After an extremely long night, morning had finally come. There was a tiny window near the ceiling of his cell, and it let a small amount of light inside. Even though it wasn't a lot, it was enough for him to tell that it was still fairly early - that the sun probably hadn't risen fully yet.

It wasn't the first time JC had stayed up all night to see the sun rise, but it had been one of the worst nights he'd had. He hadn't moved much from the spot on the bed where he sat with his legs to his chest, only getting up once to reluctantly use the toilet that was on the other side of the cell. His legs, back, and neck ached from the unnatural position he'd been in all night, but he hadn't been able to force himself to lie down on the cot and get some sleep. The idea had sent shudders down his spine every time his eyes grew heavy enough that he'd consider it, but it only lasted a split second.

JC's stomach rumbled with hunger, and he wondered idly if they would make him eat before they left for the airport. He hoped that wasn't the case and that he could somehow convince the undercover cop that would be with him to let him get some coffee and some kind of breakfast sandwich at one of those coffee kiosks at the airport. There was no way he'd be able to choke down whatever breakfast they came up with here.

He wasn't sure when the cop would come get him, and he lowered his head so his face was buried in his knees. His eyes closed, trying to give himself at least a little bit of relief since they burned from the lack of sleep. It was hard to breathe in this position, but it was almost favorable compared to smelling the dank, unclean odor of the cell.

"I guess I can't leave you alone for more than a week without you getting into trouble."

JC's head snapped up at the familiar voice, the quick motion pulling on sore muscles in his neck and back. There, on the other side of the cell, was Lonnie. He was pretty sure he had never been so happy to see one of their bodyguards in his life.

"Lonnie," JC said, though it came out as a croak given how dry his mouth was. He hadn't eaten or drank anything since the night before when he and the guys had all had dinner at his house. He cleared his throat. "What are you doing here?"

"I heard about what's going on and thought you could use a change of clothes."

Lonnie held up a pile of clothes that were gripped in his left hand, and JC nearly laughed with relief. He'd love nothing more than to shower this awful jail cell off of him and finally get rid of the scent of the place. But knowing that wasn't an option, he would gladly take a change of clothes. After all, he'd been in his sweatpants when he'd been hauled out of his house.

JC would've jumped up from the cot if he'd had the energy. Instead, he straightened his back and straightened out his legs so he could stand. He was on his feet for a second before he nearly fell, stumbling as his muscles tingled from being stretched after sitting for so long. Thankfully he managed to regain his balance, and he hobbled over to Lonnie, pins and needles moving up his legs.

"You're the best, Lonnie," he said, thankfully taking the clothes Lonnie offered through the bar.

JC made his way back to the cot on his unsteady legs, and he didn't have to look at Lonnie to know he was frowning in concern. He could practically feel his heavy gaze follow him as he moved through the cell. But Lonnie made no comment about it.

Instead, he said, "Go ahead and change. I've got you covered."

Then Lonnie turned around so he was facing away, and JC saw that he tried to angle himself so that anyone coming down the hall would see him before they saw JC. It was such a small thing, but it made JC nearly weep, his emotions on the surface thanks to the never ending anxiety that this place just continued to provide him with.

JC changed as quick as he could, the task becoming easier as his muscles started to lose the tingling feeling. He'd exchanged his underwear the fastest, not wanting to be naked longer than absolutely necessary. From there, it only took another minute to pull on his jeans and the long sleeved t-shirt. Once he was dressed he almost felt normal. Right then he would've given anything for his deodorant and his toothbrush.

"I'm done," JC said quietly, letting Lonnie know it was okay to turn around. He handed over his sleep clothes to Lonnie. There was no way he wanted to keep them - what he really wanted to do was burn them after being in this place - but he also knew he couldn't just leave them behind or toss them in the garbage somewhere should someone come across them. It wouldn't be the first time fans had gone through the garbage for stuff of theirs.

"I hate seeing you in there, kid," Lonnie told him with a frown. "It doesn't look right."

It didn't feel right. He had of course brought it on himself though. Maybe if he had told the police what had happened right after Sabrina killed Marc, he wouldn't be in this situation. Actually, he knew he wouldn't. There had been no evidence that he'd killed the man, and his then girlfriend would've gone to jail which would've kept her from blackmailing him. But he hadn't and as much anxiety as being in jail gave him, he knew on some level he deserved it. And not just for neglecting to report Marc's murder.

