Dinner with the Timberlakes was a little tense.  Justin’s father, Randy, was cordial to say the least, but Cassidy couldn’t help but feel he was a little skeptical about the whole situation.

For the life of her she couldn’t figure out why.  The paternity test had proven her honesty.  Her recent divorce settlement proved she wasn’t after Justin’s money.  Although maybe that was it, after all.  Not the money, but the divorce.  Maybe it was the baggage she carried that made Justin’s father wary.

Whatever it was, she didn’t let it bother her.  He was genuinely nice to her and to Cody.  He didn’t say one thing out of line or give even an inclination of inappropriate behavior.  Still, she got the feeling that he just wasn’t pleased with them being there.

Get the fuck over it was about the only thought she could come up with. 

Justin had given her a brief background on the relationship he had with his father on the way over for dinner.  The drive was fairly short, though, and didn’t allow for much.  Basically he’d told her that he and his father tried to stay close, but there had always been a bit of a strain on their relationship.  He also told her that it wasn’t going to be a lengthy visit.

She was glad, as they had been there for just under three hours and were now saying goodbye and heading out.  Justin hugged his step mom and his two younger brothers and they were out the door.

Before he’d even started the engine of the car, he was apologizing.  “That was kind of weird.  I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize.   They were perfectly nice,” she remarked.

He glanced over at her smugly as he pulled the car forward to head out of the circular drive.  “It’s not you,” Justin continued.  “It has nothing to do with you.  He’s mad at me.”

“Okay…” she said, a little unsure.

“In his eyes, I screwed up.  Luckily things turned out okay, but it could have been a very different situation and he’s pissed off at me for being irresponsible.”

“Well,” Cassidy shrugged.  “He’ll get over it eventually.”

Justin smirked and smiled loosely.  “Yeah, he will.”  Then he looked back at Cody, who was being awfully quiet.  “You awake back there, little man?” 

“Yep,” Cody answered surely.

“How ‘bout stopping for ice cream?” Justin asked.  Then he looked over at Cassidy.  “Mom, is that okay?”

She felt a quiet chuckle sneak from her mouth at the sound of him calling her mom.  “Sounds good to me.”

The ice cream shop was locally owned—no name brand chain like they would have found in L.A.  And the owners new Justin by name—most people did, of course—but this was in a completely different, non-celebrity, hometown kind of way.   It was charming, but it left Cody with lots of questions.

Mainly, how does the ice cream man know “my daddy”?  He’d left off the Justin part and that had made them both smile, although neither of them drew attention to it.

As they sat at a small round table, Cody and Justin both with mint chip cones and Cassidy with her plain vanilla in a cup, Justin explained to his son that he’d known these people ever since he was Cody’s age—that this is where he’d grown up.

More questions followed, along with a good laugh when Cody asked—completely innocent of course—if the ice cream he was eating had been there when his Daddy had been his age too. 

The joy of a four year old.   Cassidy and Justin were both grinning widely when they left.  The strain from dinner was long gone and Cody was clearly getting sleepy as he’d yawned a good three times in a row from the backseat.

Cassidy had been a little worried that he wouldn’t want to go to sleep at a decent hour because of the change in time zones, but he hadn’t had a nap and he’d had a pretty busy day.  Bedtime looked promising, after all.

When they got inside, Lynn and Paul were sitting in the living room, eating a late meal in front of the TV.  “How’d it go?” Justin’s mom asked.

Justin didn’t answer, but Cassidy didn’t miss the look he shot at her.

Cassidy smiled and put a hand to Cody’s shoulder.  “You wanna go give Grandma Lynn and Grandpa Paul hugs before we get ready for bed?” she asked him.

“Okay,” he said eagerly and trotted off towards them.

Watching Cody hug his new grandparents with a smile, Cassidy met up with her little boy again to take him upstairs.   “I’ll be there in a minute,” Justin told her.  She nodded with a grin.

Half an hour later, after Cody had been fully tucked in by both of his parents, Cassidy and Justin went back downstairs to visit with Lynn and Paul before turning in for the night.  The Harless’ made Cassidy feel quite comfortable in their home.  She was already very fond of them both.  But it had been a whirlwind 48 hours and it wasn’t too long before she was saying goodnight herself and heading off to bed.  Justin had told her he’d be up in a little bit.

