“Yeah, he’s married.  My parents ran into him at an alumni function after he finished his double Masters, and he brought his wife…”  the voice trailed on but Jenny had stopped listening.  Her face fell, she felt like everything was crumbling beneath her.

“Jenny?” Justin asked, his voice breaking her out of her bubble.  “You ok?”

“Yeah… I’m fine.  I guess I shouldn’t be surprised he’s married.”

“Don’t tell me you have a little crush on him, too?” one of the guys teased, looking at the girl that brought up him being married.  

“I mean, I guess.  He’s handsome for sure.”

They continued talking about their classes and such, Jenny getting to know more people.  She’d swear she’d catch Justin glancing at her every once in a while, trying not to make eye contact with him.  

“Well, I gotta go meet Marie, but I’ll see you guys around,” Justin said before leaving the dorm onto campus.

“How long has he been with Marie?  I’ve been… warned about Justin…”

“He’s just a serial dater, it’s college,” one of the guys shrugged.  

“To answer your question, they were on again off again for a while last year, on again as of a couple weeks ago.  They decided being apart for the summer wasn’t going to work, her family goes off to wherever the rich people go.  She’s Olympic bound, he’s being scouted by the NBA, it’s a match in athletic heaven.”

“I’m gonna go, but it was nice to meet you all, see you around since we live in the same dorm,” Jenny said.  

She walked back into her room, fell on her bed, lying on her back.

“He’s married?” she sighed questioningly.

“Who’s married?” Maddie asked.  “Don’t tell me that Sex God is married…”

“Professor Chasez, my music theory teacher…”

“Don’t tell me you have a crush?  Did we learn NOTHING from Ross and Elizabeth on Friends?  Pretty sure the school has a similar policy, even if you aren’t his student.  Shut that dream down right now, Jenny.”

If only I could, she thought to herself.  I guess I have to, if he’s married.  That’s the bigger piece to this.  If he texts me tonight, that’s fine, but if he wants to meet, I’ll end things face to face.  Maybe Justin is interested.  I dunno, I’m 21 but also not a big dater.  David and I got together so I wasn’t alone on what became a group date to the movies, but then things progressed because I thought that’s what I needed to keep him.  I liked him eventually, then obviously sleeping with him, but I don’t want that again.  I don’t want someone I feel I have to do certain things with, and Justin seems like that kind of guy.  JC doesn’t, oddly enough, despite the nature of our relationship.  

…

Jenny woke up the next morning, having gone down to the student services center to grab dinner the night before, the food court there had better options than the dining hall.  After she ate, she went back to her room and fell asleep.  She looked at her phone and saw she’d missed a text from JC.

Are you awake?  I’d like a repeat of the last time, throwing in some new things we’ve done together…

She typed a response.  Sorry, I passed out hard last night.  Hopefully you aren’t disappointed.

She began getting ready, putting on a pink tank top and a denim skirt, wanting to look cute but be comfortable in the late summer heat.  She pulled her hair back into a simple low ponytail.  Her phone buzzed on her bed.

You could never disappoint me, Genevieve.  I’ll see you in class.

She felt excited that he wanted to see her, but also nervous knowing she’d have to end things.  She heard a tap at her door.

“Justin, what’s up?” she asked, opening the door a crack, as Maddie was still sleeping.

“Let’s grab some coffee or something before class, breakfast?”

“Sure, beats going by myself.  I’ll meet you in the common room in 5?”

Justin nodded with a slight smile, Jenny finishing getting ready before heading out for the day.  She grabbed her bag of binders and books, ready for her first set of classes. 

Justin was sitting on a couch in the common room, standing once he caught sight of her. Jenny had to keep herself from smiling at how cute he was, how happy he was just to see her.

“I know there’s the coffee place off campus, but there’s a great little spot on campus when I don’t wanna go across campus.  They’ve got great pastries and breakfast sandwiches.”

“I’ll just grab stuff from the dining hall as part of my room and board package,” Jenny sighed. 

“If it's the money I can…”

“Yes and no. It’s… complicated. I don’t want to be a burden with that.”

“Not at all, I’m here if you wanna talk.”

“Once we grab breakfast.”

