The end of my stay in LA came rather quickly, which also meant Justin’s birthday was just around the corner. Although 27 isn’t really a big deal, Lynn and Trace went all out planning a party for him which meant while they were getting everything in order I got stuck alone with Justin, not that I’m really complaining. On the day of Justin’s birthday (and the party), Trace and Lynn went down to the club to supervise the set up early in the morning and left the two of us to fend for ourselves until 8 that night.
“What are you wearing tonight Jay?” I yelled to Justin as he was coming into the living room from the kitchen and sat down on the other side of the couch I was on.
“My birthday suit!” I shook my head and turned on the TV to ignore him. We sat in silence watching reruns of NEXT for a few hours before Justin got restless.
“Wanna go out and do something for a while?”
“Like what?”
“I don’t know. We can shop for something to wear tonight. I’m just bored outta my fucking mind.”
“Where’s Jessica?” Yeah, she forgave him. Stupid broad.
“I’m not sure. When she called to say happy birthday she told me she had errands to run so she’d just see me tonight. Why are you asking?” I could tell something was off about his response but I decided not to question the birthday boy.
“No reason. I just figured since she’s your girlfriend she’d want to spend the day with you on your birthday. But I guess not." He laid across the couch, put his head in my lap, and clutched onto my thighs before sighing softly. I knew Justin long enough at the point to know that meant he was tired and ready for a nap.
“It’s cool. I’ve got all the company I need. To be honest, I’d rather be alone all day then go out tonight.” That’s when I knew something was wrong; Justin Timberlake never turns down alcohol and a party.
“Why, what’s wrong?”
“I bet you most of those people there tonight will only be there to say they went to Justin Timberlake’s party. They’re not coming because they care, they’re coming for bragging rights. I could pick a handful of people that I want and have a party here; I didn’t need to spend oober amounts of money for a club and whatever else Trace and Mom planned.”
“I’ll tell you what, the second you want to go let me know and we’ll be out of there faster than you can happy birthday. That sound cool to you?” Buckley came and sat down at my feet and covered Justin's face in spit with his abnormally large tongue.
“Yuck. Thanks for the birthday loving, but get out of here you big dummy I just saw you licking your ass. Now I have to go wash my face,” he joked with the dog who just stayed perched in the same place, “yeah that sounds good if we can escape without anyone knowing. Where would we go though?”
“You’re the birthday boy, not me. Wherever you want to go we’ll go. Alright?” He nodded his head in my lap and stayed quiet, I knew he was falling asleep so I decided to not bother him and let him sleep for a while. So much for wanting to get out of the house.
Stepping out of his Ferrari, Justin handed his keys to the valet and jogged over to my door to help me out before the creepy valet could. He smiled and looked down at the black tube dress and heels that I was wearing and nodded his head in approval.
“I know I told you this before we left my house, but you look fucking amazing tonight.” I smiled and looked at his black slacks, dress shoes, and the navy sweater he had on over a blue and black striped button up and nodded at him.
“You look pretty damn stunning yourself Mr. Timberlake. You ready to go get your ass kissed in there?”
“Only if you’re doing the majority of the ass kissing Ms. Gagliardi.” We made our way inside to be met with a loud roar of “Happy Birthday!” the second our bodies were through the doorway. Justin flashed a fake grin and pretended to be shocked by all of the people who were there to see him. I broke apart from him and found Rachel over in a corner already drinking while Justin chatted it up with his guests and showed off Jessica on his arm, who looked a hot mess if I do say so myself.
For most of that night I stood in the background as the best friend, talked to some of Justin’s relatives that flew out and hung around with my Uncle Johnny when he wasn't busy with the record executives attending the part. When I finally caught a glimpse of Justin, he was in the center of the club talking to JC and a few other people that I didn’t recognize. I was amazed at the 10,000 watt smile that was on his face when he saw Joey and Chris make their way over to him; in the years that I had known Justin he was always extremely happy when he was around his former band mates, they had been through so much together and they meant the world to him, though some people may not think so. It was an amazing sight to see him that happy again; they bring him happiness that even Trace and I can’t bring to him and he deserved to feel that way on his birthday.
