Justin woke up the next morning, smiling as he held Mikayla in his arms.  He thought back to what she’d said the night before, about nearly missing being hit by a car.  The thought of losing her in any way, especially one so complete as death, terrified him.  He loved her so completely, his world as he knew it would be over.  He gripped her tighter, wanting to never let go.

“Careful, I’m carrying precious cargo,” Mikayla said softly.

“Let me change my grip then,” he smiled, one hand cupping her breast instead of her stomach.  “Better?”

“You starting something?” she wondered.  “I don’t really have the time this morning, I have a Mother’s Day thing at the school.  I get to actually go to one instead of observing as a teacher.”

“I can’t help it.  You’re having my baby, I remember how much sex we had while you were pregnant with the twins…”

“Exactly.  We didn’t have them yet, we had time and plenty of opportunity.  You weren’t touring, doing any movies, not the way you are right now with Trolls.  I know things are going to be crazy soon.  I’m due in October, the movie comes out in November…  Shit, I’m gonna look like hell on the red carpet…”

“You will be my radiant wife.  Have no doubts that as much as I spoiled you when you were pregnant with the twins, it’ll be doubly so now that this one is mine.  Whatever you need or want, I’ll get it for you.  You’ll get a massage the day of, I’ll get hair and makeup for you, an incredible dress, people will be in awe of the fact that you look incredible after having a baby.  Seriously, you might steal attention away from me.  I know I can’t stop looking at you…”

“You talk a big game, Mr. Timberlake.”

“You know I’m good for it, Mrs. Timberlake…” he replied, nuzzling her neck.

“I need to get dressed.  Can you pick up stuff for dinner tonight?  Honestly I think the kids will be fine with the leftovers from last night, so we just need something for us adults.  I can cook if you just make sure we have food.”

“Don’t we already have food?  Maybe make your chicken and spaghetti carbonara?  The kids like that, too.”

“You know I’m a sucker for pasta, fine…  Make sure we have a good wine to pair with it, not that I’ll have much…”

“Kay, it’s Friday.  That’s always pizza and movie night…”

“Shit.  Ok, I guess we go with that then.  Just get something more adult for us.”

“Why am I picturing a pepperoni pizza with one pepperoni in the middle as a nipple or a phallic shaped pizza?” Justiun laughed.  

“I’m sure there are places that would do it for the right price, but you know what I meant…” Mikayla smirked.

“Yeah, not sure JC or I’d wanna eat pizza that looked like wang…”

“Ooh, a pizza with a white cream sauce?” she teased.

“Fuck, had to go and sell me on that part, didn’t you.  You’re a dangerous woman, Mikayla…”

“Don’t I know it.  Part of my charm, really…”

Mikayla got dressed, opting for a flowy maxi dress and sandals.  Spring was in full swing, and she wanted to look and feel special for this big moment for her.  It probably seemed trivial, going to a little party at a preschool, but it was special because it was for Mother’s Day.  Being a mom was something she treasured, despite the rocky circumstances it all started under.  

Mikayla made sure the kids were ready for school, giving Justin hugs and kisses before they left.  They arrived at the school, Mikayla walking them into class as she always did.  

“Good morning, Ms. Maribel,” the twins said.

“Good morning Barb, Joshy.  Mom, if you’ll wait just a while out here while we get things ready…”

Mikayla stood outside, seeing the blinds for the classroom were drawn.  “I guess they really don’t want us seeing inside,” Mikayla laughed to another mom.

“I guess not.  Is this your first one of these?”

“Yup.  I can’t believe they start TK next year…”

“You’re doing TK instead of another year of PreK?”  

“Yeah, it makes sense based on their birthdays, they don’t really nap much anyway.  They’re so smart…”

“Every parent says that about their child.”

Mikayla wasn’t about to get into it with this woman, fighting back words.  “If they aren’t ready, we'll do what’s right for them.  Based on right now, we think they’ll be fine.”

“If you say so.”