They walked to a little coffee place on the back side of the student services center, with a little awning and outdoor seating already set up. 

Jenny got an iced black tea, Justin an iced latte, getting both of them the breakfast wraps. They sat down outside, watching people come and go. 

“So, you’re sure you want to hear my drama?”

“I don’t know about drama, but if it’s something you want to share with me, then I’m good.”

Jenny took a deep breath. “My parents are separated right now.  It’s been a couple months. Not an ideal situation, definitely not in any of our control, not really.”

“It can be tough. My parents divorced when I was really little, so I guess I’m lucky I don’t remember much about it.”

“This is definitely different. The rough part is it started on my brother’s birthday.  He just turned 15, so it’s a rough time anyway, let alone your dad leaving unexpectedly.  I’ve been working all summer to help Mom keep up with bills and rent.  They have somewhere they’re staying now that she says I don’t need to worry, but I feel like it’s my job to step up and be what my dad can’t right now.”

“So you feel you need to save as much as you can to have money saved up in case she needs help?” Justin asked. 

“Yeah. It’s been hard being away from them, but you and Maddie are helping a lot.  Yesterday was nice, meeting new people. Sorry about Maddie freaking out…”

“I was afraid to bring that up…”

“She said you dumped a friend of hers out of the blue, moved on like it was nothing.  She’s just protective of me after my ex, making sure I’m not hurt again if she can prevent it.”

“You wanna talk about it?”

“Is that the kind of thing friends talk about like this?”

“How do you mean?”

“I’m a girl, you’re a guy.”

“Am I? I hadn’t noticed,” he laughed. 

“I just don’t have guy friends that ask me about things like that. I guess I’m glad this isn’t a date, that would ruin it for sure…”

“To not being a date,” he said, raising his cup.  “If you want to tell me, I want to listen.”

“We were together about a year and a half.  I broke up with him on my birthday after he ditched lunch plans to be with a girl I knew he liked. She doesn’t feel the same way, but he still chose being with her over being with me on my birthday.”

“That sucks.”

“It’s been over a year now but we’d still hook up from time to time if we were particularly lonely. Ok, that might be an overshare.”

“When was the last time you saw him?”

“Right after everything with my dad. It’s been a couple months.  Trying to move on so I don’t keep getting hurt, I know he’ll never want me the way he wants her.  Maybe that’s why the sex wasn’t super incredible, but he was my first, so…”  Her eyes widened at what she’d just admitted.  “Ok, THAT was definitely an overshare…”

“First loves are hard.”

“I don’t think that’s what I’d call it. I don’t know that we even liked each other when it all started, but it was better than being alone.  I know I wasn’t super into him at first, clearly he wasn’t into me.”

“Enough to sleep with you,” Justin noted.

“Isn’t that most guys though? Like girls just enough to get laid?”

“Not all guys,” Justin was quick to reply.

“Says the guy with a heartbreaker reputation.”

“One I’m trying to change,” he said softly. 

They finished breakfast and headed to their first class. She was thankful for her notes and stuff from JC on the reading, it made her feel more prepared and understand the lecture better. 

She felt a pit in her stomach about ending things, especially the sex, but he was married and her professor.  No matter how exciting it being forbidden felt, it wasn’t worth ruining his career, her reputation, and ruining a marriage.

They walked to music theory, getting seated before JC came in.  They were talking about plans for the afternoon when JC walked in, seeing her sitting next to him, talking closely.  She felt his eyes boring into her, unhappy at how close she was to someone else.

She was drawn to the passion he had in his lecture, it was clear music was in his blood, he was truly one of them, passing on knowledge and personal experiences.  She was almost entranced, Justin seeing her taking notes and practically staring at their professor.  He also noticed how much it felt like JC was making eye contact with Jenny, or at least their general direction, and how his face would change making eye contact with Justin.

Class ended, Jenny walking towards JC.  “Ms. Thomas, I need to see you for a minute.”

“You need me to stay?” Justin asked.

“I’ll be fine.  I’ll meet you in a bit, ok?”

Justin nodded, a concerned look on his face.  

“You should go, Mr. Timberlake…” JC said, his voice firm.

The room emptied, the two of them alone.

