Tara's POV:

"Oh my God, she's just the most precious thing I've ever seen," Lynn breathed as she bent over Riley's crib in my bedroom. She was lying on her back and gazing up at her grandmother with those blue eyes that run in her daddy's family. "Can I - is it okay if I pick her up?" she asked, arms already reaching down to pick up the little bundle that was gurgling away happily at our presence.

Paul, Justin and Lynn had just arrived from the airport and just like Justin said, they had come on the very first plane out of Memphis the day after Justin had broken the news to them.

I, for one, had been terrified of what Lynn's reaction was going to be. Justin was on the phone with her for almost an hour, trying to explain why she had a three-month-old granddaughter that she'd never even heard of. But then again, Lynn knows Justin better than anyone and once he told her my reason for leaving she could sort of understand it. She didn't condone it but could see where I was coming from. She told me all of this as she held Riley and sat on my bed with me. Justin and Paul had gone downstairs to bring their luggage in; everyone had been so anxious to see the baby that they forgot their stuff.

We'd moved all of my and Riley's things back to my house earlier that morning, now that Justin was here. There was no way in hell I was putting up with an infant and two adults who acted less mature than the baby did. Besides, it was time for her to get used to her real home. I knew she'd miss Sasha, who was like her second mommy, but I also knew Lynn would happily take up and slack that was left.

"I'm glad you're not upset with me," I told Lynn who was still gazing adoringly at my little girl. "It's hard to explain to anyone, much less hope that they'll understand it. I was going crazy with hormones and I thought it was the right thing to do. And in some ways I still believe that so … I can't apologize for it. I can only hope that you understand." I crossed my fingers and toes and waited for her response. Lynn never pulled any punches and if she was pissed, she was going to let me know for sure.

Instead, she sighed. "I'm not angry with you Tara," she said, brushing Riley's cheek with the back of her hand. "I just wish things could've been different, that's all. But what's in the past is in the past as far as I'm concerned. Okay?" She glanced over at me and smiled sincerely, making me relax immediately.

"Okay!" I said happily, glad to get all that junk out of the way. "Now … how long can you guys stay? I want you to know you can stay as long as you want and come to visit her anytime you want. I want her to know her grandma really well, 'cause she's only gonna have one." Just thinking about it made me sad, wishing for my own Momma back. But she was gone and I had this precious new bundle to take care of and that's all I was focused on. Nobody else mattered as much as Riley.

And everyone seemed to feel the same way. Everyone who met her snatched her right out of my arms and cooed and sang to her, talked baby talk and generally made fools of themselves like people do when babies are involved. But I was the biggest fool of all - I cooed and did all that crap all day long. Even Sasha did it, which believe me, was a huge shock. But she adored Riley and showered her with more love than I'd ever seen her do anyone. Someone had finally broken through the heart that had been locked ever since I met her.

Justin and Paul came back upstairs and after Justin showing Paul tot heir room, they came back in.

"What're y'all doing? Momma, don't hog her. Giver her to me," Justin whined and Lynn and I rolled our eyes together.

"Paul hasn't even held her yet," Lynn admonished her own bratty son. She held Riley out to him and he smiled and rocked her gently while he scrutinized her.

"She looks exactly like you," he told me and I smiled at him. I loved hearing that, never got enough of it. Not that I think I'm hot shit or anything, but just because people used to say that about me when I was little to my mom. It just brought back happy memories. "Except for the eyes, I think," he went on. "And maybe the nose looks a little like Justin's. Whoever she looks like, she's gorgeous. You're going to have to beat the men away with a stick, Daddy," he said to Justin who looked indignant suddenly.

"Boys? She ain't never going out, Dad," he told Paul. "She's only a few fucking months old … don't make me start worrying about that now, too."

He was so comical. But I could tell he meant what he said. Poor Riley would be lucky if she got to go to a co-ed school, much less date. Thinking back on how overprotective Justin was of me, I could only imagine how he would treat his little girl.

His little girl. God, it felt so good to say that and see him here with his family. Finally I had done the right thing and brought everyone together. All the family Riley needed was right there, standing around her.

