, and I'm not ready to come out yet. But,” he held up his hand, “don't lie to me and tell me there's no feelings between you and JC. We've been through too much for that.”
Rachel's eyes cut quickly to JC and Melissa talking. She went to look at Lance's face and sighed. “I like him. I mean, I think I do. He doesn't know how I feel, I'm not even sure how I feel,” her voice trailed off and she shook her head slightly. “I'm sorry,” she whispered, feeling ashamed.
Lance's mind was trying to go in two different directions. Part of him wanted to be upset. Rachel had said she loved him, wanted to be his girlfriend even if it was just an act until he was ready to come out. That small bit of jealousy went through him until he realized that Rachel was confessing to him that she liked someone. Someone who would-and could- love her like he wanted to. Even better it was a guy he considered a brother. “I've seen the way he looks at you when you don't think anyone else sees. He likes you, Rachel.”
“But I love you,” Rachel told Lance. “I'm scared...Of letting him like me. I'm scared for you,” Rachel's mind had started going through what was going to happen to Lance if Kristen let it be known that he was gay. Each scenario that played out in her mind was worse than the last. She hated that for him, the negative light that would be cast on his family. Especially since it was widely publicized that Lance had grown up in a church going home and now he was found out to be gay. As well as the drama surrounding anyone associated with the group.
“I'll be okay. We'll be okay,” Lance leaned in and kissed her lips. “I need you to keep being my girlfriend for now...but...I don't want you to hide from JC. There's not many men like him.” Lance smiled as he watched JC and Melissa on the couch and talk, both of them smiling. “I want you to talk to him soon.”
Rachel squeezed Lance's hand, leaning her body more into his. “I will. I just..I'm sad. I didn't set out looking for someone. And I thought if you found someone, I could let you go easy. I mean, this was all for show.”
“The feelings weren't, Rachel. I feel so genuinely blessed that you are in my life like this. Besides, the sex was out of this world. Who else can say they turned a gay man straight for a night?”
Rachel chuckled at the grin on his face, reaching up to pull his face towards hers for a quick kiss. “So..we're still a united front. Kristen won't say a damn word. I'll have lawyers so far up her ass, if she coughs, my grandpa's two thousand dollar pen made from the bark of some foreign tree will come out her nose. She's not going to intimidate you. Or me..or anyone else.”
Lance led her to the door, grabbing the handle before stopping. “You'll talk to Josh. You aren't hiding behind me. You wouldn't let me fade into the wood work if there was some guy I thought I liked, would you?”
“Hell no, Bass. I'd make you get all handsomely sexied up and shove you out there as man candy.”
“You've been spending entirely too much time with my sister,” Lance told Rachel, pulling the door open and going into the kitchen. “Man candy...” he muttered. “Is this what you girls talk about when we men aren't around?”
“I'm not telling our secrets. I don't want to know what you guys talk about. Actually I know what you talk about, at least four fifths of you,” Rachel smiled at Lance, trying not to worry. “You won't cave in to Kristen right?” she asked him once more, her voice in a harsh whisper, her facade cracking just a little.
“No. And I don't want you to worry. Joey won't let her do anything.”
Rachel nodded, trying to smile for him. She blushed a little when she heard Melissa yelp and yell at JC. “We better get in there before she jabs one of her crutches in his foot. How do you explain that?”
“As long as he can still sing, I don't care.” Lance caught the slight blush on Rachel's face and knew as much as it scared him, he was going to get her and JC to admit their feelings for one another. At least someone on the NSYNC circus deserved to be happy.
Author's Chapter Notes:
Enjoy. I have a couple more chapters to post before you all are caught up. Please review if you read, I love hearing what you all think. Can't believe this story has gotten so many reads. Thank you for making this so fun for me!!
Story Tags: joey
