I don’t know what came over me.  But I don’t care.  I wasn’t going to let a fucking lime keep him from really doing what I want and what…dear god, what he wants.   I can tell he’s been wanting it.

His lips are wild against mine and I can hear people whistling and hollering behind us, around us, but I don’t care.  He tastes like tequila and Justin, that same ‘Justin’ taste I fell in love with this afternoon, well the tequila wasn’t there but whatever.  Oh my god, he tastes like heaven and his hands are pushing me into him almost too hard, almost too close.

But I don’t care.

My back is almost bent over the counter and his body is pressed, leaning into me.  I can feel him, hard and long against my stomach.  God he’s so hard.  I can really feel it against me. 

Shit, shit, shit!  It’s too much.  I’ve wanted this for too long and I got a tease, just a little taste, this afternoon and now….now I’m going to fucking have him.

I feel like my body might explode.  I feel like I might cum, right here, right now, in front of every fucking person.

I moan against his mouth and he keeps one hand on the small of my back and plants the other one against my neck, holding me right there against his lips, sucking and licking and biting and fucking my mouth with his tongue.

God if I could orgasm off a kiss I would right now.  Right now, oh god, I just might.

His lips rip away from mine and he leans down and says into my ear huskily, “Come on…”  And he grabs my hand and I don’t care that people are yelling at us or that they know we’re about to go off and have sex.

Because what the hell was that idiotic shit I said before about us going slow? What the fuck was that?  I was stupid and drunk.  But not anymore.  Well, I’m still drunk.  But I’ve wizened up.

I’m fucking this man tonight.  Damn the consequences.  I’m having him in me.

He holds my hand tightly and I follow behind him, hugging onto his arm almost.  I look down, our hands are clasped and kind of near my crotch.  Shit, I hope he touches me down there, his long fingers wet and sliding against and then deep, deep inside, curving, palm right against my clit.

Yes….

He seems to know exactly where he’s going and heads straight for the steps and marches up them, pulling me along.  I struggle to keep up and have to run after his long strides, still holding onto his hand and arm.

Upstairs is quieter, not as many whistles, or hollers, or people talking or the thumping music.  It’s still there but muffled, quieter, echoing just slightly but lowly…like a hum.

There’s no one up here and all the doors are shut.

I take a breath and open my mouth to ask him…something, anything, I’m not sure what.

But he turns and is so quick I don’t even know what’s happening until my back is up against the wall and his hands are against my sides moving up, over my breasts, just brushing against them until his fingers touch my face and he’s kissing me, rubbing his lips against mine and smiling against my smile.  He pulls back, his eyes lowered and gentle.  He breathes out and I can almost taste the beer and tequila from his breath.

His head tilts to one side and he opens his mouth against mine, kissing me thoroughly and deeply, his hands still against my face.  He pulls back sucking on my lip and then he smiles at me.

I…I can’t.  God…. I can’t handle this.  I feel out of control and wild.

I feel…

“I want to have you tonight, Jessica.”

I gulp and try not to fall to the floor.  I feel weak.  I feel wanted.  I feel needy.

I feel achy and great and wonderful.  Fantastic is what I feel yet not completed.  And I need to be completed.  I need it.  I might die if I don’t get it.

I nod at him and hook my arms around his neck and smile when his hands grip my ass and he hoists me up against his long frame.  I laugh and giggle, holding onto him, watching him smile as he turns us and walks me down the hall a few steps, me clutching to him still.  He opens a door and we walk into Rich and Liz’s guest bedroom.  He slams the door shut by nudging it with his ass and we both laugh while he turns and locks it.  I reach over to the wall and flick on the light.

Only a small lamp by the bed turns on.

He’s got me still holding onto him and before I know it he’s leaned me over the bed, pressing my back into the soft, but slightly lumpy mattress.  His body hovers over me, pressing all his weight into my frame.  His crotch is pressed against mine and I can feel him there.  I can feel it and it fucking makes me want him.  So. Damn. Bad.

