It’s never good to wake up completely hung over with no recollection of the night before whatsoever. Especially when you open your eyes and realize you’re in a hotel room that is not your own. And even worse, you look over to see a half naked man sleeping next to you. That’s what I woke up to seconds ago, and I already feel sick to my stomach. I checked under the covers to see that I am completely clothed so that makes me feel better. I am a little nervous to pull the covers down from the man next to me to see if he is completely naked or just his top half is. OK, phew, he has his pants on.
Now that mystery man has his pants on, I think I can remove the pillow that is covering his head. I grabbed onto his hair and pulled his head up so I could see who it is. Justin. That’s quite the relief.
“God Dallas,” he woke up before putting the pillow back over his head.
“It’s not weird at all that you’re waking up next to me?”
He laughed, “I don’t know about you, but I’m in my room.”
I took a deep breath and put another pillow over my head. I decided it’s not worth the stress, obviously nothing happened. I need to focus on getting rid of the hangover.
“How are you feeling Dallas?”
“Like death.”
He laughed again and pulled the pillow off my head, “Get up, let’s go for a run.”
“Are you serious?” he can’t be serious. I know he’s like a robot with sleep but he had to be drinking as much as I was.
“Yeah, it helps cure the hangover. I got the magic potion.”
“And what’s that?”
He stood up and went to the fridge throwing a bottle of Gatorade at me, “Gatorade, aspirin and Dramamine.”
“Really?”
“Really. And a lot of bacon and eggs,” Justin smiled as he picked up the phone and ordered room service.
I swallowed the pills and drank the Gatorade quickly, “Can you get cheese on my eggs? Scrambled?”
“Make that scrambled eggs,” he spoke into the phone, “With cheese. Yeah… uh…”
“American.”
“American. Coffee and tea. Thanks,” he hung up the phone and jumped back in bed, pulling the covers up, “I’m tired Dallas.”
“And hung-over, are you hung-over?”
“Not as bad as you,” he laughed.
“That’s not funny. Why’d you let me drink so much?”
“There was no stopping you. You don’t mix well with the Patron do you?”
“No, me and tequila don’t go well. It makes me really…” shit. Tequila makes me horny and I fall all over guys.
“Lovable?” Justin asked with a laugh, “hot? Passionate? Randy?”
Oh gosh. I pulled the pillow back over my head while Justin laughed hysterically. It’s not funny, not even a little funny. I usually stay clear of tequila but I must have started off with something and then switched to it. I only get like that when I do shots though, I can have as many margaritas as I want and feel fine. Well, not fine but not like I’m going to jump the next male that walks by me.
I took a deep breath and pulled the pillow away from my head, “Did I…?”
“You did. Well… go ahead, finish.”
“Did I try…?”
“Yeah, you tried,” he laughed, “I shut you down though don’t worry.”
I took a deep breath, that’s so embarrassing; I’m such an idiot. “I’m sorry, I just…”
“It’s cool. We’ll just keep you away from the tequila next time huh?” he answered with a smile.
I pulled the sweatshirt that was on the ground over my head and left the hood cover my face as much as it could. Justin continued laughing. I don’t think it’s that funny.
“It’s not funny.”
“It was funny actually, hysterical.” Now he’s probably never going to let me live it down.
“Can we talk about something else?”
“Yeah sure, like how you want me?” he’s got that smug smile on his face that makes me want to kill him.
I rolled my eyes, “Only when I’m drunk, not in real life. And only tequila, but don’t feel special, I want everyone when I’ve had tequila.”
“You know, a lot of girls want me.”
I laughed as I grabbed onto the pillow, “I know, and I’m happy for you. But they don’t really know you do they?”
“Yeah, they know more about me than you would think,” he grabbed the pillow from my arms and hit me with it. “Want to go shoot some hoops after breakfast?”
“Can we wait and see if I’m cured?”
“You’ll be cured, give it a minute.”
Last night was quite the night. Dallas was all over me; she really should stay away from tequila. It was funny though, she was getting mad that I wasn’t taking her bait. Luckily I didn’t have too much to drink. If I had a couple more shots I’m sure I would have taken advantage of the situation. That would have been awkward.
My magic potion helped straighten Dallas out. I don’t know why she was surprised. It’s just a simple cure. It always works; I’ve had my fair share of drunken nights with Patron, although none as entertaining as last night.
After breakfast we went to shoot some hoops and then it was a few hours later that I made it to the venue and found the catering area. I grabbed a plate full of food and sat down stuffing my face when Dallas sat down next to me. “How are you feeling Dallas?”
“Wonderful Justin, thank you,” she smiled as she took a bite of her food.
“Do you want to get trashed tonight?” I asked with a smile.
“No, I don’t. Thanks though,” she laughed.
“Mail call,” Matt came over with a box of mail and handed me a few cards, “Veda Dutra.”
“Thank you,” she said as she was handed a pile of cards. Why does she get more birthday cards than I do?
“Your last name is Dutra?” she nodded her head and I laughed, “Your initials are VD?”
“Wow, you’re really mature.”
“Your initials are VD,” I repeated, “That’s amazing.”
“You were in a boy band.”
“And? It paid the bills. Your initials stand for a STD.”
“You were in a beauty pageant.”
I looked at her for a second and she laughed.
