She sat, somewhat nervously, waiting for JC to walk in and start their final.  Justin sat next to her, much more relaxed.

“How are you so calm right now?  What if he doesn’t like it?  What if the rest of the class doesn’t like it?”  Jenny panicked.

“You like it, and that’s all that matters to me.  I wrote this song for you, so as long as you like it, still love me, nothing else matters.  I doubt he’d be that subjective, to fail us because it’s not his style of music or whatever.  I’m sure not everyone’s song is going to be something we like, but we can appreciate their hard work as musicians, the planning and time and effort that went into everything.”

“You always have such an interesting spin on things, I love it.”  

Justin held his hand in hers.  “I love you, very little else matters.  I could have torn my ACL and never play another game of basketball in my life, and I’d still be happy with you by my side.  I’d go into teaching or something musical instead.”

JC walked in, everyone suddenly getting last second nerves, Justin being calm and upbeat.  The class had signed up on a sheet so JC knew who was doing solo pieces and who was working as a pair or group to ensure everyone was working on something to present.

“Today’s the day.  I’m sure you’ve all been working hard in preparing for this.  I amend that to say I hope you’ve been working hard to prepare.  This isn’t the intro level course, so you wanted to be here, I hope that means you put in the work and aren’t hoping to skate through without putting in effort.  This final is 50% of your grade, so I hope you all make it count.  Best of luck to all of you, I’m sure we’ll hear great things today,” JC said before having a seat in the front row.

He began calling people on the list, in a seemingly random order.  One female student sat down and played a complicated Beethoven piece from memory, another a Rochmaninoff.  A trio played an original piece for piano, violin, and cello, one group did a jazzy brass song.  Jenny started to feel that their song was maybe too juvenile, singing a love song in front of everyone.  No one was really singing, just playing songs they memorized or wrote themselves.  While Justin had written the words and music, Jenny was simply singing along, feeling like she suddenly hadn’t contributed much to the piece.  

Justin sensed her trepidation.  “Hey, it’s fine.  You’re gonna do great.  I say that as a musician and not your boyfriend.”

“It’s just so different from everyone else…”

A young woman walked up, singing the famous aria from Mozart’s The Magic Flute, Jenny feeling more insecure in their piece.  It wasn’t a classical piece that had high notes to impress JC with her range.

“Sing from your heart.  Just sing to me and you’ll be fine.  I’ve heard you sing besides our song, you could do this just as well.   Don’t let her make you feel any less of a singer because ours isn’t something classical.  I wrote it for you, and us singing it to each other may seem cheesy, but we do a damn good job of singing it together, and I think that shows our bond to music and to each other.  We’ve got this.”

Everyone else had gone, Jenny realizing JC had purposefully left her for last.  She wasn’t sure if it was flattery or torture.

“Ms. Thomas, Mr. Timberlake, our last piece,” JC said optimistically.

Justin sat down at the piano in the room, smiling at Jenny.  She still felt nervous, closing her eyes as Justin began to play the intro.  She began to sing, unconsciously clutching the necklace JC had given her that sat around her neck.  She opened her eyes, looking into Justin’s, Justin barely looking at the piano as he played and began to sing with her on the chorus.

Feelings of the night she heard the song for the first time flooded back to her, intensified by singing the words in front of a group of people she only knew because they’d taken a class together, they were still practically strangers after over 3 months together.  

It was raw and vulnerable, sharing your emotions for someone else in a song for strangers.  Yet looking at Justin, things felt so right.  She realized the placement of her hand, seeing JC’s eyes almost fixed on her hand, holding the pendant.  She wanted to let go, but her hand remained, feeling some kind of pull to JC.  She knew why Justin was wary of the other man, not even knowing who he was.  He held a power over her she couldn’t explain.  She’d been lucky to walk away from his kiss the night of the funeral, but she wasn’t sure she could stay away if he wanted her that badly.  He’d opened up to her, something she never expected.  As much as she loved Justin, JC was being vulnerable with her in a way Justin wasn’t.  She’d been vulnerable with both of them with her dad, and she felt JC understood her more, having a complicated history with his own father.  She found herself wondering if she could really have the full range of emotions she felt for Justin with JC.  

