There were five rules between the five of us.

Five.

It was one of those nights in the beginning of our career, when we were all still sharing the same tour bus, and we were all a little bit drunk, yes even Juju, just don't tell Johnny and oh my god, his mom. I don't even remember anymore why we were drunk, but drunk us started thinking out loud, more of wishful thinking back then, about our career - what we hoped would happen, how we would feel when it happens, our  friendship, our future, and then somehow we found ourselves making a pact. Five rules, since there were five of us, one person contributing one rule.

Cardinal Rules as Lance aptly called it.

One: No secrets, as contributed by JC.

The best foundation of any relationship is trust he said. Deep, I know. But, that's JC for you. He is, after all, our self appointed dad. So that night each of us told each other our deepest, darkest, secret and swore that from then on, that there would never ever be any secrets between us and secrets would be guarded by our dear lives.

Two: It would always be a group decision. This was from Lance. Whether it's as big as what song is going to be in the next album or as trivial as upsizing a Mc Donald's drive through order, if it involves *NSYNC, then all five of us have a say on it.

Three: We each have each other's back. We would respect, standby and be there for each other no matter what.

That's from Joey.  He even used the Ben Affleck and Matt Damon friendship creed as an example - should one of us find ourselves in a motel room with a dead prostitute in bed and a police officer by the door, our first call would be one of the other four. Hell, we even did the draw lots to know who gets to call whom. I call Justin. Justin calls JC. JC calls Lance. Lance calls Joey and he calls yours truly.

Four: Sisters are off limits. As in HANDS OFF.

Obviously, I was the one who insisted on that rule. I have two younger sisters and just that thought of one of them hooking up with Justin and, God forbid, Joey, always makes me think of a triple bypass even at an early age. So yeah, definitely, no hooking up with any of the sisters.

Last but not the least, the fifth rule from the prince of pop, Timber Timber Timberlake - bros before ho's.

No girl, no woman, and no matter who or what she is should ever come between us. According to him, there will never ever be any  moving in on any girlfriends, exes or present. Once someone calls dibs, then it's off limits for everyone else.  He insisted that it doesn't matter if the past is past, there's just no double dipping. 

On a side note, can I just tell you that when he suggested this, he crawled over to where Joey was, held his face with his two hands, and recited this rule in his face. If I still need to point it out, Joey is our resident Lothario. And Joey, God bless him, simply pushed Justin away, though he called him asshole.  Let me tell you that we nearly pissed our pants watching this, it was hilarious.

So there you go - five rules from the five of us for the five of us.

Sure there were other rules, but the five cardinal rules were supposed to be infallible. Non-negotiable. Can not be broken.

Yet here I am sitting inside my car, half-scared and confused, yet half deliriously giddy and happy.

Half-scared and confused because of the fucking cardinal rules.

Half deliriously giddy and happy because of Rachel.

Rachel who, you may ask?

JC's ex girlfriend.

It has been a good fifteen minutes since I walked her to the door and she got inside her  house yet I could still smell traces of her perfume, I can still see how her eyes beamed as she smiled, I can still hear her laughter echoing in my brain, I can still taste her lips, and remember how I felt when I kissed her.

Yes. I kissed her. It was just supposed to be a quick, platonic, peck on the cheeks, but somehow my lips touched hers and BOOM!

Sigh.

I am dead.

Really.

I could just hear Justin's annoying voice, Fuck you for breaking my rule, Christopher!  No double dipping, remember?

How could I forget? Why do you think I'm sitting here talking to myself like a fucking lunatic in the first place?

Oh God!  Then there's JC of course. Man, I don't even know what he would say about this. I know he's always been the logical one. But damn, you know what they say about the quiet ones. Fuck! What the hell did I get myself into?

But what can I do? Just ignore these feelings that are drowning me to the very core?

Okay, wait. Can you like to give me a second here?

Deep breath Chris. Count one ... two... three... deep breath. Okay.

