"Girl, you look like you just got run over by Bey’s entourage," Usher noted, as Christina slowly came pacing into his room. "What’s your deal?"
It was almost four o’clock in the afternoon, and she was still trudging around in her pajamas, which was a rare state for the ever-ready Christina. Ignoring Usher, she sighed and leaned against the doorframe of his closet. "What time is it?"
"It’s 3:48," he answered, turning his alarm clock in her direction. "Did you just wake up?"
"Yes. But only because I was tossing and turning all night."
"Why is that?"
"Did you not hear Justin and Alicia cackling until five in the morning?"
"Honey, please. I was knocked out."
"But she’s so loud. How could you sleep through that?"
"We only hear the things that we wanna hear. So, if Justin and Licia kept you up all night, it’s only because you wanted them to."
"I hope you realize that that makes no sense."
"Well I share a room with the girl and I have no problems getting to sleep."
Christina rolled her eyes and finally took a seat on the bed across from Usher. "You’re just used to her loud ass."
"Okay, so remind me again. What is it that you have against my girl?"
"I have nothing against her. I just don’t like the way she carries herself. I mean, this whole thing that she has going on with Justin - whatever it is - is just wrong."
"What, she can’t like him?"
"Yeah, but the way she hangs all over him and is always in his face, when she knows he has a girlfriend, is terrible."
"Well he knows that he has a girlfriend, and obviously, he doesn’t think that whatever is going on with Alicia is affecting that, so why should she be blamed?"
"That’s exactly my point," she quipped. "She’s allowing this... boy to dictate her actions and string her along when she knows that he has a girlfriend at home. I mean, forget the fact that the poor girl is probably sitting at home thinking that he’s so in love with her, but Alicia is completely playing into it."
You’re a dirty, dirty man
You and that other woman
You’re two of a kind
I just don’t buy Justin’s little innocent country-boy act. I think there’s a lot of unspoken malice just below the surface that’s itching to get out.
"I don’t think that he’s purposely stringing her along," Usher argued. "You ever think that maybe they both just genuinely like one another?"
"Well, then why keep up the charade with Missy? Why doesn’t he just cut her loose?"
"That’s one question I don’t know the answer to. I mean, maybe it’s not so easy to just let go of a five-year relationship."
"And that’s another thing. If he’s been with her for five years, why the hell was it so easy for Alicia to turn his head?"
"Well." He plopped into the four red pillows that decorated his matching bed and rolled his eyes. "I don’t know, honey. He did say that this was their first time apart. He hasn’t had anything else to look at after all this time."
"I dunno about that. I gotta say, I don’t trust Justin. And I just think that there’s an easier way to go about all of this. If they like each other, all they have to do is tell their significant others. Really, how hard is that?"
Usher rolled his eyes one more time and pulled one of his pillows over his head. "Girl, you ask way too many questions."
"Well somebody needs to."
You’re a dirty, dirty man
And you been hiding your little dirt all over this here place
Here’s my chance to throw some mud in your face
‘Cause I’m a good housekeeper
I’m gonna take my broom and sweep all of the dirt out in the street
::::::::::
Lindsay was cuddled up comfortably in the swivel chair that accompanied the computer desk, browsing the Internet and instant messaging her best friend, Hilary, while her roommates were all somewhere scattered across the house after a long day at work. She was deeply enthralled in conversation when Christina did her bowlegged saunter into the Oval Office. "Hi," Lindsay cheerfully greeted her.
Christina remained in the door frame and gave her a weak smile. "Hello."
"What’s up?"
"I wanted to know how long you were gonna be on the computer."
"Do you have some work to do, or do you just want to use it?"
"Does it matter?"
"Well yeah, if you need to work, I’ll be glad to get up right now."
"Oh." Christina was taken back by Lindsay’s willingness in spite of her own attitude. "Um, no just take your time."
"I won’t be long."