It was so hard to fathom that it had been almost a decade since we met back at Uncle Johnny’s wedding; Justin’s father had made it out for his party and had mentioned that to me. When it was time to cut the cake and sing ‘Happy Birthday’ Trace made everyone shut up so we could toast to Justin.
“First of all, I just want to thank everyone for keeping their mouths shut about the details of the party, especially Joey and Chris since I know what big mouths you guys have,” everyone laughed before he continued, “but to the real reason why we’re here tonight, happy birthday Jay! You’re finally twenty seven, and damn we’re getting old. Who knew the two childhood friends from good ol' Millington would still be causing trouble around the globe at 27? I hope you’re enjoying yourself tonight. This is all for you man!” Trace raised his drink at Justin, and Justin did the same back at him before the two of the downed their full glasses of Jack Daniels.
“I know I said it earlier in the day, but happy birthday JayJay! I don’t know if any of you realize this, but it’s been almost 10 years since Justin and I were the awkward 15 and 17 year olds at my Uncle Johnny's wedding. We didn't really like each other all that much that day because Justin was a pompous ass because I was extremely under developed which I know is hard to believe,” when I said that a picture of us from Uncle Johnny’s wedding flashed on a screen that had been showing pictures of Justin all night behind me and everyone started to crack up at how hideous and miserable we looked together, “You’ve become an amazing person Jay, inside and out, and I’m glad to call you my best friend!” Trace hit me hard in my side, “Okay I’m glad to call you one of my best friends. Thank you for being there and taking me in a few years back so I could get on my feet, I’m sure I’d be somewhere selling my body on the corner if it weren’t for you. You’re 27 now, god damn you old man. I hope 27 treats you as good as 26 did. Make me proud of you again this year boy!” When I was done he came up on the stage and hugged me and whispered a thank you in my ear before going back down to where his uncut cake was. Everyone sang happy birthday and he was able to cut the cake and carry on with getting his ass kissed by people he’s never met before.
Towards the end of the night Justin was finally able to get away from his friends and family and found me in the back of the room sitting by myself. I had out my phone and had been texting away with Derek all night to keep me company.
“I know you’re not texting Derek on my birthday.” He sat down in the booth next to me and took a sip of my water, only to make a face. “What the fuck are you drinking water for?”
“I think I’ve had enough alcohol for the two of us in this past week, thanks to you, don’t you? And actually I am texting Derek, I don’t see the problem. You’ve been out there dry fucking your girlfriend all night." He brought his face really close to mine before glancing sideways to see if anyone was watching. When he was sure no one was looking at us he brought his lips onto mine for a quick, yet passionate kiss and pulled away. His touch sent shivers down my spine and I’m sure he knew it from the way he looked at me when he was done.
“I’ve been dancing with Jess all night, but wanting to do that to you. Derek can’t do that, can he?” Told you.
“What is your beef with Derek? You don’t even know him and you’ve been talking shit about him since you found out we were sort of dating.”
“He doesn’t deserve you.”
“You don’t even know him to say that Jay. Who does deserve me if Kurt didn’t and Derek doesn’t?”
“They just don’t deserve you, okay?”
“And I'll ask it again, who does?”
“Look, it’s my birthday can we save this for another day? Let’s just go, okay?”
“I’m having fun actually. And Mama Lynn and Trace put a lot of effort into this, I’m sure they’d be crushed if you booked out early.”
“You’re having a good time? By yourself? Yeah fucking right LaLa. I’ve been watching you all night and since Rachel left you’ve looked miserable as fuck sitting here alone. I’m ready to go and you said we can leave whenever I want to. So let's bounce.” I grabbed his hand so he would shut up and slid out of the booth and lead him to the door. Nobody likes a complaining pop star.
I took the valet ticket from his pants pocket and went to get the car to bring it around back so we weren’t swarmed by people and their questions outside of the club. When I saw him come out of the back door we switched places so he could drive and he pulled out in the direction of his house.
“Where to La?”
“You’re the birthday boy, you pick.” He made a U-turn and went in the opposite direction we were going.
“So what’d you get me for my birthday.”
“I’ll give it to you when we get wherever we’re going. It’s not a Rolex or anything extravagant. What’s going on for later though?”