He props himself up on his elbows and smiles down at me. We stare.  It’s all we do.  It’s all we can do right now, is stare at each other.

And smile and smile and smile. 

I bite my lip and his eyes soften as he lays against me. “What happened to ‘slow’?”

“Fuck ‘slow’.  I want you.”  He smiles when I say it and presses his lips against mine.

Fantasy after fantasy.  Night after fucking night.  Fuck…

Month after month I’ve dreamt about this.  I’ve wanted this.  I’ve sat at work, sat in my car, sat on my bed, late, late at night, unable to sleep, unable to get off the way I want, completely unsatisfied and thinking, wondering what this would be like.  And months and months of wondering has done nothing to prepare me for the way his lips feel against my neck and the feel of his weight pressed into me, his hand, damn, his fucking hand on my thigh, pulling it up over his waist so he can rotate his hips just slightly into me, pressing, pressing so fucking good.

It’s not hard like it is in high school when you dry hump.  It’s there, oh god is it there, but it’s subtle.  It’s not an eager boy wanting anything to push against his hard dick, trying to get any friction no matter what it is.

It’s a man, a fucking sexy man who knows exactly what he’s doing to me, teasing me and himself, but holding back, easing both of us into it slowly.

I tilt my head all the way to the side and grip his hair in my hands, the tiny bristles I can barely grasp my fingers around, but I try anyway and I sigh his name.

His lips move against my neck, opened wide and shaping into words and smiles.  “I’ve wanted you for so long, Jess.  I’ve fantasized every fucking night about how this would be.”

Dammit, I have too.

I close my eyes and move my hands to his shirt and tug.  But he pulls back from me, not letting me start to remove him of clothing.  God dammit, it’s been building up since the moment we met and he’s not going to let me even undress him?  God I want this, we can do slow later.  We can make it last later.

But now, fuck, now I need him.

Deep, deep…fucking so deep inside me.

“Can we move?  I’m kind of hanging off the bed here.”  He laughs and I blush a little and he pushes himself off the bed and stands to his feet.  I knock off my flip flops and move back up against the head board of this bed.  It’s funny.  I’ve slept here many a nights in this tiny guest bed that’s got mis-matched furniture, a not-so-comfy bed, and hardly any decorations on the wall, as if it was just thrown together one day so they’d have a spare bed for friends.

But never did I think he’d be here with me, kissing me on this lumpy piece of shit guest bed.  Shit…

I never thought he’d be with me just fucking, taking…oh god…..taking his fucking shirt off over his head.  His wife beater underneath is gray and going up half way with his shirt and getting stuck under his arms.

God fucking dammit all to hell.

That’s it.  I’m done. 

He was right when he told me he worked out as a hobby.  Holy shit does he work out.  His arms, his chest, his abs, his…..everything.  The hottest man in the world is here, right here…with little old me.  Little old Jess and he’s going to fuck me. Me!

I’ve never, ever been more attracted to a man in my life.  I’ve never wanted a man this much in my life and I’ve never, ever been more aroused in my life.

This is my life.

He is my life.

It’s over now. 

He tugs his tank down back over his stomach and I pout a little but it fades when he crawls up on the bed over me, hands and knees working until he’s straddled me and I’m sunk down into the bed, smiling up at him, wanting him more than I could ever tell him with words.

Yet I still try, “I want to do this with you, tonight.”

He just smiles and says, “good,” before settling his weight in between my legs by nudging them apart with his hips and he leans over me and kisses me again, this time resting against one arm and elbow while his other rubs against my stomach during our kisses.  His palm goes down and under, under my material and then up…way up.

My lips part in a sigh when his long, warm fingers inch over my left breast and he holds it firmly, but softly, pressing his palm against the center, against the material over my nipple and massaging me there slowly. 

He pulls away from my lips and smiles above me, moving his hand to my other breast, feeling me as if he’s checking me out, making sure I’m up to his standard or something.  I almost laugh but then he says, “You’re so fucking soft….” And he presses against me down there, holding it, still doing that rotating thing but harder now. More firmly.