“That trumps all.”
“How did you know about that?” Everyone always knows about that, I don’t know how.
She shrugged but continued laughing, “I have connections.”
“Who told you that? Did my mother tell you that?”
“It doesn’t matter. The point is you were in a beauty pageant.”
“My mother made me do it.”
“No she did not,” she laughed. OK, so I take it my mother was the one to tell her, “You wanted to do it.”
“That’s not true.”
Dallas gave me a look and laughed again, “It’s ok. I know you begged her to do it.”
I took a deep breath, shook my head, and decided to let her have her minute.
“OK, it’s not funny. It really bothers you huh?” I nodded my head; “I won’t talk about it anymore. Unless you really piss me off. Just remember whatever it is you think is funny about me, I always have the beauty pageant card.”
Great. That means from now whatever I say she’ll always be like… well you were in a beauty pageant. The end. “I’m sure there’s plenty of embarrassing things I’ll find out about you.”
“Not that bad Justin, trust me.”
I just shook my head and opened my cards. “This is from my Grandmother,” I said with a laugh, “She always sends me a birthday card with ten bucks.”
“That’s adorable,” she smiled as she opened one of her cards and started laughing hysterically.
“What?”
“It’s from my sister.” She started reading the card, “Happy birthday Veda! I miss you. I can’t believe you’re on tour with Justin Timberlake. That’s so cool. What’s he like? Is he as hot in person as he is on TV?”
“Yes,” I answered for her, “Did you tell her yes?”
“Uh no,” she laughed, “I’m not going to lie to my sister.”
“So you think I’m hotter on television?”
“No, I don’t think you’re hot ever,” she laughed and continued reading, “I want to come visit you, can I come? I promise I won’t do anything too stupid. I think I’ll be able to control myself around him. I mean, I’m sure I’ll be nervous and everything but I don’t think I’ll make a complete idiot out of myself. Anyway, happy birthday! Do you think you can send me a picture and his autograph? No one believes me. I miss you! Love, Audrey.”
“Is she hot?”
“My sister?” I nodded my head and felt Dallas slap my arm, “She’s sixteen, don’t be gross.”
I laughed, “Well that’s sweet, tell her I said thank you. And tell her I’m hotter in person. Don’t ruin my image Dallas.”
“Yeah, whatever. Can you sign something for her?”
“I will.”
“And let me take a picture quick?” she pulled out her cell phone.
“Sure,” I made a face as she took my picture.
“Perfect,” Dallas laughed, “You’re obnoxious.”
“Tell her I said hi.” I grabbed a picture from the table next to us and wrote: To Audrey, I’m way hotter in person. I signed my name and handed it to Dallas.
“Thanks,” she rolled her eyes, “You’re such a loser.” She stopped when her cell phone beeped and laughed, “The response is… AHH oh my god, oh my god, oh my god. Not really oh my god, just O-M-G.”
I laughed, “I like your sister more than you.”
“Good, maybe she can come on tour with you instead.”
“I’d like that.” I stood up and grabbed my plate, “I have to go meet and greet the children. It’s been fun.”
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I have been in this business since I was a kid. I’ve been touring and doing shows since I was 14, if not before. Never in my life have I been more pissed off while on stage. Let me set the scene. It was the end of the show and everyone was out taking a bow. Meanwhile, this bitch comes running onstage pushing everyone away and grabs onto me. That’s not the problem, I’ve been grabbed plenty of times. Crazy fans have jumped on stage plenty of times.
But this bitch pushed everyone out of the way, including Dallas who fell from the top area of the stage to the bottom. I may or may not have called this girl a bitch which I’m sure will make me the asshole on the internet in a matter of hours, if it’s not up there already. I believe my exact words were, “Get the fuck off me you crazy bitch.”
Looking back, it probably was not the best choice of words but she caught me off guard. And she pushed Dallas off the fucking stage. Everyone was rushed off the stage afterwards, I hate that one crazy bitch ruins the show for everyone. I jumped down to Dallas, “Are you alright?”
“Yeah,” she said something else but I couldn’t hear her. I helped her up and off stage.
“Are you alright?” I asked her again.
“Yeah, she fucking knocked me over.”
She’s limping. Shit, “Are you sure you’re alright?”
“I’m fine.”
“You’re limping.”
“My ankle just hurts a little, I’ll be ok.”
“You better be ok, I can’t have you fucking dying on me.”
She laughed as someone handed me ice, “Thanks for caring Justin.”
I laughed as I put her arm around my shoulder so I could help her walk to the buses, “Come on my bus? I got some new movies.”
She nodded her head and I helped her on the bus to the back. She sat down on my bed and put her leg up so I put the ice on it. We cannot have her with a busted ankle.
“I’m sorry, are you sure you’re ok?”
“Yeah, don’t be sorry. It’s not your fault you have crazy bitch ass fans,” she laughed, “It’s OK, it just hurts when I’m walking on it.”
I nodded my head, “Yeah but still, that’s fucked up.”
“It’s ok.”
“See, some girls want me, even without tequila,” I smiled.
“Don’t make assumptions, you don’t know that.”
“I do know that. I heard her say, oh he’s even hotter in person, and I haven’t even had any tequila.”
“I bet that’s what she said,” she laughed.
“It is.”
“I’m sure.”
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