I can not believe that I’m here. I stepped out of a cab and walked into the Ritz hotel in Central Park. Because I technically signed a contract for any time Justin needs me for tour I can’t go on the Usher tour because Justin needs three dancers while he does a week long promo tour in New York. His people say it’s because I know the dance. So do the other seven people that were on tour with him. The seven people who, might I add, did not get offers to go on Usher’s world tour.
When I checked into my hotel room there was a schedule waiting on the table telling me I had to be at rehearsal in a few hours. I fell onto the bed and took a quick nap but of course got up quickly and made myself look good. If Justin’s going to be an ass about this and make me come when he knows I have other things that I should be doing then I’m going to look hot dammit. And I’m not going to hook up with him.
Even though deep down I know that the only reason I’m here is probably because of his management. I’m sure he has nothing to do with them making me come and he couldn’t care less if I was here or not. Although part of me thinks this is his way of saying he doesn’t want me to go on tour with Usher, but that’s probably just wishful thinking.
I made my way down to one of the conference rooms of the hotel where the other dancers were already waiting. Of course Justin wasn’t there yet, but I’m a little nervous to see him again. I sat on the ground, waiting patiently. I do get a little annoyed that everyone has to be here at 4 o’clock and then Justin shows up whenever he wants and everyone has to just sit and wait. He came in a few minutes later and I did my best not to make eye contact with him the whole time we were rehearsing. Although the dance does involve us getting pretty up close and personal.
When we finished I went right back to my room to take a shower. As soon as I got out I noticed there was a message on my phone, “Hey, it’s cool ignore me. Just wanted to see if you wanted to meet up later or something. Let me know. Later” of course it was Justin. Now I’m starting to think he made me come here so he could get laid. I’m not sleeping with him, even though I want to. I need to stand my ground with this. I pressed the delete button and fell down on the bed when I heard the phone ring again. I didn’t even look at it, just ignored the call. It turns out it wasn’t Justin it was just some of the dancers telling me where they were going tonight. I need to go out so I’m not tempted to stay here and hook up with Justin.
I jumped out of the shower and went right to my cell phone to see if I had any missed calls. No Maddie. She was being quite the bitch at rehearsal, granted I did make her come up here when she should be on her way to Europe with Usher. It’s going to be a lame tour anyway; I’m doing her a favor.
If this were a month ago Madison would be in the bed right here next to me. It’s really fucked up that I keep thinking about her. It’s even more fucked up that I brought her all the way up here and she won’t even talk to me. The girls said they’re going out tonight, so I’ll go there and hopefully get her to get things back to normal. I don’t know how, and I know she’s not going to give in but it’s worth a shot.
She didn’t even look at me during rehearsal and if she did it was to give me a dirty look for touching her where I should not have been touching her. It’s a sexy dance and I’ve always given her an extra grab or touch but she never had a problem with it before. I know now we’re not hooking up anymore but I can’t control myself. When she gets close to me I just want to rip her clothes off and get right to it.
When we got to the club Justin was surprisingly already there. First of all I didn’t think he was coming, and then of course the fact that he’s there before everyone else worries me a little. He waved us into the VIP section and even though I wanted to stay away from him I did want to hang out in the VIP area where the drinks are free and I don’t have to worry about creeps trying to buy me drinks. Justin spent the first half of the night just watching me. He never said anything to me, but I noticed his eyes on me all night.
I ended up meeting a guy that was pretty good hook up material. I haven’t really found random guys to hook up with in a long time, especially since I’m turning over this new leaf about being more mature and looking out for my future. But the truth is that I was feeling him and Justin was there watching so I wanted to make him jealous. I grabbed onto this new guy’s hand and pulled him out of the club as we made our way back to the hotel a few blocks away.
“What is it that you do?” he asked
“I’m a dancer” I said quickly pulling him along with me
“That’s cool”
“Yeah” I hate that all these guys think they have to talk. I kissed him quickly and he finally started to walk a little faster.
We stepped onto the elevator and just as the door was closing I heard, “Hold the elevator” I knew it was Justin and I wanted more than anything for those elevator doors to close but this kid whose name I don’t even know decided to let him in, “Thanks bro” Justin said as he pulled a red head in with him. She giggled, I’m pretty sure she doesn’t speak. She doesn’t need to speak she’s one of those girls that guys like because she’s hot and doesn’t talk.
Justin gave me a look; a slight smile and I just ignored him and decided to make out with whats-his-name instead. It got pretty hot and heavy and then I could see Justin and the red headed slut making out from the corner of my eye. Finally the door opened and we made our way to the room while still remaining attached at the lips. So did Justin and the whore. It was kind of like we were trying to one up each other.
I opened the door and fell onto the bed with what’s-his-name continuing the make out session and then quickly undressing each other. As I sat on top of him, straddling his waist I realized for the first time what I was doing. The only reason why I’m ready to have sex with this guy right now is because Justin is in the other room having sex with the red headed whore, “Are you alright?”
I shook my head and crawled off of him, “I’m sorry, I can’t do this”
“What?”
“I know, I’m really sorry” I said as I pulled my clothes back on, “You can like… stay for a little and… take care… of yourself or whatever, I’m sorry” I grabbed a sweatshirt and made my way outside to the balcony down the hall.
Maddie is definitely doing that to get to me. And it’s working, why is it working? Why do I care about this girl? It was supposed to be a booty call relationship. Why isn’t it that anymore? I looked at the girl standing in front of me and took a deep breath. She is really pretty but why do I not care? “I have to go, sorry” I said as I grabbed my key and a sweatshirt and got out of the room. I probably shouldn’t have left her alone in my room with all my things.
I walked to the balcony down the hall and saw Maddie sitting out there hugging her legs. The fact that she is out here and not inside having sex with that loser is a good sign. Or is it? It’s a good sign that’s she’s not having sex but I can tell by the way she’s sitting she is not happy. And I think it’s safe to say I am the reason why she’s so pissed off. I should go out there to talk to her but it looks like she wants to just spend some time on her own. Although I did bring her up here and we should talk this shit through. Since when is having sex with no strings attached so fucking difficult?
Author's Chapter Notes:
Thank you all so much for reading...
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