'What about her christening? Did you hold it already?" Lynn asked, and I could tell she was hoping I'd say no. I put her out of her misery and told her that I was planning to have it in a few weeks. I also told them that I wanted Mike to be one of her godparents as well as Jen and Sasha as godmothers.

Justin huffed and puffed, setting himself up to disagree. "Don't I get a say in any of this? She's mine, too, T. What if I want someone else?"

I just gave him a look that said 'kiss my ass'. "Justin, do you really disagree with who I picked? And you can pick the second godfather and we all know it's going to be Trace," I said and he looked chastened. "Or do you have other females in mind?" Because if he thought he was making someone like Cameron the godmother, I'd kick his ass all the way back to Cali.

"Umm," he mumbled and I laughed under my breath. "Yeah, I want Trace to be the godfather, too. But I don't want Sasha to be the godmother! I forbid it, T! Can't you pick someone else?"

Forbid? I actually laughed out loud at that, along with Paul and Lynn. Justin was so ridiculous sometimes. "Justin. You know she's been my best friend through all of my life. And she's helped me with Riley more that anyone else, and loves her almost as much as I do. So get over it, because I want Riley surrounded by people who love her and want nothing but the best for her. You saw her with her yesterday and today," I reminded him. "Riley loves her, too, she's the person she knows the best besides me. I'm not going to deprive her of someone who truly loves her just because you can't let go of some petty argument that no one even remembers how it started." With that, I folded my hands across my chest to emphasize my point but he knew I meant business so, as he can easily do, he changed the subject to keep himself from looking like a fool.

"Can I have her back, Dad?" he asked Paul, who promptly handed her over to her daddy. He started talking to her softly, kissing her cheeks every few seconds and humming. Justin was in love for sure, and I knew he'd already started thinking about how he was going to get to see her with him living in California and me not. Oh well, it was his problem, not mine. What my problem was at that moment was when Riley started crying and moving her little head around, pecking at Justin's chest.

"What'd I do? What's wrong?" Justin asked anxiously. Boy, we were really starting from scratch here.

I held out my arms. "She's just hungry," I told him, recognizing the sound of the cry. I could tell when she wet, or hungry, or just disgruntled now. She was starting to form a personality and I was scared to see that it was a lot like Justin's. She wanted what she wanted, when she wanted it. Which was usually immediately.

He breathed a sigh of relief. "Oh," he said, and handed her to me. Paul and Lynn took that cue to go freshen up. Lynn had visited before so I told her and Paul to make themselves welcome and I'd come downstairs as soon as Riley was done eating. Unfortunately, Justin sat down on the bed and relaxed, like he'd been at the house for months.

I grabbed a receiving blanket and began unbuttoning the top of my dress. Everything I wore now had buttons at the top so I could easily breast feed anywhere at anytime. I probably shouldn't have let Justin stay but he wanted to be anywhere Riley was those days. So I figured it wouldn't hurt. It's not like he hadn't seen my breasts a million times before. Still, though, I covered Riley's face with the blanket so that he really couldn't see anything anyway.

"Does it hurt?"

"Does what hurt?"

"That," he pointed at my left breast, which Riley was now attached to. "Does it hurt when they eat?"

I shook my head. "No, not really. It hurts that you can't put lotion on them or anything … you have to keep them clean so the baby won't accidentally get something into their system. God, do I miss lotion … my nipples are cracked and sort of dry. That part hurts; not holding her or anything."

He nodded. I forgot how much he liked to hear about medical stuff, usually stuff that grossed other people out. Not Justin though. He was inquisitive as ever. "Can't you put, like, Vaseline or something on them at least?"

I shook my head again. "Nope. I'm au naturel, as they say."

He was quiet for a minute, then back to the questions. "Can I see her eat?"

Part of me wanted to say no but then part of me didn't want to make a big deal about it. I shrugged. "Sure," I replied, and then moved the blanked away so he could see. Riley's eyes were closed and her tiny fist rested on my breast as her mouth worked furiously. I loved breast-feeding her. Usually it was me and her, lying down together with her on my chest. Those times were so special to me; it was like I could feel the bond between us growing stronger. I was going to hate weaning her off, I knew, which I planned to do in a few weeks. Not because I really wanted to but because you were really limited to being with her twenty-four hours a day so she could eat. With formula, she could eat anywhere. So I relished each time I fed her because I knew it wasn't going to last much longer.

