To call their rise to stardom meteoric, after the Disney Channel aired the concert special, would’ve been an understatement. According to JC the album wasn’t doing all that well before, but two weeks after that, it shot up right into the Top 10 on the Billboard charts and stayed there. And suddenly they were everywhere. 

By mid 1998 we were fully into the email thing and our correspondence was quicker. I still received some handwritten letters, though, and with time these were always my favorite. Email was used to catch each other up on daily occurrences and mundane things. The letters were always full of wonderful thoughts, lyrics and just things that were more personal for both of us. These would also come loaded with pictures or videos from their shows, little things that reminded us of each other. I usually sprayed a little perfume on mine so he wouldn’t forget my smell. 

I had secured a job at the campus Library, which provided me with a dial-up internet connection to be used whenever I wanted during my shifts. This allowed me to chat with JC whenever we would coincide in schedule to spend some time in front of the computer, which was a lot harder on his end. 

They began touring in June, all the way through september. Sometimes 2, 3 shows back to back. A little break in October and then back to it. They spent weeks on end on that tour bus. The times they had time to stop at a hotel were the times where I would get to chat a little on line, or I’d get a phone call. I imagined living so far away really didn’t make any difference, he still didn’t get to see his family all that much, or that “girlfriend” of his, who only popped up for big shows and big appearances. We hardly ever talked about our partners, but sometimes they came up in conversations and I hated it. 

I had started dating, too. I had actually been seeing this guy for almost 4 months now and it was starting to become serious. He didn’t know about JC, I assumed JC’s girlfriend didn’t know about me. There was nothing to know anyway. We had spent a week together in a far away land months and months ago, after having had a “fling” many more months ago. 

Yes, I was in love with him, and I felt like an idiot everyday because of it. So I decided the best way to get over someone… was to keep in constant contact with them and dream about the next time we would see each other. It was not my finest moment, but I wasn’t ready to throw in the towel, not yet. And it seemed he felt the same way. He was always the one to call, in part because he was moving around the US all the time. But he was also the one that kept sending emails and letters even if I let one or two go unanswered. It seemed like the minute I decided to try and let him go he would pop up and reel me back in. Into whatever it was we had. 

It had been a busy day at the library, I had been running around for almost two hours with all the kids in a frenzy with spring break two weeks away and midterms nearing. I walked into the little office in the back, where two books lay in front of my notepad, an empty notepad, for I was yet to have a little time to do some studying of my own. The afternoon rush seemed to be slowing down and there were only a couple of students scattered around the tables in the first floor. I had made my rounds on the second floor and checked the private cubicles for forgotten books to be rearranged, everything was in check. I sat down at the desk and prepared to dig into the fascinating world of biochemistry when the little ring came from the computer. 

JScott76 (18:45): Hey pretty girl

My heart started racing. Biochemistry be damned. I put the notepad on the book, closed the book and pushed it off the desk onto a chair. 

I sat close to the screen, my hands fast on the keyboard but stopped myself from replying too quickly. I needed to calm down. 

JScott76 (18:47): Are you there, honey?

I took a deep breath and tried to pull it together. “Every time Kiki? really?” I whispered to myself. 

PrettyGrl79 (18:48): Hi babe. 

JScott76 (18:48): So glad I caught you. I know you’re busy with midterms. 

PrettyGrl79 (18:48): Yah, just sitting down to study a little right now. 

JScott76 (18.49): Great… won’t keep you long then. Just wanted to wish you luck. We are just settling in the hotel, the show last night was awesome. We’ve been doing radio stuff all day. Finally get to sleep in a bed tonight. 

PrettyGrl76 (18:50): You’re not keeping me. I love hearing from you. 

PrettyGrl76 (18:50): Your SN always makes me laugh, mine is just ridiculous.

JScott76 (18:51): Hey! I hand picked that out for you. Well, Tyler helped me :)

PrettyGrl79 (18:51): yeah it’s a good thing you are the only one I ever use it with, it’s embarrassing. 

