Saying that Justin was somewhat confused and more than a little worried was kind of like describing him as a little famous – a severe understatement.

If he put aside his own selfish issues for a moment, he was concerned for her safety. Maybe at the core she was some everyday college girl but as far as anybody but they and the ghost of her best friend knew, she was the Renee Anderson. Going out without security was a huge risk, especially in a strange city. She could get mobbed or she could get lost or some drunk pervert could set upon her; anything could happen. It was eleven thirty at night and he was really starting to get worried. Justin hadn’t been able to reach her on her cell phone and he had absolutely no idea where she could have gone.

He’d already ascertained it was nowhere in the hotel and before he could go out to the rental car, the hotel manager had approached him and tipped him off that somebody had come in asking some out of place questions about whether they’d ever had any famous guests. (Justin had tipped him an awful lot of money in advance to inform him of any such happenings and the guy had kept his end of the bargain). So leaving the safety of his room was out of the question, which meant that getting in the car to cruise the streets looking for her was out too.

On his own behalf, he was a little confused and a little hurt. Having decided for himself that he was not going to feel guilty about last night, his own Renee had cheated on him and was never coming back anyway, Justin had actually felt pretty good about the whole thing when he’d woken up with her. This time, rather than being disturbed by it, he had relished the fact that she felt completely different to her alter ego.

The more he got to know the real her, the more he liked her. She was everything his girlfriend used to be before the fame had screwed with her head. Before he’d always looked at her as a fairly grounded person: now, with the comparison and the revelations of what she’d really been up to the past few months, he was seeing her in a different, less angelic, less ‘has it all together’ light.

The new Renee had become very appealing once he’d got his head out of his ass and stopped blaming her for all the problems she’d made him open his eyes to. Now he thought about it, he supposed she hadn’t exactly turned around and confessed any of her own feelings towards him after he’d said his piece to her but she’d turned over and snuggled up to him, that said things too.

It said things which suggested that she was going to stick around rather than mysteriously go MIA while he was asleep, and he was a little pissed with her about that.

Finally he heard the loud click of the door that meant a key card had been swiped through. In the same instance relief and annoyance washed through him. He stood stiffly with his arms folded and what he hoped was a suitably pissed expression on his face, not stopping to think that the boxers and the wife beater with his skinny legs on show kind of put a damper on the whole righteously miffed motif he was going for – pyjamas weren’t exactly power clothing.

Stepping through the door her face half hidden behind a bucket hat and clad in a fairly innocuous jeans and shirt get up was one Renee Anderson, who was herself giving off some very anxious vibes.

“I never thought I’d see the day when I slept with somebody who skipped out on me. This is wrong, I feel like a woman.”

“I woke up with you. It doesn’t count as skipping out.” Renee’s reply was unconvincing as she was pulling off the hat but still not looking at him.

“I’m not sure whether I wanna know where you were or why you left first.” Steel eyes bored into her and she felt very uncomfortable in her skin, which prickled under the heat of his stare.

“I just needed to do some thinking. You… I… we kinda threw me for a loop here. I just wanted to go clear my head. I’m sorry if you were worried.”

“You could have called,” Justin told her accusingly.

“You would have asked where I was and stuff and I just wasn't ready to come back. I’m sorry.” She seemed earnest in her apology and he relaxed a little bit. Not much, but a little was better than nothing.

“You okay? All in one piece, didn’t get attacked by rabid fans or nothin?”

“All good.” She smiled tightly.

“Okay. I’m still pissed though.”

“Got it.” Renee smirked a little as the angry expression vacated his features and he visibly relaxed. “You’re pissed.”

“You can make it up to me later.” Justin watched the blood drain from her face and didn’t like the reaction. “It was a joke Ren. You know, joke, j-o… what’s that?”

Oh the expression was back in record time. “What?” She mumbled.

“The big black thing around your neck.” Justin’s voice shook as he stuck an index finger in the direction of the offending item. He knew what it was. Somehow he just knew.

Renee cursed inwardly, her fingers immediately flying to the piece of onyx wrapped in a delicate cage of silver. She’d hidden it under her shirt but it must have popped out. Momentarily she thought of lying but he was too obviously angry to fall for such a weak falsehood. Quietly, she opened her mouth.

“We should have known it was always gonna be the last place on the list.”

“You went looking for it again?”

“Tonight’s our deadline. It was now or never.”

“I thought we decided never!” Justin yelled pacing over a couple of square feet of the carpet, unable to believe what was happening to him.

“You decided.” Renee sniffled before suddenly the floodgates burst and she physically couldn’t shut her mouth. “You decided we were gonna come find the thing in the first place and then you decided you liked me so you decided we should sleep together and then you decided that that made us… I don’t know… a couple, something, I don’t fucking know! You said it yourself, Justin, I have to make my own decision!”

“Well you better hurry the fuck up because you got fifteen minutes!” He shouted right back at her, glancing at his watch before pushing his hands over his shaved head. “I don’t believe this. I can’t believe I was feeling good about this. You felt good about this, you were next to me and…”

“No I didn’t.” She said it painfully quietly and he looked up, stunned and more than a little hurt. He didn’t recall any girl having ever told him that in his life – he was Justin Timberlake.

“What?” He blurted, utterly bewildered.

“I’m sorry, J…” She rubbed her nose, blinking back tears that threatened to spill. “I… I know we both were in the moment last night but this morning… I just had this feeling we made a mistake, and then you woke up and you were being so sweet to me and I got so confused…”

“So you cuddle up to me and lead me on?” He asked hoarsely.

“I didn’t mean to… it meant a lot, what you said.” Renee pleaded with him.

“So why the hell did you go looking for the necklace?” Justin took the steps towards her with deep confusion written on his face.