I'm sorry. Man, I was never, ever, the sappy one. That's Joey's territory, sometimes JC. But me? No. That's not my thing. I'm supposed to be the cynical and crazy one.  But here I am spitting out mushy lines like ‘drowning me to the very core'. 

That's. Just. Wrong.

And for real, I'm too old for that shit.

I know you guys think that this isn't as bad as it seems. That our fifth rule, if you really look at it, depending on the situation, is actually debatable and negotiable, even if we all agreed it's part of the end all and be all rule. I mean, it's not like I broke JC's trust rule, or Joey's got each other's back rule, or my hands off on sisters rule. It's not like I'm trying my moves on anyone's sisters.

Now about Justin's rule, like I said, if you look at it, you can definitely find a loophole there somewhere. I mean, it's not like Rachel and JC are still together. Infact, it has been  years since they broke up, so it's not like I'm getting and ruining something between the two of them, right? They are in fact still good friends, so no harm done, right?

Plus, and don't you dare say I'm trying to reason things out again to my favor, because this is the truth, JC is now in a very serious relationship with his girl that there has been talks of a marriage proposal in our group text.

So as far as Justin's  no double dipping rule is concern, I... yeah, I know, I broke the fucking rule.

Sigh.

Oh, God! I really don't know!

It may sound trivial now and it's been so long ago. But I still made that promise. And we may no longer be a group, but we are still a family. I made that pact with my brothers and I really don't want to break it.

But ...

Yes. Unfortunately there is a ‘but'.

Like I said, I cannot just ignore this feeling that's overwhelming me right now.

Man! I do sound pathetically sappy right now, no?

Shit.

Do you think you can help me? Please?

Then again, I can always blame it on JC. Yeah, blame everything on JC. After all it was his fault why I found Rachel crying this morning.

===================================================

I immediately recognized the red vehicle parked on the side of the road the moment it came to view and worry immediately overtook me. Carefully, I shifted lane and slowed down to ease out of the traffic so I could find out what was wrong. 

"Rocky?" I tapped on the closed window, my worry escalated as I found her crying behind the wheel.

So before you ask who the hell is Rocky - it's Rachel. I sorta gave her the nickname. Rachel, Rocky. I know it doesn't make any sense but it did in my head back then.

"Bullwink?"

Yes, I know, again with the name calling.  But she does call me Bullwinkle or Bullwink or Bwink or B, depending on what she can spit out first, to get back at me for calling her Rocky and for making it stick. I'm sorry but like I said, it was amusing back then and admittedly, I kinda like it.

"Chris," she was obviously surprised to see me. She immediately grabbed a tissue from the box on the passenger seat and pressed the button that made her lower her window. "Hi," she managed to smile as she wiped her face.

"Jesus, Rock, are you okay?" I asked in concern despite the smile she just gave me.

She covered her face in her hands. First I thought she was going to burst into tears again, but instead she shook her head. "I'm so sorry," she mumbled. "I feel so stupid." 

"Unlock the door, Rock," I instructed before I went around and got in the passenger seat. "What's wrong?" I asked, gently putting a comforting hand on her shoulder. 

She finally removed her hands from her face and I automatically grabbed more tissues from her. She blew her nose and sniffed for a bit before she turned to be all red face. "It's stupid," she said.

"What is?"

"Dear Goodbye was playing on the radio."

"Oh," was the only word that I can come up with, knowing what she meant. Fun fact, JC wrote this song way before he went solo. And when his album came out with it, JC dedicated it to her. This was his  letting go song for her.

"I don't know what hit me, Chris, one moment I was  just driving, then next thing I knew the song was playing and boom! I was crying. I mean, who the hell plays that song a million years later on the radio?"

"Hey, it's okay," I assured her, tapping her hand.

"It's just that I haven't heard that song since forever and then ..." she sighed.  "I'm sorry," She shook her head, covering her face with her hand again.  She was quiet for a bit before she spoke again. "It was my fault you know. I broke his heart."

