Author's Chapter Notes:
Ok, here’s the last chapter :( Thank you all so much for reading and the feedback. I never expected to get so many reviews and it really makes writing so much easier. I’m sad for it to end. Thanks again and please let me know what you think.
After standing at the balcony watching Madison I decided I had to go out there and talk to her. When I opened the door she looked at me and then back to the view, ignoring me completely. I sat down next to her, “Hey” she didn’t say anything, “Are you ignoring me?”
“Yes” she answered softly
“Why?”
“Why am I here?” she glared at me for the first time, “Why did you make me come here?”
“What are you talking about?”
“You know I had the tour with Usher”
“You signed a contract”
“A contract that seven other people signed who have nothing to do” she paused before speaking again even louder, “Why did you make me come?”
“I don’t have a say with that shit”
“Whatever” she took a deep breath
“Why did you come if you didn’t want to?”
“Because I signed a contract and I don’t want to get sued for everything I own”
“It’s an easy contract to get out of” she can pretend that she has me figured out all she wants but I know that she wants to be here or she wouldn’t be here.
“This information would have been more helpful last week” I didn’t respond to that. I just sat out there looking at the stars. She said something but I wasn’t even listening, I was completely zoned out
“What’s that?”
“I was kind of enjoying my alone time out here”
That’s her way of telling me she wants me to leave. Too bad I’m not leaving, “I was looking forward to enjoying my alone time out here as well”
“I was here first”
I let out a sigh, “I don’t care. If it weren’t for me we wouldn’t even be here”
“Exactly”
“I’m not leaving. If you want your alone time so bad then go back to your room”
“I can’t”
“Did you lose your key?”
“No, I did not loose my key” she said getting defensive
“Why can’t you go in your room?”
“What’s-his-face might still be there” she said softly, “I don’t want to walk in on him doing whatever the hell it is he’s doing” I let a chuckle escape, “It’s not funny”
“It is” I laughed, “You could come to my room”
“I’m not having sex with you”
All right then. Just come right out and say it, “I didn’t mean to have sex”
“Yes you did”
I took a deep breath and looked into the sky again, “When does the Usher tour start?”
“Tuesday”
“If you want to go, go. We’ll get one of the other girls to come” I noticed her looking at me but I ignored it and continued looking into space. It’s stupid that I’m ruining her life just because I’m an asshole and I want her to stay around me. Maybe if I treated her the way she should be treated she would want to stay around me.
“It’s too late”
“No it’s not, it’s only Sunday”
“They got someone new”
“So what? Let me get my phone I’ll call Scott. He choreographed for us before, we’re friends” she didn’t say anything; she didn’t jump at the opportunity. I think part of her wants to stay here. I think she’s hoping maybe I won’t be a complete jackass. We have had some great times and a lot of fun and it’s actually possible for us to be together in a normal relationship, “Do you want me to call him?” she shook her head, “Why not?”
“It’s not fair”
I laughed, “There is no fair in the world of dancers” she pulled the hood up over her head, “So you don’t want me to call?”
“No”
“Because you want to stay here with me” Justin said confidently. I looked over at him to see a smug smile on his face and rolled my eyes, “Admit it”
“No” even if deep down I want to stay the only reason why is because I also want him to want me to stay. I don’t know why I think it will get better. Honestly, I know that it’s not going to. I know that the best thing that will happen is we’ll hook up again and go back to the way things were. Although I did love it while it was happening I need more now. I can’t just be his booty call girl forever
“Not even a little bit?” he laughed, “Maddie come on, admit that you want to stay here”
“Not until you admit that you want me to stay here” I stood up and walked over to the railing to get away from what I just said. He’s probably going to tell me that he doesn’t want me to stay. He’s told me he doesn’t want me to stay before, he told me he doesn’t care about me. How many times does he have to tell me before it sinks in?
I felt Justin’s arms behind me and he leaned up and whispered into my ear, “I want you to stay”
“Why? Because you like to have sex with me?”
“Yeah” he moved next to me but kept his arm around my waist, “And because I like to hang out with you and talk to you. And I like to fight with you” he chuckled, “No, I love fighting with you. I love that you say what you think and you don’t just sit there and take shit from anybody. And how you act like you don’t give a fuck and you’re so hard but deep down…” he turned me around and put his lips an inch from mine, “deep down you’re actually gentle and sweet” he kissed me passionately and I felt my knees go weak “Stay” he whispered. I didn’t say anything because he caught me off guard, did he really just admit that he wants me to stay? “Please?”