JC shook his head, trying to clear his head of those thoughts. He couldn't allow himself to think about those things right now. He wanted to try to have as much control over his emotions as possible when the cop came to escort him to LA, which surely should be anytime now. And Lonnie was still standing there, leaning casually against the wall like he was waiting for something.

"Um..." JC licked his lips, raising his head to look Lonnie in the eye. "Not that I'm not happy to see you, but what are you doing here? I somehow doubt you came just to bring me clean clothes."

"I'm going with you to LA," Lonnie said.

JC blinked. "But I thought-"

"Did you really think I'd let you go without me?" Lonnie asked, cutting him off. "The cop's job is to take you to the station in LA. My job is to protect you, and I have my doubts he knows how to handle a mob of fans."

JC couldn't help the way his heart leapt at that. The idea that he wouldn't be going through this alone - that someone would be there to keep the cop honest and from potentially harassing him - was one that made him relieved. He suspected Johnny had called their bodyguards to let them know the situation and had asked Lonnie to accompany him, and JC was never more grateful for Johnny's interference.

"And the police are okay with that?" JC asked a bit hesitantly. Given the attitude the one cop had shown last night, he knew they were going along with his lawyer's request that this be handled low-key very begrudgingly. He was sure they didn't take too well to being told a personal bodyguard would be tagging along.

Lonnie gave a little shrug. "Doesn't really matter. They have no say in this. My job is protect you, so where you go, I go."

To Lonnie it was really that simple, and JC knew the other bodyguards felt the same way. They took their jobs very seriously, and they had all been through a lot together. Their bodyguards had become like family.

"Besides," Lonnie added, "this helps keep everything looking normal. Because none of you guys would be traveling alone right now, not while you finish up the album."

Technically they had all managed to go home for the holiday and return without being accompanied by bodyguards, but JC knew that was different. Really it was probably the last time they would be able to. At least if this album turned out as well as they were all hoping. That assumed of course they managed to get through this without anyone finding out about him being arrested or his past.

The sound of footsteps interrupted JC's thoughts, and he and Lonnie both turned to see a man walking towards them. He was in jeans, a t-shirt, and a dark denim coat. Even though he looked like a normal guy, the way his jaw was set and the hardness in his eyes told JC he was the undercover cop that would be accompanying him.

"I'm Officer Ray Warren. I'll be escorting you to LA," he said, looking straight at JC. He paused then to look back at Lonnie. "And even though you're tagging along, I'm the one running the show."

Lonnie gave him a short nod. "We'll both just be doing our jobs."

Officer Warren didn't say anything, but the lines on his face relaxed just a little. Like he was relieved to know that Lonnie wouldn't interfere unless he had to. It was such a small thing, but it made JC hope that things wouldn't be quite as tense as they would've been if the cop from last night was escorting him to LA.

The cop opened the cell and allowed JC to step out. There were no handcuffs this time, only one more warning that if he tried anything at all that he wouldn't like the consequences. JC said nothing because he had no intention of causing problems. He wanted this over as quick and painless as possible.

There was a car waiting out back, and JC was guided into the backseat. He watched as Lonnie opened the hatch of the SUV to put JC's dirty clothes into a bag. His surprise at seeing his familiar duffle bag must have registered on his face because Lonnie said, "You wouldn't take a trip without any bags, would you?"

JC shook his head, his lips curling just slightly. It seemed the guys and Johnny had thought of everything. Hopefully that meant this whole thing would go without a hitch and if they were spotted by fans or press, no one would know the real reason behind the trip to LA.

******************

Joey sat in the uncomfortable airport chair, slouched down a bit. His head remained upright so he could be on the lookout for JC. He and the guys had reluctantly left the police station last night with Johnny and the lawyer, pausing outside briefly to talk. They had told Johnny under no circumstances would let they JC go to LA and face the police there on his own. Johnny hadn't objected in the slightest and had even mentioned they should pack him a bag, that he would call their bodyguards to accompany them and send Lonnie specifically to JC.