Of course I knew. Everybody knew. Do you know how many sleepless nights we spent listening to  JC whine and cry and sigh about her? The man was madly in love with her at that time.

They were together during our *NSYNC glory days - during the busiest and craziest time of our lives. She didn't imagine how overwhelmingly hard it would be - the separation, the missed calls, the unanswered texts, the forgotten birthdays, the fact that some fans were hating on her because of the mere fact that she was JC's girlfriend, it just got too much for her.

So she broke up with him even if it broke her heart because she loved him.

"It was one of the hardest things I ever did in my life," She said almost in a whisper and I was sure she was going to start crying again. "But I didn't know what to do then, Chris. I mean, JC Chasez - THE JC Chasez was my boyfriend and I should be happy and thankful and having the time of my life but instead, I was miserable! I was sad because I missed him so much, I was jealous of the fans because you guys were theirs a hundred percent. I am upset with the fans because they were calling me a ho..."

"I'm sorry about that. That wasn't fair to you."

She shook her head and started crying again, so I handed her some tissues before scooting myself over so I could wrap an arm around her shoulder.

And before you all give me the side eye, Rachel and I are good friends, okay? Like see each other once or twice a month to hang out with other friends, kind of friends. We remained friends even after her break-up with JC and actually became closer when *NSYNC's hiatus became permanent and everyone else but me left Orlando. So at this point, even with my arms around her, it's all platonic. 

When she finally stopped sobbing, I  let go of her just so I can grab more tissue from the box for her. "I'm so sorry, Chris, I don't know what's wrong with me today," she apologized, wiping her eyes and nose. "Maybe I'm getting my per ..."

"Well, shit Rock," I playfully stopped her short. "You can cry on me, put your snot all over me but no girly time of the month information, please."

She smiled.

"Aha! There's that smile so guess my work here is done." I squeezed her hand. "Let's go before cops spot us. We've been on the side of the road for a bit."

"I know, I'm sorry." She sighed.

"No worries," I assured her as I reached out to open the door to hop off her car.  "Are you going to be okay now?"

"Uh-huh." She nodded.

"Sure?"

"Yes. Thanks."

"Anytime," I nodded . "I'll see you around," I said before closing the door.

"I'll see you Chris," she said after she lowered the window. "Give me a call so we can hang or something." She suggested, before turning on her ignition.

"Sounds cool," I replied. "Bye, Rocky." I tapped the roof of her car. "Hey, can you promise me that the next time you decide to have a breakdown, it won't happen  on the freeway? I mean, I can't promise that I will be there again the next time." 

She sighed then smiled again. "I know. Thank you again, Chris."

There was something about how she smiled that made me study her for a second and somehow, even though I knew she was alright, I still felt a need to do something more for her. "Hey, what were you planning to do before you broke out the Kleenex fest?" I found myself asking.

She shrugged, leaning over to return the box of tissue to the dashboard. "I was on my way home."

"How about we do that lunch thing you were suggesting earlier?"

"Uhm, Chris, it's 4:30 in the afternoon," she reminded me.

Oh, yeah. "Well, let's do dinner then."

"Right now?"

"Yeah."

"Chris, you don't have to," she shook her head, probably thinking that I was just asking her because of what happened earlier. "I'm all better now, the song just really got to me and the girly thing, sorry."

"I was on my way to my sister's to pick up my nieces because I promised to take them  to the movies tonight. You should join us." I invited her.

"No, Chris, it's a family thing, I don't want to intrude," she replied with hesitance.

"What better way for a man to spend his Friday night but with three gorgeous ladies, right? This way, people would think I'm da shit."

I made her smile again and somehow, it did something good to me, made me all fuzzy inside.

She sighed and to my surprise, gave in. "Fine, okay."

That made me all fuzzy again, although I didn't pay much attention to it at that time. Again, still thinking that this was all platonic. "Excellent," I exclaimed, giving her two-thumbs up.

