Fourteen interviews all of which are fifthteen minutes long, two photo shoots both of which also have an interview with them. TV spots with three morning shows, a movie premier that I’m in all of ten minutes, not too mention the eight auditions I have for new roles that have just so happened to have come my way.
I sit at the table in my hotel room and stare at the piece of paper in front of me and there it is, my day, all mapped out to the point that I’m left wondering when I’m meant to eat, yes I may be in the acting business but I eat, shock horror I know, but also left to wonder what would happened if I needed a toilet break anywhere in my day.
“So how is our fresh new face of 2009 feeling today?”
Glancing up from the paper that’s words have starting to all blend into one I see my assistant standing before me.
“Chloe number one it’s only the beginning of 2008 why are you talking about 2009 and my so called fresh face? And number two how did you get in here? I swear I locked the door”
“Because Bel my dear girl, you are going to be the next big thing, all of us from your team can feel it and I have a key so a locked door isn’t going to stop me”
“Since when did you and my darling agent Steven make yourselves into my team?” I asked with a short giggle.
“We voted and you lost get over it”
“I just, I don’t really get it, I mean have you seen this?” I asked while sliding the paper across the table to her where she had joined me “my whole day is packed down to practically the minute and the majority of it is interviews, seriously I can count at least six or seven hours of interviews alone. Why on this green earth would I have to do so many interviews in one day?”
“Believe it or not your creating quite a buzz with the indie film you did last summer and people want to know who you are, this is why you got into this business no?”
“I know I know Stevens already tried to drill this into my head and I’m not trying to complain I’m not, it’s just… I know I should be grateful and soaking in all of this while I can but I mean… no one really knows who I am right? So it just makes me wonder why so much in so little time. It’s not like anyone is knocking down the door to find out the goods on me”
Chloe sighed at me she actually bloody sighed at me, I know I’m asking a lot of questions but I seriously don’t get it. I’ve wanted to act for a while now and I’ve been trying for a good six or so years.
I was you predictable straight out of school girl from a small town who headed straight to the big city with nothing but stars in my eyes. Those stars tend to fade in time, when rejection after rejection just keeps whacking you in the face.
I like to think that’s why now I don’t understand what all the hoopla is about. I mean I have only starred in one indie film so far and one mainstream movie that I was in for the whole on ten minutes. I don’t even really know who me is anymore.
“Belinda seriously how many times do we have to have this conversation?” Chloe said while looking up from her knees at me. “You did a great job at something and finally are getting recognized for the work you’ve been trying to do for years. Why does it feel like you’re so against this when you’re just getting a leg in the door? That’s not the girl I met six years ago”
That right there makes me groan. She always brings it back to that. So what if six years ago I waltz into her work place and demanded to see an agent who could represent me because I was going to be the best actress since Audrey Hepburn. So what if I had an attitude of thinking that nothing could break me down, and no one would turn me away.
“Let’s just drop it ok just pretend like I never said anything”
I get up and start walking towards my hotel bathroom wanting to just get away from the depressed vibe that has shone itself onto me and all that is around me.
“Bel come on we should talk about…”
“Chloe please It’s just… just like you said it’s been six years I’m not sure I’m that girl anymore, I’m not even sure I even know who that girl was back then and I don’t know who I want to be or even am at this moment. I’m just going to go shower and get ready for the day”
I knew I should of just crawled back into bed when I saw that piece of paper this morning, I knew something else had to go wrong today, the vibe that was just put on me for the rest of today being problem number two.
Turning on the shower and looking to right at myself in the mirror I tried to read the face of the person in the mirror. I wanted to know who that was, I mean I know it’s me I’m not that crazy I just want to understand that person. I want to be able to look in the mirror and be happy with myself, happy because I know who I am and understand everything I am and everything I want to believe in, myself being included.
“Is it too much to ask to just be able to understand?”
“After the break on the Today show we have over night sensation Belinda Carpenter with us, she’ll be sitting down with Meredith to tell us about her sudden rise to fame.”
