“Never been burned by a beautiful boy. I always had myself a couple little toys. None of them matter when you’re lying next to me. You know you shook me like a baby in a tree.” – Beautiful Boy

JC stood in the hallway in the ICU. He held a now cooling cup of coffee in his hand. The doctor had instructed he wait out in the hallway for a few moments. JC definitely felt out of place. He was tempted to turn around and just leave. He had no business being here. He was nobody to Justin anymore. He wasn’t even an after thought to him.

Looking around the lobby a moment, he noticed Justin’s mom asleep on one of the couches. She had a worn quilt over her, and it made him smile for recognizing the quilt.

“Oh hey so you did come.” A female voice questioned towards him. He turned to be met with a pair of green eyes. Her hair was up in a messy bun and she wore no sign of make up at all on her face. Luckily she didn’t need it. It wasn’t her appearance though that JC was staring at. It was her swollen stomach as she moved her hand over it in a protective way.

“How far are you now?” JC asked dryly.

His question perked a smile from her. “ 28 weeks. It’s getting there. I’m so exhausted, it’s been so stressful these past couple of months.” She touched at her face before looking over towards the room where Justin was in. “You know I was shocked when the doctor suggested you be the first one to see him. It’s hard…” She pouted a bit and JC watched as her bottom lip quivered and her eyes glazed over with tears waiting to spill out. “I just want to go in there and hug him… tell him it’s a girl.” She sniffled. “But he doesn’t know who I am… he doesn’t remember meeting me. The doctor said he tried to explain to him but it was only confusing him.” She wiped at her eyes and pulled out a tissue from her purse.

“I’m sorry Jess…” JC truly apologized. He may have not cared much for Justin but he still felt terrible for what Jessica was going through.

“It’s okay. I’ll be okay. My mom has been staying with me and so has Justin’s mom. I’m well taken care of.” She gave him a reassuring smile.

Before JC could respond, Doctor Clements came out of the room and made his way over to him. “Mr. Chasez, glad you could make it. Come with me and we’ll talk briefly.”

JC gave Jessica a reassuring squeeze to her shoulder before walking a few feet away with the doctor.

“Doctor Clements I don’t know if I can do this.” JC admitted, rubbing the back of his neck. He had wanted to show up for his own spitefulness. His intentions weren’t pure, but seeing Jess so pregnant and genuinely distraught made JC feel guilty for even thinking such things. Maybe holding a grudge for so long was silly.

“I know you are hesitant. Let me just explain to you quickly what has happened. Justin suffered many injuries from the accident. He is still recovering from a broken leg and collarbone. When he was brought to me in the ER that day, he died on my table; luckily we were able to bring him back. He was only awake momentarily before falling into the coma. I had warned Mrs. Timberlake that if he came out of it, that the possibility of him returning to his normal self was rare. Unfortunately I was correct in that prediction. You see he is showing signs of temporary amnesia. His more recent memories are just not there, and the last event he can recall is one with you Mr. Chasez.” Doctor Clements looked at JC expectantly.

“Look doctor Justin and I we…were not on good terms. What if I go in there and he remembers and it sets him off? Shouldn’t his wife or…” JC rubbed the back of his neck in a nervous way.

“I know this is difficult. It’s like I told you on the phone. It is a sensitive case. Lets just try it shall we? If you put too much new information onto a patient suffering from this it can really upset them and confuse them. It’s best to let them see something familiar to what they think is a recent memory.” He encouraged.

JC pressed his lips together and kept his gaze on the door to Justin’s room. He would be lying if he said he wasn’t nervous. He was completely shot with nerves and anxiety. “Just for a few minutes…” He replied quietly.

“As long as you’d like.” Doctor Clements agreed before opening the door to Justin’s room.

JC hesitated in the doorway for a moment before inhaling a breath and then stepping fully into Justin’s room.