She gave her an acknowledging nod and went back on her way out of the area until she heard the phone ring. Lindsay was halfway to the phone when she was knocked out of the way by Christina’s abrasiveness as she rushed to answer the phone herself. "Hello?"
I really, honestly try to be nice to Christina whenever I can. Especially since everyone in the house is so mean, but today, she basically throws me out of the way so she can answer the phone. I don’t know what’s wrong with her, but I don’t like it.
"Christina! What are you doing?" Lindsay screamed.
"Sorry," she hushed, answering the phone again. "Hello?"
"Hey," a female voice replied, " who’s this?"
"You called here," Christina quipped to the quiet country voice on the other end. "Who is this?"
"Oh, I’m sorry. This is Missy. Is Justin there?"
"I’m sorry, too. Hi, Missy." She smiled to herself and sank into the telephone chair. "I’m not sure," she lied. "Linds, could you check and see if Justin is here."
"He is. He ju–."
Christina put a quick finger up to her lips that was supposed to inform Lindsay that she was to shut up. "Missy, could you hold on for just a second?"
"Sure."
"Okay." Quietly, Christina asked her roommate, "Could you give me a minute alone here?"
Confused, and a little intimidated, Lindsay granted her privacy and left for the kitchen. In turn, Christina returned to her phone call. "You still there, Missy?"
"Yeah, I’m here. Did you find Justin?"
"Um, yeah. He should be on his way downstairs."
"Oh, okay."
"So, how have you been?"
"Um, I’ve been great," Missy replied in perplexity. "How about you?"
"I’ve been good."
"Getting along with all the roommates?"
"I’m trying," she chuckled. "It’s hard though, when everyone in the house seems to be attached to someone else, you know?"
"How so?"
"Well you know, Adam and Lindsay are always hanging out, and sometimes with Britney. And then, Alicia and Justin are really close. As well as Ush–."
It’s probably wrong that I went and told Justin’s girlfriend about his quote-unquote ‘friendship’ with Alicia, but what’s more wrong what he’s doing to that poor girl. So I figure what I’m doing is the lesser of two evils, thereby making it all all right.
"Wait," Missy interrupted. "What do you mean when you say that they’re ‘close’?"
"Well, I just mean that they’ve been getting along so well and everything - hanging out whenever they can, in the hot tub all the time, things like that."
"But, I thought they weren’t speaking to each other?"
"Are you kidding? If those two aren’t speaking, then I’m not on the phone with you at this very moment."
"Christina, are you sure?"
"I’m positive."
"Wow."
"Oh, but I don’t think it’s anything that you should worry about. I’m sure that Justin still loves you and everything."
"Yeah," she said, absently. "So um, where did you say Justin was?"
I’m cleaning up my whole house fast as I can
It’s time to make everything spic and span
You’re a dirty man
"Oh, he should be right down. Actually, let me make sure he’s on his way." Christina hopped up from the chair in satisfaction and threw the phone into the seat, while finally informing Justin of his waiting phone call. "Justin! Telephone!"
As he passed Christina in the foyer, he offered her a polite ‘Thank you’ and happily headed to the phone. "Hello?"
"Justin, I said that I was cool with this ‘Real World’ mess, didn’t I?"
Wait, let me take that back
It was you, so I was with it
"Yes," he drawled, somewhat baffled.
"Well, J, it’s just not going to work out if you’re not being honest with me here."
I guess I didn’t get when you showed you didn’t miss it
"Whoa, what are you talkin’ about, babe?"
"I’m talking about you. You and your new... girlfriend."
"What?"
Now it seems that your interest ain’t here and we ain’t the same
"Alicia! I know all about the two of you and all your spending time together."
"Miss, why are you so upset? That’s not a crime, is it?"
"It’s a crime when you’re sitting in a hot tub with her and yet you have me thinking that you’re not even speaking to her!"
I can’t believe that you can’t feel my heart
And I can’t believe you’d let me fall so hard
Stop playing
How could you let it go this far if you had doubts that I wasn’t the one?
