Sweet child of…ours?
Two days after my discharge I was on rest, for a week. This meant a week off
work thankfully so I could just put my feet up and enjoy my babys hiccups without
all the running around.
Although with in those two days Justin had stopped by on both occasions.
Not that I wasn’t happy to see him, but with him was his girlfriend – Carmen.
I hate to admit it but she was nice, in that fake smiling through her teeth kind of
way.
Either way I wasn’t really that bothered about her, I was more bothered by him.
That awkward thing he did when we both talked Carmen and I that is.
He’d go all red and start scratching his head. Like he didn’t like that we were
talking. But then again he brought her along so what did he want? I was a lot of
thing, but I wasn’t rude.
She seemed nice, she asked about me, my job…and of course topic of the century
THE BABY.
I could tell she wasn’t comfortable…couldn’t say I blamed her.
I mean she was his new love, I was the old.
HOLY AWKWARD.
Regardless of her feeling towards me, the only thing I was concerned about was
my…our baby.
And when doctor Bloomberg asked me to attend another scan the day after I
asked Justin to come along – only if he wanted.
He almost jumped at the chance. He was smiling and twinklely all the way out the
door.
As I pulled up at the hospital and made my way into the maternity wing, there he
was sitting in the waiting area. Sunglasses and cap – his standard uniform for outings.
“Hey…you’re here. I was beginning to think I missed it!” he greeted me with a hug.
“Oh no, it was traffic. You’re not late I am! It’s just through here…” I added walking ahead of him rounding the corner of the crimson and azure coloured walls.
We went in and met with Dana my doctor. She looked a little baffled as to why he
was with me but she didn’t ask questions.
I laid down, and she did her thing allowing the image to come on the screen then
the beating started, and he was almost hypnotised.
It was too cute.
“So that's it, that's the baby…” he looked up at me and then squinted down at the
screen.
“Yes it is, that's it…um J do you want to know…the sex of the baby?” I asked him snapping him from his daze.
“They can do that?” he looked so overwhelmed “wow…yeah I mean yeah…id love
too? Is that okay doctor”
She agreed it was, if it was okay with me…it was. I wanted to know then I didn’t,
then I did…I settled that it would be best for when I moved into my new place, that
id know what colour to paint the second room.
“It’s fine…”
She moved the screen so we could both see it, and then she started to move the
little leaver on my belly “okay…well see here…” she pointed “this is where the sex
is, or isn’t…” she smiled “and I see here we have a little girl…congratulations.” She
smiled again, an affectionate happy smile.
That was contagious to both of us. I didn’t say anything I was too busy trying not
to picture the cute little outfits I saw in Fred Segal the day before.
“Wow…really it’s…a daughter?” Justin asked again, this time I could have sworn he
was a little teary eyed.
When we left the doctors, the walk to our respective vehicles he couldn’t stop
gushing.
“I mean think about how cute she's gonna be!! Your genes and these” he rolled his
eyes in a cocky manner “she's gonna be amazing!”
“Ok shallow much?” I laughed
“No, no I mean she's gonna be healthy and all I hope for that first and foremost”
he grinned awkwardly
“Well good.”
“Listen Har…Carmen’s gone back to LA, and well ive told my mom and dad
everyone, I hope you don’t mind if I stick around for a few days? I just want to
help you get settled into your new place, I want to help basically.” He stood
awkwardly, hands in his pockets again. It was that nervous gesture thing he did.
“You don’t need too, not if you have work or plans with her…I don’t want to be a
burden, I mean I can deal. My mom’s here and my friends…”
“You don’t want me to help?” he looked insulted, damn it.
“Well I mean if you want to…but only if you want.” I know I sounded like an idiot.
Well it was hard time for me, I was getting huge I was hormonal and I was hella
horny.
So yeah being around him was a little difficult.
He smiled finally, “yes I want to…Now if you’ll excuse me ive some shopping to
do…” he beeped open his Beemer that was weirdly enough parked only two spaces
beside mine.
“Shopping for what???”
“For our daughter silly…Any preferences?”
“On?”
He shrugged “I’o know…furniture for her room…baby stuff…”
“Baby stuff?” I laughed “what stuff you thinkin’ off here?”
“Toys…” he smirked knowing he was wrong. Causing me to roll my eyes at his
weirdness.
“For a new born, boy please tell my your joking here?” he walked over to my car
again.
“Well if you don’t want me to screw this up…come with me we can choose stuff
together, sound good?”
I was hesitant, for obvious reasons.
“I don’t know if that's such a good idea J…what if we’re papped wont Cara be
mad.” He laughed knowing I was dissin her.
“Its Carmen and no I don’t think she will be she's pretty mad all around so I don’t
think this will constitute another row…So will you come?”
He did that pouting puppy eyes thing that he knew made me melt…
“Please, it'll be fun and I don’t want to buy her something stupid.”
So yes I caved in, and I agreed to meet him at my appartment. Where I dropped
off my car and we took his, we had fun I had to admit.
“Hey Har, what you think of this?” he held up a little pink and yellow bear that may
have been cute but I didn’t think so…It looked evil.
