“I’d open up two more.”
I nod and do it, placing the books on top of the table when I get them out of the box and remove the plastic protective wrap around them. Our flight took off at six this morning, and we got into Houston a few hours ago . While my mom went to rest at the hotel, Raegan and I went to the bookstore to scope it out and set up everything for the signing this afternoon. He’s been surprisingly civil with me, considering what happened, but then again, we’ve always been able to maintain a professional relationship when it comes to my mothers career. That’s how he is, and it’s why I’m confident I can show him Justin’s book, that he’ll take it seriously.
If he doesn’t it’s crazy, and even though I might be a little biased, I can’t deny that I couldn’t put it down at the airport and during the flight to Houston this morning. It’s very good, very well written for an amateur. There’s forty stories in total, and I haven’t gotten through them all. They all involve the same boy, the same family. I know he based the characters off himself and his family, even though the names of the people and places aren’t the same. There’s emotion in every sentence. It made me laugh, made me tear up at times, and I’m still not done.
The last story I read, was about the boys grandmother passing away, and I could tell...that was the one that was the hardest for Justin.
I think I’ve gotten to know almost everything about him through his stories, and that makes him a great author. One that Raegan shouldn’t pass up, and I’m going to ensure he gets a look at the book, no matter what. After all, he doesn’t have to know who the author is right away. As long as he sees dollar signs after he reads the first story, that’s all that counts. That’s what will ensure Justin’s future.
Our relationship.
It’s so premature, but I really can’t deny how deep my feelings go for him. He drove me all the way back to Greensboro yesterday, his fingers laced through mine, a soft smile on his face as I talked to him about this or that. It didn’t matter, he was just happy being there with me, and it was so hard...so damn hard to say goodbye to him.
“I’ll see you soon,” he promised me, as we stood outside the hotel. “Don’t worry.”
“Write me,” I said, after I kissed him. “Promise me you’ll write.”
This time, I could see it in his eyes, that he wouldn’t have missed out on it for the world. “I’ll write you everyday until you come back to me. I’ll call you too, every night.”
It was sappy, but that’s one of the things I love about him. He’s more emotional than people think...more romantic, more caring. His family can’t see it. He’s too closed off with them due to one thing or the other. Being one of six kids, as I found out from his stories, must have something to do with it.
“We’ll make it work,” I told him, as he turned back to his rickety old pick up truck. “I know it, Justin.”
He turned back to me, and pushed away from his truck, not being able to contain himself. He caught my lips with his and swept me up in another long kiss. I knew he didn’t want to let me go, and it was killing him inside, that he had to go back home.
“I love you,” he whispered.
“I love you too.”
He kissed me again, and had to force himself to leave after that. I watched him go, trying my best not to break down.
It’s so hard.
It shouldn’t be this hard for two people to be together, and it might be selfish, but I’m going to use Raegan to my advantage if I can. Being with Justin is the happiest I’ve ever felt, and I know...I just know that if we had the chance to be together full time, we’d never be apart again.
“It should be a good turn out. The manager here told me they’ve had people on the waiting list for weeks,” Raegan tells me, once everything is in it’s proper place. He stands with his hands on his hips, peering out into the huge bookstore, his eyes glistening with profit.
“I bet.”
He glances at me. “You know, Es...about the other night...”
“It doesn’t matter,” I say quickly. “You had every right to be angry.”
“Maybe we should just stick to being friends,” he says gently. “I think...I think it’s for the best.”
If I could find a way to let confetti rain down from the ceiling, I’d do it. “That’s a great idea, Raegan.”
He smirks, slightly. “Good.”
“Hey...are you reading right now?”
He shrugs, as he goes back to staring out into the store. “I’m always reading. Why?”
“I think I might have something for you.”
He laughs. “Don’t tell me you’ve started writing now too?”
“Well no, a friend of mine wrote it.”
He glances at me. “Yeah?”
I nod, and reach into my purse, pulling out the binder filled with Justin’s book. “I think you’d be interested.”
He gives me a suspicious look, but takes it anyway, opening up the black cover as soon as the thing is in his hands. His eyes shift around, pages turn, and I know he’s doing his normal skimming that he usually does with something new. “Comfort fiction.” He mumbles it, but the pages keep turning. “Like something you’d curl up with on the couch during a rainy day. It’s relatable, people will like it. What’s the title?”