JScott76 (18:52): You are a girl, and you are pretty. What’s the problem? 

I smiled and bit my lip. Ever the charmer that man. 

JScott76 (18:54): How’s things? Too stressed about exams?

PrettyGrl79 (18:54): Not yet. Biochem is the day after tomorrow, not too worried. Anatomy is the one that’ll kick my ass. But then comes vacation in the Mayan Riviera so that’s something to look forward to. 

I tapped my fingers on the table. We hadn’t been able to plan to see each other because of the tour scheduling being so hectic. So I went ahead and planned a trip to Cancun with my friends and my sister’s friends. I felt ridiculous being disappointed about spending a week on white sandy beaches at an all inclusive resort just because I was bummed about not seeing him.  

JScott76 (18:56): Yeah, you’ll be there from Monday to Saturday, right? 

PrettyGrl79 (18:56): yep

JScott76 (18:57): Cool, you’ll have a blast. 

Would be a lot better if you were there… I started typing, stopped and then deleted the message. 

JScott76 (19:00): Soooooo, MTV called…

JScott76 (19:01): They offered us a hosting gig aboard a cruise through the bahamas. For some kind of spring break thing they’re doing. 

PrettyGrl76 (19:03): Very cool. You guys could use some sun. 

JScott76(19:04): Yeah it’s gonna be kinda rushed, though. We need to be in and out in 2 or 3 days and then back on tour. So it’s either that or… 

I stared at the computer waiting for him to finish his thought. He always took forever to get one thought out, it was unnerving and totally adorable. I could picture him deleting and rewriting everything with his tongue sticking out of the corner of his mouth like he did every time he was concentrating. 

JScott76(19:08) A performance and a hosting gig in Cancun. 

My heart skipped a beat. 

JScott76 (19:08): Guess which one I begged Johnny to book for us? :) 

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I opened the curtain in our room to let the sunlight in. I squinted my eyes as the sun hurt them. My sister groaned and pulled a pillow to her face. The party went well into dawn last night. I had turned in a little earlier. I didn’t want to be hung over today. Today JC was coming and I wanted to be fresh and ready. They’d be leaving in two days, and they were booked most of the time they’d be here and then they’d be rushed back to continue on with their tour. 

I eyed the clock on the nightstand, two hours until he got here. My heart raced a little. 

They landed at noon and were quickly raced to the venue for tomorrow’s performance. We were supposed to meet there. I got there a little after 1. I could feel everything was different from the last time I had been around the guys. I stepped off the taxi and could already see their security personnel outside the venue. It was a gorgeous setting right on the beach, with a big stage and runways leading up to it. I couldn’t get two steps close to the entrance before I was stopped by a huge man with sunglasses. I informed him Mr. Chasez was expecting me and told him my name. He said some kind of code name into his headpiece and simply nodded to me and stepped out of the way. I walked towards the music and saw them on the stage. I hung back and took in the performance. They were only doing soundcheck but gave it their all, even after having played 5 shows in the last week. My eyes never left JC, he was captivating when he was onstage. He saw me from afar and smiled wide, not missing one step, not missing one note. A warm feeling overpowered me.  He didn’t break eye contact until they finished the song. 

I saw them huddle up in the middle of the stage, the choreographer in the middle, giving pointers and nodding. Shortly after, they were dismissed. I remained standing where I had been watching him, arms crossed, even though all I wanted to do was run to him, put my arms around him  and never let him go. He walked slowly towards me, playing with the cap of the water bottle in his hands, with a flirtatious smile on his handsome face. I instinctively bit my lower lip, which made him smile even wider. 

He stopped when he was really close to me, towering over me. I could smell the cologne mixed in with the sweat and the salty ocean air. I couldn’t help it and just swung  my arms around him, locked my fingers behind his head and pulled his face to mine, drowning the loud chuckle from his mouth with my lips. 

Time spent with them as a group was always refreshing. They were fun, energetic, laidback, super funny. This time Chris and Joey had their girlfriends with them. We went for lunch and a couple drinks after. And then JC and I stealthily broke off from the group and went back to JC’s suite. 