“‘I’ll see you soon?’  I don’t like you talking to him like that.  Like he stands a chance of being with you.”

“Like you have room to talk, Mr. Chasez.”

“What do you mean?”

“I know you’re married.  This thing between us ends now.”

“No.”

“Excuse me?”

“No.  This ends nothing.  I don’t love her, I don’t even want her sexually.  You, on the other hand, you challenge me in ways she could never dream.  And the way I want you, it’s like nothing I’ve ever felt before.  I want you like I’ve never wanted anyone else.  Your mind, your body, I need it more than anyone else I’ve ever met.  So yes, while I’m married, it’s complicated and meaningless compared to what exists between us.  You are the only woman I want, and I want to be the only man you want.  Do you understand me?”

“What will you do if I continue seeing Justin?”

“Seeing him?”

“Being friends with him, close with him.  We have two classes together, are a couple rooms apart for a third, live in the same dorm…  I’m bound to be around him.”

“I don’t want you around him.  I felt very uncomfortable with him sitting next to you in my lecture.”

“It’s a free country, he can sit where he wants.”

“Not next to something that’s mine…”

“Yours?  Like I’m property?”

“No, but you are mine to please, to make you cum endlessly.”

“Oh god…”

“I’m going to show you just how much I want you, Genevieve.  I know we have an hour before this room is needed again.  I”m going to lock the door and make sure you know you are mine, and I am yours.  You won’t need Justin, or anyone else.”

She froze on the spot, watching him go to the solid wood door and lock it from the inside.  His eyes burned with an intensity she’d never seen before.  As intense as their sessions had been, she knew this would be more than any they’d had yet.

“You wore a skirt for me, as if you knew this was coming,” he smirked.  “Good girl, making it easy for me.”

He pulled her to him, his body hard and ready to go, pressed against her.  His lips crashed against hers, his hands grabbing her as if to claim her as well as bring her pleasure, tweaking her nipples through her shirt before running his hands up her shirt.  She groaned against his lips, swallowing her noises whole as his tongue penetrated past her lips.

She squeezed her legs together in anticipation.  Her fingers went into his hair, holding him close, as if to make the moment freeze in time.

“I hate to make this quick, but I don’t want to blow our cover.  I’m going to fuck you, but know what I have planned for tonight will be longer, giving you all the ecstasy you deserve.”

He pushed her denim skirt up her legs, revealing her thong, pulling it down her body.  He held them up to his nose, inhaling her scent deeply.  “I”m keeping these for when we have our late night text sessions, so I can smell you even though you aren’t there.”

He bent her over the solid table next to the lectern.  He entered her in one smooth motion, Jenny biting her lip to keep from screaming and giving themselves away.  He filled her so completely, his pace an all out sprint yet giving her so much pleasure from the angle and intensity.

He grabbed her ponytail with one hand, pulling her head up.  “Who do you belong to?” he growled.

“You, Josh.  No one can fuck me like this but you.  You feel so good…”

“Cum for me, I’m so close, you’re so fucking tight, Jenny.”  He reached around her, pressing her sensitive cluster with precision, Jenny feeling like she was going to explode at the intense friction inside and out of her body.

“OH… god… YES… I’m… I’m…” she struggled to speak.

“Let go, Jenny, I’m there…”

She groaned as he grunted in release, trying hard to be quiet.  He grabbed tissues from the table, handing them to her.

“Use these to cover yourself, then get to the nearest bathroom to clean yourself up.  Though I hope Justin can smell the scent of our sex on you when you see him later.  So he’ll know you belong to someone else and he shouldn’t waste his time.  Go, and I’ll see you tonight at the coffee shop.”

She did as instructed, going into the bathroom before meeting up with Justin. 

“Should I be worried? That’s two classes in a row he’s needed you to stay after…”

“No, everything’s great, fantastic, amazing,” she said, realizing she was laying it on thick while also describing the sex she just had.

“Did you wanna go over notes or anything today before your next class?”

“I’m actually short on time so we can talk, but not for too long before my next class.”

“What are you doing after?” Justin asked. 

“Shouldn’t you be following Marie around at least half as much as you do me?”