----------------------FLASHBACK 7 YEARS EARLIER-----------------

“I really suck at this.” Justin laughed, making a sour face as his fingers clumsily danced over the ivories of the piano. JC was patient though, and he smiled as he sat next to Justin on the bench.

“No it’s okay it’s going to take a lot of practice.” JC encouraged, setting his glass of Riesling down on top of the closed piano. He scooted closer to Justin’s body and then cracked his neck before placing his own fingers over the keys.

Justin watched JC as he skillfully moved his fingers over the ivories. It was effortless to him and Justin couldn’t help but find himself feeling a bit jealous and impatient. “You’re so talented…” He sighed and then took JC’s glass off the piano and placed it to his lips.

“So are you Justin. You’ll get it soon then you’ll probably be an even better pianist than me.” He responded with a laugh before playing the opening chords to Moonlight Sonata.

Justin kept his eyes fixated on JC’s profile. The way he kept his lips parted just a bit as he played, how his head would tilt back and his eyes would close. He set the half empty glass aside and then scooted even closer to him. Their shoulders touched and JC paused in his playing to look Justin directly in the eyes. “What is it?” He asked quietly, directing his attention onto Justin’s lips.

“JC…I’m so completely in love with you.” Justin confessed. His hand moved over JC’s thigh and he gave it a reassuring squeeze before touching his face with his other hand. “Everything about you… it’s addicting.”

JC felt his cheeks burn with both flattery and a bit of embarrassment. He and Justin had been together for over a year now, but had known each other for over a decade. Their relationship was very much on the down low but still the world was changing and being with another man wasn’t much of a big deal as it once was before.

“I’m in love with you too.” JC replied shyly. Much to his surprise Justin widened his smile and then pulled the older man in for a kiss. It was a heated one, and somehow JC ended up pinned against the piano, his body making contact with the keys and causing it to make an unpleasant tone.

“I wanna have you right here like this…” Justin admitted as he pulled off his t-shirt. JC was hesitant at first. He was all for sex in every room but somehow they had managed to keep his baby grand piano out of the mix.

“Just be careful…” JC warned. He rarely denied Justin of much. He had been infatuated with him for so long, and then to have the infatuation turn into so much more was enough to make JC want to spoil Justin in any way he could.

More clothing came off and kisses expanded to other body parts as the two continued to tangle themselves in each other.

Justin’s eyes were filled with lust and excitement. He was only 26 and held a lot of stamina. His fingers worked JC’s jeans free and he more than happily kicked them to the side for him. JC placed his hands on Justin’s bare shoulders as he slowly eased himself to hoover over the younger man. He took a moment to admire Justin as he raked his fingers through the short curls on top of his head.

“I think all of our piano lessons should end with me fucking you.” Justin smirked, before easing JC down on to him. They both inhaled a breath before adjusting and then setting the pace.

It was definitely one of the best sex sessions they had. It was something new for them. JC’s piano had now been tainted like all the rest of the furniture in his house.

The sun began to rise over the horizon just as the two of them let out their releases. It really was a perfect and memorable moment.

JC rested his forehead in the crook of Justin’s neck as they caught their breath. He felt Justin carefully lift his head up to make eye contact with him. “I meant what I said.”

“I know you did. So did I.” JC tried to get off his lap, but Justin quickly held him in place and prevented him from doing so.

“Who said I was done?” He cocked his eyebrow in a challenging way.

“Oh we’re going for round two?” JC laughed, but slowly let his expression go somber when he realized Justin had a very concentrated look on his face. “What is it?” He encouraged.

Justin was quiet and didn’t answer JC’s question. He was working up courage inside of him. He knew it would be risky and hard to keep under wraps for a while but he was willing to take the risk. Nobody else deserved JC the way he did and he wanted to make sure no one ever did.

“Marry me.” He more so demanded than question.

JC widened both eyes before blinking them in bewilderment. He wasn’t sure he had heard Justin right. “Do what?”

“Marry me. Be with me…” He urged, moving his hands over JC’s sides.