When Justin finally made it up to bed, he wasn’t surprised to find Cassidy asleep.  It had been a good thirty minutes since he’d told her he’d be up in a few.  He’d been having a nice visit with his mom and Paul.  It wasn’t something he got to do too often. 

The door to his bedroom was partially open.  The TV was on—a rerun of The Real World Season 15, 16 or 17, he’d lost track a long time ago—and Cassidy was curled up on her side, sound asleep.  He smiled at the sight.  Their life had been crazy for the past few days.  He was pretty tired himself. 

Funny thing was—as much as he still wanted her, he didn’t look at her and immediately think sex.  Instead he was thinking about how he couldn’t wait to curl up with her, wrap his arms around her and just enjoy the fact that she was there beside him.

It was kind of crazy.  But it was also special.  Being that he was no stranger to love, or being in love, he recognized the feeling and welcomed it completely.  With a sentimental smile, he changed into a lone pair of cotton pajama pants and crawled into bed.  He scooted up behind her and slung an arm over her waist, burying his nose into the mess of hair at her neck. 

She shifted against him and her arm smoothed on top of his.  “Sorry I fell asleep,” she said groggily.

His hold on her tightened as he pulled her body up against him even more.  “It’s okay.  Don’t say sorry.”

She moaned subtly and took in a deep breath.  “You feel good,” she said, practically humming it.

He smiled against her.   “You feel good, too.”

“I like it here,” she told him.

“I like having you here.”

She shifted again, but this time she was turning in his arms. 

“Hey,” he said, brushing a hand down the back of her head as she settled against him, chest to chest.   “About last night, we never really talked about it and I just want you to know that—”

Her hand found his mouth, her thumb at his lips.  “You don’t have to try to explain.”

He bit at her thumb and she pulled it away.  “I want to say this,” he told her.

“Okay.”

“I just want you to know that I’m not planning to do anything crazy—like propose in the next 24 hours,” he smirked, trying to make light of it.  They hadn’t talked about it and he felt like they should.  He wasn’t exactly embarrassed, like he thought he might be.  But he definitely didn’t want to scare her away. 

Her thumb was at his mouth again, rubbing along his lips.  When it left, her lips replaced it.  She was humming again, and he only took that as a good sign.  But still, as much as he was enjoying her kiss, he felt like he needed her to say something.

Pulling back, he looked her straight in the eye.  “You didn’t say anything,” he said.

“What do you want me to say?” she asked.  “You said you’re not planning anything crazy.  I believe you.”

Lightly he shook his head.   That wasn’t what he meant.  “But did it freak you out?  What you heard me saying to my mom?”

The palm of her hand brushed against his cheek.  Her lips just a breath away.  “Nothing about what’s happening between me and you freaks me out.”  She smirked softly at her words.  “That freaks me out more than anything.”

Funny, he understood exactly what she meant.  “It freaks you out that you’re not freaking out?” he asked with a chortle.

“Pretty much.  Yeah.”

He let the hold he had on her squeeze her even tighter.  “I know exactly how you feel.”

“What is wrong with us?” she asked, shifting her face into the space between his cheek and his pillow.  

“We’re just in love, I guess.” 

Cassidy knew she was in love with him, but when he said it, it made her heart swell.  This indescribable feeling of utter joy welled up in her chest like a balloon on the verge of popping. 

His fingers stroked the back of her head before she pulled away enough to look at his handsome face.  There was so much written in those eyes and she wanted to learn it all.  “That is exactly why I should be freaking out,” she told him.

He grinned, wide and proud, his touch smoothing past her cheek, over her ear and down the side of her neck.  “We’re both barely divorced,” he said softly.

“Yeah, we should have some serious relationship issues right now.”

He smirked and nodded just once.  It seemed that they both knew what they should be feeling even if it was the exact opposite of how they truly felt.  It was the weirdest thing ever!

“I’m not usually so gung ho about getting into a relationship,” she said, her arm curled around his side as she snuck one of her knees in between his legs.  Laying with him felt so amazingly comfortable.  She couldn’t remember ever feeling so comfortable with Jason, and they had been married for almost two years, and dated for nearly four.  “But I can’t even imagine not being with you right now.”   That hadn’t been the easiest thing for her to admit, but he was being so open with his feelings and she felt the need to be too.   She was open about everything else.  There was no need to hold back now.