That had made them feel a little better, but they'd still stayed up most of the night. The first thing they'd done was decide who was going to accompany JC to LA. There had only been three seats left on the flight that JC and the undercover cop would be on, and two of those would go to Lonnie and another bodyguard. That left one open seat, and everyone had a reason as to why it should be them. Or, Justin and Chris had the strongest arguments at least. Lance had said that JC would need a calming influence, which wasn't either of them. And before Joey knew it, he'd been nominated to go. Chris had said it was because he was laid back enough to keep JC from getting too tense, but he was better at seeing through JC's bullshit than Lance.

So Joey had gone along with Mike to the airport, and now he was just waiting on Lonnie and JC to arrive with the undercover cop. His leg bounced while he waited, his body hopped up on caffeine from the coffee he'd consumed even in spite of how sluggish the rest of him felt. Though, he knew the jitters were only partly from the coffee. He was anxious to see JC and find out how he'd faired from the night in jail.

The thought of one of their best friends sitting in a jail cell had weighed on all of them through the night, even though they had known there was almost no one there. All the horror stories of things that happened in jail wouldn't have happened to JC. Not in one night, and certainly not in a nearly empty police station. Their biggest concern was the emotional side of it - how JC would handle it.

Finally, after what felt like hours, Joey spotted them. Well, he spotted Lonnie first, the big man easy to pick out. Then his eyes zeroed in on JC, ignoring the unknown man that was walking slightly ahead of him. The group was slowing down, and then JC looked towards the gate where Joey was sitting.

Their eyes met, and Joey could see the surprise on JC's face even before he said, "Joey?" with bewilderment.

JC walked towards him, the unknown man who Joey could only assume was the cop and Lonnie following behind him. Even being several feet away, Joey could see the dark circles below JC's eyes and the slumped shoulders. There was also the hair that was unkempt and the general haggard expression on JC's face. They all told Joey that it hadn't been a good night, and even though he hadn't expected anything different, it broke his heart just the same.

Joey stood up and as soon as JC was close enough, he pulled him into a hug. JC's arms hung limply at his sides for a second before he finally brought them up and tightly returned the embrace. It lasted for a couple seconds before JC finally pulled away, still looking at him in confusion.

"What are you doing here?" he asked.

"Did you really think we were going to let you face this on your own?" Joey returned, eyebrow raised.

JC shook his head slowly. "You shouldn't be here."

"Is that any way to talk to the guy who bought you coffee and a blueberry scone?" Joey reached down to the cardboard container to retrieve the untouched coffee and held it up along with the paper bag that contained the pastry. He shook the bag a little, and he was happy when he managed to get a smile out of JC. It was a small, exhausted one, but he would take it.

JC took the coffee and lifted the lid, inhaling the strong aroma before taking a large mouthful. Once he swallowed, he gave a little sigh and looked at Joey. "I take it back. You're a godsend."

Joey smiled at him and reclaimed his seat, patting the empty one next to him. JC dropped into it with another sigh, this one speaking of weariness. He drank a few more mouthfuls of coffee before he reached for the bag that contained the scone. It didn't take long for the pastry to disappear, and while JC was always a fast eater, it was obvious he was nearly ravenous. Something that surprised Joey because he would've thought all the anxiety would've made JC lose his appetite, but he was glad to see that wasn't the case. He needed his strength, especially since the lack of sleep had already zapped him of so much energy. It made him want to get JC more food, but before he could even get up, the gate agent announced they were going to begin boarding.

JC downed the rest of his coffee, and because they were all situated in first class, they were the first to board the plane. Joey stepped right behind JC who was leading the way, cutting in front of the undercover cop. There was no way he was going to let the cop sit next to JC for the five hour flight to LA. It wasn't like he needed to in order to keep JC from doing anything - they were on a plane and couldn't go anywhere. So when JC picked a row and slid in, claiming his usual window seat, Joey took the aisle seat right next to him. The cop frowned, but he didn't say anything as he took a seat across the row. Mike and Lonnie sat behind them, but Joey barely noticed as all his attention was on JC.

He'd already buckled his seatbelt, keeping it loose enough that he could slouch down in his seat. His body was angled toward the window, which kept Joey from being able to see much of JC's face. But he could tell that as tired as JC was, he wasn't nearly ready to give into sleep like Joey had thought he would. It wasn't hard to imagine why though - no doubt JC's thoughts were swirling as he thought about when they arrived in LA and how he'd be interrogated by the police there who thought he was a murderer.