"So where do you want to meet up? I really want to go home first and change," she said, gesturing down to the suit she was wearing.

"How about I follow you home and wait for you so we can take my car," I suggested, surprising even myself.

"Chris. I already told you I'm fine." This time she frowned at me.

"I was just thinking that it would be easier to use just one car since your place is on the way my sister's anyway."

"Oh."

"So?"

"Alright." She finally agreed and let me tell you I was relieved.

"Okay, I'll follow you then."

=======================================

"Are you sure you don't want anything to drink?" She asked as I settled in on her couch.

I shook my head. " Nah, I'll wait till the movies."

"Alrighty then. Give me fifteen, twenty minutes, tops and I'll be ready."

"Are you sure? Because I know, being that I grew up in a house with three women, in girl language, fifteen to twenty minutes actually means, an hour to an hour and a half."

She laughed. As in heartfelt, my-god-I-just-love-that-laugh and I swear to you and that fuzzy feeling came back.  "You were the one who insisted on coming here, Chris," she reminded me.

I couldn't really help myself, I just had to smile. "Fine. But the moment you go over twenty, I'm pounding on the door."

She smiled back and I could have sworn I heard a click.  As to why I heard it, I really had no fucking idea.

"Remote's right by the side table if you want to watch some TV." She said as she disappeared into her room.

==============================

"No way I am watching a chick flick!" I shook my head vehemently at my two wards who at this very moment are both giving me the death glare. Hah! Like that would faze me. 

"Uncle Chris you told us that we get to pick the movie," Lily, the youngest, but believe me when I tell you that she acts as if she is the oldest, reminded me. She had her hands to her hips, a pout on her mouth and the all too familiar Kirkpatrick snarl on her face. A diva I tell you.

"Yes, Uncle Chris, you did say that," echoed her older sister, Emily.

I shot both of them a wry look. "Eh, when I said that, I thought you guys would consider the fact that I'm taking you, your uncle, to the movies, therefore you'd think that maybe, just maybe, I wouldn't want to sit for two fu - " I stopped, remembering how I promised my sister not to talk shit around the girls. "Two freaking hours watching a chick flick." I continued with a rather G rating term. And speaking of G rating, "Lily, I'm not even sure you're old enough to see this film." I walked over to the movie's poster to check the rating for the movie.

"It's G," Emily pointed out. "So, we're golden."

"I don't care even if we were platinum, Em. I am NOT watching that movie."

"Please Uncle Chris, Tom Holland is so cute!" Emily said.

"Total hotness!" Lily exclaimed.

I nearly had a heart attack. What did my nine year old niece just say? I turned to Rachel for help and found her watching us with such amusement.

"I'm with her," she pointed to Lily smiling. "The boy is hotness." Her eyes were filled with mischief.

I swear! Women! "I have one word for you Miss Rocky - STATUTORY!"

You'd think she'd back down? Nope. "Please, the boy is over twenty-one, therefore, legal."

What. The. Fuck?

Rachel probably saw how shocked I was that she started laughing as she turned to my nieces. "How about we see this one?" She suggested, pointing to a poster of a Disney movie. "Have you seen it yet?" When the girls shook their heads, she continued. "Everyone says it's good and it's rated G, that way you can keep your uncle Chris happy and he can still keep his male ego intact." She winked.

"But we really want to see Tom's movie, Rachel," Lily pouted.

I watched Rachel tuck a strand of hair behind her ear and then bended down so she could be at eye level with my nieces. "Me too but remember, your uncle Chris took you out tonight so he  can spend time with you. How is he supposed to enjoy tonight if we force him to see a movie he doesn't want to see?  So how about we see the Disney movie instead? Save the chick flick for you and your mom, no?"

To my complete and utter surprise, my two spoiled nieces listened, giggled and then said, "Okay," in unison, before trotting down to the concession stand. 

"How'd you do that?" I gave her the incredulous look.

"Do what?"

"Made them agree with you without turning it into a WWE Smackdown?."

