“So you and Justin know each other?”

I pulled my eyes away from the two lipsticks I was mixing to Miriam’s face. “Hmm?”

“You two came together.”

I hadn’t thought it had been that obvious. “We’re friends.”

“That must be an adventure.”

She had no idea how true her words were. “It can be. Hold still for a sec.” I leaned forward and put the lipstick on her and then straightened. “Okay, you’re done.”

“Great. Thanks, Emily.”

I sat down in the chair she had vacated and propped my feet up on the makeup counter. Taking a sip of my coffee, I surveyed the room. You can always tell how big a star is by how much of a production the photoshoot is. For some D lister, you might get a fold out table with some chips or something on it and one half hearted person trying to please everyone. But then you get some big star and everything changes. The set up for Justin’s shoot is ridiculous. Some catering company is here and there’s this massive table of every type of food possible and a separate table just for drinks. The photographer has like four assistants who seem to be running around like chickens with their heads cut off. Not to mention how the three Avidity models are all flipping out because they’re doing a photoshoot with Justin Timberlake.

It’s funny because any of us who actually know Justin know exactly how over the top this all is. Like Trace. He’s currently sitting in the corner and shooting spit balls in my direction Luckily he’s far enough away so that they aren’t reaching me but I swear if one hits me I’m going to pound him into the ground. But he knows what a waste this whole production is. Justin’s most likely not going to touch the food and all these people running around trying to make sure everything’s perfect are just annoying. If people knew how low key he really is than maybe everyone could just chill out.

A spit ball landed dangerously close to me and I glanced in Trace’s direction to see him smirking at me. Little turd. I flipped him off and he pretended to look shocked before beginning to load up his straw again.

“Emily, can you redo my lipstick? I had some water and it smudged.”

I focused my attention off Trace and to Serenity. Yes, Serenity. Justin finding out she would be one of his models today completely made my morning. He had looked like he was going to his own funeral.

“Yeah.” I stood up. “Sit down.”

She gave me a perfect pout to put the lipstick on and I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. She probably sits at home and practices it.

“There. Try not to drink anything else, okay?”

“Sure. Thanks.”

I sat back down again as she pranced off to join Miriam and Natalia. They were all driving me a bit crazy today with how star struck they were being. Serenity usually gets on my nerves so this is nothing new but I normally get along with the other two. But today…if I have to hear them giggle one more time, I think I might lose it.

All the girls’ eyes suddenly move to the door and I look over as well to see Justin coming back into the room in the clothes for the shoot. I smile. He looks amazing in the three piece suit he has on. Kudos to the wardrobe stylist.

He smiles over at me but doesn’t come over and instead heads in Trace’s direction. Which is a good thing because I’ve found that the models at Avidity all have huge mouths and since their eyes are glued on him, they’d catch anything that would go on between us and start saying stuff.

I realized I was staring at Justin and forced myself to look elsewhere. I could look at him all I want later.

I decided to paint my nails while I waited and I had just finished a first coat when the photographer started the shoot. I leaned back in my chair and blew on my nails slightly as I watched it. It only took a few different poses before I started to get annoyed.

I guess I should have been expecting the models to be all over Justin but nothing really prepares you for seeing Natalia with her hands all over him and Miriam looking like she was kissing his neck.

It’s dumb to feel upset because deep down I know that Justin is the very last person who would ever be unfaithful in any type of way but I can’t help feeling a bit insecure. These girls are so pretty and I feel like crap compared to them. Especially today. Nothing I put on this morning looked good so I’m just in a pair of old jeans and a faded t shirt. My hair’s all frizzy because of how humid it is outside so I’m wearing a hat to try and cover it but I know it still looks stupid.

And then there’s these dumb models who pretty much look perfect no matter what with their perfect bodies and perfect hair and perfect skin. And I’m sitting here comparing every part of myself to them and it’s making me feel like complete shit.

Dating a guy who half the female population would drop their pants for isn’t the most reassuring them in the world and I’m wishing at this point I wasn’t here. Why does he even need girls in his photoshoot? What purpose does it serve?

It took actual effort to pull my eyes away from the shoot and I tried to distract myself by putting on more nail polish. But my eyes continued to be drawn back up and my mood progressively worsened.

It was a great moment when the photographer decided to take a break. Not wanting to deal with anyone, I got up and went to the table of food. I knew none of the models would be caught dead there so I’d be safe.

I was busy glaring at a plate of sandwiches when Justin stepped behind me. He didn’t touch me but I could feel him standing directly behind me, just a breath away.

