"Every woman should have her very own Richard Gere."

"What the hell?"

"I mean, look at him, he's so handsome. And he's really romantic with her, ya know?"

"Who are you?"

Calmly, not wanting to miss a second of the movie, I picked up a pillow and slammed it against Justin's face.

"Ow." He said deadly, tossing the pillow on the floor, "Okay, seriously, Trev... Pretty Woman? If I knew this was all it took to make you human I'd have done it six days ago."

"Justin, could you maybe shut... The fuck... Up? They're going to the Opera."

He chuckled, "We could go to the Opera."

"Oh please."

"You'd hate it anyway."

I shrugged. He was in a good mood. It had taken two Janet Jackson concert specials and Die Hard to get him there and I'd die before I put him back in a shitty mood tonight.

"We're watching XXX after this."

"I'd rather eat shit and die."

"I don't doubt that."

"I'll just go back to the dorm."

"On the bike? You have fun with that."

"God, Justin, we'll watch XXX, okay? SHUT UP."

"Oh, I'm Richard Gere, please, let me slam you fingers into a jewelry box and call it romance."

"He didn't slam her fingers, he nipped them. A subtle difference that braindead frat boys like you will never understand."

"I was never a frat boy."

"You would be."

"I'm not."

"Okay, Justin. Oh, oh my god! He did not... That is just..."

I squealed. I actually squealed. Richard Gere just did the cutest thing!

"Oh, my... God, you can't be serious. I don't even know you right now."

"I'm being compassionate."

"Yes, and I'm frightened."

"God, you must really think I'm some kind of super-bitch, huh?"

"I prefer ball-busting carnivore, myself."

I held my hand up, then used it to cover my mouth at a particularly touching scene.

"Oh man, I'll be in the bathroom throwing up."

"Enjoy yourself!" I cried, waving him out of the room.

Of course, since god is against me, the second Justin left the room somebody knocked on the door. This was the fourth time it had happened all night and Justin had always been the one to do the honors of cursing out whatever retarded girl had found out where he lived. He'd made it seem like so much fun that I actually wanted a crack at it this time.

I paused Richard, wouldn't want to miss anything, and cleared the popcorn, sofa and candy from my lap before hurrying towards the door. The second I threw it open, I regretted it. I didn't know how I knew, but this guy was no good. Not at all.

"Uh... We don't go to church, we don't like charities and we don't want any girl scout cookies."

"Trevion--"

You know how the sound of your name just catches you off guard when it comes out of a strangers mouth?

"Yeah? How did you know-- fuck, I forgot about the damn magazines."

"Is Justin here?"

He got right to the point, "I'm sorry, I don't know what you're talking about."

"I'm Trace, we've been best friends since we were this big and I'd really appreciate it if--"

"Shit."

"what?"

"Look, I know this sounds selfish, but I just got him to stop acting like an asshole and your being here is not going to--"

"Trev, close the door."

The sound of Justin's voice behind me was startling and the second I took to look back at him the guy on the other side barricaded his way in.

"Whoa! What the fuck!"

"Trevion, close the fucking door!" Justin screamed.

"Don't yell at me! Shit, he's in here now, anyway! It's about time you dealt with all of this, anyway, Justin!"

Justin took one look at Trace and it was like he couldn't decide whether to scream, laugh, or cry. So he just raised his hands in the air and turned away from bother of us, "FUCK!"

"Look, man. I'm here for you, alright? We're all back at home worried about you, man."

"That's bullshit." Justin spat, pointing at Trace.

Okay, Trevion, private moment, make a beeline for you shit and get the hell out of here.

"How is that bullshit, dog? I haven't done anything to you! I just want to be here for you."

"What about when JC was fucking Britney, huh? What about that?"

Trace looked just about as horrified as I felt, "I didn't know about any of that. Nobody knows what the fuck is going on. All we know is that we all woke up one morning and you weren't answering the phone. Nobody knew where you were. Lynne is going out of her fucking MIND, bro. What are you doing?"

With each sentence it was like a piece of Justin was being stripped away to reveal a new person that I didn't know. That I'd never met.