“Na…”
“I think its sweet…” he lifted it to my face and put on a silly voice – almost babyish
“Harri, take me home…Im homeless and I am sooo cute…peese?” I had to laugh;
he was a grown ass man with the sense of humour of a six year old.
I missed that.
“Fine, you can take creepy teddy…but stick at the bottom of the basket…its
freaking me out.”
“Woman you have a fear of all inanimate objects Don’t’ya?” he laughed at me as
we circled the furniture section.
“NO…well only something’s….don’t go using all my info against me now J or ill bring
up the frog thing…”
“Hey now, frogs ARE creepy lil motherfuckers…china doll now, that's a different
matter.”
“What???” I defended “it’s the eyes man, it’s like they follow you all over the damn
place! UGH…NO.” I shuddered as we approached the crib section.
“Help me out here…” I insisted.
We shopped for necessities, and a few non- necessities. It was all helpful, and
grown up.
Crib, rocker cot, rocking chair, toys….all the good stuff.
It wasn’t so much fun when the pap’s showed up and started yelling at us and
wanting to know about my ever escalating belly. We ignored, and we walked but
they got their pictures…the Justin pulled a fast one, he stole their cameras, took
the film and handed em back…
Ooh boy.
“Assholes, I don’t know…” he exclaimed as soon as his ass hit the seat of the
car “In a city of millions HOW do they just show up like that…I fucking hate this.”
“I know…”
I did know, I knew for almost three years what it was like for him…and me, one of
the reasons I just had to end our relationship.
It was slowly killing me.
“I mean they just intrude like its nothing, like their yellin’ and hollerin’ isn’t shit! I
really wish they’d have laws again this shit…” he started the engine as the two
yelling photographers continued to make not so nice gestures at us in the car.
Bastards.
“Its okay, they don’t have any pictures now…but we’re going to have to be careful
J. I don’t want to be in the spotlight again, I don’t want the baby to be in the
spotlight.”
“You know that's easier said that done right? They are on my tail 24/7…how are we
gonna do that?”
I wish I knew I really did…It would have made things so much easier.
***
When we got to her appartment, her moms I should say it was empty…thankfully.
I just wasn’t up for dealing with her mom. I liked the woman and I knew that deep
down she knew I wasn’t the devil…or at least I hoped.
Regardless of what she thought of me, she was a social worker she wanted to right
by kids and I was guessing her grand kid wasn’t gonna be any different.
At the hospital she's seemed civil and she talked to me about Harri and then the
baby. She was mild with the news, that I was gonna be a daddy. I was thankful for
that ‘cause I think had she been forceful, I may have just died right there in the
damn restaurant.
“So where should I put all this stuff for now?” I asked hauling in the bags of baby
goodies.
“Oh just put em in my room for now, ill figure out what to do with them later.” She
sat her ass down, and flicked on the television.
Walking into her room, a million and one memories came flooding back at me.
That room was the stage for so much of our relationship. The first time we made
out…the first time we had sex…our first row, and of course our first make up. The
first time I realised that I loved her, but was too scared to tell her…all of it in that
lilac room.
“J”
Whoa, busted. She was standing behind me as I stood and looked around her
bedroom; god only knows what she thought I was doin’.
“What are you doing?” I faced her and looked sheepish – even though I tried not
too.
“Just…remembering stuff.” I admitted looking down at her floor.
“Oh…okay…” she stammered. “Well um…thanks for today, it was actually fun.”
“You thought it WOULDN’T?” I joked making her giggled – I loved her giggle, I
found it insanely sexy.
“No I honestly didn’t. I still feel awkward around you man…this whole thing, its
gonna take some getting used to you know?”
She was right, in a way. In should have been awkward…but it wasn’t for me, in all
honesty it felt so natural.
Her and me together again…it felt right.
“Justin when do you have to go back to LA?”
“Why?”
“Um no I was wondering – your girl…a’int she worried about you?”
“Na, we’re cool” I lied “ she's pretty understanding…and um I don’t gotta be back
till Sunday so when ever you need me to help you move all this stuff to your new
place, just let me know…”
She visibly thought it over. “You’re sure? Tribecca isn’t too far outta here…I get the
keys tomorrow, so…if you wanna go with me, or not…or meet me there
something?”
“Well Har, I need to be with you here, if im gonna help you move the shit?” I
laughed at her dumbness. She was nervous she always messed up when she got
nervous.
“Oh, duh…Okay meet me here then, say one?”
“One got it…ill see you sweetheart.” As I said it I did something I hadn’t planned
on, I kissed her on the cheek.
And just as I did, I got the whiff of her shampoo. It was the one she always used…
and I loved it.
It threw me...
“Uhh…yeah.” I mumbled “see ya…” almost sprinted out the door not really sure
what just came over me…but it was too nice to stick it out. I didn’t just want to kiss
her cheek; I wanted to KISS her – properly.
This wasn’t a good thing, not at all. I was meant to be in love with someone else….
Wasn’t I?
Author's Chapter Notes:
Hiya! I really should be adding Manips to this just to give you all a better visual for things.
That will be coming up soon if you want it!
Thanks for reading!
Story Tags: Be the first to add a tag to this story