“I don’t need another Rolex or anything over the top, so thank you in advance. And what do you mean? Nothing is going on later.”
“I meant are you and Jessica doing something or…”
“Yeah we should talk about that, we’re not really together anymore because…” But he didn’t finish, and I didn’t ask. Instead of letting the silence kill me I turned on his IPod and let the music play. Ironically “Misery Business” started to flood through the speakers of his car; imagine the smile I had on my face listening to that song.
Soon enough Justin was pulling up near the beach and turning into a vacant parking lot. He came around to my side and opened the door up for me to get out. I grabbed the bag in the back seat on my way out and took his hand to brace myself to get out.
“Santa Monica Pier?”
“The beach, not the pier. I’m not down with being around tons of people right now if you haven’t noticed. We walked down to the edge of the beach and just stood there watching the waves and listening to the sounds coming from the people and rides on the pier. After standing in silence for a few minutes I picked up the bag at my side and handed it to Justin for him to open it.
“Happy birthday. I really hope you like its. It’s kinda corny.” He sat down in the sand and started to rummage through the tissue paper to get to the actual gift. When he pulled the book from the bag he looked at me awkwardly before opening it to see what was inside. I stood and watched him skim through the pages of the scrapbook and his look of confusion change into a bigger smile with each page until he was finally done.
“Wow. Thank you LaLa.” He held out his arms for me to sit in between his legs so he could wrap them around me in a makeshift hug.
“You like it?”
“I love it, and it's not corny at all. I can’t believe you have some of these pictures still.” Justin opened up to the first page and laughed at one of the pictures of the two of us from the wedding, the same exact one from the screen earlier. Instead of buying him something material, I spent countless nights staying up beyond my normal bed time to finish it in time for his birthday; it meant a lot to me to compile some of our memories into a book, and I was hoping it meant something to him too.
For like the millionth time that day we sat in silence and just enjoyed each other’s company. I had known at that point that my feelings for Justin were stronger than I had originally thought, but it didn’t really hit me until I was sitting in his arms on the beach. Watching him interact with all of those people at his party even if he didn’t want to made my respect for him raise to an astronomical level; he may not have realized it but Justin probably made the nights of so many of his guests.
That man had touched my life in so many ways I can’t even begin to describe them. I knew that nothing could come out of our weird relationship we had developed though; even though they weren’t together, he had Jessica and Derek was a new figure in my life that I expected to be there for a while. I didn’t fit into his world either; I couldn’t be the beautiful starlet that he was used to dating. I was a 24 year old girl who originated from Connecticut and hated LA, whose body was flawed and not to mention I’m biracial. Justin’s family and friends may have been accepting of me as a ‘black’ woman but his fans sure as hell wouldn’t have been the same. Hell, people were already talking shit about me when I was in public, imagine how bad it would have been if we were together.
“Would I be crazy asking you to move back out here?” I like to think it was the alcohol he consumed talking, but I knew he was being serious.
“Yes you would be.”
“Why?”
“I can’t just up and leave my students, house and family behind because you broke up with your girlfriend and want your fuck buddy close by so you can get off as you please.”
“Is that what you think you are? Just my fuck buddy? You of all people should know that I don’t use people for sex LaLa. I’ve told you before that I feel something between us.”
“Way to show it.”
“You know I’d do anything for you Alana. You know that you mean more to me than just getting off. I shouldn’t have to prove that you to for you to know it.”
“I just can’t leave my life behind because you want me to.”
“I’m not asking you to leave your life Alana. Just think about it okay? I’ll help you get your foot in the door out here. Don’t say no until you’ve thought about it. Please.” I felt his lips start to kiss on my neck and at that point I couldn’t even stay upset.
I know, I know. I shouldn’t have just let him kiss on me and have that be the end of everything, but it was the boy’s birthday for Pete’s sake. I didn’t pay 80 bucks for that Vickie’s Secret lace cami set to not wear it.
With Justin and Jessica broken up I knew things were going to heat up between us. A few days after Justin’s birthday I had to head back home to get back to work which was something I was really looking forward to. As much as I love being with Justin and Trace the East Coast is my home and my job teaching means the world to me. If my job in Jersey meant so much to me, then why was I seriously thinking about up and leaving?