“Maribel has given us every indication that they’re ready.”

“I believe you…”

Mikayla stopped talking, preferring to stay silent than get into it more with this woman. She took out her phone instead. 

Just about punched a bitch trying to say the twins can’t handle TK next year…

Struggling to not go full Mama Bear mode, aren’t you?

Yup. Don’t wanna cause a scene, but doubting we know what’s best for the twins… ugh. It’s not like we’re using my position in the school or your celebrity to get them into Kindergarten early. They’re doing PreK right now, they’ll need the rigor and challenge of TK next year.

We’re doing the right thing, baby.  I love you, see you when you get home. JC texted me, he’ll be here before you get here.

Get some early drinking in before the kids?

And clear the air between us, yeah. Stuff we need to say to each other face to face, not even with you around.

I’m not gonna walk in on a Joshtin moment, am I?

If you mean anything sexual, no. If you mean boring and being best friends and stupid shit, then probably…

Love you, see you later. 

She put her phone away, the door opening to reveal streamers hanging in the doorway for the moms to walk through. 

The room was full of paper flowers all over the walls, the back counter full of goodies and drinks. They’d put the tables together into a u shape to have the moms sit at, the chairs low to the ground compared to the chair the teacher had for herself.

Mikayla found her seat, seeing two laminated papers with “facts” about her the kids had filled out.  She smiled that they put that she was under 20 years old. She pulled out her phone, snapping a picture and sending a text to Justin and JC.

Is this a sign I have a problem? Barb had put that her favorite drink was wine, Joshy had put Mommy Juice.

Well, won’t be having that for a while, so I think we’re ok, Justin sent back. 

My kinda woman, JC replied. 

Shit, we have a group chat already? Justin typed. 

We had one years ago, I guess it picked up where we left off. Mikayla scrolled through the texts that had been sent years before, when life had been less complicated and messy. Things were good, but she wondered if they could ever get back to what they’d had.

JT- Pizzas have been ordered, pick them up on your way home?

M- Lazy, fine… love you

JT- Love you too. 

JC- Love you too.

JT- Oh shit, this is gonna get awkward fast, isn’t it? 

M- Doesn’t have to be. Maybe I won't say that in the group chat from now on, save that for personal threads.

She opened a separate text chain with JC.  I do love you, so I’m glad you responded that way instead of assuming it was meant just for him. 

JC- I’m curious how this is all gonna work, but it’ll be worth it to have you in my life again. 

The group text thread popped back up. 

JT- are we ignoring the fact we’re sleeping with a teenager?  I’m sure Kay is glad they didn’t say she’s like 100…

JC- had to go and make it more awkward…

JT- you know me :)

M- can I change my mind on this?!

Justin sent her a private text. Really? Gonna joke about leaving me over that comment?

M- tonight is gonna be fun, I can tell. We’re just texting and it’s already awkward… Gotta go. Love you

She stuffed her phone away, ready to see what the twins would do with the class. They grabbed little pictures from the teacher’s desk, standing in front of the classroom holding up the pictures. 

Each child said something about their mom, something they do together. Barb and Joshy spoke in unison. “Our mom loves to take us places.”

She thought of the places they’d gone, more so because of Justin, but the things they’d do when they couldn’t travel with him. Then she thought of how things would change with JC. He traveled far less, and how would that work? Would he want the twins to go to Florida to see his family? Would he want to have the twins while Justin toured if she wanted to go with him?  Things were becoming more complicated than she initially realized. 

The twins joined her at her seat, getting her to have some goodies on the counter. She grabbed a blueberry muffin, some fruit, and made herself some tea.  The twins got half a muffin and some fruit.

Joshy went over to the table next to Maribel’s desk, getting two bags. “I brought Barb’s, too.  These are for you, Mommy.”

The bags had colored coffee filter flowers on the outside, with handprint flowers with a poem on the inside. 

“They’ll go up on the fridge tonight. I love them, thank you my babies…” she said, fighting back tears as she took them both in her arms for a hug.