“You’re serious?” JC looked Justin in the eyes. He searched for a trace of uncertainty or something that told him he was just fucking with him, but he found none of that.

“It can be done quietly… the public won’t figure it out for a long time. We can disappear for a few months… just you and me.” Justin kissed JC on the neck, making a trail up to his earlobe.

“Justin I… are you sure?” JC wasn’t hesitant because he didn’t want to marry Justin. He was hesitant because he knew how adored and loved Justin was. He was already fading into the shadows in Hollywood while Justin continued to shine.

“Very. So what do you say? Do me the honors?” He began to rock his body against JC’s again, feeling his arousal start to grow once more as he did so. Round two was definitely up soon.

“Yeah. Yeah of course…Of course I will.”

----------------------END OF FLASHBACK--------------------------

JC stood at the foot of Justin’s hospital bed. His eyes landing on the white cast that covered his right foot. He looked peaceful with his eyes closed and the oxygen tubes in his nose. The machines next to him beeped and hummed. It had been so long since he looked at this man in person. 3 years didn’t seem like much but when you had been used to seeing someone every day before it seemed like a very long time.

Justin’s hair was longer, and the beard on his face was not something JC was used to seeing him with. He didn’t look innocent anymore. He had aged and lost all signs of the baby face he once possessed. Gone was the young revitalizing 26year old that had asked him to marry him over 7 years ago. In his place lay a bearded 33year old man, who looked far from vibrant.

JC hesitantly extended his hand out to Justin’s head. He watched his hand shake as it carefully made contact with the other mans hair. It was still soft and wavy. The curls were gone but the wave was still there. He looked his face over and noted the small wrinkles and crease in his forehead. His nose and lips still the same though.

He was about to touch the apple of Justin’s cheek until he opened his eyes and looked up at him. JC froze up, his fingers still in Justin’s hair. His eyes still the same too, blue and beautiful.

“JC?” Justin questioned in a quiet hoarse voice. He swallowed and then tried to sit up making a pained face and touching near his collarbone. “What the fuck…” He groaned, not realizing the condition his body was in. “Get this shit off me…” Justin demanded, pulling the oxygen tubes off his face and tossing it to the side. “Get me out of this bed…” His eyes were a bit wild as he was about to attempt to pull his IV out.

“Hey no calm down… it’s ok.” JC put a hand over Justin’s stopping him from ripping anything else out. Their eyes met and Justin’s features softened instantly. JC watched as something happened. It was almost like turning a switch on and off. Justin slowly smiled at JC, grabbing his hand and willingly squeezing it.

“I didn’t think you were gonna come. I told that Doc to tell you to come get me. I wanna go home. I miss our bed…” Justin sighed, touching the top of his head.

JC wasn’t even sure what had just happened. One minute he was freaking out and the next he was calm and seemed to be aware of what was going on.

“Our bed?” JC questioned, still confused, but even more so intrigued.

“Yeah…our bed…in our house. We just bought it like last month remember?” Justin gave him an expectant look.

JC was rendered speechless. He didn’t know how to respond. Justin was recalling something that happened in the summer of 2008. He wasn’t sure what to do. He didn’t want to trigger anything that would make him freak out again. He decided to play along.

“I…I know that. Ha… I was just kidding you know. It’s still weird to think of things as ‘ours.’” JC stole a glance towards the window. He felt ashamed for playing such a game but the Doctor did warn him, he just didn’t mention if he should play along or not.

Justin toyed with the name bracelet on his wrist a moment. “I like it though. I like that things are ours. You’re acting weird. I know I got in this accident and I can’t remember how it happened…” He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.

“A motorcyclist was trying to pass you. You wanted to teach him a lesson for being a reckless driver so you didn’t let him. The road curved and you were going pretty fast, the asshole motorcyclist finally passed you and you almost hit him and when you tried to avoid it you lost control of the steering wheel during the curve. Your car went off the road and down a hill, it rolled three times and threw you out the front window.” Lynn had repeated the story to JC when she’d called him. The motorcyclist confessed everything.