The song ended, a smile on JC’s face.  She felt guilty for thinking of him during a song Justin wrote about her, a song that had been theirs until that moment.  She was relieved it was over, no longer forcibly being around JC.  She had promised to go to his show, but that needed to be it. 

They hadn’t decided where to apply to move into, but she was starting to consider the other complex over being so close to him. The possibility of him hearing them having sex, but the possibility of him getting in her head again and being back in his bed made her legs clench but her stomach churn. She’d never been so conflicted in her life about one man.

…

Jenny flopped onto her bed, Maddie studying for her last final.

“You’re done with Josh now, you can relax…”

“Except I’m not,” Jenny sighed. 

“Genevieve, you can’t possibly be considering ruining everything with Justin…”

“No, at least I don’t think so.  Josh asked me to go to a show he’s doing with some friends at Toons on Saturday.  I told him I’m not going alone, probably with Justin.”

“I’ll go with you, I’ll bring Jeremy and it’ll be a double date.”

“You don’t think I can handle myself around Josh, either…”

“Either? Does Justin know?”

“No. We ended up looking at an available apartment literally right next door to Josh.  I told Justin the other guy lived in the building, and he was less than thrilled that the better apartment is so close to a guy that isn’t even competition…”

“Then why are you all worked up over this?” Maddie asked. “You kissed him after the funeral, after seemingly finally getting out from under his spell.  Now you’re questioning things with Justin…”

“No, I’m not.  I just… Josh is opening up to me, can relate to things with my dad… If I didn’t know any better I’d swear he’s trying to change for me, even without me asking him to.”

“You can’t have Josh. Even if he is changing, he is married.  You said so yourself that he doesn’t believe in marriage anymore after all of this.  Could you really be with him but not married, that he could want that?”

“That’s the thing. I think I could, if that’s what he wanted. But like you said, like I said, he’s sworn off marriage. If he wanted any type of commitment, I dunno… Here’s the thing. I love Justin, I do, so much. I think if Josh changed his mind, wanted any of what I have with Justin, I’d be open to it.”

“So you’d leave Justin for Josh if he wanted you?” Maddie asked, annoyed at the conversation. 

“I… don’t know. I just hope I never have to find out.  If I actually had to pick a guy, the situations were exactly the same with both guys, I don’t know who I’d pick.”

“You said you love Justin. Do you love Josh?”

“No,” She answered honestly.  “I know my feelings for him, whatever they are right now, is not the love I feel for Justin.”

“Then you have your answer, you’ve had it for a while, so why keep doing this dance with Josh? Because you hope he’ll change? That you’ve changed him?”

“I can’t explain it, Maddie.  I’m feeling this deeper connection with him now, he’s being more vulnerable with me after losing his dad.  Maybe he HAS changed, realizing what’s important…”

“Jenny, you can’t keep doing this to either guy!  Justin isn’t the asshole you thought he was, now Josh isn’t, either?  I can’t have you pick based on their sexual performance…”

“No, I’d still be at a stalemate.  I taught Justin what I learned from Josh.  Had I only been with Justin, I’d like to think it would still be amazing, he’s been pretty open to things, so I doubt it would’ve been like David.”

“I almost wish you’d never banged Josh, you’d be with Justin and that would be that.  I know I don’t know Josh, but from what I’ve heard from you, I like Justin better.  Unless Josh can suddenly offer you an actual commitment, get out of his marriage or whatever, but even then I don’t like the idea.  I’ve gotten to know Justin, he doesn’t deserve that kind of heartbreak.  He waited all that time so you could be his first, then to dump him for another guy?  Isn’t that what his last ex did to him?”