Justin recoiled, a hurt look on his face. “Fine, I’ll leave you alone, I can take a hint…”

“Justin, no,” she sighed. “I didn’t mean it like that. I just… you’re with her, whatever you’re doing, I don’t wanna be caught in the middle of that.  As much as I like spending time with you, I think you shouldn’t be spending as much alone time with me. I didn’t mean it like that… I like hanging out with you, but you’re coming on a little strong for someone that’s in a relationship.”

Justin didn’t move, standing facing away from her. “What if I don’t wanna be with her anymore?”

“Justin, I’m flattered, but…”

“You can’t look past my reputation, I get it.”  He started to clench his hands.

“No.  That’s not it. You’re a great guy, I’m glad we have this thing going. But I’m not ready for anything right now.”

“So what you said about getting over your ex…”

“I do, but I also don’t want to jump into something with you. I care about you too much to mess this up.”  She was speaking honestly. She’d gotten to know him, the real him, and she’d opened up to let him know more of her, while still keeping plenty inside.  As much as she fought her developing feelings for him, she knew there was a closeness she didn’t want to lose by jumping into something with him.

“Who says you’d mess this up?”

“I like what we have, Justin.  I don’t have guy friends, so to have someone I can talk to about things, relate to like I do, I don’t want to lose that if you decide things won’t work out.”

“So you can’t let go of my reputation…”

“I see you changing, I do, but… it’s complicated.  I don’t want to get hurt or hurt you.  It would hurt too much to see you as often as I do if things didn’t work out.”

Justin looked at his watch.  “I think we’re out of time, I’ll see you around.  I need some space…”

“Justin,” she called after him.

She watched him walk away, her heart sinking at the thought of disappointing him.  If it wasn't for JC, she’d be welcoming his attention, even though he is still with someone else.

She grabbed lunch alone, eating quickly before her last class.  She went to the coffee shop after class, doing more reading for classes.  She felt like her phone was burning a hole in her pocket, wanting to text Justin but knowing he likely wouldn’t answer.  Guilt was eating at her, knowing she was hurting him, but to also save him from being hurt more.  She was already afraid of getting too close to him around JC.  

Part of her wanted to continue walking and sitting with him just to see what JC would do, knowing the incredible sex they’d had earlier that day, what was ahead of her when she got to his place that night.  But she didn’t want to use Justin like that, it wasn’t fair to him.  If JC knocked a guy out for hitting on his girlfriend, what would he do with something worse?  Then again, they weren’t even supposed to be together, so she really could explore things with Justin and JC couldn’t do anything.  He might take it out on her in the bedroom, but to assault a student for seemingly no reason would become increasingly problematic.  

I need to talk to him tonight, try and figure out what’s going on.  He’s married, I can’t just ignore that because we want each other.  Ugh, I need to get some studying in before who knows what happens tonight…

She continued studying, taking notes as she read when her phone buzzed.  She knew who it was without even looking, based on the time.  Sure enough, a few minutes later JC approached her table.

“Were my notes on Flatland helpful at all?” he asked, pretending to make conversation.

“Yes, and I’m taking smaller chunks instead of trying to read the whole thing in one go.  Once I start I can’t stop, but I’m learning to pace myself with these for class, not getting ahead of myself.”

He leaned close.  “I’ll get into the building and open the door for you.  Meet me in about 30 seconds…”

She watched him walk away and disappear beyond the glass of the coffee shop before she began to pack up her things and follow him.  She reached the door to his building, looking to make sure no one was looking as she approached the door.  He opened the door, taking her hand in his as they walked towards the elevator.  Once they determined no one was inside, they rode up together before going into his apartment.

She looked around, noticing the artwork and things for the first time, blushing at how she hadn’t really had time to do so before.  She saw a guitar in the corner along with an upright piano.

“You play in your spare time?” she wondered.

“What else would a musical doctoral candidate do?” he chuckled.  

“I heard you doubled on your MFAs, performance and composition?”

“I did, along with a double major for my BA.”

She smiled.  “You and Justin are more alike than you realize…  He can’t decide on which way to go.”

“Don’t compare me to him,” he said with a venom in his voice, disdain at being compared to someone else vying for her affections.

“We had a fight,” she said, sinking onto his couch.

“Oh?” he asked, intrigue and optimism in his voice.