His lips curled into a smile as he pressed them to her forehead.  “Do you think because we have Cody that it makes what we’re feeling that much stronger?”

She nodded and tilted her chin up to look into his gray-blue eyes again.  “I do.  I don’t necessarily think that’s a bad thing, though.  As long as we’re not trying to be together just for him.”

He kissed her again, this time on the temple.  “I feel like I have been totally blessed to have found the both of you.  Seriously, like my life has done a complete 180 since I saw you that day at the game.  I am so thankful that my mom and Trace talked me into going that day,” he sighed quietly.

“You’re totally over her, though, right?” She’d wanted to ask for so long, but she hadn’t had the courage.  She felt like he was, but past relationships were always a little touchy—especially Justin’s.   She knew how bombarded he was by questions from everyone else.  She felt like she shouldn’t ask.  But she also knew she had to get past that if they really did want to have a serious relationship.

“It wasn’t losing her that I was so upset over.  It was the fact that I failed at something that I wanted so badly.”  He looked her straight in the eye as he spoke and it made his words so much more meaningful.  “Of course now I realize the reason that my marriage failed was because I had married the wrong person.”

She wasn’t sure if he was inferring that Cassidy was the right person, but either way a grin was at her lips.  It just seemed that he could say no wrong.  At any other time in her life she would have serious doubts about a man who said all the right things, but those doubts just weren’t there with Justin.  If he wasn’t being sincere, then she’d turn out to be the biggest fool in the world.  But that couldn’t be the case.  She knew he meant what he said.  She felt it in the very depths of her soul and beyond.

“What about you?  Are you completely over your ex?”

“Yes,” she answered stoutly.  “I fell instantly out of love with him the night he backhanded me across the cheek.”

Justin shot up so fast it startled her.  The look that clouded his eyes was one she’d never seen before, but she recognized it instantly as anger.  She realized at that moment she should have never told him, and she honestly hadn’t meant to.  It just sort of came out.  “He hit you?”

She felt very sheepish at the admittance.  “He did, once, and that’s when I left.”  She kept her voice very calm, hoping it would have the same affect on him.  But it wasn’t working.  He was kneeling on the mattress, trying so hard not to get upset.  His body was stiff, his hands clenching at his sides.

His chin dropped as he was visibly trying to let go of what he was feeling.  He brought a hand to his face and pinched the bridge of his nose.  Then he took in a couple of breaths and looked at her once again.   “I was in a car with him, Cassie.   I spoke to him, face to face, when I should have been beating the shit out of him.”

“Justin, calm down.   He’s paying for it—trust me.   He’ll get his.”

But that obviously wasn’t satisfactory to him.  “What kind of fucking coward hits his wife?”

Shaking her head lightly, she rose to her knees and scooted towards him.  “Look, there’s nothing you can do about it now.  You didn’t know me then.  You hadn’t seen me in years.  It’s part of the past.  It happened once.   I did not stand for it, obviously.  Now he is paying for it—big time, with his checkbook.”

Justin shook his head as his sight dropped between them.  He brought both hands to the side of his head.  “It is really a good thing that I am not in the same town as him right now,” he stated softly.

Something about his will to protect her played big on her heart.  As much as she wanted him to calm down, it felt good to see him so worked up over something that had happened to her months before.  Tugging on his arm, she pulled him back down on the bed.  He laid flat on his back and she curled up against him on her side, her head on his chest.  “That is the last thing you want in the tabloids,” she said.

“Right now I could give a fuck less about the goddamn tabloids.”

For some reason she was smiling, but she wasn’t letting him see it.  “You don’t mean that.  Promise me you won’t do anything crazy.”

“Like what?”

At that she did look at him, rather incredulously.  “Come on.   I know you have a lynch mob of muscle at your disposal.  If you really wanted to hurt him, it would only take a phone call.  I’m not stupid.”

His hand stroked her back.   “As much as I do want to hurt him right now.  I’m not about to stoop so low.  Besides, it wouldn’t give me enough satisfaction if someone else did it.”