"Babe, I think you’re overreacting. I must’ve just forgotten to tell you that we’re friends again."
"Uh-huh. And so, when did that happen?"
"I dunno, maybe a week or so ago."
"Convenient how that’s the last time you called me, J."
And you said that you’re the type to take it slow
And you said, ‘Before I step, I’ll let you know’
Stop playing
Before you let me see you with her, you could have told me a change was gon’ come
"What are you talkin’ about, Missy? We talk everyday."
"Yeah, but it’s only because I call everyday. And it’s really funny how whenever I call, you’re never the one to pick up the phone. You’re always so busy these days."
Is she the reason you don’t call like you used to?
Fall through my hood like you used to
Or put it on me hard like you used to do
"It’s not always because of Licia," he submitted. "Sometimes, I’m in the shower, or maybe eating dinner, or who knows. Maybe I’m with Adam, or Usher - it could be anybody."
"Or maybe you’re somewhere in the hot tub with her, or laying in her bed."
I know in my mind what’s goin’ on, but my heart won’t let me go until I know
"That’s not true. Where are you getting this stuff from?"
Right now, I feel like the lowest of the low. I’m sitting here lying to my girlfriend again when I know that if I get it out in the open now, it would probably be a lot easier in the long run.
"Does it matter?"
"Yeah!"
"Don’t yell at me. I’m the one with the right to be mad right now. Not you!"
"But you’re getting mad over nothing. I’m just friends with her."
Something like this has never come up in our relationship, and I’m scared to find out how she’d handle it. I’m not ready to break her heart yet. Or better yet, I’m not ready to break mine.
"Well your friendship seems like it’s a little bit too close, if you ask me."
Is she the reason that my calls couldn’t reach you?
The deepest of my love couldn’t please you
Or bring it to me home like you used to do
"But where are you getting these ideas from?"
"Justin, I swear to God, if I see you on television making out with her or engaging in some other lewd act with her, I’m gonna be absolutely heartbroken, so I suggest you just tell me now."
Me seein’ her fallin’ for your charm got me feelin’ like I wasn’t good enough
"You’re not even listening to me right now. There’s nothing going on between me and Alicia. We’re just friends, so there’s nothing for you to worry about." Justin sighed heavily, wishing that he didn’t have to choose between adamantly lying to his girlfriend and crushing her. As much as his mind had been consumed with Alicia for the past few days, his heart was with Missy, and he just couldn’t let her go. Not yet, anyway. "Miss, I love you, okay?"
"Really?"
"Yes. Really. And I don’t love anyone else but you, so don’t worry." His heart almost split in two when he heard her sniffle on the other end. "I’m sorry."
"No, Justin. I’m sorry. I jumped to conclusions and lashed out at you instead of talking to you first. It’s just that when Christina was telling me about everything, I started seeing red instead of rational."
"I understand," he reassured her. "I just hope –. Wait. Did you say Christina? As in my roommate Christina?"
I’m sure that Christina has managed to piss off everyone in the house in some way, but this time, she crossed the line.
"Yeah, while we were waiting for you, she told me about how much time you were spending with Alicia, and I got so upset–."
"Yo, Miss, I’ll call you back, okay?" Justin was the one seeing red now, and he was pissed.
"Umm. Yeah. Is everything all right?"
"Yeah, fine. I’ll just call you back." With those last words, he slammed the phone down, into the receiver before she could even respond. He was storming through the bottom layer of the house searching for the person that he deemed responsible for the new mess in his life. "Christina!"
Oh no!
The fights out
I’m ‘bout to punch yo’ lights out
Get the fuck back
Adam and Britney were situated across the landing of the second floor, reading about the company they’d be working for the next week, when Justin came thundering up the escalator, startling both of them.
"Where the fuck is Christina?" he boomed.
The two of them shrugged and darted their eyes towards her room. "Are you all right?" Britney asked.
"Hell fuckin’ no, I’m not all right," he answered quickly, continuing his raging path down the hall.