She enjoyed the rest of the time, leaving as the kids went outside for recess.  She drove to her office, wishing she could have spent more time with the twins.

She sat at her desk, dealing with any emails she had before looking at her phone. She scrolled through the messages in her group chat.

JT- I MAY have started the drinking a little early…

JC- Justin, it’s 9am!!

JT- you telling me you wouldn’t drink to call ur nerves if your girl’s ex was back in the picture?

JC- T, come on…

JT- just one drink, so far

JC- do I need to come over sooner to babysit you?

She smiled at the banter between them. 

M- I realized just how complicated this is all going to be.  Tours, vacations, things like that…

JC- we’ll talk through as much as we can tonight 

JT- I’m ok with whatever.  C, if you want open custody to see them whenever you want, that’s fine by me. They know a lot about you, so if they feel comfortable being with you, with or without Kay or me, and you’re good with it, let’s do it. I never wanted to keep them from you, we just needed you to know, and it never seemed like a good time. Didn’t wanna tell you during an argument, ya know?

JC- I get it, I do. Do I wish I’d had all that time with them? Yeah. But it’s my fault I wasn’t wanting to talk to either of you for a long time. I wouldn’t have been this receptive to the news until now.  It still feels very fast, but I guess that’s how you guys felt once I was out of the picture and you were pregnant and scared.

JT- terrified

JC- not you, Kay, idiot…

M- be nice, boys… we’ll talk after the kids go to sleep. 

JT- I knew who you meant. We were both terrified. Her of being alone, me of losing her to you, or her not wanting to be with me.

She switched to her private chat with Justin. 

M- Justin, we’ll talk tonight. That’s all in the past, for better or worse. I have no regrets on the choices I’ve made. I feel bad about sleeping with JC, but at least now he knows about the twins, we can move forward.

JT- you want to fuck both of us…

M- it’s not something I’d put quite like that… but yes. 

JT- I’m not enough for you

M- Justin, you know that’s not true. You’ve given me chances to leave, and I’m still not leaving. You’re more than enough, but… it’s complicated.

JT- I don’t want to share you, Kay.

M- I don’t blame you. I can’t pretend that JC doesn’t mean anything to me. He’s the father of my children…

JT- not all of them. 

M- I’m not leaving you. I know we have our angel baby and are almost halfway in with this one.  I love you, but I love him too.

JT- I never thought I’d be in this situation. I maybe pictured me in an open relationship, before us, but not sharing you with someone in an open relationship.  Not even JC.

M- this isn’t easy for any of us. JC feels bad that he’s gone this long without knowing his kids, that we could’ve been together. I can’t imagine hurting either of you, even though this is doing just that.  We’ll talk later tonight. I love you

JT- love you too. I’m calling dibs right now. Or should that go in the group chat?

M- dibs?

JT- I’m sleeping with you tonight. I don’t care how many years it’s been, I’m not letting him have you tonight.

M- whatever, you’ve clearly had more than one drink by now and I’m working, or trying to.  I’ll see you tonight.

She opened her private chat with JC. 

M- He’s not doing well, I think he’s had another drink already. This is hurting him and I hate it, but I can’t think of a situation where no one gets hurt. 

JC- how is this hurting him? He’s still your husband, you’re having his baby…

M- he doesn’t want to share me, not even with you. As often as he’s told me I could leave if this ever happened, I don’t think he expected to ever actually be in this position. I think he’d rather divorce me than go through this.

JC- that’s for you two to figure out. I just know I’d rather have this than not have you at all.  I lost you for too long as it is.  We should have been raising the twins together, and I’m sorry I put you through this.  

M- you didn’t know, and now that you do you’re stepping up. 

JC- I should’ve been less of an asshole and given you times to tell me, or not have deleted that voicemail in the first place…

M- but you did, and now you’re trying to make things right. That’s all I’ve ever wanted…

JC- is it all you ever needed?