"Are you okay?" Joey asked, his voice low to keep it from carrying beyond their seat area.

JC nodded, not even glancing at him. His body remained turned away, and his gaze was fixed on something out the window. Joey sighed, though he hadn't really expected a different response.

"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked, knowing that he couldn't leave JC to stew in his thoughts. Not without at least trying to get him to release the burden from his shoulders.

JC turned his head this time and looked at him, the irritation evident on his face. "About my night in jail? Or about what happened in LA?"

Joey blinked. He wasn't surprised by the short, biting tone because JC never liked talking about himself - at least not about the personal stuff that he felt was no one's business. But he hadn't thought JC would figure out so quickly what he was really asking about. Usually it was easier to get JC to talk about stuff when he was tired because he was so out of it and didn't always realize what he was saying. It seemed that JC had been on high alert for it though, and so in retrospect he shouldn't have been surprised at how quickly JC shot him down.

"I don't want to talk about any of it."

Sighing, Joey sat back in his seat. Chris had made him promise to at least try to get JC to talk, but honestly he wasn't surprised it hadn't worked. Though, maybe he would have better luck talking about something else since JC was distracted with the LA stuff.

"What about Penny then? Can we talk about her?"

JC had returned his gaze out the window, and this time when he turned away, he gave Joey an emotionless expression. "No."

JC tried moving closer towards the window, and Joey grabbed onto his shoulder, forcing him to angle his body away from it and towards him instead. "JC, c'mon. You can't keep doing this." When JC stared at him, unmoved by his plea, Joey realized he would have to take a page out of Chris's book. "Either we talk about what happened out in LA, or we talk about what happened with Penny. It's your choice."

"We already talked about Penny," JC protested, his voice rising slightly. He glanced around and quickly lowered his voice back to the soft, just-above-a-whisper level they'd been speaking in. "I broke up with her, and there's nothing more to it."

"I don't believe that."

JC turned his head away and muttered, "Well, that's your problem. Not mine."

Joey sighed heavily. He wasn't surprised by JC's outright refusal to talk about it, but he hated it just the same. Most of the time he couldn't blame JC for being so private considering their career took away so much of their privacy already, but it seemed to keep JC from letting them in. Unless his defenses were weakened, like when he was sick.

"I'm not trying to annoy you," Joey started, not quite willing to give up yet. And the flight attendants were still moving about the plane, signaling they weren't ready to take off for at least another couple minutes. He leaned in, trying to see JC's face. "I just want to understand. You were happy with her."

JC looked at him with a frown. "Are you saying I wasn't happy before?"

"No," Joey denied, shaking his head. JC had been perfectly happy before he'd met Penny. He had his moments where he got homesick or depressed, but they all did. It was the price of being on the road all the time, but generally they were all happy because they were doing what they loved. But it'd been different when Penny came into the picture. "You were. It's just with Penny I think you realized that something had been missing. She'd given you someone to love and be intimate with, and she'd loved you in return. She loved you as JC the dork, not JC Chasez, one fifth of NSYNC."

JC's frown deepened, not even the slightest amount of amusement apparent on his face at the slight jab Joey had made. "You act like I won't ever find that with someone else."

"Maybe you will, maybe you won't," Joey said. "But why take the chance when you already have it?" A thought suddenly occurred to him. "Unless she did something to hurt you..."

He looked at JC hesitantly. As his friend, Joey knew he wasn't overstepping any boundaries here as he was just trying to look out for JC. But at the same time, he was afraid of how JC would react. Would he shut down and completely refuse to respond? Would he lash out at the not-so-subtle push into finding out why they broke up? As it turned out, he did none of those things.

JC blinked, like he was surprised that was where Joey had gone with the line of questioning. He didn't look Joey in the eye, but he shook his head slowly. "No," he said softly. "She didn't do anything. Not like that."

"Then what happened?"

JC's rubbed at his eyes, and Joey felt like he was wearing him down, that they were finally getting somewhere. But then JC dropped his hand and looked at him with eyes that were red from exhausted, his face pale and drawn. "Can we not talk about this right now?" He paused for a beat before he added, "Please."