She shrugged and smiled and there went that fuzzy feeling again.

"Amazing," I said before I walked towards the booth and purchased our tickets.

We had dinner after the movie, where my nieces entertained Rachel with much rather embarrassing family faux pas. It really amazed me to no end at how she tolerated the two she-devils I have for nieces. In fact, it almost looks as if she's actually enjoying their company.

"Uncle Chris, can we go check out the stores?" Emily asked as soon as we stepped out of the restaurant.

"Yes, please? Can we?" Lily seconded.

I looked at Rachel. "Do you mind?" I asked.

"No, not at all," she said.

"Yes!" Lily cheered.

"Okay, but not too long, okay? I promised your mom that I'll take you guys home at a decent hour since you've got dance class tomorrow, Lil."

"Thank you," Emily surprised me with a kiss and surprised me even more when she walked over to Rachel and kissed her as well.

"What was that about?" I asked as we followed my nieces make their way to one of the stores.

"What?"

"I saw Em whisper something to you. You are sharing secrets with my niece now?"

"She told me that they like me."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I dunno," she shrugged. "They're your nieces, you tell me."

"I guess they think you're cool."

She pretended to swoon. "Wow, guess I can die happy now. The Kirkpatrick clan thinks I'm cool."

I laughed. "Well, it is a feat."

She laughed with me and again the fuzzy feeling was back.

"So, uhm, are you sure it's okay with you that we follow the girls around or would you rather uhm..." I stopped to look around and saw the all mighty Starbucks neon sign. "Want to get some coffee?"

"That sounds good."

"Okay, hold on a second. Hey, Em," I called the attention of my older niece.

"What?"

"You girls go ahead. We're getting coffee, okay? I'm gonna call you when your time is up, cool?"

"Yeah, okay."

"Promise you won't ignore the phone when I call?"

Emily smiled. "Promise. Let's go Lily," she said, taking her sister's hand.

She had a latte with whipped cream while I had plain black coffee to which she wrinkled her nose and made a face the moment she took a sip.

"What?" I asked in amusement after I took a sip.

"I just don't get how you could drink it like that."

I chuckled. "Like what?"

"Plain. Black. Yuck."

"Did you even realize you rhymed?" I teased.

She stuck out her tongue in response.

"How do you think I stayed awake back in the day?"

She pretended to shudder. "Not me, like ‘em sweet. And speaking of sweet, I really think it's cool that you took your nieces out like this."

"And I really thought you were going to give me a heart attack when you agreed with Lily ..."

"That Tom Holland is hotness?" She quickly interrupted me with a teasing smile.

"Goodness, stop it please!" I begged as I took another sip of my coffee.

She laughed and there goes that fuzzy feeling again.  "What can I say? Your niece has good taste. Plus there was no way I can let that thing go. Are you kidding me? I mean that look on your face? That was precious, B!" Somewhere between all her hand gestures, she ended up brushing my hand.

Oh-oh. That fuzzy feeling I kept mentioning all night? Well, I'm not sure if it was the black coffee I was drinking but it sorta doubled. It intensified. Pushing the mug away from me, I gave myself a mental shake and tried to shrug nonchalantly. "Whatever."

She didn't say anything after that or in the next five minutes. "So," I finally said, as I couldn't stand the lull anymore. "About earlier ..."

"Chris..." She warned.

"I'm just trying to figure out ..."

"Nothing to figure out, Chris. It's just that, that song gets me all the time."

"Did you guys ever talk about it afterwards?"

She nodded. "When he came back home for the first time when you guys decided to go on a hiatus."

"Did you guys try to work it out?"

"Yeah, we figured we'll play it by ear and see but by then it was obvious that it was too late, that nothing really happened."

"But what if JC put his foot down then and said no. Would you think you'd still be together?"

