The fact that Justin’s mother is coming in less than a week gives me a false sense of hope. I feel like I can deal with anything for the next few days and as soon as she gets here everything will be wonderful. I know that Justin is a completely different person when his mother is around and I can’t wait for that different Justin to come and make my life so much easier.
Until then, I am joined with the asshole Justin. He actually hasn’t been that bad for the past few days. I think it’s because he knows his mother is coming. He also has some time off so he usually can calm down a little during that. Justin does not work well in stressful situations. When he’s off he’s like a lazy bum. I mean, I know he works hard but seriously when he’s off it’s like he’s a couch potato living off his mother’s couch. A normal day in the life of Justin Timberlake when he is off is… wake up around noon, eat breakfast, go lay at the pool and ignore his daughter, go swimming or golfing or play basketball, get dinner, come home and play with his daughter for a few hours and then go back to sleep. Usually he gets drunk at some point throughout the day.
I was enjoying the quiet I got while the Lakers were on television. Ayden was in the cinema room with him, he’s trying to get her as obsessed with basketball as he is. She tries to love it because she already knows it’s one of the few times she can spend with him. It really makes me sad that she’s so young and is already trying to figure out ways to get her father to play with her. I was trying to clean up the kitchen because Justin had the bright idea that he wanted to make pizzas for dinner. He did go all out and they do look good, but he can’t clean up for shit. There’s sauce and cheese among other things all over the place.
It would have been much easier to order.
Ayden walked in quietly and climbed up on a chair as I was washing the counter, “What are you doing here?”
“Daddy says I’m drivin him cwazy.”
I sighed and picked her up twirling her in my arms. It really kills me that he would actually say that to a three year old. “You can come in here and get away from him. Your daddy drives me cwazy.”
Ayden giggled and I placed her down. She really is so adorable and does not deserve to be treated like this. No one does, but she really doesn’t.
“I was just about to make some snickerdoodles, would you care to join me?” her mouth dropped open with excitement and she nodded her head anxiously. “Great, thank you Ayden, I need help and you’re such a good helper.”
The smile grew on her face and she ran to the cupboard, “I’ma help. We need… flour and suga and… mashed potatoes.”
“Mashed potatoes?” I laughed and she nodded her head as if I were crazy not to put mashed potatoes in my snickerdoodles, “I don’t think so hunny. Let’s start with some sugar. We need a big one and a little one,” she pushed the chair closer to the counter and climbed up.
“OK ok, I do it.” She carefully measured the sugar so that it was exactly a cup and a half. She’s already a perfectionist, just like her father. I hope it’s doesn’t become obsessive like him.
“OK, now we need two eggs.”
“I crack em.”
I nodded my head, “OK, but be careful. Let’s crack them in this bowl first,” I don’t think she’s ever cracked an egg without all the shell getting in.
Ayden dropped the two eggs into the bowl and laughed as they cracked. “More, do more!”
I laughed as she reached in and tried to crack the egg again. “We only need two.”
“Oh,” she answered softly and took a few minutes to deal with the defeat, “OK, now we add… mashed potatoes.”
“Ayden! Come here!” we both heard Justin screaming and she looked at me.
“Go ahead.”
She smiled and jumped off the chair and ran to see her father. I know it’s sad, but I wonder why he wants her to go in there with him. I threw the egg and shell mixture in the garbage disposal and cracked some eggs into the sugar myself just as Ayden came skipping back.
“That was fast.”
She giggled and nodded her head, “Daddy wants the Cheetos. He’s gonna share wit me.”
I feel like I’m the mother of two children. I’m not a mother I’m an assistant. I shouldn’t even be here cleaning up the house and making him cookies, but now I have to tell them that we probably shouldn’t be eating Cheetos when we’re having pizza in less than an hour.
“Tell Daddy that I said not to eat too many because we’re eating soon.”
“Mmhmm,” she smiled as I handed her the bag and she went running off.
I continued working on the cookies as my cell rang and I fought with Justin’s ass of a publicist who wants him to go to New York for an appearance on some stupid talk show no one’s heard of. He does not need to go to New York right now, his mother is coming in this week and he sure as hell does not need all the bullshit. I think his publicist is out to get him. Honestly, all this guy cares about is getting his name out there. He wants Justin to do everything and Justin sure as hell does not need his name out there any more than it already is. He also believes in the whole no publicity is bad publicity thing and that scares me. I just don’t trust him.