“Jealousy doesn’t look good on you,” he whispered in my ear.

I clenched my teeth and stared harder at the sandwiches. “I’m not jealous,” I mumbled, refusing to turn around.

“If looks could kill you’d have three dead models on your hands.”

I didn’t say anything and squeezed my eyes shut. I was at the point where I was so frustrated that I wanted to either scream or cry and right now tears were prickling my eyes.

“It’s just pictures, Emily.”

“I know that,” I said, surprised at how steady I was able to make my voice. “And I’m not jealous.”

“Whatever, Em.”

I felt him leave and I opened my eyes. I didn’t move until I heard the photographer call everyone over again. I glanced over my shoulder to see Miriam positioning herself in Justin’s lap and that kind of did it for me. The next time I blinked, I felt a tear fall and I knew I had to get out of there. There was a sign pointing to the bathrooms and I quickly walked over to the doorway, keeping my head down.

It was a private bathroom that I found and I locked myself in. I grabbed some toilet paper and caught my tears before they fell down my cheeks. I didn’t want to look like I had been crying and I took a few deep breaths, trying to calm myself down. I hugged my arms around myself and paced the small room just to keep myself occupied.

My head jerked up when there was a knock on the closed door. I stared at it but didn’t say anything. Whoever it is can wait.

Another knock and then, “Emily?”

A shaky sigh exited my mouth. “What?”

“Justin wanted me to come see if you’re okay.”

“I’m fine.”

“Can we not talk through the door?”

I hesitated but finally reached over and unlocked the door but didn’t bother actually opening. A second passed and then the door opened a crack and Trace poked his head in. His eyes landed on me and then he came fully into the bathroom and shut the door behind him.

“So you’re not fine.”

I crossed my arms over my chest again and stared at the soap dispenser. I don’t want to cry again and I think if I have to verbalize what I’m thinking, the tears are going to reappear.

“It’s about the models, right?” he asked and sat down on the closed toilet lid. I looked to the side and stayed silent. “It’s just for the media, Em. It doesn’t mean anything.”

“I know that,” I whispered, finding it easier to keep my voice steady doing that than if I spoke at a normal level. “I know that and I know I’m being stupid but I can’t help it.”

“You’re not being stupid. You’re being human. Anyone would react the same way if they saw people throwing themselves all over their boyfriend or girlfriend or whatever.”

I brushed away a couple tears that escaped and began to pace again. “I knew the photoshoot would be like this though.”

He shrugged. “Knowing is different than seeing.” He tore off some toilet paper and handed it to me. “It sucks to see it, especially for the first time. You can’t help it.”

I nodded slightly and ran the toilet paper under my eyes. I looked in the mirror and a small laugh escaped me, along with a couple more tears. I looked like shit. “As if I couldn’t look any worse,” I mumbled, wiping away some smeared mascara.

“You look fine.”

“I look like shit.”

He got up and came over to me. He pulled the brim of my hat lower over my eyes. “There. No one can tell you’ve been crying.”

I gave him a small smile. I have never appreciated Trace more than this moment. “Thanks.”

“Don’t worry about it.”

“How much longer do you think the photoshoot will be?” I asked, throwing the balled up toilet paper in the trash.

“At least another hour.”

I sighed and ran my hands down my arms. “I wish I didn’t have to sit there and watch it.”

“You just need to distract yourself. I have a deck of cards if you want to play something.”

I smiled a bit. He was seriously a godsend. “Okay.”

We left the bathroom together and went back to the photoshoot. Following Trace’s idea, I kept my hat down low on my head and didn’t look in the direction of Justin and the models, afraid I’d get upset again if I saw them.

For the next hour and a half, Trace and I played cards and I managed to push all thoughts of Justin and the models from my mind, which improved my mood slightly.

I was so glad that Trace was there when we left the photoshoot. If Justin’s going to pick a fight or anything, he won’t do it in front of anyone, even Trace. And I knew he wasn’t his normal self because he wasn’t saying anything to either one of us for the entire drive. In fact, none of us did until I saw that he had missed the turn to my apartment and we were now headed in the direction of his house.

“You missed my turn,” I said from the backset. I got no response and some annoyance went through me. I tried again. “Hello? You missed my turn.”

Trace glanced over at Justin and then back at me when there was again no response. I opened my mouth to repeat it again but before I could say anything, Justin’s voice cut me off.

“Just leave it, Emily.”

