“So, what brings you to my office for this session? Tessa asked.

“Well, I don’t know if you heard, but the secret is out that JC is the twins’ dad.  We were on vacation, trying to have a lowkey afternoon at a park, and the next day the story pops up online.”

“I had heard something about that, but only because I have a Google Alert for both of you,” Tessa said, pointing to JC and Justin.  “As clients, I want to see what is out there about you.  Most of it is honestly just rehashing things in the past, very little is current things you’re doing.  That way I’m at least a little informed ahead of time.”

“Except it’s someone else’s point of view, not our experience,” JC chided.

“Very true,” Tessa admitted.  “So, is that what you want to discuss?  That people now know JC is a father?”

“No, but I’m starting at the beginning of all of this,” Justin said.  “We were all on vacation in Florida, making things work as far as alone time with Mikayla.  I got to have her to myself while in Tennessee and a few days without the kids in Montana.  That’s when I started getting nervous.  In Tennessee, I started worrying that the twins would start to like JC more, being their real dad and all.  That time away from me and being with him would make them love me less, somehow.”

“Understandable,” Tessa mused.

“Then I started to get more jealous of JC, knowing he’ll have her to himself while I’m away doing promotional stuff for my new movie.  I liked having her to myself, like before, but then I’d remember things have changed.”

“Do you feel like she loves you any less, Justin?” Tessa wondered.

“No, but at the same time I worry that someday she will.  I know she’s said she loves me more than him, even if it’s just a little, but that the longer this goes on, that will change.”

“We’re having a baby, Justin,” Mikayla said.

“What if something happens?” Justin quickly responded.  “After we lost our first, I started to wonder whether we were meant to have kids.  So as much as you’re banking on us having Silas…”

“You worry something could still happen, and you lose the one thing you feel is tying your wife to you,” Tessa chimed in.  Justin nodded, putting his head in his hands.

“I almost lost you after the miscarriage.  You were so into your depression, then taking off to drive to my folks… I guess I worry that losing another baby would really do it this time.  That I’d lose you, for good.  You’d still have the twins with JC, and I’d have nothing.”

“Justin, even if something were to go wrong, I would still love you.  In fact, I think this time it could make us stronger.  Not that I want anything to happen, but if it did…  Everything is on track, he’s healthy, I’m healthy, nothing is going to happen…”

“You can’t promise that, Kay.  I’m not going to be convinced until after he’s born, maybe the first year, you just never know.”

“Or you could die tomorrow, or me… Justin, we can’t live out of fear.  I know we’ve been through this before and it didn’t go well, but this time won’t be the same.  I can feel it.  Why would we get this far, only to have it go poorly?”

“You really think I’d be ok with her leaving you after losing a second baby?” JC asked.  “I’d be there to support and help you through anything that would happen, not steal her away during a terrible time.”

“Like you think I did with your breakup?” Justin spat.

“That’s in the past.  You’re projecting based on that, T…”

“Gentlemen,” Tessa said, clearing her throat.  “Justin, there is a bit of projection, so JC is right in a way. That being said, it wouldn’t be unusual to feel the way you are, given how things started between you and Mikayla, and already losing one child together.  You know that she loves you, but you still doubt her commitment to the marriage if the two of you have no children together?”

“It would make more sense, then being together and raising their family together.  I guess I keep waiting for her to go back to him, knowing that I’m not the one she was meant for…”

“Justin,” Mikayla sighed. “I know back when this all started that you felt that way.  You really think we’re not meant to be together, forever?”

“You’re my person, Kay.  Always have been, always will be.  But JC is yours. I see how you look at him, like I’m not even in the room.  I can’t keep up with that forever.”

“Justin, do you see the way I look at you?  You see what you want to see.  You were the one I dreamed about marrying when I was younger.  I may have met JC first, and he won me over, but I was in love with you first.  Maybe not in love with you the way I am now, but you’ve made a lot of my teenage dreams come true.  I never thought I’d end up Mrs. Justin Timberlake, but here I am, and we’ve gone through too much together in the last 5 years for that to mean nothing to me.  As much as JC means to me, you’ve given me so much that I can’t turn my back on.”

“I’m curious why I’m involved in this,” JC wondered aloud.

“Because you need to be aware of his feelings regarding all of this,” Tessa said.  “If you don’t know, you can’t work together to help smooth them out and work through them.  Communication is key for any relationship, whether romantically with Mikayla or between two friends.  May I say it was good to see you with all the guys for your birthday, JC?  I hope you had a good day.”

“It ended in a sour note, but I tried to keep that quiet and ignore it.”

“What happened?” Justin asked. “You said something with Autumn? Kay didn’t tell me last night when we got home.”