Ayden came back into the kitchen, as I was busy dealing with the jackass. She opened the refrigerator and looked inside as if she were completely lost. I hung up the phone and took a deep breath, “What are you looking for?”
“Daddy wants the soda in a bottle.”
The soda in a bottle? There is no soda in a bottle, “What kind?”
“He said the beer kind.”
I took a deep breath and grabbed a beer in my left hand and Ayden’s hand with my right. He is such a moron, like honestly I don’t understand what goes on in his fucking mind. Ayden is like his little puppy that he’s training how to fetch. I went into the cinema where he was laying on the couch with the bag of Cheetos resting on his stomach. He looked up at me as I walked in and laughed at the pissed off look I was giving him. “Thanks Sari.”
“Did you ever think that it’s possibly not a good idea to have your three year old daughter get you a beer?”
“I didn’t ask her to get me a beer, I asked her to get me a soda.”
“A beer flavored soda.”
“She doesn’t know what it is. Relax.”
“It’s not a good idea.”
He got that smile on his face and called Ayden over to him before whispering something in her ear.
“Take a valium bitch,” the three year old said to me. Justin laughed as if it were the funniest thing he’s ever done in his life and Ayden giggled just because he was laughing so hard. I don’t find it very funny and I really want his mother to come right now.
“You’re ridiculous,” I said as I walked out of the room.
“Put the pizza in!” he shouted out to me. Ugh, I would much rather put his fucking head in the oven. I hate my job, I hate my job, I hate my job. As I walked back into the kitchen I threw the pizza in the oven and finished the cookies. Someone really needs to give him parenting lessons. They also need to give him life lessons and maybe some fucking lithium.
The phone rang again, this time it was Justin’s accountant telling me she needed him to sign those papers she sent over a few days ago except she never sent them over. Then Ayden came in climbing up the chair and then jumping off it. I managed to get her down but then she decided she wanted to run around the kitchen table and sing the alphabet song… at the top of her lungs. Meanwhile the account is trying to assure me she sent the papers over while I tried to assure her we never got them. And now the oven timer is going off and the house phone is ring and OH MY GOD!! Justin’s screaming for me to answer the phone since he can’t get off his superstar ass and answer his own phone. And Ayden just fell and now she’s crying and oh my god, I can’t do this.
I hung up on the accountant since she’s not listening to me anyway, pulled the pizza out of the oven, picked up Ayden in my arm and picked up the phone. “Yeah?” I rested the phone between my shoulder and my ear so I could help Ayden and get her to stop crying while I rolled her pant leg up to see the cut that didn’t even exist.
“Sari? Is everything all right? It sounds hectic.” It’s Justin’s mother. She always calls when I have no control over the situation. “Where’s Justin?”
“In the other room.”
“What’s he doing?”
“Watching the Lakers.”
She sighed, “He’s not helping?” she didn’t wait for an answer because she already knew it, “Can I talk to him please?”
“Yes,” I took a deep breath, it seems like everything stopped at the same time and I can calm down a little bit.
“Is Ayden with him?”
“No, she’s here. Did you want to talk to her?”
“No, I have to get going I just want to talk to Justin quick.”
“Ok,” she’s mad. I decided I wouldn’t say anything else and walked into the other room and handed Justin the phone, “Your mother.”
He sat up quickly and turned the television on mute, “Hey Ma.”
Even just telling him that his mother is on the phone gets him to sit up straight. I really need to know how she does it. Ayden was still sniffling when I placed her on the counter, “Are you alright?”
“I fall and it hurts,” she pouted, “I needa band aid.”
“Ok, we’ll get one. Are you sleepy hunny?”
She nodded her head, “I wanna go to bed.”
Wow. I’ve never heard her request to go to sleep. “Is something wrong?”
She shook her head, “I just wanna go to bed.”
“Don’t you want to eat first?” Ayden shook her head again, something’s wrong. “What’s the matter Ayden? It makes me sad when you’re sad.”
She grabbed onto my hand and led me upstairs to her room, “Did you know that a cock-a-roach can live for nine days without its head?”
I laughed as I changed her into her pajamas, “I know we read about that earlier, that’s kind of gross isn’t it?”
“No,” she giggled, “They’re my favorite.”
“I know sweetie.”
“I want a cock-a-roach.”
“What?”
“A cock-a-roach. Can I get one?”