Justin stared at JC bug eyed and in complete shock. “I..I don’t remember.” He confessed, rubbing at his temples a bit. “Can we please just get the fuck out of here C? “ Justin pleaded.

JC touched his hand in an affectionate way. He felt the sudden flip in his stomach when he did so. This was very bad.

“I’m going to go talk to the doctor. See if he can draw up your release papers so we can go home.” He gave Justin a reassuring look before making his way over towards the door.

“JC wait!” Justin called out, and motioned for him to come back over to him. “You’re just gonna leave me like this without giving me some love?”

“No, I mean… sorry just anxious to get you out of this place.” He slowly made his way back over to Justin.

“That makes two of us.” Once JC was close enough, Justin shamelessly gripped the other mans shirt and pulled him down towards him. Before JC could object to much, he felt the warm familiar sensation of Justin’s lips against his.

His body tingled all the way down to his toes. It was familiar and almost satisfying. It had been years and years and yet it felt like it had only been yesterday.

JC was definitely digging his grave deeper and deeper. He broke the kiss and watched as Justin gave him a satisfied smile.

“Wait till I get better…” He teased with a wink.

“I’m looking forward to it.” JC confessed, and then quickly pressed his lips together. He had to get out of that room. “I’ll be back… sit tight.” He instructed before finally stepping out into the hallway.

He took a minute to collect himself and try to process what the hell had just happened.

“What the hell am I doing?!” He whisper yelled as he began to pace.

“Mr. Chasez! There you are. Was it a success? Did he recall who you were?” Doctor Clements questioned while holding a file folder in his hand, ready to jot down whatever JC confessed to.

“I can NOT do this doctor Clements. He freaked out for like a second and then all of a sudden whoosh he was all chatty and fine. He… he thinks we are still together.” He confessed in a hushed tone.

Doctor Clements scribbled frantically into the file. “Yes I know. He thinks you are married?” He gave JC a coy smile causing the other male to glare at him in irritation.

“It’s not right. I have to tell him the truth, about Jess and the baby… about how he and I..” JC trailed off when Doctor Clements shook his head no.

“Mr. Chasez I know we have to work on triggering his memory again. It has to be done subtly and day by day. Anything that’s ‘off’ to him can cause him to go into a panic. Slowly take it day by day and mention one current even that has happened for him daily.”

JC couldn’t help but believe that this whack job doc was suggesting that ‘he’ be the one to do all these things. “Wait what are you saying? You want me to keep playing along with him? Take him home with me? I can’t none of his things are there… he’s going to take one look around and freak out.”

“Then put some of his items back in your home. This is only temporary. I predict in a week or two he will become more self aware of things.” Doctor Clements scribbled down a script on his prescription pad. “Here… get him the alprazolam for his anxiety and panic attacks and the vicodin for his pain.” He handed JC the piece of paper.

“Look I need to go talk to his family… and figure out if they’re cool with all this. Then I need to set it up so it looks like he still lives there. This is asking a whole lot here.” JC was beginning to get impatient. As much as he wanted Justin to get better, he was also afraid of having him stay with him again, even if it was supposedly short term.

“I’ll schedule him for discharge in the morning. In the meantime take the necessary steps needed. You’ll be glad you did so once he remembers things again.” Doctor Clements patted JC on the back before taking his file folder down the hallway.

Would he really be glad? JC wasn’t even sure how he was going to pull this off. He knew he needed Jessica’s full support and help though. She was also going to be the one who had to supply him with Justin’s things to plant in his home.

JC was beginning to feel sick with nerves. It was one thing to see Justin again after so long, it was another to have him completely have the last 7 years erased from his memory and royally mind fuck JC.

Letting out a long breath of air, JC looked the prescription over once before shoving it into his pocket. He would go inform Justin that he had to spend one more night in the hospital and then he would have to get Jess to let him pick up some of Justin’s things. It was insane and outrageous to even be doing, but for some reason it made JC smile.