"Wow," Justin said, his eyes enormous. "It makes me jealous," he sort of mumbled and then looked surprised. I don't think he planned to say that out loud.

"Jealous of what?" He could be so strange sometimes.

He shrugged. "You get to be so close to her all the time, like that," he motioned at the baby while I effortlessly switched breasts. "I don't get to really share anything with her, you know? I have to wait until she's older.

"No, that's not true," I told him. "You know I play your records for her all the time? I wanted her to know your voice and everything … so I play your music and videos so you wouldn't be a complete stranger. That's why she doesn't cry when you hold her. She's very particular about who holds her and everything, but she knows your voice so I think she feels safe with you."

Justin's eyes got even bigger. "You did that? Damn … I wish I had been here so she could've gotten used to me instead of my records doing the job." He touched her cheek with his hand and it accidentally made contact with my breast. We both froze instantly, unsure of what to do. Because as soon as he touched me I knew that there was still something there. Lust, maybe, I don't know what it was, but it was something. Both of us knew it and while he looked like he wanted to do it again I was getting ready to get up and run as far away from him as I could.

We were not going back down that path again. Ever. I didn't care how special his touch made me feel, we were over. To prove my point, I asked him a question.

"So did you tell Cameron?"

Justin's POV:

Shit. Cameron. How could I have fucking forgot about her?

But I had. I hadn't given a moment's thought to her since seeing my baby girl.

My baby girl. Wow. This shit is awesome, I feel like I'm high on speed or something, this is so huge. I've always wanted to be a dad, not necessarily this soon but shit, I wasn't turning away from it now that something has happened.

She's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. Nothing and nobody compares to her, except my momma and T, of course. But Riley comes first now. Funny how easily your life can totally fucking change on you without any warning.

Shit there I go again. Fucking forgetting about Cameron. So I decided to call her right then and there, thanks to T reminding me of her. She smirked when she said it too, but what else was she gonna do, jump up and down that I was still dating the girl that caused us to break up? No, wait. I can't place all the fucking blame on Cam. I was deep in that shit too and should've known better than to fuck around on Tara again. It was just as much my fault as it was Cam's.

I excused myself and T knew exactly what I was doing. I ignored her and went into the guest bedroom that I was staying in. It was Tara's old bedroom from when I first met here. Wow. All the shit that's gone on in that room had me wandering way way back in time. But that's not what I came in the room for, so I closed my mind off to anything but Cam and made the call. She answered right away.

"Where the fuck have you been?" she practically screamed at me. I guess if she'd disappeared one day and didn't bother to call for two days I'd be pissed too. Or maybe not. I never was quite sure about what my feelings were regarding Cam. Maybe I'd find out now, to see how she reacts. Because if she didn't want to accept Riley, then she needed to move on from me. Like is said before, nothing is coming in between my daughter and me.

Anyway. I answered her shrieking. "Shit, calm the fuck down," I said quietly, not wanting anyone in the house to hear me. "That's why I'm calling - to tell you what's going on. I had an emergency and had to go-"

"To Maryland, right? Where Tara lives?" she asked nastily, and I wanted to cuss her out because Tara's never done anything to hurt Cam, she had no business being pissed off at Tara. Anyway, moving on.

"Yeah. I'm at Tara's right now. Some shit has gone down that you need to know about, but like I told you before, you can't say shit about this, not to anyone. Are you in agreement here? Because if this leaks somewhere, I'm gonna kick some ass. Okay?"

"Okay. So what's so fucking important that you had to go see her for?" She was still being nasty but she always was about T. She knows how much I loved that girl and she knows that she and I don't come anywhere close to T and me. Too fucking bad for her.

I rubbed my forehead and took a deep breath. "Umm. Look, the thing is … I, umm…" Finally I just blurted it out. "Tara … she had a baby. Our baby, I mean, mine and hers." Whew. There. I felt so much better, until Cam started yelling again.

"She what? She had your fucking baby? How the fuck did that happen? I thought she just dumped you … oh my fucking God," she went on and on, complaining. "Are you fucking kidding me? Were you screwing around on me, you fucker?"