“You want a cockroach as a pet?” she nodded her head and I smiled, “I don’t think they make very good pets.”
“What about a turtle? Or a frog? Or a snake?”
“You’ll have to ask your Daddy about that,” I think sometimes she doesn’t understand that I’m not the one that makes those kinds of decisions. Then again if Justin was my father I’d be confused about those things myself.
“Can you lay down wit me and tell me a story?”
I nodded my head and lay in her bed as she ran to get a book and jumped on my lap. She picked out her favorite story and I read it to her while she listened intently. When I finished she put a hand on each of my cheeks and kissed my nose, “I love you Sari.”
“I love you too Ayden,” I kissed her forehead, “Goodnight sweetie.”
“Night!” she smiled and waved as I walked turned the light off and walked downstairs. These are the times that I don’t hate my job. But then I walk downstairs to see Justin sitting at the counter devouring his pizza and drinking a beer and I realize why I do hate it.
I didn’t say anything at first, I just went back to the cookies and waited for him to talk, “So you tell on me.”
“What?”
“You tell my mother on me like I’m fucking five years old.”
“What are you talking about?” he is fucking five years old.
“My mother bitches at me because…”
“I didn’t tell your mother anything,” I broke in. It’s getting late and I’m not ready to deal with his bullshit. “Your mother called and wanted to talk to you. There were like a million things going on and I gave you the phone. That’s it. I didn’t tell on you.”
He chooses to listen to what he wants to listen to. So instead of taking that in his tiny brain he moved on to something he wanted to talk about, “Did you do my clothes?”
“Yes.”
“Where’s Ayden?”
“In bed.”
“It’s 7:30.”
“She was tired,” he nodded his head. You would think that he’d be upset that I put her to bed without giving him the chance to say goodnight but that little thought has never once gone through his fucked up brain.
“What time do I have that interview tomorrow?”
I looked at him for a minute, “Fuck.”
“What?”
“Shit.”
“What’d you do?”
“I forgot you had that interview and you’re supposed to go to the charity thing.”
“Are you fucking serious?” now he’s pissed. Maybe if I wasn’t busy running his life AND his daughter’s life I could focus on other things and not get so distracted.
“OK, relax, I’ll move something around.”
“You’re going to move it around? How the fuck are you going to do that Sari?”
“I don’t know,” I took a deep breath, and once again I hate my job.
“You really fucked up Sari.”
I hate him. I really fucking hate him. “Are you serious? The reason why I fucked up Justin is because I’m so busy with every fucking part of your life. Like can you do anything yourself?”
“What the hell? I do shit myself.”
I laughed at that one and that pissed him off even more so we could scream all night. I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself so I wouldn’t wake up Ayden, “Justin honestly, I can’t do everything. I understand that you have a lot of shit but I can’t be your assistant and a nanny at the same time. You need to get someone else. I’ll take a pay cut if that will help, I mean seriously Justin.”
He took a few deep breaths himself as if he were actually thinking about it. That surprises me a little, I never expected him to consider it. “Alright, we’ll talk about it tomorrow.”
“Thank you. I’m going to go to bed.”
“Yeah, alright. What time tomorrow?”
“Noon.”
He nodded his head, “Alright, goodnight Sari.”
“Night Justin,” I walked through the yard thinking that I possibly made some progress with him. Although, I wouldn’t be surprised if he woke up tomorrow and forgot this whole conversation ever took place. The fact is that I really need some kind of help. I can’t run his life on my own. And obliviously I’m not getting any help from him. But then again, he so paranoid that someone is going to find out he has a daughter who knows if he’s ever going to let someone else actually work for him. I can’t deal with his mood swings much longer.
I called and managed to change the interview to ten so we’d have plenty of time to get to the charity thing at noon. Then I saw it was only eight thirty and that means I can easily take a nice bath and read before I go to bed.
Every single time I think I can take a bath I get interrupted when Justin just walks into my bathroom like it’s nothing. “Seriously Justin!”
He laughed like he always does when he walks in on me naked in a bathtub, “I’m not looking.”
“What do you want?”
“Ayden’s in the other room. I’m having some people over.”
I took a deep breath and nodded my head; I don’t know why he does this so often. “I changed the interview to ten.”
“Alright,” he nodded his head and stepped out of the bathroom, “She’s in the other room though, thanks.”
“You’re welcome,” asshole.