“Are you just saying this to get what you want?”
“What I want is for you to stay”
I licked my lips, he really does seem sincere and usually I don’t fall for his bullshit, “Ok, so say I stay. Then what?”
“Then we work it out”
“How?” she really is not letting me off easy.
I took a deep breath, “I don’t know baby, but I’m willing to try”
“How do I know you’re not going to just try for a few weeks and then everything’s going to go back to the way it always has been? And as soon as you see someone you know you’re going to be ashamed of me and hide me away”
Shit. She thinks I’m ashamed of her, “I’m not ashamed of you”
“Since when?” she crossed her arms over her chest and put her back towards me
“Since ever, are you kidding? You really think I’m ashamed of you?”
“You hide me away when your friends come”
“Because I don’t want people to start shit. You know those dancers are fucking gossip queens they’d start shit if they knew we were together. They’d give you a hard time, I don’t want that, it’s not fair”
“They already knew,” she said softly
“Who?”
“Everyone” what?
“How did they know?”
“We weren’t as good at hiding it as we thought. They’d come looking and everyone would be around except the two of us. And then when you picked me up on the stage the first night”
Fuck. I knew it. As soon as I did it I knew that was going to ruin everything, “Were they giving you a hard time?”
“Some more than others”
“Who?” I will personally have a talk with that fucker and kick their ass off the tour
“It’s not a big deal, I’m not going to tell you” she paused, “We’re getting off topic”
I nodded my head and wrapped my arms around her, “You’ll know because I’m really, truly trying here. I’ll tell the fucking world Madison. I need to be with you. The last few weeks have been the worst of my life. I can’t go months without you. I’m moping around, I don’t mope. I don’t know what the fuck it is that you do to me, but I need you to stay. It’s so far beyond me wanting you to stay, I need it” she still was just looking at me, “You make me realize how fucked up I really am. And you call me out on it; no one has ever called me out on it. Everyone just deals with my shit but you don’t. And it’s not like me to be such an asshole but I can get away with it. And I can’t with you. Please Madison, I need you to stay. We’ll hold hands in public, and hang out. I’ll eat your fucking pizza at nine o’clock in the morning and grilled cheese with yellow cheese”
“It’s white” she finally said something
“It’s yellow” I corrected her, “But we’ll move on”
“No, it’s white. I swear to god Sexy, I will take you to the market and you’ll see”
I laughed as I held her tightly, “I will call it white for the rest of my life if it will get you to stay”
“And it’s not going to be fuck buddies?”
“Nope. You’ll be my girlfriend and I’ll be your boyfriend” I saw a slight smile trying to cover her face, “No more fucking, just love making”
She laughed and slapped my arm, “Shut up, you’re a complete nerd”
“I’ll take that. Am I complete nerd with a girlfriend or what?” she bit her bottom lip again and it was driving me crazy, “Fuck Madison. Stop playing so hard to get. You know you want me”
“Oh, I know I want you?”
“Yeah” I said as I stepped back, “How could you not want this?” I asked as I pointed to my body
She walked closer, “It’s not this I’m worried about” she ran her hands down my body, “It’s this” she tapped my head, “And this” she tapped my heart.
I held my hands over my heart, “It’s yours baby”
She took deep breath, “Alright”
“Alright?” she says it like she’s giving in, “Alright? You do wonders for my self esteem Madison”
She smiled as she walked over to me and gave me the best kiss I’ve ever had in my life, I almost fell over, “Does that help your self esteem Sexy?” she asked with a smile
“Yeah” I couldn’t even speak, it took me a few seconds to be able to talk again. I pulled her into a tight hug, “Yeah, my self esteem is way up there now”
“Good” she giggled, “I’m glad I could help”
We went back to the room and I just held onto her. I’ve learned my lesson. I can’t treat her like shit because she will leave. She shouldn’t be treated like that, and I can’t let her get away from me again. I know it’s going to be hard and we’re going to have fights… hell it’s what we do best. But we’ll make it work. I know we will.
I kissed the back of her neck when I was sure she was sleeping and whispered, “Thanks Maddie”
She rolled over so her face was an inch away from mine, our legs intertwined and our heads sharing a pillow, “Thank you Sexy” she whispered back before kissing my forehead and closing her eyes. I’ve never seen her look so relaxed and I’ve never felt so relaxed myself. I closed my eyes, we got this.
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