“There’s no title yet.”
He stops reading and looks up at me. I can tell he likes it, a lot, even though he’s trying to hide that from me. “So you just magically came across something like this?”
I shrug.
“There’s talent here,” he sighs. “A hell of a lot of talent. Do you know how much garbage I’ve flipped through this month?”
“Too much?”
He smirks. “There’s gotta be a catch. The last time I read something I felt this strongly about, I signed your mother.”
“Well you’re obviously interested...”
“It’s him isn’t it?”
Okay, I probably couldn’t put that one past him, but I was sure ready to try. Now, I can’t lie to him anymore. Even if I did, he would find out the truth eventually. “Maybe but...”
“You’ve gotta be kidding,” he laughs, and shoves the binder back into my arms. “No way. No no no.”
“Raegan!” I call after him, when he starts walking away from me. “Raegan just wait!” He pushes himself out the door of the store, but I follow him, pull him to a stop on the sidewalk. “Would you just listen to me for a minute? I thought we were friends.”
“It’s fucking...too awkward, Esmerelda. Jesus.” He pushes the button on his rental keys and the alarm beeps off. “What are you trying to do?”
“He’s really good, Rae. Come on.”
“I just...I mean, how can you expect...look, just forget it. I’m not doing this.”
“I love him. If you won’t do it for his talent, do it for me...somebody who has stuck by your side as a friend even if you’ve been a jerk half the time.”
He pauses when his key is inserted into the lock, and his eyes close, like he’s trying to make me disappear. He knows I’m right.
“Raegan, I do. I love him, and I know that....I know you feel a certain way about me, and I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I can’t be with you like you want me to be, but are you really going to pass this up? I know you’re antsy for a new deal.”
He drops his hands at his sides and groans harshly. I know he’s giving in, because he cares about me. I think it’s hard for him, trying to figure out what the feelings he has for me mean. It’s my own fault. I had drunken sex with him, but he’s done that enough with plenty of women to know that it never works out.
“Why him and not me,” he finally says.
“What?”
“I mean, what is it? Am I that bad, Es?”
“No I...I’m just not your type.”
He stares at me for a while, his eyes sad, tired, and hopeless. “You’re my type. You are.”
“I lead you on,” I mutter.
“No...if anything, I pushed it. I shouldn’t have pushed it. Maybe you...”
“We’re not the best match, Raegan. If we did get together, if we got married, we’d end up like my mom and dad. I don’t want that, and I know you don’t. In fact, I wish you’d stop dating all those bimbos mom tells me about. You need a nice girl. She’d change you, make you a lot more mellow and down to earth. People might like you more.”
He rolls his eyes. “My life is too hectic for a nice girl, Es.”
“Maybe not. In fact, I think I might have just the girl for you.”
He cocks his head to the side. “Oh yeah?”
“Yeah, but you’re not getting anything from me unless you agree to take a closer look at that book.”
“That’s not fair. For all I know this girl could be...”
“You should trust me, really, Rae. You’ve known me long enough.”
He sighs. “God, Jesus...” He puts his hands on top of the car and hangs his head low.
“Is that a yes?” I smirk.
“Fine. But I’m not making any promises. The book looks good but it needs work and the publisher, I mean...they have to like it too. I’m going to have to work with it for six months before I can try to market it to anybody.”
“Good enough, Raegan. I really...I really appreciate it.”
“Yeah,” he nods. “I know you do.” He comes around to the other side of the car, and pecks my cheek quickly before opening my door for me. “How’d you meet this guy anyway?”
“In a bookstore,” I laugh. “Where else?”
That wasn’t so bad. Everything is coming together, falling into place. Justin will get to live his dream now, writing, and he’ll be able to move away from that small town life, back to the city, with me, and we’ll be able to have something incredible. Something only a few people are able to experience in their lifetime. I smile as Raegan shuts me in the car, and gets into the drivers seat. I can see the future in front of me, staring me in the face, and for the first time, I love what I see.
I can’t wait to start it. Start everything, with Justin, Mr. Sports Fiction himself, by my side.
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