“No offense at all but I can’t help but laugh at this situation,” Colleen smiled across the table at Joey and Sara. “I mean, good for you both but, you know, I feel bad being the third wheel.”

“It’s still a casual thing,” Sara reminded her, “but since Joey’s in town…”

“And I promised her a real date this time,” Joey smiled.

“Please tell me this isn’t the date because that would be really shitty,” Colleen laughed.

“Hey! I can be a gentleman. Date night is after we finish recording but I wanted to make sure I got to see you too.”

“You guys have been so sweet to me through all this. I’m not sure why but I do appreciate it.”

“JC’s my friend but he’s a doofus and sometimes you gotta intervene and help your boy out.”

“So that’s what this is? Keep a running pulse on me to help JC with his next move?” Colleen gave Joey a sly smile.

“Maybe a tiny bit but in this case you’re friends with my girl also so it’s good to keep tabs on you,” Joey winked.

“I’m your girl now?” Sara asked in amusement.

“Don’t read too much into it,” Joey leaned over and gave her a quick kiss.

“Surprised Matthew didn’t insist on a date as well while you’re in town,” Colleen joked.

“He did, we’re going out Wednesday night,” Joey confirmed. “Matthew’s cool. He likes to say off color shit to make me uncomfortable which is exactly what I do to people so we get along.”

“Plus I had to make a deal with him so he didn’t go all Fatal Attraction on us,” Sara stated.

“What kind of deal?” Colleen raised her eyebrow.

“I tell him all the sex stuff and he doesn’t touch Joey’s penis,” Sara explained.

“Wait, that’s the deal?!” Joey exclaimed in surprise as the girls laughed. “Well damn, I hope you hype me up a bit.”

“Not too much. If I make it too good, Matthew might get to a tipping point where he wants to find out for himself,” Sara chuckled.

“Yeah, that’s not happening. Even if it was, I’m too old to be juggling two relationships. I don’t know how JC does it.” Joey’s eyes grew wide as he met Colleen’s, who were equally in shock at his statement. “Shit, sorry, I…”

“Joey, Jesus!” Sara swatted his arm. “Don’t remind her of that. I thought you wanted them to get back together.”

“What? You don’t?” Joey turned to her as Colleen let out a slow breath, thankful Sara didn’t pick up on what Joey was actually referring to.

“It’s not my call. I just want Colleen to be happy,” Sara stated.

“And I want JC to be happy and Colleen makes him happy,” Joey countered.

“If he was so happy, he wouldn’t have cheated on her,” Sara said defensively.

“Ok, put the swords down,” Colleen interjected. “I am not having you two fight over JC and I. We’re adults and we’re talking. That’s the best update I can give you.”

“Well, you saw him last week, right?” Sara asked.

“Yeah, we did lunch between client meetings. It’s just so awkward. I’m really trying to be open to all the things he’s saying and doing and it’s honestly great to see him putting all this work in but I just don’t know that I want to get wrapped up in it all again.”

“Colleen, I told you before: do not compromise who you are for anyone, including JC Chasez.”

“I know and that’s…that’s been the hardest part. All the alarm bells are going off saying to move on but my heart…my heart wants to try, even at the risk of it happening again.”

“You’re Sandy Olsen in this scenario,” Joey pointed out.

“I’m who now?”

“Sandy, from Grease. Her head was saying “Fool, forget him!” but her heart was saying “Don’t let go!””

“Proud of you for not singing that.”

“It was really hard, not gonna lie.”

“Joey, you realize she completely changes herself to be with Danny at the end, right?” Sara pointed out.

“Yes BUT the part people always forget is he got a letterman sweater to be more like the kind of guy she liked as well.”

“Which he immediately threw off once he saw she changed to be what he wanted.”

“I’m pointing out there was compromise.”

“What part of that is compromise? They both felt being themselves wasn’t good enough? Fuck that, go find someone who appreciates you for you.”

“Fine, not compromise but maybe just the other person drawing something out of them they normally wouldn’t have given themselves permission to do before?”

Sara opened her mouth to counter again but Colleen interrupted. “Seriously, we aren’t comparing my love life to a musical though if we were, JC would be Putzie.”

“More like Doody,” Joey snickered.

“You’re Doody,” both women told him.

“Look, my point is, while Sara is completely right that you shouldn’t go against your core beliefs or morals or what not, if your heart still loves him, it’s maybe worth giving it another try.”

“Colleen, sweetie, I know you’re in love because you never act like this,” Sara leaned in and grabbed her hand. “I’m not saying don’t take him back exactly, I just want you to really consider what kind of situation you’d potentially be going back into.”

“I know,” Colleen huffed. “At least you see the dilemma.”

“I do,” Sara reassured her.

“Well, I know one thing that will help,” Joey proclaimed. “Why don’t both you ladies swing by the studio tonight? Colleen, I’m sure everyone would like to see you and Justin and Chris are bugging me to meet Sara.”

“Fuck yeah!” Sara enthused. “I didn’t get to meet Justin when he stopped by Colleen’s so I’m absolutely in!”