JC was looking at him with such a pleading expression that Joey found he couldn't deny his friend anything at the moment. The last twelve hours or so had been quite an ordeal, and he didn't need another thing to make him feel even worse. He could wait to find out what had happened between JC and Penny until after they got everything resolved in LA, and the guys would have to be content with that too.

"Of course," Joey said. He gave JC a sympathetic smile. "Why don't you try to get some sleep?"

JC nodded and angled his body back towards the window again, his right shoulder brushing up against Joey's left. It didn't look comfortable by any means, and while Joey couldn't see JC's face again, he knew it wouldn't take long for him to fall asleep. Even as worried as JC was about LA, once they got in the air it would only be a matter of minutes before he was asleep.

What Joey didn't know was it wasn't actually what was going to happen once they landed in LA that was occupying JC's thoughts. Instead, all he could think about was Penny. Something he cursed Joey for doing because now in addition to how crappy he already felt, his heart ached.

JC hadn't wanted to tell any of the guys anything, but he couldn't let any of them think she had done something to hurt him, like cheating. If anything, she had looked out for him more than any girl he'd ever been with. Something that had started the very day they'd met, and that he'd experienced first hand when he'd invited her to meet up with him that night.

Sound check was over, and while it hadn't gone terribly, JC had known it could've gone a lot better. He hadn't seriously messed up, but there was no denying that he was distracted, his thoughts constantly going back to the beautiful girl he'd met at the park and her offer. Her business card had been burning a hole in his pocket all day, and given the way his mind kept wandering, he knew he needed to do something about it before the show.

So when the guys had left the stage after sound check, JC had gone a different direction. He was going to call Penny and see if she wanted to get together before he left town. Something that required a bit of privacy, which was hard to come by on tour so he had to go searching for the perfect place.

It was hard to find a part of the arena that wasn't full of activity and quiet enough that he could talk without feeling like he would be yelling into the phone. Finally, he managed to find a small hallway where there wasn't a lot of foot traffic. He stopped at the end of the hall and leaned against the wall as he pulled the card and phone out of his pocket.

Holding the phone in his right hand with the card in his other, he carefully dialed Penny's cell phone number. He couldn't imagine she was at the office number listed. Once the number was entered fully, he put the phone to his ear and listened to it ring. The ringing only lasted a couple seconds before there was an audible click and her sweet voice came through.

"Hello. This is Penelope Fischer."

JC sucked in a breath. "Penny, hi. It's JC."

The formality left her voice. "Hey," she said, and JC could picture that sunny smile she'd given him at the park. "Wasn't sure I was going to hear from you."

JC wasn't entirely sure what to say to that. So what he said instead was, "Would you be interested in getting together tonight?" He didn't give her a chance to shoot him down as he quickly added, "I know it's really last minute, but we'll be leaving tomorrow afternoon and I'd like to see you before we do."

Her light laughter made him stop, and for a second he wondered if she was laughing at his offer. Then he quickly realized she was laughing in amusement. "Whoa, JC. I know your time is limited, and actually I can do you one better."

"What's that supposed to mean?" JC asked, his brow furrowing in confusion.

She laughed again. "It means come around to the back entrance of the arena. I've been standing back here for ten minutes trying to convince your bodyguards to give you a package."

It took a second for what she was saying to sink in. She was here. At the arena. She'd sought him out, and it left his heart soaring. He didn't feel so much like he'd gone out on a limb calling her. He smiled.

"Okay," he said. "I'll be right there."

He hung up the phone and quickly made his way to the back of the arena. There were a set of double doors which were both open to allow some cool night air to make its way inside the stuffy, warm backstage halls. Several of their bodyguards along with a few of the arena security team were standing in front of barricades that had been setup to keep fans out, who were pressing on the other side of the barrier. For a second he wasn't sure how he was going to spot her, but then his eyes landed on her. She was standing right in front of Lonnie, a thin envelope in her hand.

"Penny," he called, slowing his light jog so he was standing between Lonnie and one of the unknown arena security guards.

Lonnie looked down at him. "You know her?" he asked, his eyes going to the blonde standing in front of them. The fans around her were screaming and reaching out. Thankfully there were only a couple who had managed to find their way behind the arena.

"Yeah." JC's eyes met Penny's, and he smiled a little. "She's a friend."