“Because something just wasn't feeling right,” she admitted. “It didn’t feel right when you started kissing me but I just couldn’t believe you’d… I felt like it was really me you were focussed on and then this morning you were telling me you liked me and I wanted to believe it so bad but it just felt wrong…”

“You thought I was lying to you?” Justin asked incredulously. He knew she’d only known him a few weeks but didn’t she know him better than that after he’d been so intimate with his feelings with her?

“You’re not lying to me, Justin.” Renee put a shaky hand to his face and stroked his cheek. “You’re lying to yourself.”

“What?” Boy he was saying that a lot. He didn’t like it; it was a bad, bad word.

“This was never about me.” Her face screwed up in an effort to keep the sobs in. She didn’t want to do this, but she knew she had to. “This was her. It’s always about her for you.”

“NO!” He yelled, pushing her back. “I’m done with her!”

“No you’re not.” Okay, here came the waterworks, why fight them? She pushed her still trembling hand to her nose, rubbing it. “You were only with me to start with because you were deluding yourself I was her even when you had doubts about me. You got angry with me because I made you face up to things about her. Now you’re with me because you think I’m some past version of her that you can fix your mistakes with.”

“That’s not true! I like you because…”

“I remind you of how she used to be.” Renee sniffled. The words stopped Justin in his tracks and she knew he knew it too. “You’re not feeling something new and different for me, you’re just trying to go back to when you knew things were fine with her. You can’t do that Justin!” Words only came between gasps of breath and sniffles and sobs but she was getting them out slowly. “She’s changed but you’ve changed too. You can’t go back, it has to be forward.”

“And what do you know about it?” Tears slipped down his face but being a man he was much more quiet and less physical with his crying, His shoulders didn’t shake like hers did but his throat constricted just the same. “What makes you the authority?”

“This was it Justin.” She grabbed hold of the pendant, displaying it to him. “This was the whole fucking point! I can’t look back either. I was looking backward and wondering what my life should have been and I forgot what I could make it into! And I didn’t even see it until I left this morning and I spent all day wandering around with this thing trying to figure out whether to use it or not… you were right about something, Justin.” She continued as he could only watch helplessly, not believing that he was listening to the speech he was listening to.

“And what was that?”

“I remind you of her because we’re so similar… and we are. I got here and I wanted to pretend she was a totally different person but she’s not. I’m capable of everything she is. I proved it, I was her and I pulled it off and obviously something deep had to be the same enough for me to fool everybody. But I got so confused because I didn’t wanna stay here and be her, be this person who never visits her grandma and who has all these horrible people around her everyday and who neglects her family and who… hurt you. And that’s it. That’s IT.”

“I don’t understand, Renee! Make me understand!” Justin begged as he sat on the bed with his head in his hands, his brain swimming in bewilderment.

“I can do everything she did,” she said. “I thought I couldn’t, that I wasn't good enough to make MMC or to do dance classes without Claire, thought that I was the sidekick and she had the talent. But I can. I can do everything your Renee did. I just don’t wanna do it the way she did, and that’s why I’m here.” She took a deep breath and wiped at her eyes. “So any time I start getting my priorities wrong or compromising myself or thinking about getting a frickin’ boob job for a record deal I can remember her and how bad I felt being her.”

“You think she’s such a terrible person?” Justin started to cry a little more as he finally allowed himself to think of his girlfriend.

“Claire told me that a good person is a good person despite their choices.” She sat down next to him and pushed her forehead to his, stroking the back of his head as she talked. “I think she’s just a little lost. And I think she needs you and that’s why I gotta leave. Not just for me but… this isn’t just about my destiny. I’m not your destiny, Justin, or I wouldn’t have had to wish myself into this place. She is, and whatever you decide to do it has to be with her, not me.”

“But I really do like you, Ren.” He sniffled. “I don’t… I want you around. You listen to me.”

“I know.” She cried yet again, just when she thought she was going to stop. “I feel for you, I really do but… it’s just wrong somehow. And you know it too. She’s the one you were meant to be with and for her to stay I have to go.”

“I don’t know if I want you to go.” Justin reached forwards and grabbed her into a tight hug, holding her tightly before looking up at the clock and seeing that it was three minutes until midnight. “I don’t know if maybe everything you said was right or if maybe Renee got put back in the real world so she could fix what fame did to her and you’re supposed to stay here for me or… I need more fucking time!”

Renee too had to look at the clock; her eyes widened as she saw it and clutched Justin back just as tightly.

“I don’t know, I don’t know!” She cried. “I’m still not sure… fuck, can’t I have like ten more minutes?”

Even after everything she’d said and all the thinking and working things out she’d done that day, she still didn’t want to leave him, it still felt wrong to leave him. Thinking about it made her heart rip in two, it really did. It was enough to make her question all the good work she’d done in making everything make sense - was that just as strong a sign that she should stay?

With her face in his hands and a few strands of her hair twisted in his fingers, Justin leaned in and kissed her furiously - desperate to figure it out and not seeing any other way but to kiss her and see how it felt. Renee kissed him back, clutching at her shirt with his fingers and it still felt bittersweet to him.

Then as her nose brushed his he finally understood what he had said to her previously but hadn’t actually registered before – this was her decision and he couldn’t make it for her. He couldn’t tell her how it felt, she had to feel it, and he couldn’t look at it as whether he needed her to stay. Pulling back, tears brimming his eyes again, he looked down at the ominous piece of onyx and then up at her. He ran his fingers over her face, the same face of his girlfriend, the one behind which lay so many different things he couldn’t tell anything apart any more.

“If you’re gonna do it…” He choked out as her fingers latched around his, holding them to her cheek. “You have to do it right now.”

Their eyes met yet again, both equally full of emotion and apprehension, not knowing what the next sixty seconds would bring.