You know how when you remember things sometimes your memories tend to be exaggerated? Like there is no way the real thing lives up to the memory?  Well, everything about being with JC was better than the memory. His kisses were ravenous yet tender, his touch stirred something in me that had been dormant, his scent aroused every one of my senses. I was enraptured in him and I didn’t want it to end. 

As I lay on top of him, both my hands rested on his chest, my chin on top of my hands, looking up at him, he stared at me lovingly, with a smile upon his face while he twisted a strand of my hair around one of his fingers. 

He took a deep breath, “I missed this,” he said. 

My gaze fell down to the bed. “A naked girl on top of you after sex?” I replied. I could hear the next words coming out of my mind and I did everything in my power to hold them back but I blurted them out like an idiot. “I somehow doubt that’s something that doesn’t happen often for you.” I felt him stiffen under my weight. I closed my eyes tight and huffed silently instantly regretting what I’ve said. 

He grabbed me by the arms and flipped me on my back, pinning me on the bed. His weight now on me. 

“Hey,” he said, as I opened one of my eyes to look at him. “I meant having a naked YOU on top of me, after making love to YOU.” he said, his eyes wide and serious. 

“I’m sorry,” I said, now both eyes open, glaring back at him. “I know, I’m sorry. I just can't help thinking about you and… you know, it’s hard.”

He sighed and loosened his grip on me, still laying on top of me. “I know. It’s hard for me, too. I think about you and… you know, from time to time and it kills me.” He grabbed my face with one of his hands and caressed my cheek with his thumb. “But I’m here with you right now, I choose to be here with YOU,” he searched for my eyes with his gaze as he added: “I’m in love with YOU.” My heart stopped as I held in a breath. 

“You are?” I managed to whisper, my voice breaking. 

“I should’ve said it in Germany, when I saw you walking away from me. I should’ve said it last year when you came to see me, I should’ve said it yesterday the second I saw you. I love you. I felt it then, I feel it now.” 

I put my hands around his neck and smiled wide. “I love you, too,” and pulled him softly to me until our mouths collided. 

I fell asleep snuggled up to him completely exhausted and satisfied. But woke up alone a couple hours later. My stomach was growling, my mouth parched. I searched for JC around the room but he was nowhere in sight. Suddenly I felt a breeze coming from the open balcony door, the curtains blowing in the currents of air. I wrapped a sheet around me and stepped on the balcony smiling as the ocean’s breeze hit me in the face with a salty aroma. JC was bent over the railing, looking at the setting sun. 

I walked up to him and kissed his bare shoulder. 

“Hey,” he whispered, opened one arm and pulled me close to his body, kissing the top of my head. His eyes were narrow, he seemed troubled. 

“What’s wrong?” I asked, as part of me feared something had irreparably been damaged with what had been said a couple hours ago. 

“Remember when I told you I had gone back home a couple months back for dad’s birthday and my uncle the lawyer had asked me why that song I did with Blaque was credited to the group even though I did that just myself?” I nodded. “Well he works in entertainment law and what seemed like a normal deal to me seemed sketchy for him…” he paused and took a deep breath. “Said he’d look into it.” Another deep breath. “He just called, apparently Lou has been playing us for a while, taking more money than he should and some other illegal things.” 

“Wow, I’m so sorry.” I wrapped my arms around him and squeezed lightly. Then I stood on my tiptoes to kiss his cheek. He turned his face and pecked my lips. 

“Yeah, me too.” he tightened his grip on me. His face tinged with a wistful look. 

“So what now?”

“Now I need to talk with the guys…I don’t think I’m doing it here, though. I’ll let them enjoy this.” he motioned to the beautiful view in front of us. “Come on I’m starving, let’s get something to eat.” he started back into the room. I pulled on his hand and stopped him. 

“Wait, but what’s gonna happen now?” He stopped with a sad smile on his face. 

“I guess we’re going to war.”