She smirked at his words.   “I shouldn’t have told you.”

“No,” he disagreed firmly.  “You should have told me a long time ago.”

Cassidy was smirking again.   “When?”  she asked.  “When was I supposed to tell you?”

“I don’t know… just sometime before now.”

“It’s only been two and a half weeks since you found out about us.  It’s barely been one since we first had sex.  When was I supposed to tell you that I left my ex husband because he smacked me across the face?”

“Can you please stop saying it?” he asked.  Then he continued, “I don’t know, okay.  You just have no idea what hearing something like that does to a man—well, a decent man, anyway.  I suppose if I was a coward that hit his wife, too, then I wouldn’t care so much.”

Smoothing a hand down the center of his bare stomach, she climbed on top of him and kissed his mouth.  “Seeing you all worked up like this is really turning me on,” she mumbled against him.

His arms smoothed around her.   “You’re trying to distract me with sex,” he said.

She grinned wide.  “Damn, it was that obvious?”

He nodded, eyeing her purposely.  “Doesn’t mean it’s not working, though.”

Five days after they arrived in Millington, they were leaving.  Cassidy would have loved to stay longer, but they couldn’t hide forever.  Their lives needed to get back to some type of normal if they planned on having any sort of relationship.  Justin needed to get back to work, Cody needed to get back to Preschool—he’d already missed three weeks—and Cassidy needed to figure out if she was going to try and start up her career again.

So they boarded the private jet at nine a.m. Eastern Time.  They’d arrive just shortly after ten, Pacific Time.

It was a quiet flight.   Cody spent the time working on a couple puzzles that Grandma Lynn had bought him during one of their shopping trips.  Cassidy flipped through the current issue of Cosmopolitan while Justin spent most of the time on the phone, trying to get a feel for what things were like back at home.

Crazy.  He didn’t have to say it for her to know.

“That’s not even an option,” he said into the phone, Cassidy listening in whether she wanted to or not.   He was sitting right next to her.  “I am not going to exploit my son like that.”

“Mommy, what does ex-plote mean?” Cody looked up and asked.  Obviously he was listening to his daddy’s conversation, as well.

“Exploit,” she corrected his pronunciation, “and I’ll explain it to you later,” she said, knowing he’d forget about it in a minute.  She didn’t exactly feel like trying to explain.  It was too complicated for a four year old.  Or maybe it was just too complicated for her to try and put into words he’d understand.

Justin ended the call and looked over at her with a sigh. 

“What was that about?” she asked.

“People wants to put us on the cover—willingly, of course—and do an interview.”  He shook his head.  “No way.”

“What are your people saying?” 

He smirked, probably at the reference to “his people” but Cassidy didn’t know what else to call them.   “You don’t want to know.”

“They’re telling you to do it,” she guessed.

He nodded.  “That once the mystery is gone, the paparazzi won’t be hunting us so badly, but you and I both know that’s not true.  Especially once they find out who you are and who you just divorced.”

She closed her eyes for a moment.  She felt a headache coming on all the sudden. 

“I’m sorry,” he said, “I’m not trying to stress you out.”

“It’s not you that’s stressing me out,” she told him.

“Well, you can say that all you want,” he replied, “but if I wasn’t such a—” he growled, probably because he was holding back a curse, “media draw, then we wouldn’t be going through this problem right now.”

She turned her head to look at him.  “Well, if I hadn’t married one of the top NFL quarterbacks in the league then it wouldn’t be quite so bad, would it?  So you can’t put it all on yourself.  Can you?”

Half a smile graced his lips—those oh-so kissable, soft and smooth lips.  She found herself wanting them against her at that very moment, but she pushed the feeling aside.  Their affection for each other had gradually become more obvious in front of their son—a quick kiss here or a hug there.  But even so, kissing Justin the way she really wanted to, in front of their son, would definitely raise questions that he hadn’t yet felt the need to ask. 

Justin must have sensed her desire, as his half smile turned into a full smile just before he turned his attention to the little boy in the chair across from him and began a conversation about the puzzle Cody was working on.

Cassidy smiled wide as she watched the interaction.  At that moment she felt like nothing could come between them—not even the brigade of photographers that were waiting eagerly outside Justin’s home for his return.

© BrandyRae 2005