“Dude what are you doing awake so early when it’s the one day this week you get to sleep in?”
I turn around to see Trace walking into the living room of my hotel suite wiping the sleep from his eyes.
“Sorry if I woke you I just couldn’t sleep. I’ve been wide awake since about four” Yes believe it or not I Justin Timberlake have times when I can’t sleep and I have nothing better to do than watch infomercials and get tempted to buy a George Forman grill. Is it a bad thing if you have more than two? I mean I do like my grilling.
“Shit Justin we only got back here at two. You’ve been awake this whole time?”
“Yeah I just can’t get comfy and I keep tossing and turning so I just decided to come out here”
“Well I hope you didn’t toss and turn out here and left that and your hand in the bedroom bro” Trace tried to joke with a smirk as he dropped down on the couch next to me.
“Oh ha-ha we are just full of jokes this morning aren’t we munchkin man” I replied while giving him a shove to move his ass away from me.
“I do try. You know you wish you had my skills. Hey are you going to be ok for the auditions for that movie thing you have today?” he asked while turning his attention to the TV also
“Yeah I’ll be fine I mean it’s not until like four anyway, I just have to go and read with some chicks that are going for the female lead in the film”
“But I thought you were the female lead”
I didn’t even bother answering back to his comment, just sent him a look and turned back to the TV to see a girl being interview by Meredith… come to think of it why do these morning news shows always have older women on them? I totally think if they had some hotter chicks on it us younger males would start watching the news more.
“So you got some rave reviews for that indie movie you starred in that was just released how was it making that film?”
I’m onto my second morning show and fifth interview. Yeah it may only be seven o’clock in the morning but this little lass has been working since about four o’clock this morning. Why did I want to do this again?
“Well it was the second film I’d ever been in and I was only in the first one for a short amount of time, so this movie was completely different. The set was much more laid back than they big budget movie, but that’s probably because we didn’t have as much money to throw around and get all our panties in a bunch” I say with a short laugh
Meredith just looks at me, I just tried to joke lady give me a break, crack a smile or even a blink I’ll take a blink of the eyes right now over the blank stare she is sending my way
“Hmm yes, so you have also been such an overnight success that must be so relieving it’s a little rare things working that way nowadays, and two movies made back to back and released in one bang”
Seriously did this older lady even do any investigating on me at all? I mean come on overnight success? And the movies were made at least two years apart.
“Well I wouldn’t call six years an overnight success at all Meredith. I busted my ass to get here, to get at the least a toe in the door. I got the big movie on a whim and then two years later got the part in the indie film, because I banged on some doors and rattled a few cages just trying to get auditions. No definitely wouldn’t call that an overnight success”
Ok was it just me or did that come out maybe the tiniest but bitchy? Well I think I just found my problem number three of the day, go me it just had to have happened on national TV.
Shit I can see Steven and Chloe standing just off to the side with wide eyes shocked at my catty comment, what am I meant to do not say anything just so I don’t rub her the wrong way. I don’t think so bucko.
I really think they should just have a really hot younger guy hosting this show, lord knows that if there was I’d get up in the morning and watch the news with a little more interest and it would give me something to wake up to that’s for sure.
“Damn that girls has a bit of a bite doesn’t she”
Laughing along with Trace I couldn’t help but feel a little sorry for the girl on TV. That Meredith lady sure can be a little standoffish when she’s interviewing you.
“Yeah I bet you twenty bucks she gets a talking to from her agent, but man was it funny”
“Well if she is as new as they say she is it’s definitely going to give her some more face time”
I nodded my head in agreement to Trace’s comment while I stretch my arms out.
“It definitely won’t hurt her that’s for sure, plus she’s hot so that’ll help”
“Yeah hey just think if she auditions for your moving then maybe she can help you with that whole lonesome tossing and turning you’ve been doing by yourself” Trace laughed while throwing in a snort for good measure.
“Funny Trace funny”
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