“Don’t sound so excited,” she said.

“I want you for myself, so pardon my excitement that all isn’t well with the two of you.”

“He’s just a friend, but he has a reputation for being a player.  He’s seeing someone, but Maddie and I both think he might like me, and I kinda went off on him today that he should be with the girl he’s seeing, not so much with me.  He didn't take it well.  I’m really trying to save him from being hurt, because of what we have.”

“Which is?” JC wondered.

“I think you know,” she replied.  “Great sex, intelligent conversation, but not much else.  But with Justin, I can open up to him, tell him anything and he’s listening, engaging me in how I feel.  So I want to know how you feel, Josh, Professor.  What’s the deal with your wife?”

JC sighed.  “That’s complicated…”

“If you truly wanted this to be meaningful, you’d tell me, open up to me…”

“It’s messy.”

“More messy than me fucking my professor but having feeling for someone else?”

“You have feelings for him?”

“Maybe.  Not that I’ll admit to him, or anyone else.  At least not yet.”

“And me telling you about my fucked up marriage would keep you from acting on those feelings?”

“Yes.  Otherwise I just feel like I’m just someone for you to fuck.  As great as the sex is, I need more than that.  I’m not wanting a commitment, I’m sure that’s where you draw the line, but more than just sex.  Eventually one or both of us will get bored.”

“Very well.  If you must know, I was very much in love with a young woman while I was here, not that it matters.  My parents are generous donors to the school, ran in all the right society circles, and saw fit that I take over the family business when I was old enough.  My education was merely a formality to them, they had no intention of me actually using it.  Once I finished my undergraduate studies, my relationship was cut off by my parents and I was betrothed to a business partner.  They sought to use the marriage to merge the companies, eventually buying out her father’s company and making them quite a lot of money in the buyout.  However, neither of us wanted the marriage, being in love with other people.  My engagement and subsequent marriage ruined any chance I had at the happiness I had with the woman I loved.  We’re married only on paper, never consummating the marriage.”

“So why not get divorced?”

“I’m cut off without a dime if I divorce her, she’s cut off if she divorces me.  So unless one of us can afford to step away, we are stuck in this loveless marriage, seeing other people, until our parents die and our inheritances are transferred over.    We have paperwork drawn up privately that keeps our money separate in the event we commit to staying married.  Honestly, I would divorce her in a second, but it would break my mother’s heart, for some reason.  My father isn’t doing well health wise, so it appears I’ll stay married until my mother passes, instead of her passing first and me divoricng to spite my father and truly become my own man.”

“So you’re married just to make money in I’m guessing 20-30 years?  You both are ok with not being able to be married to people you actually want to be married to?”

“After all of this, even if we were to divorce tomorrow, I see no point in marriage.  I loved once enough to see it in my future, but now it’s poisoned.  I will be honest with you Genevieve.  Whatever I feel for you, I will never love you, especially not enough to hurt my mother.”

“So, what am I to you then?  Just something to fuck and talk to between fucks?”

“You’re my companion, someone I find intellectually and sexually challenging and intriguing.  I understand hiding things between us may get difficult at some point, but I will do my best to make this work for both of us.”

“You expect me to stay with you as your ‘companion’ because of great sex and conversation without love and emotion behind it?”

“I didn't say without emotion.  I feel jealousy and anger at that boy being around you, trying to steal you away, as if he could.”

“But nothing resembling love.  I don’t understand, what if your wife gets pregnant by some other man?”

“Wouldn’t matter to them if it can be kept quiet. She didn’t want kids, so I think we’re fine. If she did, all the more incentive to stay married, to have money for it.”

“Do you want children?”

“No. My childhood was too fucked up to want to give my children any of it.”

“What if I want kids someday?”

“It would end before we get that far. I guess I should have said this earlier, but the moment you feel anything besides lust, desire for me, more romantic, this is over.”

“Why is that?”

“It’s not fair to you.”

“So why continue this?”

“Because your body is practically trembling for me to touch you, make you feel good. It’s only been a few days and you’re hooked on the adrenaline rush you get, the endorphins that release each time you cum for me.”

“It also releases oxytocin, the love chemical, so eventually my own biology will betray me?”