He removes his hand from my shirt and then sits up on his knees in between my spread legs.  He just stares down at me for a moment before running his hand over his head, smiling a lazy, drunk smile and saying, “God damn Jess…”

“What?”  I breathe, staring at his body, looking down to where his crotch is strained, tight, and I can see it, long and hard and…and wide against his thigh.  He’s big.

I almost giggle.  Shit he really is big.

He just shakes his head and reaches down to me, pulling me up by holding onto my upper arms.  I end up straddling his bent legs, his dick, hard and confined in his jeans, pushing up against my pussy, which I can feel.  God I can feel it wet, sticking against my thong and it’s bad.  It’s worse than ever before and I don’t care.

He’s got me straddling over his lap and he’s kissing me soft, using a lot of lip and a hell of a lot of tongue.  His hands are up the back under my shirt, pulling it up as he goes.  He smiles close to me and then traces his tongue against my lower lip before leaning in and tugging on it with his teeth.  His lips move down against the side of my chin and under my jaw.

I gulp when his hands grabs my rib cage against the sides of my body, holding my shirt up there.  He rubs his lips all the way to my ear, his cheek pressed against mine and he whispers, “Arms up.”

I oblige, willingly, happily, and he’s got it off, over my head and tossed against the floor in no time. 

I rest against him, my arms by my side, still straddling him, him still pressing.  But now his hands are on my ass, holding me against him firmly, our jeans pressed and rubbing, the friction deep and tight down there. 

Deadly.

He stares at my chest.  I’m wearing this black bra, lacey and see thru.

So yeah, I might have had some expectations and desires when I was getting ready tonight.   Can you fucking blame me?

He licks his bottom lip and slowly starts to smile.  He licks it again, tongue running just slightly back and forth against it and slowly he starts to bite that lip, nibbling it.  His blue eyes rise to mine.

“Are all your bras this sexy?”

I smile and roll my eyes a little.   “No, but tonight’s special.”

His hands grab my ass and I smile at how both his hands can grab a lot of me down there, that’s…that’s how big they are…and I’m not a flat-assed girl.

He leans in, still biting his own lip.  “Fuck yes tonight is special.  Tonight.  Tonight I’m going to make you feel so damn good, Jess.  We’ve wasted too much time and too many days shitting around with each other and tonight…tonight I’m going to fuck you and it’s going to feel….”

“Shut up.”  I whisper and I kiss him.  I can’t… I can’t take it any more and I grind myself down on him and suck his tongue against mine, gripping his head and holding him there.  My eyes are squinted and my body is tight, so tightly wound down on him.  Fuck I wish he was in me.

God I need him in me.  I’ve never, ever needed a man before.  I’ve always been able to take care of myself.

I’ve been doing it for so long.

But…but shit, I need him.

I tug up on his shirt and he rips his lips away for a moment and pulls off his wife beater. He easily tosses it on the floor and reaches back for me, his arms around my back pulling me in.

But I put my palms flat against his chest and push him back, giving us some distance. 

He pulls his head back and stares at me.

Not yet, Justin.  Just you wait.

And I just look.

And look.

My fingertips move down over his chest, brushing against his hardened nipples and then over his abs, over his navel, down, down… My fingers touching wherever my eyes scan, all the way down to the top of his jeans.  I look and see him still pressed against me and I can see just a slight tent there before my own body covers that area of him. 

I move my hands back up swiftly over the tight, taut muscle up to his shoulders and I raise my eyes and smile at him.

He’s staring, wide eyed, slightly open mouth, breathing hard.  “What?” He says in a whisper, almost as if he’s scared or embarrassed.  Maybe he’s more modest than I thought.

“You…”  I breathe out deeply and shake my head at him. 

“I, what?”

“This!”  I exclaim and laugh a little, still resting my weight against his lap, still feeling him right there, my hands still resting on his shoulders.  “You’re fucking…..”  I give up.  I can’t explain it to him in words how…how fucking sexy his body is, how it’s perfect, cut and trim and muscular…and…and just damn manly.