I been drinkin’ and fussin’ too
And I been thinkin’ of bustin’ you
Upside yo’ motherfuckin’ fo’head
"Justin, wait," Adam called after him, hopping up from the floor. "What’s wrong?"
"That bitch has crossed the line, man. Where is she!"
"Okay, but calm down. You sound way too much like Alicia right now. And that would be great, except I don’t think that I can hold you back, bro."
"Fuck that shit. Where is she! Come out, Christina!"
"Justin. Calm. Down." Adam tried to pull him in the opposing direction of any of the bedrooms and back towards where Britney still sat on the floor, confused.
Now, I don’t know what the hell happened between Justin and Christina - I’m not even sure that I want to know. But he comes thundering up the steps with this raging bull look, and I know that I probably need to keep him away from her.
"Get off me, man! I ain’t gonna hit her. I just wanna talk to her."
"Well, if you calm down, I’ll let you go."
I’m doin’ 100 on the highway
So if you do the speed limit, get the fuck outta my way
I’m DUI, hardly ever caught sober
And you about to get ran the fuck over
"Get off of me," he repeated, wrestling out of Adam’s grasp. He took his ammunition up to the third level, examining every shower stall, every bathroom stall, the game room, and even interrupted Usher in the middle of one of his confessionals. He didn’t stop there, though. He trampled all the way back down to the first floor to start his search again. The five other roommates had gathered somewhere among the middle of the house while Justin went on his rampage.
Move bitch, get out the way
Get out the way, bitch, get out the way
As he passed through the foyer, once again, Christina casually strutted out of her room and parked herself at the balcony’s landing. She looked down to where he stood, frenzied, below her and chuckled. "I hear you’re looking for me?"
"Yeah, I wanna know what the fuck your problem is."
Her tone was complacent, as was her facial expression. "Seems like you’re the one with the problem, don’t you think?"
"Yeah, and it’s because of your big ass mouth. You know, I’d really like to know where the hell you get your nerve."
"Where do you get your nerve, Justin. How dare you treat a woman that way?"
"What way?"
"This!" she yelled, pointing to Alicia. "Missy loves you, but you’d rather fuck her!"
Alicia glared at Christina as she continued to point and accuse her. She was more than tempted to say something, but this was Justin’s battle to fight, and as much as she hated to admit it, Christina was right, on some level or another. She simply knocked Christina’s finger from the side of her face and let them continue.
"Christina, I get it," Justin said, calmly. "You have an opinion on everything. Having it is one thing, but expressing it and injecting it into my personal life just ain’t gonna work."
"Oh, so because she’s your girlfriend, I’m not allowed to give her fair warning that she’s about to get her heart broken? I’m not allowed to tell her that you’re fucking playing the shit out of her!"
"I’m not playing her! I love my girlfriend, and you don’t know anything about what’s going on between us!"
"Oh, please. Let’s not forget that there are cameras watching everything here. Don’t even try to play the innocent card right now, Justin."
Justin was left at a standstill, because, on that subject, she was absolutely right. He was cheating on Missy, whether his head wanted to acknowledge it or not. "You know what card I want you to play? The stay-out-of-my goddamn-business card. What I do with my life has nothing to do with you."
"I refuse to sit back and watch you hurt this girl because you can’t keep your dick in your pants!"
"Missy is not your girlfriend! She’s not yours to care about!"
"I care about any woman that’s being hurt!"
"Then you need to take a look at yourself, you fuckin’ hypocrite, and stop hurting the people around you - the women around you that are wanting to be your friends."
"What?"
"You heard me."
"Don’t try to turn this back around on me. You’re the one doing wrong here."
She is twenty-five
Spent over half of her life so afraid to speak her mind
It’s such a shame, ‘cause oh what a brilliant mind she has
"That may be very true, but you’re no angel, sweetheart. You’re hellbent on being a good Samaritan to every woman you pass on the street, but you can’t find it in your heart to embrace the people you live with. Not even the women. Yeah, I might have fucked up, but at the very least, I know that I have the people in this house to lean on. At least I haven’t pushed everyone away for no goddamn reason. In spite of it all, I know that I’m not alone. And you know what? At least I can admit that I’m not perfect."