Lonnie looked at him for a moment before he nodded. "Okay, c'mon." He motioned for Penny to come through, and the other guards tensed as the fans shot jealous looks and glares at Penny. They seemed to be afraid that the fans would start trouble and try to force their way through with Penny. To help with this, JC stepped forward and gave a smile to the fans. He reached out and shook a couple of their hands, signing one or two things that were thrust at him.

Once Penny was safely inside the arena and standing behind Dre, JC waved at the fans and thanked them for coming out. Then he turned on his heel, nodding briefly to Lonnie and Dre before leading Penny down the hall away from the chaos.

JC pulled her into one of their dressing rooms, knowing that the guys would still be in the Toy Room for a bit longer. He shut the door behind them, and when he turned around he found her smiling at him. "What?" he asked, feeling a bit self-conscious.

"You're even nicer than I thought." JC looked at her confused and she clarified, "The fans. You were really sweet taking a minute to say hello and sign a few things."

JC just shrugged. "They're the reason we're here. It gets crazy at times, but I do what I can to make them happy. Plus I wanted to make sure they didn't cause a scene with you coming through."

"Don't act so modest. Not a lot of celebrities are so cool about their fans and how crazy they can get. Believe me, I know."

JC shoved his hands in his pockets, rocking on his heels. He'd never been great at taking compliments, and he certainly never knew what to say. So he just changed the subject.

He cleared his throat and nodded towards the envelope she was still holding. "So is that for me?"

She smiled and handed it out to him without a word. He stepped forward and took it from her, slipping a finger under the tape to open it. When he did he found there was a picture inside. Of him. It was the picture she had taken of him at Central Park.

He looked at her. "I thought you were gonna hang onto this?" he asked, remembering the teasing gleam in her eye as she'd told him he could call if he was interested in seeing how the picture turned out.

"I was," she agreed. She got to her feet and moved so she was looking directly into his eyes. "But when I saw it, I thought you deserved to see what I do."

JC looked back down at the picture. His head was turning away from the street, but his gaze was still focused on something out of sight. His face was serious, and to his surprise there was actually a butterfly just caught in the frame flying past his left ear. But he didn't see anything that hinted at what she meant.

"I don't see anything," JC told her.

Penny grabbed onto his wrist and pulled him over to the small couch, pulling him down with her so they were sitting side by side. Then she gently took the picture out of his hands and gestured to it while she began to explain.

"Your expression is serious and you're squinting a bit at the glare the sun cast on the building over here," she said, pointing to a building that was visible above the tree line of Central Park. "But that's all just surface stuff. If you look harder, you can see the way the corner of your mouth turns downward and the stress line around your eyes. In your eyes though, you can see a longing."

"For what?" JC asked, lifting his eyes from the photo to look at her.

She shrugged. "For a life free from the stresses that come with being a celebrity?"

"Is that why you wanted me to see this? So I'd stop worrying about stuff?"

"I wanted you to be aware of it. From what I can tell you're a very serious person, but that shouldn't keep you from happiness," she told him.

"I'm happy," he defended automatically, though he didn't really feel it. Maybe he had been spending more time obsessing over their public image and getting through all their responsibilities and not actually allowing himself time to relax and enjoy it.

Penny raised an eyebrow and lifted the picture. "This says differently. I don't see a trace of happiness, and that's what I wanted to you be aware of. No one should go through life unhappy." She paused, and it felt like they were just inches apart as she said quietly, "Especially someone as sweet as you."

JC gave a sad little sigh at the memory before forcing it out of his mind entirely. Part of him may wish she was here with him to help him through this, but she wasn't and it was entirely his fault. He didn't get to long for things that he'd pushed away, and while he was feeling a little bit of regret, this whole situation with returning to LA to face a dark part of his past had him glad he'd broken things off. No way did he want her to get caught up in this. It was bad enough the guys were refusing to let him handle this himself, but having Penny realize he wasn't quite the person she thought he was...well, that wasn't something he would've been able to deal with.

Though, it was his hope he could make it out of this whole thing without the guys finding out just what he'd done while he'd been with Sabrina. Things would never be the same if they found out, and he couldn't let that happen. They'd been through too much to let anything keep them from finishing their album and finally doing the music they'd always wanted. He just prayed his ex wouldn't somehow make an appearance and ruin everything.