“Oh, Joey, thanks but that’s probably not a great idea,” Colleen began to decline.

“Come on, please? If you do want to get back with JC, you know it’ll mean the world to him for you to be there. If you don’t, take advantage of getting to hear your favorite band sing new songs before anyone else.”

“Who said you guys were my favorite?” Colleen teased.

“Yep, just JC. No shock there,” Joey rolled his eyes. “I yell at him all the time to stop being so talented and handsome and he only listened about the handsome part.”

“Joey!” the women yelled, Sara smacking his arm once again as Colleen kicked him under the table. “Jesus, the physical violence with you two! I know JC likes it rough but I’m a sensitive soul.”

“Now you’re just being an asshole,” Colleen scowled at him.

“I knew there was more to what you were telling us!” Sara pointed her finger at her friend. “Spill or I’ll get it out of Joey.” Sara looked seductively at Joey as she flicked her tongue around the end of her straw before giving it a hard suck.

Joey audibly moaned and looked back at Colleen. “I’m a weak man. I suggest you tell her.”

“I suggest you’re now paying for lunch and I’m ordering the wagyu steak,” Colleen raised her eyebrow at him. Joey looked at the menu as his eyes nearly popped out of his head at the price. He muttered angrily but didn’t argue. Colleen turned back to her friend. “JC…likes a woman in charge, let’s just put it that way.”

“Duh, he’s dating you. I don’t know a more in charge woman than you.”

“Don’t sell yourself short,” Colleen smiled, “but, I mean, you know that’s not normally how I like my sex so…”

“Wait, she knows about the…?” Joey stopped himself but pulled his hand to his side and swirled his index finger at Colleen.

“No, she doesn’t,” Colleen stated through gritted teeth, “but you are making a terrible case for me getting back together with JC if you know.”

“Oh, this is going to be so good,” Sara could barely contain her excitement.

Colleen sighed and sent out a silent apology to JC as she was about to sell him down the river to keep her own secret. “JC has a…Mistress. Like, not a sex Mistress but a…ok, well, she is a sex Mistress but not like the cheating kind but the dominatrix kind.”

Sara’s mouth fell open in shock as Joey looked at Colleen quizzically, knowing that’s not what he was referring to. Colleen gave him a hard look and he was at least smart enough to know to keep his mouth shut. “Are you…you were ok with this?” Sara finally asked.

“Yeah, he explained it early on and I was fine with it.”

“You were? So, are you not now? Is that part of the problem?”

“Shockingly, it has nothing to do with the current situation. Raina and I have talked a lot and we eventually came to an understanding.”

“Hold on, you met her?!” Sara said in disbelief at how wild this story was getting. 

“Yeah, we’ve, you know…talked,” Colleen shifted in her chair. Even after everything, she still respected JC’s privacy and was already feeling guilty for bringing it up. Perhaps she should have sacrificed herself on this one?

“So, what does she do?” Sara asked in amazement.

“Actually, I still don’t have a straight answer to this either,” Joey sat forward, listening intently.

Colleen sighed as she looked around. No one appeared to be listening but they were still in public. “She…does the things I don’t like to do so much. I mean, I do them just not to the caliber JC would like, I think…maybe. It works though cuz then he can be a little more…forceful with me.”

“So you’re basically outsourcing the parts you don’t want to do?” Sara surmised. “This is brilliant!” 

Colleen looked at her friend in bewilderment. “Wait, what? You’re…you’re not freaked out?”

“Hell no,” Sara confirmed. “No wonder this relationship worked out better than the others. I figured just cuz he’s JC, the sex was good to begin with but being able to pick and choose what you want to do then handing off the rest so he’s still fully satisfied? Genius!”

“Ok, well, it’s not quite that simple,” Colleen chuckled.

“I’m gonna start outsourcing your blowjobs to Matthew,” Sara informed Joey.

“What?!” Joey nearly screamed then quickly lowered his voice. “What’s wrong with giving me a blow job?”

“Have you ever given one?”

“Of course not!”

“Then you have no idea how much work they can be,” Sara stated. “Honestly, not my favorite thing.”

“Well, you certainly fooled me,” Joey shook his head. “You know, licking pussy isn’t exactly a joyride either.”

“I know but you do it so well,” Sara cooed at him and kissed him.

“As long as you know,” Joey smiled then looked at Sara. “Wait, do you know or do you KNOW know?” Sara raised an eyebrow and smirked as she turned back to Colleen who met her with an equally sinister grin. Joey observed it all. “No…you two…did you? Oh God, please tell me yes,” he begged as the women started giggling. Joey groaned and looked down at his crotch. “Not now, little buddy. Gotta eat first.”

The women now were in a full fit of laughter as Sara pulled out her phone and sent a quick message to Colleen.

S: Do we break it to him now or later that he’s got it wrong?

C: Definitely later. Make him suffer for a while lol.

“You sure you’re ok with going?” Sara asked a few hours later as she drove with Colleen to the recording studio.