"I never said I was perfect."
"Yeah, you just act like it."
And now that she’s been introduced to confidence
She doesn’t see that she is bordering on arrogance
Christina stared down at him, wondering if he was serious. She then stared at the nervous faces of the five other spectators, somewhat embarrassed by everything he’d just said. Their argument, that started with his trivial concerns about his girlfriend, somehow evolved into a venture through some much-needed soul-searching. Justin was right. More importantly, she was, too. But the fact still remained that Justin was right.
When will she learn to come back to the middle?
A solitary tear fell from her mysterious aqua eyes, and she sniffled softly. Very quietly, she relented and retreated towards her room. "I’m sorry."
::::::::::
After the awkwardness of an apology from Christina subsided, the remaining six roommates went back to their usual routine of scattering around the mansion, and avoiding Christina at all costs. This time, however, their reasons for dodging her were completely different. No one knew what to say to her - especially Justin.
So he didn’t say anything. He would nervously bypass the Blue Room where she was silently wrapped up in her comforter, and he kept walking to Alicia’s room. "I feel bad," he announced, crawling into her bed, where she and Usher were strewn across it.
"Girl, I don’t know why," Usher chuckled. "That girl was askin’ for it."
Alicia lightly struck his shoulder and moved over so that Justin could fit on the bed with them. "Shut up."
"I didn’t want to make her cry. I just want her to stay out of my business, you know?"
"Yeah," Alicia nodded. She welcomed his head to rest on her stomach and stroked his dark hair. She thought of how the three of them were laid in her bed, content to be there with one another. She then thought of Christina and how there was no one in her room with her to provide her with warmth and support; no one was in there to stroke her hair and rub her back. She was alone in her desolate blue room while the three of them laughed together in the fervent red room, acting like everything was okay. Sure, Christina deserved it, but we don’t always get what we want in life. "I’ll be right back, y’all." Alicia then wiggled out of the awkward position she’d been laying in and headed to the next room where she found Christina balled up into a lump on her bed, covered by covers.
"Get out," Christina announced, before Alicia could even make it to her bed.
"Listen, bitch. I know I’m not your favorite person in this house - then again, who is? - but I know you’re hurting right now. And I don’t have any wise words or happy thoughts," Alicia answered, sitting at the edge of her roommate’s bed, "but I’m here for you." She softly draped her arm across the clump of Christina and whispered, "It’s gonna be okay."
Christina, feeling the release of Alicia’s weight in her bed, removed her comforter to see her roommate walking out. "Wait," she sniffled.
Alicia turned and waited for her to speak again. "What?"
"I’ve been terrible to you. Why do you care?"
Girl, I can tell you been crying and you’re needing somebody to talk to
Girl, you don’t have to be hiding
Don’t you be ashamed to say he hurt you
"I dunno," she shrugged. "I just know how it feels to be alone." Alicia watched as those lonely tears fell from Christina’s eyes, remembering how desperate she was for a shoulder when everyone wanted her fired. On top of that, she was no stranger to the pain of Justin’s angry words. As much of a hard-ass as Alicia tried to act like she was, she wasn’t cold-hearted, by any means. She sat back down on Christina’s bed and pulled her into her arms. She let her cry on her while the two girls swayed lightly back and forth. "It’s gonna be okay."
Still to come on this season of Real World :: Christina isn’t done yet. Britney’s new boy somehow ends up in Christina’s bed. :: A couple of Real World couples find romance in the Pokonos. :: Usher’s dreams just might come true, thanks to a little persistence and his good friend, Justin. :: The roommates become Seven Strangers to the beauty of Europe and the friendly miracles that only a vacation can provide. :: And wait, are Justin and Missy ever going to break up? :: Find out what happens when Real World returns.
Incomplete
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