Her eyes widened.  “Yeah.  Shit, you’re right.  But Josh…”

“No.  Drop it, whatever you’re thinking, whatever you’re feeling.  You love Justin, not Josh.  Don’t give up a good thing for something unknown.”

…

“Justin, where are we going?  You told me to get all dressed up, why?” Jenny wondered as they walked across campus.

“You’ll see.  I have a surprise for you.  It was a surprise for me, too, but I found out earlier.  Now it’s your turn.”

“Ok, now I’m nervous…”

“I want to celebrate the end of the semester, spend an amazing night with my girlfriend, a night we won’t soon forget.”

“Oh god,” she gasped, “you’re not proposing, are you?  You’re all dressed up, wanted me all dressed up…”

“No, though that’s coming at some point, you better believe it.”

“That’s a relief.  I mean, I’d say yes, but it feels so quick, you know?”

“But when it’s right, you just know.  We’ve both known for a while that this is it, we’re the ones for each other.”

Her stomach began to knot, her mind going to JC.  Was Justin really the one she was meant for, or did she happen to fall in love with the wrong guy?

They walked to the edge of campus, crossing the street.  She couldn’t help but look at the coffee shop as they walked, passing the entrance for the complex JC lived in, wondering if he was there.  Justin wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling her back to the present, walking with Justin to an unknown location.

“I thought about going out to a club, dancing with you, but this sounded better, just us…”

They walked past city hall, on the far end of the block past school.  They crossed the street again, Justin leading her to a set of glass doors.

“Justin, where are we going?  There isn't a restaurant here, it’s apartments.  I’m sure the office is closed and it’s too late for a tour…”

“Just trust me,” Justin said. He punched in a code, the door unlocking, opening the door for Jenny.

The lobby was full of art, giving her a reminiscent feeling of their night at the fundraiser.  She felt more of the part in a killer dress, one Justin had picked out for her when he took her shopping.  It was black, super low cut, with the skirt stopping just below her ass.  It was long sleeved so it gave her some warmth, thankful that it wasn’t too cold yet.

He led her to the elevator, pressing a button for the third floor.  “Where are we going?  Why are we here?” Jenny asked again.

“You’ll see.  I want to show you a few things first.”

Jenny sighed in frustration, Justin kissing her forehead.  “It’ll make sense soon enough.”

They got off on the third floor, Justin leading her down a hallway.  Her eyes widened as she saw a pool deck, people there having a BBQ on the deck, sitting in comfy lounge chairs and friends sitting in cabanas.

“Are we here for a party?” Jenny wondered.

“No, our party is just the two of us.  But this looks cool, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Moving on, let’s go back to the elevator…”

“Justin, what are you doing?”

“You’ll see…”

They got back into the elevator, Justin pressing the button for the top floor.  Jenny was in awe of what was before her.  They walked into a large, open room.  Music was playing, there were TVs on, people playing pool, food on a large counter and long kitchen island.

“There’s a movie room upstairs, along with a foosball table.”

“Justin, what are we…?”

“I have one last place to show you, then we’re done for the night, so to speak.”

They got onto the elevator again, Justin pressing the button for the 7th floor.  The elevator opened, Justin leading her down the hallway.  He stopped at a door, unlocking the door.

“Justin, where are we?”

“Just come inside, look around.”

She stepped inside, the apartment fully furnished.  It was perfect.  The couch was curved, giving plenty of seating in front of a large TV, a full kitchen, and then she saw it.  On the wall above the dining room table was the art piece she and Justin had gone to see.

“Justin, is that?”

“Yeah, he finished it recently.  So, what do you think?”

“Of the painting?  It’s beautiful…”

“Of the apartment,” he smiled.

“Justin, it’s… wow.  But why are we here?  Don’t the people living here mind that we’re here?”

“Not at all.  It’s ours.”

“What?”

“Welcome home.”