M- I guess so, cuz I want you back.  Wow, can’t believe we just did that…

JC- just don’t tell anyone else, lol

M- I’ll see you later. Love you, Josh

JC- love you, Kay

She put her phone down, getting work done the majority of the day.  She was looking into workshops and things for the music staff to do over the summer, programs and things that might better serve the students.  

She left work to pick up the twins, stopping by the restaurant to pick up the pizzas.  The twins smiled as they were each handed a small paper bag with goodies inside.

“You always have something to give them,” Mikayla smiled.  “Thank you.”

“They’re good kids, it’s our pleasure.  I just hope we made the right choice.”

“What is it this time?” Mikayla wondered.

“Paw Patrol…”

“Definitely the right choice.  Thanks again.”

They got back into the car, the pizzas resting on the front passenger seat as she drove.  The smell was a mix of the pizzas, Mikayla trying to figure out what each was.  There were 4 pizzas, where normally they only had 2, one for the kids, and one for her and Justin.  She could guess what one of them was, maybe 2, but she was lost on the others.

She pulled the car into the garage, the twins unbuckling themselves and running into the house.  Mikayla closed everything up before walking into the house.

Justin looked at the twins as they ran into the family room.  “Barb, Joshy, this is JC.  Can you say hi?”

“Am I really named after him, Daddy?” Joshy asked.  Justin and JC gave each other a knowing look.

“Yeah, buddy, you are.  I’ve known him since I was 12…”

“You were on a TV show together?” Barb asked excitedly.

“Sure was,” JC laughed.  “Left nothing out, did you?”

“Blame Mikayla.  She got a collection of over 100 DVDs, which is really closer to 200 when you put everything together as far as the discs of MMC…”

“Did you ever meet Mickey?” Joshy asked.

“Yeah, we got to go to Disney World pretty much whenever we wanted when we weren’t filming…” JC replied.

“That’s SO COOL!” Barb shouted.

“I told you they like you,” Mikayla sighed as she put the pizzas down on a kitchen counter close to the family room.  “Kids, you know the rules.  You get milk or water with dinner.  Go pick what you’re gonna have.”

“What movie are we watching, Daddy?” Barb called out.

“I think we should let JC pick, seeing as he’s our guest,” Justin said.

JC walked over to their literal wall of DVDs, trying to find something he hadn’t seen in a while, and something he thought the kids would like.  “Toy Story?” JC offered, holding up the DVD case.

“YAY!” the twins shouted in approval.

“They’d have been just as excited about anything else, because it’s you.  With us, it’s like this is a chore, not something fun.  I swear they’re 4 going on 14, already bored of us…” Justin sighed.

“That’s what I told him,” Mikayla agreed.  “The 4 going on 14 part.”

Mikayla laid the pizzas out on the table, opening them up.  The twins got a cheese and olive pizza, there was a pepperoni and sausage pizza, then there were two she couldn’t quite place.

“Chicken bacon ranch and a pesto pizza with mushrooms and sun dried tomatoes.  I thought you’d like those, give us some variety,” Justin said, looking at the confusion on her face.

“You did joke about one with a white cream sauce,” she smiled.

“I don’t even wanna know, do I?” JC chuckled.

“After the kids go to bed,” Justin laughed quietly.

They ate pizza as they watched the movie, probably having more than they should have.  The twins fell asleep before the end of the movie, stomachs full.

“C, you wanna take one of them and help me put them to bed?” Justin asked.  JC nodded, picking up Barb as Justin got Joshy.  

JC couldn’t help but stare at the little girl in his arms.  His daughter, a carbon copy of her mother.  He glanced at Joshy, almost an exact carbon copy of him when he was younger.  They put the twins in their beds, covering them up with blankets.  Justin turned on the night light and closed the door to their bedroom before they rejoined Mikayla.

“Barb looks just like you, Kay.  It’s uncanny.  And Joshy, I mean, it’s a trip.”