"I don't know... I don't know... Everything is just so fucked up and you can't be here."

"And what about her?" Trace asked, "Who the fuck is she?"

"Maybe you wouldn't mind taking your finger out of my face, Trace." My words rhymed and that only made me sound more smartassed. I relished in the look on his face.

"This is what you do? You disappear when shit gets rough, find some girl on the street, come home and watch Pretty Woman?"

What the fuck?

"Whoa! You don't even know me, asshole. For your information I've bent over backwards trying to get away from this crazy mother fucker."

"Oh, okay then." Oh, he was right up there with me on the sarcasm. I hated him for it.

"Whatever, I don't have shit to prove to you." No need to be quiet about it anymore, I hurried towards my stuff. It was time to go.

"No, Trev. Trace was just leaving."

"I'm not fucking leaving."

"Yes... You are."

"No... I'm not."

"Well, I'm definitely leaving, at least we know that much."

"I said don't go, Trev."

"I know, Justin! But you're not my fucking daddy for the fiftieth fucking time, alright?!"

Trace looked back and forth between us like he couldn't believe his eyes, "This is what you left for? This is why everybody hasn't been sleeping, worried sick about your ass? Some girl that don't even want you?"

"It's not like that. It's different."

"You need to come the fuck home, Justin."

"I'm not going back. Not ever."

I don't know why I felt a surge of pride for him. Why the thought of him actually leaving with Trace made me sick to my stomach.

"How do you guys even know each other? I'm so fucking confused, Justin."

Trace obviously had no idea what Justin had tried to do to himself not even a week ago and I was in no place to say. It actually made me feel in the better that I wasn't the only one that didn't know what the fuck was wrong with Justin.

"Well, I guess you're going to stay confused. Now Trace please get the fuck out before I have to call someone."

"So that's it? You're just kicking me out? I spent 500 dollars on the first flight I could get when I found out you were in Vegas and you're just throwing me out?"

Justin didn't flinch, "Yes."

"Justin."

"I just can't deal with this shit, right now, alright? God, shit was finally starting to go good..."

"In Vegas? You HATE it here, man! I don't understand this! You've always hated it here. You don't know any fucking body."

"That's what makes it perfect."

Those were the words that seemed to really sink in with Trace and when he stomped out, promising to be back, I went to follow him.

"Trev." Justin barely whispered the words but they stopped me right in my tracks.

When I looked back at him I knew there was no way I could say no to him.

"Stay."

After the door slammed closed Justin inched toward me like a scared young man. For a flicker of a second I could see the man I'd seen on the roof the first night. That scared the shit out of me. So much that I let him wrap his arms around my waist. So much that I grabbed him in my arms with the same desperation. I cared. God dammit, I cared so fucking much.

"I don't know how... To fix it." he whispered, burying his head in my shoulder.

"Fix what?" I whispered, desperately, "Just tell me, Justin."

I knew he wouldn't.

"I know this is the right thing to do. This is where I need to be. Here. With you."

I released him and looked up into his eyes. I was so close that I could see each time they sparkled with a new set of moisture, a new emotion. They spoke more than a thousand words.

"No, Justin. You belong in Los Angeles, with your family."

His hands squeezed against my waist and he didn't break my gaze, "Sometimes I wonder... How I could have tried to... To do that to myself..."

I shushed him, "We don't have to talk about that."

"I met you that night, Trevion, and everyday after that I just couldn't understand how I could have done that to myself when there are people... People like you out there."

I closed my eyes. Fuck. Don't say that. Fuck.

"You give me a taste for life. Nobody has ever done that for me. It's like, you made me understand why people want to live. Why they continue on even if they're lives are complete shit. How can I turn my back on someone that makes me feel that good?"

"It's not me, Justin. You're just saying that because I'm all you have. It's like a delusion. Shit, it is a delusion."

"It's not. You're the reason, Trev. You're the reason I'm standing here right now, and I'm forever thankf--"

"Justin... God..."

"I mean it, okay? Just take it, alright? Take it."

Alright, I'm taking it.

"Thank you."

I looked into his eyes and even though I hated it, I kind of ...Didn't.