“Well,” JC sighed. “She knew about the twins, and didn’t tell me because she didn’t want me to get back with Kayla. It really came as a surprise, that if it had been anyone else in the same situation, I’d be married with a kid right now. But because it was Kayla, she just wanted me to move on, not even tell me that I was going to be a dad.”

“Wow, I’m so sorry, JC,” Tessa replied honestly. “I imagine that has really hurt you.”

“She’s one of my best friends, and I feel very betrayed.”

“Is this a friendship you would like to continue, if you can move on from it?  You have every right to be upset with her keeping that from you.”

“The guys all knew about the twins, and didn’t tell me because they knew it should come from Kayla. She’d tried to tell me, and I wouldn’t listen when they would tell me to talk to her…”

“Autumn was my last line of defense, or so I thought. I’d gone to your house, left that voicemail like you asked so I wasn’t screaming it through the intercom. That’s what I should have done. I could’ve just pressed the intercom one last time and told you I was pregnant. Whether you believed me or not.”

“I turned the volume off once I told you to leave me the voicemail, I wouldn’t have heard you anyway.  I screwed up in so many ways in not letting you have a chance to tell your side.  I was so quick to assume, and stubborn not to listen to you or Justin.”

“So I called Autumn, told her, and asked for her help. She said she’d try.”

“She only told me to move on.  Nothing about anything in talking to you about things. Just that I needed to move on if she was going to betray me like that.  Little did I realize who was really betraying me…  I feel blindsided.  Autumn would have told me to get my head out of my ass and talk to you, even if she never told me herself the reason why.  Instead she told me to move on, like the last few years of my life with the woman I loved meant nothing.  That’s part of why I acted the way I did, she was that bug in my ear whispering to me that I should be mad at both of you.”

“It’s funny though, she said she was glad that you were in their lives now.  You said she’s a mom now, but clearly her idea of me never changed even after having her own.  One would hope that after having her own, she’d know how important it was for you to know the twins.  So for her to not tell you, even being a parent herself, she must have hated me, just put up with me because I was your girlfriend…”

“She never told me she didn't like you.  Maybe because we had been together a while before you met her, we were already pretty established that I wouldn’t break up with you because my best friend didn't like you.  I wish she would have said something though, so I wouldn’t have basically, unknowingly, forced her to be around you.”

“I’d be curious to know what she didn’t like about me,” Mikayla thought aloud.

“Me too, cuz I mean, I love you, so what could she have seen that to her was bad enough to not want me to be with you?  I even asked her for ideas on how to propose, not that those ever came to anything.  Maybe she’s why, is that she was trying to be a good friend, but never wanted me to go through with it.  Maybe I’m better off without her, if she didn’t want me being with the person that made me happy.  Justin, I’m sure you’re thankful for it, though…”

“Hey.  I won’t say I didn't benefit, but for a while I would’ve been fine with you two being together.  As much as I wanted her, seeing you and her both that happy… I guess that’s why I figure things with me were never meant to last, because I knew how happy you made each other.”

“You’ve made my life just as happy, Justin.  I hope you really see that,” Mikayla said, putting a hand on his thigh.  “I’d do anything for you, both of you.  As much as I thought JC was my person once things started romantically, you are the one I saw myself with as a fan, and opened myself to in the aftermath of the breakup and everything.  I have no regrets about how things ended up.  As much as it would have been nice to be married to JC and be a full family, being with you has shown me love without fear and conditions.  I know this isn’t ideal, but it’s the happiest I've been, no longer keeping a secret from JC, while still being married to you and having a family of our own.”

“You have perfect timing, because I feel this has been a very productive session, and our time is up,” Tessa said as her time went off on her phone.  “I think there’s more discussions to be had on these different topics, and plenty of ways to deal with them.  I really hope I don’t hear from you for a while, that everything is well communicated and harmonious. JC, my apologies again about your friend. If you feel you need a follow up, please don’t hesitate to call.  I hope whatever you decide to do makes you happy.”

“Thank you. It’s a lot to think about, that’s for sure.”

They left the office, each heading home.  JC’s stomach rumbled, driving towards a quick bite to take home. He had a lot of thinking to do, and couldn’t do it on an empty stomach.  He grabbed a sandwich and chips before heading home. 

He made the final turn towards his house, his eyes widening as he saw a familiar woman waiting by his front gate.  He parked his car, getting out silently.

“Hey,” she said tentatively. 

He grunted at her.

“JC, come on. I’m sorry…”

“Is that all you came to say?”

“We should talk.”

JC sighed. “I guess we should.  Come on in, Autumn.”