I love that, I love when a man is muscular and fit underneath his clothes, when he…he looks exactly, ex-fucking-actly as a man should. 

I just pull myself up tight on him and press the lacy material of my bra and the fullness of my breasts against his chest and I smile against him.  “I want you in me…..”  He sucks air in through his teeth and I lean in and kiss him, pulling back to whisper, “now.”

Our mouths attack each other and his hands grip my skin on my back moving up to my bra strap and fumbling only momentarily at the clasp before getting it unhooked.  I feel the tight material loosen around my shoulders and his hands move in between us, our lips never parting as I work to get my arms out of the straps. His hands move up under the material, cupping my bare breasts in them, rubbing his thumbs over my nipples so that I sigh and gasp.

I pull away.  I have to breathe.

But he doesn’t make it easy.  I toss the material over, wherever, anywhere and then hold onto his shoulders as his lips move to my neck and shoulder and then down and down.

He moves over me too, bending me back over his knees, holding me there with his hand and arms, bending me over him but not letting me rest back against the bed.  He looks up at me with deep, dark blue eyes, and smiles at me as his mouth moves down, hovering over my breast.

He smiles, staring at me, making sure I’m watching him as he leans down, licks his lips and closes them over the tip of my breast.  My eyes roll back in my head.  It’s…god it’s too much to watch and I grip his shoulders and hold on as he holds me and…and sucks me.  His tongue is now flat against my nipple, rubbing against it until the tip flicks the tightened peak.  Then he moves it around in a circular motion. God…

I can’t….

Shit.

I start whining and furiously rub and push my hips against his where the ache is spreading and growing down at the center of my core.  It aches and my clit is throbbing.  I can feel the blood pumping through me, all through me.

He doesn’t do anything to stop, only moves one hand up to my neck, the other still supporting me on the middle of my back.  I can feel how long his fingers are, how they are spread against my skin, and I start to think how good they’ll feel inside of me.

And I close my eyes and pant.  God I want them inside of me.

He moves his mouth over to my other nipple and starts to circle it with his tongue just like he did the other, and I whine and move my hands up to his head and gasp.

“Just-Justin, stop…”

He pulls back with a loud sucking noise and smiles at me, dragging out, “Yessss?”

“I want you to finger me.”  I pant and say simply.

He stares at me, gulps and then blinks.

“Ok.” 

He pulls me back up flush against him and I hold him, resting my cheek against his shoulder, feeling my breasts pressed against his warm chest and liking…no…no…

Loving the way it feels, sexy and comforting and …damn…. Perfect.

His hands move down my back and around my sides and I pull back and rest my forehead against his.  We smile at each other and both look down as his hands move over my stomach and down.

“Are you wet for me?”  He whispers and I nod, making his head move with mine.  I giggle and he just smiles.

His finger easily flicks the button of my jeans open and I watch his thumb and forefinger move down the zipper carefully.

He traces his forefinger over the black, lacy material there showing underneath my jeans.

I find myself panting.

“Wait...”  I say when his hands start to move in between the material of my jeans and my thong.

His hand pauses, then retreats a little, and he places it on my thigh.  He looks up at me and I take a breath and stare at him.

It’s…it’s too much and it’s too late.

Right now, right now I need this and I don’t need any more teasing.

It’s been…it’s been too long since I’ve had a man and I’ve spent too much time wanting this particular man not to just dive right into this.

I’ll have time to make up for all the foreplay later. 

Later…

But not right now…

“I want you.  I changed my mind…”  I lick my lips and scoot back from him a little and move my hand down, touching, gripping what I’ve wanted to touch for so long.  I thought I’d be scared to, that I’d be shy about it and giggle, but I don’t.  I grip him and hold him in my hand the best I can through the denim. “I want this.”

He groans, deep, deep from his chest when I touch him, and I palm him a little, pressing my small hand, trying to grip him through his tight jeans.

But…

But god damn he’s too thick.

Too fucking thick in his jeans, too turned on, too hard for me to even fucking grip him well.