“Yeah,” Colleen breathed. “I’d like to see everybody. No big bash this time around as Karly stayed home with Nash since school started so Chris is staying with JC to give Justin and Jess some space.”

“How’s that going?”

“Justin said it’s been crawling along but it’s moving in a positive direction so that gives me some hope maybe JC and I can work things out.”

Sara bit her lip. “Do you mind if I ask you something?”

“Go ahead, I know you’ve been chomping at the bit all day,” Colleen chuckled.

“I just…a dominatrix, Colleen? I don’t even know where to start with the questions.”

“Yeah, I know. JC really is a freak but I…I like it. He was very up front about it so I knew before I got too attached what the situation was. I know who she is, I know what they do and I swear, I’m fine with it all.”

“Never took you to be the sharing type.”

“Me neither but, ok, I know this sounds weird but they don’t have sex so somehow that makes it easier to digest the whole thing.”

“If they don’t have sex, what exactly do they do?”

Colleen thought rapidly about how to explain to Sara without giving too much detail away. “He, you know, like I said, he likes a woman in charge. Change of pace kind of thing, just like me.”

“You like a guy to play rough and manhandle you a bit. I feel like JC’s arrangement is a bit different. Why the need for a professional?”

“He’s got money so if that’s what he wants to spend it on to get exactly what he wants, why not? How many times have we been single and frustrated?”

“The key word there is single. Plus, they aren’t having sex so I don’t get the point?”

“Just cuz they aren’t having sex doesn’t mean it’s not sexual.”

“So, what? I mean, is it just teasing him or are they doing stuff? Like, is he on his knees licking her pussy?”

“Jesus, Sara,” Colleen stated exasperatedly, confirming why she had never brought this topic up with her friends previously. “It’s everything but penetrative sex, ok? Happy?”

“Colleen, all I’m trying to do is understand, ok? Because right now I’m confused how having a dominatrix isn’t cheating but making out with some chick is?”

“Because I know about the dominatrix and what they do together whereas I certainly didn’t agree to him fucking Vegas chick, let alone know about her.”

“So it’s an open relationship you two have?”

“No. I mean…no. It’s not like he could start dating someone else and I’d be ok with it.”

“But he’s basically in a relationship with this woman and that’s ok?” Sara could see how flustered Colleen was getting, “Honey, all I’m pointing out is that if you go back, you’re still going to have to share him. Is that really what you want?”

“I don’t know how to explain that in general, no, I don’t. He’s my boyfriend, he’s my love, he’s fucking mine but when it comes to Raina and Raina only, I made peace with the situation long ago.”

“So could you do the same thing? Could you go get some Dom to do all kinds of dirty kinky shit with and then come home to JC?”

“I could, actually,” Colleen replied confidently. “I absolutely know I could. Also, just for the record, JC and I do plenty of dirty kinky shit on our own, thank you.”

“Colleen, I say this with literally no judgement but did JC activate some hidden sex freak button in you or are you fooling yourself into believing this arrangement is ok because he’s JC? I mean, I can’t imagine he’s ever going to truly commit to you, or anyone, the way you’re explaining all this.”

“JC doesn’t want to get married, or he’s afraid to. Yes, I’d like to but, I don’t know, it’s not a dealbreaker is what I’m saying. You can have commitment without a ring. This would have been just as devastating whether we were married or not. I’m rounding the corner on forty and, I guess JC has made me rethink what’s truly important to me and marriage…isn’t, as much as I thought. Having a man who is a true companion and partner in every aspect of my life is what I want more than anything.”

“And you think JC is that?”

“Yeah, I think he is,” Colleen smiled.

“Then I guess you found your answer,” Sara frowned slightly. “That or the sex is really that mind blowingly good.”

“It’s SO good,” Colleen giggled. “Seems like you think getting back together is the wrong call.”

“Mind blowing sex does not a relationship make.”

“It’s not just the sex itself, it’s…” Colleen struggled to find the right words. “You ever have something, sexually, you always wanted to do but were too afraid to say? JC makes me feel safe to say those things and do them. It’s…he’s someone I never thought I’d have in my life in so many ways.”

“Guess he really did find the hidden sex freak button,” Sara chuckled.

“No, he didn’t. It was always there, Sara. He’s just the only guy I’ve ever been with that pushed it.”

Sara pulled into a parking spot outside of the studio. “Honey, that’s amazing you found someone to connect with on that level but you really need to decide if that’s enough to stake your future on a guy that isn’t going to marry you.”

“Marriage and commitment aren’t always mutually exclusive.”

Sara looked her friend dead in the eye. “Normally I’d say you are smart enough to know you can’t change a man but this time…just really really think through what YOU want and don’t you dare push that aside for him.”

“I’ve been thinking for nearly three months and I feel like I’m no closer to an answer,” Colleen looked down.

“You’ll know when you know, sweetie,” Sara said, giving her a reassuring smile. “Just make sure, either way, you can live with your decision.”

Colleen gave a half hearted smile in return as she got out of the car and headed inside to watch her maybe boyfriend and his band mates hard at work.