I thought she had a lot of nerve talking about cheating on people considering how we got together in the first place and let her know it. She didn't appreciate it, not one part of my story. I got to where Tara filled me in on Riley yesterday and she interrupted me again. Cam can really curse you out bad. I still think Tara could beat her when she's mad, but Cam has a pretty nasty mouth.

"I fucking cannot believe this shit, Justin. She just told you about your baby now? Why now? Why didn't she tell you before? That's some rotten shit." she finally stopped blabbing again. For some reason, I was finding it harder to deal with Cam when I was around Tara. It's like nothing ever happened in a way; like Cam never came between us or anything.

"She had her reasons." I replied, not wanting to defend Tara but not wanting anyone to talk shit about her either. "Not that I agree but she had some reasons."

"Like what?"

For some reason, I didn't want to tell her. I mean, technically it wasn't any of her fucking business. I never put a concrete name to what we were doing, which was basically fucking around with each other because it got to be convenient. I'm a one-woman guy, straight up. I know that sounds bad because I did cheat on T but I wasn't thinking straight. Drugs got into me or something. I like to be with one girl that I know is clean and safe and better not fuck around over me like Brit did. Cam was there and fit the bill and things just happened. But there wasn't any love shit going on, I can tell you that.

I decided to end the conversation, as I was very tired of it. "Look Cam … I'm staying here for at least the next week. I just found out I'm a fucking father and I'm not leaving my baby yet. I don't know what else to tell you," I said, hoping she'd leave it at that and leave me alone.

Yeah, right.

"Well, can I come and see her? We've been together for a while, Justin. I'm a part of your life now, too," she said, causing me to shudder. Here, here with Tara and my mom and dad and … Sasha? There would for sure be a fucking rumble. While any other time I would've enjoyed watching a brawl like that go down, it wasn't cool if a baby was involved.

Shaking my head and laughing a little, I answered, "I don't think that's a good idea. In fact it's a very bad idea. My mom and dad just got here and we're all staying at the house, so-"

"The house? You're staying with that bitch?" I knew she'd say something like that. And I was ready for her.

"Call me whatever you fucking want but don't say shit about Tara to me, okay? She's my baby's mother and she deserves some fucking respect."

Cam laughed sardonically. "You're fucking defending a woman who didn't even let you know you were a father? I've now officially seen everything under the fucking sun because this shit is un-fucking-believable! Fuck you, Justin. Fuck you and your family! Don't expect me to sit around waiting while you play family either - I'm fucking going home!" she exclaimed. While anyone else would've hung up, she waited, I guess to see what I was going to say, I don't know, because I didn't have shit to say to her so I just sat there listening to her panting until she finally hung up.

Stretching, I got up and went back into Tara's room with a huge weight lifted off of my shoulders. She was done breast-feeding and just lying on her side watching Riley lay next to her, feet and arms in the air as she gurgled cheerfully.

Shit. That scene fucking brought tears to my eyes. That could've been my life, you know? If I hadn't fucked up, I'd be lying right there on the other side of Riley. Fuck it, I thought. That's my daughter and she's gonna fucking know it.

"Can ... can I come in and play with her too?" I asked cautiously. I really didn't want any drama between me and T, so I was walking around her on eggshells. So far it had worked - she never said a bad word about me after our initial argument and tried to help me get to know the baby better. She's such a fucking good mother like I always knew she would be. And to prove my point, she waved me over as nice as can be.

I took my shoes off and climbed up on the big sleigh bed that she had in her room now and the three of us just talked and played. Nothing heavy, just baby talk and what she liked and didn't like, etc. Just learning the baby's routine, you know?

Somehow, the whole experience made me relaxed, and sort of sleepy. T felt the same way too, I could tell by her wavering eyelids. Soon Riley was asleep between the two of us who were knocked out right after she closed her eyes.

While I slept, I dreamed that every day was just like that one.

And I wondered how to make my dream come true in real life. Because I wanted it to. It had to be that way. For Riley. She didn't know it, but she was going to be the reason her mommy and daddy got back together again.

Because I wanted it that way.