Rolling my eyes, I turned my body to face the window and crossed my arms over my chest. He obviously wants to go and have some kind of talk when Trace isn’t there and that’s the last thing I want. I don’t want to talk about the photoshoot. I just want to forget about it.

“It you’ve got something you need to say you can just-”

He cut me off again. “Leave it, Emily.”

I let out a large breath of air to let him know what I thought about that and rolled my eyes again. Why does he always have to be so damn stubborn? I don’t want to talk about the photoshoot.

Nothing else was said for the ten minutes it took to get to his house. When we arrived, Trace got out quickly, obviously not wanting to be involved in all.

“We need to talk,” Justin stated when Trace was out of earshot and then got out of the car before I could respond. I slowly got out as well and trailed behind him.

I really didn’t want to talk about today. I want to just ignore it and pretend it didn’t happen. And maybe that’s not the most mature thing of me but, hey, I never claimed to be the most mature person in the world.

We ended up in his bedroom and he shut the door behind us. I swear I felt like a little kid sitting in the principal’s office.

“So is there a reason why you don’t want to talk to me?” he asked once we were in his room alone.

“No,” I mumbled.

“Then what was that shit in the car?”

I sighed and sat down on the edge of the bed, not saying anything.

“We need to talk about what happened at the shoot,” he said when I never responded to his question.

I sighed. “What about it?” I asked, well aware of what his answer would be.

“About how jealous and insecure you were.”

I closed my eyes briefly and then looked down to the side. The childish part of me wanted to deny it but I forced myself to be somewhat mature in my answer. “I’m over it.”

“It never should have been an issue in the first place. What’s going on with you?”

I crossed my arms over my chest. “Nothing.”

An exasperated breath left him. “Would you stop being so defensive?”

“I’m not.”

“You’re sitting there with your arms crossed and hardly even speaking to me. You’re being defensive. I just want to talk.” He pinched the bridge of his nose and squeezed his eyes shut and I began to feel the tiniest bit bad that I had made him so frustrated. “You clearly knew there were going to be girls in the shoot so I don’t get why suddenly you’re upset.”

I drew in a deep breath. “I’m not upset. I’m just…I don’t know.”

“Well what’s going on?”

I forced my words out. “I knew there were going to be girls and I knew it was going to be like that but knowing all that is different than actually sitting there and watching it happen.”

“It’s just pictures. It doesn’t mean anything.”

“I know that. I know it means nothing but that doesn’t mean I want to sit there and watch it. Can you just try to understand that?”

“I fully understand that, Emily, because I’ve been in relationships where I’ve had to sit there and watch it just like you did today. I’m well aware of how much it sucks.”

“Then why are you so mad?”

“I’m not mad that you got upset about the photoshoot. I’m upset because when I asked you about it you acted so childish and wouldn’t even admit to it. It’s not like I’m going to get mad at you for what you feel.”

“You might.”

“Well I won’t.” He turned away from me and went to the doors leading onto the balcony. I stared at his back as he stood there. It was quiet for a while and I had just begun to think he was going to let it all go when he spoke.

“This is really stupid.”

“Well what do you want me to say, Justin?” I demanded. He can’t just start this argument and then decide it’s stupid and that he wants no part in it. “I’m not just going to apologize for how I feel.”

He turned back around. “I’m not asking you to. But don’t shut me out when I ask you what you’re feeling. At least I care enough to ask.”

I let out a quiet sigh and rubbed my eyes. I was too tired to argue with him anymore. “I know.” I went over to him and hugged my arms around his midsection. “I’m glad you care and I should have just said how I felt.”

His arms went around me and he rested his chin on the top of my head. It was quiet for a minute. “You don’t have to be jealous of those girls.”

He can never let things go completely. “They’re models, Justin. Forgive me for being a little insecure around them. Especially today.”

“What’s today?”

“I’m having an ugly day,” I mumbled into his t shirt.

His chest began to shake as he laughed. “An ugly day?”

I roll my eyes. “Yes.”

“And why exactly are you having an ugly day?”

“None of my clothes fit right and my hair’s a mess.”

“I think you look cute today.”

I scoffed and looked up at him. “Yeah right.”

“Really.” He tapped the edge of my hat. “With you little hat and torn up jeans.”

He must be lying just to make me feel better because I know for a fact that my outfit is not cute. But I can’t help but take the bait. “Really?”

“Need me to show you how cute I think you are?”

A small giggle escaped me at his playful eyes. “Okay.”

After all, the best part of fighting is making up, right?