She looked at me. Studied me to be exact, I'm gonna bet that she probably thinks I'm crazy right about now.  "I really don't know Chris. Maybe. Maybe not. That's something we'll never find out," she finally replied as she shook her head. "Besides, he told me that things are rather serious with him and his goddess divine actress."

This time I snorted. "Lucky son of a bitch, don't you think? Sorry, no offense," I gave her an apologetic smile as soon as I realized what I just said.

"None taken."

"I mean, between him and Justin, I swear they are hooking up with these women just to spite me."

This time she laughed and somehow that put me in a trance.

"Chris?"

"Hmn?" I swear I blushed. I rarely do that because first of all, like I said, I'm too old for this shit and second I'm not a wuss. But I just did, right now, because I didn't realized that I was staring at her until after she snapped me back to fucking earth.

"What? Do I have something on my face?" She asked, taking a napkin and gingerly wiped her mouth.

"I'm sorry, no. " I mumbled an apology, looking away hoping that I can wish away the warmth creeping up my cheeks. "I was just thinking." I lied.

She raised an eyebrow questioningly.

Truth be told, I wasn't really thinking of anything. I just had a sudden fascination with her laugh and her eyes - she has hazel eyes that change to green to gold depending on how the light hits her face.I really didn't pay much attention to it until now.

I opened my mouth but nothing seemed to come out. "Uhm ..." What?  "Uhm..." Come on Chris you can do it.

"Chris?" She's waiting.

I don't know.  Let's see. "What if... uhm..." What was it that we were talking about earlier? Oh, yeah, JC! "Do you still feel something for him?" I blurted out not knowing where that came from.

"What? Oh, my god! No. It's been forever, Chris. No," she insisted. "If there's anything - we're friends again and that's really good.  I mean, he was my first real love and that's definitely hard to forget but no - I don't have any fuzzy feelings for JC whatsoever."

I don't know why but somehow I was relieved. And wait, did she just say fuzzy feelings? "Is there someone special then?" I dared to ask.

"Like a boyfriend? Not right now, no," she shrugged. "I've been going out, you know that. But no one special. Nope."

"Why not?"

"Why not? Asked the pop star who is still single and ready to mingle." She teased.

"That's Joey." I corrected her.

"Technically Joey is no longer single and therefore, can no longer mingle." She reminded me.

"Funny." I smirked.

"So, what's your excuse?"

"I'm too old for this shit?"

"No you're not. Stop!' She gave a light laugh again and my heart just went on a tail spin again that I'm now questioning this whole platonic shit. "Come on Chris, answer me."

"Why am I still single?"

"Yeah."

"I believe I asked you first, Rock."

She frowned this time. "I don't know, I guess I just haven't met that person yet."

"What person? That lives up to JC?"

"Excuse me but in case you were not listening to me all this time, even JC couldn't live up to JC. So, no. What I meant was I haven't met the person that clicks," she said wistfully.

Wait, did she just say click? Because remember that click I heard earlier? The one that I ignored. 

"All I've ever wanted," she began to say.

"And all you've ever needed?" I dutifully interrupted.

She gave me the death glare. "Really?"

I chuckled. "What? You think I wouldn't say anything when you start spitting out lyrics to my song?"

"You know what? Forget you!"

"No! No! Sorry. I'm kidding. Go on, please.  I'm sorry. You were saying? All you ever wanted ..." I prodded, trying to keep a straight face because, you know, it wouldn't be me if I'm not all over that. "Tell me. tell me baby!" I sang because ... to quote JC - yes! I couldn't really help myself.

She made a face, probably in surrender because she knows me too well.  "Fine," she said. See?

"All I ever wanted, all I ever needed," she rolled her eyes then gave a light laugh. Then she was quiet. Then she sighed. Then she said, "I'm not even sure if it makes sense but I would like someone who makes me smile, laugh, Someone who listens, someone who's present - will always be here for me, specially when I need it most,  celebrate victories or offer a shoulder to cry on when I'm down and pissed or something stupid like having a breakdown on I-4 because of a song my ex wrote."

