Softly she breathed in and out, in and out, in and out her deep brown eyes following the blades of the ceiling fan as it spun.

Finally accepting the fact that she would spend another anniversary alone she idlely kicked off her red high heels and rubbed her eyes to force away the tears that were threatening to fall.

"Dammit!" She cursed to an empty room, "Dammit! Dammit! Dammit!"

Monica sat up and turned on the light by her bed, and then her eyes diverted to the phone and suddenly her night looked brighter. She picked up the phone and with a heavy heart dialed a number that she was finding herself calling all to often these recent weeks.

After a moment a voice answered, and five minutes later she hung up the phone with a guilty sigh. Then she slipped her feet back into the heels and walked over to her dresser to light a couple votive candles to replace the two that had gone out as she waited alone earlier.

About a half hour later, the scent of roses filled the air as the pink candles burned down and breaking through the sound of sweet jazz music a doorbell rang.

Monica pulled on a black silk robe and left her master suite, she tiptoed down the staircase and finally arrived at the door. Cautiously she peeked out the window next to the door to make sure it was who she expected on the other side and then sighed again, plastered a fake alluring smile on her face and opened the door, grinning at person who held out a purple lily and then wrapped his arms around her in a comforting and lingering hug. The two stepped into the room and he shut the door, then leaned back against it and pulled her up to him so that he could kiss her pationatly.

"Why hello Mr. Fatone." Monica smiled against his lips, "It's good to see you too."

"Is Jace working late again?" He whispered as he kissed a trail down her neck and parted the robe so that he could form a new trail towards the skin that was hinding under the red lace.

Monica nodded, and reached for his face so that she could kiss his lips. Then she shrugged off the robe and wrapped her arms around his neck, and her legs around his waist as he lifted her into his arms and carried her up the staircase and back into the candle lit room.

It was an all to familiar pattern they followed as he undressed her and held her in the way that only her husband should, but her husband wasn't there, and he was.

Her lover was left alone to watch the continuously spinning fan blades above his head. He sighed and got out of the bed pulling on his boxers and shirt and waiting for her to return with the bad news he was used to.

Seconds later she did. "That was Josh. He's leaving the studio now, you should probably go." She whispered, walking over to him as he sat on the side of her bed and she dug her fingers into his hair and looked at him sadly.

"You know we don't have to keep doing this. He's never around, even when he says he will be, and I am always here for you."

"Joey, I can't. I love him." Monica answered softly.

"So this is what you do, you fool around with one of his friends because you can."

"You are just as guilty so don't say that to me." She turned around and walked away from him. He stood up quickly and followed her, spinning her around and hugging her as tightly as he could.

"I'm sorry Mon, but you know I love you. I love you so much more then he does can't you see that? I would never choose the music over you, I could never leave you alone on our anniversary, I would be there for you always. Why can't we just be together?"

Monica pushed against his chest until he let go of her and she stepped away from him. "I can't Joe, I just can't."

Joey sighed and then grabbed the rest of his clothes and put them on. He gave her one last look before he kissed her goodbye and left.

He walked into the room with a large bouquet of roses and a bottle of red wine. He set the wine on the dresser along with the flowers and crossed the room quickly. He kneeled on the bed and leaned over her, and kissing her.

"Happy anniversary." She replied and inhaled the scent of the flowers. "Did you get everything done?"

"Yeah, Justin was there working on a song with me and we were really getting a lot of the hard stuff done. Thanks so much for being so understanding, I don't have any idea how I got so lucky to find a girl like you. But tomorrow, I'll make it up to you, I made a reservation at that restarant you really like, and I'm yours for the whole evening, no inturruptions okay?"

A new wave of guilt rushed over her as she nodded and tried her best to smile at him. She watched as he left the room and then returned with a pair of wine glasses. He set them on the nightstand and popped open the cork of the bottle before pouring the red liquid into the glasses. Then he stripped off his shirt and jeans and climbed into the bed next to her.

He handed her one of the glasses. "To us." he smiled and raised his glass, "To us and to another wonderful five years as husband and wife."

Monica raised her glass up to meet with his and they clinked together and she immediatly downed her entire glass and then reached over him to set the empty glass on the nightstand.

Josh chuckled, "Thirsty much?" he said and his eyes focused on her as she loomed above him and took the glass away from him and put it next to hers.

She ran her finger up an invisible path on his bare chest until it traveled up his neck and chin and finally rested on him lips. "Shhhh"

His pupils dialated as he watched her climb on top of him and pull off her shirt as unbeknownst to him she tried to forget her earlier escapade and drown herself in him. Her hands rested on his chest and she leaned down her mouth hovering just above his.

"I love you." she said softly.

"I love you too." he whispered in return and she finally brought her lips to his.