Chapter 3

JC sat at the table staring out the darkened window, lighted occasionally by passing cars. He could make out the outlines of trees and other objects. If he focused his eyes, he could see his own reflection.

Focusing, he took in his drawn features; his hair in wild disarray from his shower after the show. The show had been over for a couple hours now, the adrenaline and excitement had dwindled from his body quickly this time. During normal shows it took him awhile to wind down. But this time was different.

As he was up on stage performing, he felt off kilter. He sang like he always did, danced and moved like usual, but there was something amiss. He wasn't as energized like normal. It was like he was just going through the motions and that never happened for him. He loved going on stage and performing in front of a crowd. Every time he was up there, he gave it all he had. He fed off the energy from the crowd; it pushed him; made him want to sing better and dance better.

He knew by the looks the guys sent him during the show or when they were changing outfits they knew something was wrong. He was glad they had to jump on the buses and move to the next town instead of staying in a hotel. Where the guys could corner him. Least now they were divided on two busses. And he was thankful that he was currently on the bus that only housed him and Lance, while the other bus carried Joey, Justin and Chris.

JC blinked his eyes away from the window and looked down at the table. Before him sat the notebook he carried everywhere. It was filled with snippets of lyrics that came to mind. Some turned into full fledge songs while others fizzled at a line or two. But if something came to mind, he wrote it down.

It was opened to one of the beginning pages, where one of the lines he wrote down became a song that was on their latest CD, Celebrity.

"And what am I supposed to do if I can't get over you?

I come to find that you don't feel the same

‘Cause I'm falling, girl I'm falling for you

And I pray you're falling too, I've been falling, falling

Ever since the moment I laid eyes on you"

Those words popped into his head while riding the bus to yet another venue in another state for the ‘No Strings Attached' tour. He had been on the bus with Joey at the time. And Joey had been dating Melissa by then. So not only did Melissa stay on the bus, but Rachel as well.

And during that leg of the tour he and Rachel spent more time together because Melissa and Joey usually holed up in their own little world. So they were left on their own. They watched movies and listened to music. Some nights, they walked deep into the morning hours getting know one another.

It was on one of those particular nights where Rachel was telling a little of what it was like to grow up the granddaughter of a wealthy, influential businessman, daughter of a well-known socialite that the snippet of the eventual song, ‘Falling' entered his brain.

The words echoed over and over in his brain until he finally had to write it down. He made some sort of joke he couldn't remember, but he remembered Rachel smiling at him telling him she didn't mind. She had fallen silent, allowing him to write the words in his head down before they picked the conversation back up.

It was when he wrote those lines that he realized how true they were. How it had snuck up so unexpectedly. And he wondered when she stopped being Lance's little sister's best friend.

"Will you stop thinking," Lance mumbled as he came out from the sleeping area and plopped himself down at the table across from JC. He watched his bandmate stare out the window and he reached out to turn the notebook around so he could read it, immediately recognizing the song.

"Ah," Lance nodded, turning the notebook back around. "I should have made the connection."

"What?"

Lance rolled his eyes, "Don't, it's too early - or late - for that. Whatever it was that has you in this funk. I should have made the connection sooner than this." He waited until JC took his eyes away from the window and looked at him. "The simple solution is to go to the auction and buy her yourself."

JC stared at the younger man, giving nothing away. He wasn't sure if the other band members knew about the feelings he had for Rachel or not. But apparently they did - or at least Lance did. He sighed, slumping against the back of the bench. He ran a hand over his face. "I can't."

Lance watched as JC's face became an open book. The shield dropped and the emotions were there on his face. "For crying out loud, JC; why can't you? How long are you gonna hold this in? Are you ever going to tell her how you feel?"

"I meant I can't not as in I couldn't own up and do it. I meant I can't as in I can't be at the auction because we will be on Larry King the same night."

"Oh," Lance said as he leaned back on the bench. He hadn't realized when the auction was being held. It had been his solution for the auction as well. Have one of the guys (and not necessarily JC) bid on her.

"Yeah, ‘oh'," JC sighed.

"So that explains your funk tonight. Rachel's being auctioned off; Mr. Dorky Looking, the Third, with Grandfather's approval, is going to be bidding to win. You are otherwise previously engaged and can't bid yourself. And if that's not enough, she was summoned back to New York until at least the auction date so she isn't going to be with us, where you can moon over her."

"I don't moon over her."

"You moon," Lance grinned. He pointed down at the notebook forgotten on the table. "You moon and write sappy love songs."

"'Falling' is not about her." JC insisted, snapping the notebook shut.

"Yeah right," Lance laughed. "I don't know why you haven't told her. Do you want me to talk to her? See if she likes you?"

JC rolled his eyes and didn't bother with a response to Lance's teasing.

"Melissa swears Rachel has a crush on someone in the group, but she doesn't know who." Lance broke the silence, minutes later. "She hasn't figured it out yet; Rachel's keeping it very close to the chest. She thinks it's Chris-"

"What!" JC realized too late that he had taken the bait. He gathered up his notebook and started scooting from the bench seat. He wasn't in the mood for teasing tonight.

"No, C, stay," Lance reached out and stopped him. "I'm sorry. Melissa hasn't taken a guess. I think it's you. No honest," he said at JC's look.

"You also have a biased opinion. You know how I feel about her."

"Ah, so you do admit you have feelings for her." Lance grinned.

"I wrote a song about falling in love with her, Lance." The look he gave Lance told Lance he wasn't impressed with his tactics.

"Just trying to get you to admit it. So now that you have," He paused and waited for JC to meet his gaze again. "Tell her! Come on, why won't you tell her?"

"I don't know," JC shrugged, fiddling with the notebook.

"JC," Lance sighed. "Stop keeping everything inside and talk to me."

"I'm worried about her reaction. What is she gonna think, how is she gonna react when I tell her."

"You're not giving her enough credit. She isn't like most of the women we've come across."

"I know that. Trust me; I know she isn't like them. She's different. And that makes telling her that much worse. She isn't like anyone I've ever dated. I didn't feel half of what I felt for them that I feel for Rachel."

"JC, you're such a dork," Lance shook his head, smiling. "You love her."

"Yeah," JC scoffed. "No way I can compete with those vying for her attention at that auction. I don't have a suffix after my name, work for a multi-million dollar company, belong to a country club or vacation overseas."

"You know that doesn't matter to her. If it did, she'd be ecstatic over this auction so she could snag one of those men who do have all those attributes. But you saw her earlier, she's in misery. Trying to figure out anyway possible of getting out of it."

"Then why doesn't she just not go?"

"Unfortunately she's a nice person. And despite infuriating her to no end, she loves her Grandfather. But that doesn't mean she's gonna let the old coot marry her off. I don't think there is anything he can threaten her with that will make her march down the aisle any faster. You probably won't be able to get her out of the auction but there is one thing you can do to make sure she doesn't take the first offer from Mr. Country Club."

"What's that?"

"Tell her!" He stood up from the table ready to collapse back in his bunk. "You're not giving yourself enough credit, JC. Only an idiot would pick a snobby trust fund baby over you." He ruffled JC's hair, causing the man to swat at him. "Who knows, maybe she doesn't realize there is someone else out there who wants her; sees her as Rachel and not the heir to the Weatherly Empire."

"I don't care about her Grandfather's company." JC said truthfully. "That doesn't even factor in when it comes to what I feel for her."

"Good," Lance smiled then broke off as he yawned. "Then tell her. Call her, e-mail her, send a letter, a fax. Write another song and sing it to her. Do something JC."

JC smiled a real smile for the first time that night. "Thanks Lance. I will."