Did she just say that she wants someone who hands her tissues  everytime she hears JC's song?

Damn.

"Hey, it was not stupid," I did a little tap on her hand. "PMS maybe but not stupid."

"Woah! Woah! I thought that word was off limits?" She laughed.

"I'm over it." I smiled teasingly.

She shook her head. "Thanks again for earlier, Chris." She said earnestly.

"Don't worry about it, Rock. And what you just said - about your person, it makes sense."

"Yeah?"

I nodded. "It does," I assured her because somehow, that's all I wanted and all I ever needed as well.

=================================================

"Thanks for asking me to come with you guys tonight. I had fun," she was smiling bashfully at me as we stood in front of her door after dropping my nieces home.

"It was a pleasure," I smiled back hoping it didn't look quirky because, dude, I was feeling rather weird that very moment. Not only did that fuzzy feeling never left me since we sat on that table with the umbrella thing, there was also this knotty thing that was doing the Space Cowboy dance in my stomach.

"Well, I'm going to go in so I won't keep you any longer. "Thanks again."

I nodded but I didn't move.

"Chris?"

"Huh?" Oh God, did I just space out on her again? "I'm sorry," I shook my head. "And you don't have to keep thanking me, Rachel."

"Did you just call me Rachel?" She asked suspiciously. "You haven't called me by my actual name since forever," she pointed out.

She's probably right and I've got nothing as far as calling her Rachel. Freudian slip? For what? "Not true," I insisted. "I called you Rachel earlier when I introduced you to my nieces."

"That's because you were introducing me to them." She pointed out.

"Well, I had to whip it out once in a while and take it for a spin so my password does not expire."

"What the hell are you talking about, Chris?" She's looking at me with such amusement.

I crammed my hands in my jeans pocket and shrugged because I don't even know what the hell I am talking about.

She shook her head and smiled. "Good night, Chris."

"Good night, Rocky," I purposely said her nickname with emphasis.

She took a step and hugged me and let me just tell you that I wasn't really prepared for what I suddenly felt when she wrapped her arms around me. I'm not even sure what it was because I have never felt like this before and I'm so  sorry, like I said, earlier, I was never the sappy one. I think I finally understand how every female felt when JC licked the fucking floor!

Damn it! She smells so good and damn me for saying this but she felt good being in my arms.

"I'll see you around?" She said after she pulled away.

All I could do was nod because I'm all confused now. What the fuck is going on?

"Bye," she waved.

"Bye." I was going to leave it at that but I found myself leaning forward, intending to give her a friendly kiss good night on her cheeks, like I often do. But somehow, my lips had a mind of its own, as it missed her cheeks and landed on her lips, her soft, tender, sweet lips.

I was ready to jump back, what with the shrill of electricity I felt when our lips touched, and profusely apologize for being so bold, but the thing was, she didn't. Step back I mean. She in fact, kissed me back. She wrapped her arms around my neck and kissed me, gently, tenderly, lovingly.

Definitely no longer platonic.

Suddenly all the clicking and the fuzziness and the Space Cowboy choreography and most especially the JC licked the floor reaction feelings  made sense.                    

So this must be it. You know? All that crap you see on the TV and movies? The thing we sing about? That moment when you crossed the line from just being friends over to being something more?

Wow.

Amazing!

"Chris..." she said almost in a whisper after the kiss. "Wow!"

It was obvious that she was surprised as well with the sudden turn of events. "You can say that again," I smiled.

Now she was blushing and she looked absolutely adorable that I just couldn't resist kissing her, this time to where I was originally planning on kissing her, on the cheeks.

"I'll see you tomorrow," I said.

"Tomorrow?" Her eyebrows furrowed. "Did we make plans for tomorrow?"

"We just did."

"Oh..."

"I need to talk to JC." I thought out loud.

She nodded, still blushing. "Okay."

"Then we need to talk."

"Okay."

"How about dinner? Around six?"

"Okay."