“Tell me about it.  Having a son that looks like the father he doesn’t know…”

“That’s not fair, Kay.  I had no clue they even existed.  I thought they were yours and Justin’s…”

“I know, and you’re here now, but still.  It hurt for a long time, Josh.  Even once I knew you had no idea.  I wanted to tell you so many times over the years, but I knew it needed to be face to face so you couldn’t just ignore me anymore.  But every time we’d see each other, it was emotionally charged and it would’ve come out angry, not something to be happy about.  It would’ve been more ammo against you.  And someone would’ve heard, it would’ve ended up everywhere…”

“OK, it’s time we hash things out,” Justin said firmly.  “I”m going on the record that this is a bad idea.  People will find out, it’ll be a PR nightmare…”

“You know that’s not why you’re against this, T.  For the same reason as me.  You want her to yourself.  We’ve both had her, any we still want her.  She wants both of us.  She’s said she’s not leaving you, but are you willing to leave her because of this?”

“You're asking me to leave my wife, the woman YOU abandoned?”    

“No.  Not at all.  I’m genuinely curious if this is a dealbreaker for you.  That if she really wants this, that you’d step away even if she wants to stay married to you, have your child together.”

Justin sighed.  “No.  I love her too much to let someone else raise my son.”

“T, I didn't even know!  Maybe this is a bad idea, if I’m going to get guilt trips and we can’t move forward, even for the twins.  If I’d known all those years ago, I would’ve stepped up, you know that.  I know this is messy, emotionally charged, but we both love Kayla, she loves both of us.  If you’re willing to walk away because it’s too hard, then fine.  I’m willing to take this offer, whatever it may be, so I have her in my life, can make up for the years I fucked up.”

“I don’t want to lose her.  I can’t even begin to imagine feeling this way towards someone else.  I understand why you weren’t with anyone else, C.  I love her too much that I can’t let go.  I’m not gonna keep you from your kids either, I’m not that shitty.”

“You at least get the full package.  She’s your wife, you’re having a baby together. The twins will always see you as Dad, even once we tell them the truth, eventually.”

“I wanna tell them soon,” Mikayla sighed.

“What?!” both men gasped.

“I was at the Mother’s Day thing today, and I realized now that until they know, JC is gonna get the shit end of the stick.  You’re finally aware that you’re a dad, but you get nothing for Father’s Day from your twins.  That’s not fair.  I know they’re still little, but JC has missed out on the previous ones, I want him to be included moving forward.  That's part of why we named him Joshy, and told them stories and things about you, so they’d feel like they knew you in case we ever reconciled, at least as friends, let alone whatever this is going to be…”

Justin picked up the laminated questionnaires the twins had done for Mikayla.  He smiled.  “Did you see Barb’s answer to what you do when she’s at school?”

Mikayla took it from his hand, Justin sitting down next to her, Mikayla between the two men.  She stifled a laugh.  “I have fun with Daddy…  I still remember the zinger from last year for my birthday.  ‘Daddy loves giving you presents cuz I keep hearing you ask him ‘give it to me, Daddy…’”

JC just about spit out his beer, choking it down before laughing.  “Wow, she’s definitely observant…”

“Part of why she’s 4 going on 14. The attitude for sure, but she understands more than she probably should, they both do. That’s why I feel like keeping the truth about JC from them is only going to hurt them the longer we wait.”

“She has a point. I mean, we’ll work with lawyers to give you open custody, have everything very fluid between us on who they are with.”

“I was thinking today, how will we handle things like vacations. It would be weird to have me go on trips with JC, alone or with the kids, but weirder still for JC to take them alone.”

“We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it.  If it’s easier, I can have my family fly out here or something.  You can take the twins to Disney and after see me and my family.  I feel like we can keep this quieter than you think,” JC said.

“I have my own jet, this can all be very discreet as far as that all goes. Ok, are we ready to really hammer this out?”

“I think it’s time, yeah…” JC sighed.