I keep trying to grip him and finally move my eyes from where I was watching my hand to his lips and I kiss him hungrily, tasting him.  I want to taste him.  And I want to put his thick length in my mouth.  But later.

Later….

I suck on his lip and pull back, smiling, “Do you have a condom?”

He grins and slaps my ass playfully, making me jump.  “Girl you know after that kiss in the car today I came prepared for anything.”

We end up just smiling at each other for several moments and finally I raise an eyebrow at him and go, “Well?”

“Back pocket…”  He smiles and leans in and starts licking against my neck a little, small slow circles, sucking a little, not hard, not enough to make me get a bruise there, but enough to make my breathing labor.

I move my hand down his naked back to his back pockets against his almost non-existent ass. I grope him down there for a moment, feeling his lips laugh against my skin and finally I pull out his wallet.  “Wallet?”  I whisper.

“Mmmhmm.”  He moans against my skin and I pull back a little, making his lips pull from my skin, leaving my neck a little wet. 

I rest fully against him, his cock straining up against his jeans, pressing against my own. And I fumble clumsily with his wallet so much that he grabs it from my hands, unfolds it carefully, and pulls out from within where his dollar bills are a small grayish square.  He throws his wallet on the floor and holds the condom in between two fingers as he leans in and kisses me some more.

It’s deep and powerful and one of his hands leaves from where it was running up my side to the comforter and presses into it.  He leans over me and I push my back against the mattress and pillows and let him lean into me.

We never stop pressing.

His body settles with mine, laps still touching, my legs on either side of his, both of us cursing the denim, his chest pressed against mine, his lips open and rubbing against my own, our tongues sliding…

He groans and pushes himself deep into me. And it starts to happen.  He keeps kissing and kissing and pulls his body back and his hand works down and starts tugging at my already undone jeans.  I start trying to tug them off myself, moving my hands down to my waist and lifting my ass off the bed to push them down.

“Jess!”

I gasp and before I can get my jeans pass my ass, I flop back against the bed and stare up at him, our lips seared apart.  Did…

No, no.

I didn’t just hear that?  Am I hearing things?  That wasn’t him.

I blink and he’s staring down at me, just staring.

“Jess!  Are you in there?”  I lick my lips and Justin mouths, “It’s Rich.”

“Jess please!”  Rich is pleading and I don’t know why in the world he’d bother us right now.  I mean sometimes he can get all big brother with me but this is his cousin.  And why isn’t he off with Liz?

I suck in a breath.  No….no!  Nothing… Nothing, not a fucking thing is stopping this.

“Ignore him.  Pretend we aren’t in here,” I whisper to him, thankful the door is locked.  He nods and moves his head closer, his lips reaching out for my own.  Yes, I can’t wait to kiss him again.  This is really gonna happen…nothing is going to stop this.

“God dammit Jess!! Liz is sick!”  He yells and we both jump.  “We fucking had to call the ambulance!  Open the fucking door!”

 I don’t even blink before Justin’s off me.  It’s only a matter of seconds and he’s moving off the bed and pulling me up.  He’s breathing hard and so am I as he hands me my shirt.

It’s like I completely stop thinking. My shirt goes over my head, down against my body, his tank top is back on, and my jeans are buttoned and zipped. And it’s like I didn’t even think.

“Ambulance?”  I say to him and he just nods to the door and I unlock it.

I swing the door open and Rich is there, tears streaming down his face, bracing himself against the door frame looking up at us.

“Holy fuck,” I whisper and know immediately this is more than her just having too much to drink and throwing up.

Justin puts his hand on my hip.  He’s right behind me, saying, “Rich, what happened?”

“She…she…she won’t wake up!”

I gulp and look back up at Justin who sighs.  His crotch is lightly pressed against my ass with how close he’s standing to me, and I can feel him, losing it.  We both just lost it.

My best friend is….is sick or…or something worse.

And me and Justin, whatever had just happened is over.  Just like that.

And I….I can’t think.

I don’t know if I want to.