"Is that all you're going to say? Okay?"

She simply smiled and man, that fuzzy feeling, I swear, it's now buzzing, clanging in a cadence even.

"Are you... uhm...  cool with this?" I had to ask.

"Wouldn't be saying okay if I wasn't, would I? How about you?"

Is she fucking kidding me? "I wouldn't be standing here like a giddy twelve year old if I wasn't." I admitted.

This time she laughed and man, call me a sappy wuss but it sounded like music. "Goodnight, Rachel." I kissed her again. I don't think I will ever get tired of doing that.

"You just called me Rachel again," she whispered after the kiss.

"Maybe I like calling you Rachel." I said then kissed her again. 

 __________________________________

So after a very long conversation with myself, I know that's bordering lunacy but you have to give me a break here, I just found myself in the middle of a turning point here, I finally convinced myself that calling JC was the best thing to do in order to solve my dilemma.

Although I wanted to call him right there and then before I lose my courage, I figured Rachel's driveway wasn't really the ideal place to do it. So I willed myself back home and as soon as I entered the front door, I dug my phone out from my pocket, checked the time, and did a little math in my mind. Around ten pm, okay, good, it will be seven in LA, and knowing JC, he should be at home, unless he is out having dinner so ... shit. I can probably wait till tomorrow but then again, I don't think I can. 

So, I guess this is it.

Nervously, I tapped his name from my phone's favorite list hoping that I would get his voice mail. He picked up after two rings.

"Hey, JC, how's it going, man?" I tried to sound as nonchalant as I could.

"Chris? Hey, man! Good to hear your voice. What's up?"

"Uh, nothing just figured I call to say hi. So, uhm... are you ... ah ... are you busy?"

"I'm getting ready to go out for dinner but it's all good."

"Okay, good." I nodded as if he could see me. "Well, uhm.... JC?"

"Yeah?"

How do I tell him?  "I ..."

"Chris?"

"What?"

"What's going on?"

"What?"

"That's your second what."

"What?"

"Third. Man, what's wrong? You sound weird."

"Uhm, well, it's nothing really, considering ..."

"Considering what? You are scaring me, CK."

"C, do you remember our cardinal rules?"

JC was silent for a second and then gave a light laugh. "Wow that was so long ago. But yeah, of course.  Wait, why? Are you in a motel right now with a dead prostitute in bed with you? Because dude, I'm not your call, it's Justin."

I had to smile. "Ah, no. Don't worry."

"So what? Chris? Are you okay?" JC sounded genuinely concerned. 

"Yes. Yes I am. It's actually about ... it's about Rachel ..." I cringed, my heart pounding like a drum.

"Rachel?" His tone was obviously confused at first and then I heard him say, "What about her? Did something happen ... Oh." His voice trailed when he probably realized what I meant.

"I'm afraid so... " I sure hope my voice was audible. I just... man, I was just afraid of what he was thinking right now.  I took one deep breath hoping that it'll calm me. It didn't. "So what do you think? Are you up to talking to me about it now or should I call Justin first and let him give me the lecture about breaking his rule?"

JC didn't reply right away that it scared me to death. I think I started to bite my nails because I heard my teeth chattering.

"Are you sure, Chris?" He finally said.

"Yes," I was able to say.

"Are you in love with her?"

Whoa! Love?

My heart began singing - "You're all I ever wanted, you're all I ever needed, ye-ah!

What the fuck.

"It just happened, JC but maybe?" I said with a hopeful smile.

"Chris, you know that you don't need my blessing, Rachel and I broke up eons ago."

"I know but I also know how much she meant to you."

"That's all in the past. Chris, do you even read my messages in our group text? I've been talking about proposing for about half a year now, you idiot!" He sorta whispered the part about proposing.

I know. "I just need to hear it from you."

"Chris, as long as you promise that you'll take care of Rachel, then you have my blessings."

"I promise," I assured JC because I knew in my heart that it was a promise I know I can and intend to keep.

/End