Next Day

Waking up next to Katie and feeling her pressed against his side was something he didn’t expect.  But he enjoyed it—more than enjoyed it.  He fucking wanted to live in it.  He laid there for a good while just looking at her, calm and relaxed, her heavy breath against his chest.  He hadn’t really known what was going to happen the night before.  Hell, he didn’t really know what was going to happen when she came out here.  He had no plans for this weekend, no fucking clue what to expect or what to hope or hot hope for.

One night, a week ago, he was home in his bed.  It was past midnight and he knew he should have been thinking about Britney and how to win her back.  But he wasn’t. 

He kept thinking about Katie and thinking about her over and over to the point where he had rolled over, grabbed the phone off his nightstand and dialed her number.  At first he just wanted to talk.  Her voice sounded scratchy and sleepy over the phone, and she teased him that her mom and dad were gonna be mad that the phone rang so late.  He just wanted to see how she was doing.  He had been back and forth, stressed beyond belief with the Transcon bull shit.  He had yet to see her since he had been home for Thanksgiving, and he had been home for a couple days.  She had been busy with classes and other things, and he had been preoccupied. 

It made him and Britney suffer, the stress and the traveling back and forth, and after an explosive fight, she wanted space and he wanted it to be over. 

When Katie’s plane landed and James asked who all was going with him to pick her up, Trace had already started drinking, Rachel had a headache and Justin was…well, nervous.  He figured he’d give himself the extra time before she made it there and would try to chill out and figure how to deal with her being there.

He couldn’t.  It made his mood horrible.  He didn’t want to see her again.  He didn’t want to be lonely and craving it with her there, but he didn’t want to use her again and he didn’t want to fuck up.

The night before couldn’t have been a mistake, feeling her body against his, watching her come, trying to hold it back and be quiet, watching the pleasure ripple over her.  It was almost enough to get him there.  He wanted it last night.  He wanted her hand on him and to just sink down in her skin and body, but he couldn’t let himself do that.  He was on a mission to prove to her that last summer hadn’t been a mistake, and that she had done nothing wrong—that he had just been a fool.

It was gray in his bedroom that morning and outside looked that way, too, whitish and gray.  He could see it snowing.  He didn’t want to leave, but he knew that soon someone would come looking for Katie.

He just hoped it wouldn’t be James.  After his fatherly, annoying attitude the day before, and the looks he had gotten from his brother ever since he told him Katie was coming with them, he was done with his brother and decided it would be best for them to have space during this trip.  James had almost killed him when Justin had confessed what he and Katie had done.  And even though it had been more than a year, James still held it over his head and made sure to make him feel horrible about it.  It’s what cut their camping trip this past summer short.  They had a weekend in the middle of his busy tour to go camping, just them.

But after one night of torrential rain and a yelling match about Katie, about them, about Justin not giving a damn about anyone but himself, and after several slippery shoves in the mud that left Justin laughing and James grumpier than ever, they decided to go home.

They hadn’t spoken about it since then, and after all the bull shit with the label that had happened, James seemed back to his normal self, supportive, quiet, but fun to be around.  He was his brother again and his friend.

But now, now that Katie was there, James was making a point to quietly make Justin feel horrible about everything all over again.

He did feel horrible about it, about what happened afterwards, about how he handled himself, but he never felt horrible for actually doing it with her and taking it that far.

It had been perfect.

“Mmm,” he heard her moaning, curling and sighing as she woke up.

She was perfect, even in all her flaws and insecurities.  He had known it from a child that she and him just fit, whether it was as friends or more.  There was something there he couldn’t explain.  And neither could she.

“Oh my god…”  She jerked for a moment, her eyes squinting, pushing herself up off of him and the mattress, looking down with her arms outstretched, her hair a mess and her breasts swinging down.

“What?” he asked and moved one of his arms behind his head, enjoying the sight of her messy and naked.

She took a breath and then started to smile, and tucked her head into his neck and held onto him tight, relaxing into him.  He could feel her smile against his neck.  She was beaming.  “Morning…”

He felt lazy and wished this morning would last forever.  His voice was a little sad when he simply said, “Hey…” cause he knew it wouldn’t last.  He knew they would have to move.

“You’re naked,” she whispered, still smiling.

He scooted down in the bed and smiled at her, the sheet half off of her torso so he could really see her now in the dim morning light, every curve and piece of skin right there for his viewing.  “So are-“

The rapid banging on his bedroom door made both of them jump and fumble with the covers.  Katie hid underneath them, saying “shit” in a whisper.

“Justin! Wake up!  It’s past 10.” 

It was only Trace.

Justin said a simple ‘thanks’ that it was his best friend and not anyone else.  He breathed deep and said to Katie as she peeked over the covers, “Shit, stay here…” before sliding out of bed, grabbing his boxers off the floor and stepping into them as he approached the door. 

He cracked it open but held it shut as much as possible and said, “Hey um…”

He was about to try to explain it to Trace, but Trace had already started rambling, “Hey do you know where Katie is? I’m trying to wake everyone up and she’s not in her room.” 

Justin licked his lips. 

Trace knew.  Justin had confided in him first.  After he had slept with Katie that summer day, that night he sat in the bedroom in utter amazement and confusion and it wasn’t until two days later, on tour, when he told Trace what had happened.  He was actually glad Trace had been there on tour to talk to.

He was afraid Trace might be mad, might punch him or something for hooking up with his cousin, but he didn’t.  He listened, he was there, and the only real problem Trace had was that Justin had done it right before he had left to go on tour for almost an entire year.

Trace promised never to mention it to Katie that he knew, and he never did.  But Katie didn’t expect him not to know.  She knew how close the two were, maybe even closer than the twins.

It had been Trace, though, and not James who had warned him.  When Justin had started to talk with Britney and hang out with her a lot on the tour, it had been Trace who had warned him and had told him he needed to ‘settle your shit with buzz’ before he got involved with someone else.  James was just angry, at everything.

So when Justin invited Katie out skiing, Trace had said on the plane that it was a good idea, to get his mind off Britney and to try to see what went so wrong before. 

Justin didn’t have to say much to Trace in the doorway to get him to understand why Katie wasn’t in her room.  He bit his lip, raised his eyebrows and opened the door only a few inches more so Trace could see in side.  He muttered, “Uh…”

“Oh…” Trace’s eyes widened and then he cringed, laughing, “Oh shit, sorry.”

“It’s ok.  Is everyone already up?”

“I think James is taking a shower and Rach is downstairs eating.”

“Good.”  Justin nodded, thankful that his brother wasn’t out searching for him or Katie yet, glad he could get Katie snuck back to her room before James noticed.  He didn’t like hiding this from James and knew eventually he would figure it out, but the last thing he wanted to deal with that morning was a grumpy brother and warnings and threats.

“I’m probably just going to hang with Katie today.  I promised her I’d teach her how to ski.”

Trace nodded his head, looked the floor and then narrowed his eyes slightly at Justin, “Be nice to buzz, ok?”

Justin didn’t respond, but he hoped Trace knew he wasn’t going to be an idiot this time.  “Hey, maybe tonight we can all go out and get dinner.”

When Trace smiled, he knew that everything was alright with them, “Cool.”

And everything was alright.  Trace went back down the steps, Justin went back to bed, and after a few slow kisses and stretches and yawns, they both crawled out of bed.  Katie redressed, smiling at Justin as he watched her.  She slipped silently back into her room and got ready for her day.  When she emerged, James, Trace and Rachel were in their gear, James now with a snowboard, ready to start on the slopes.  Trace and Rachel wished her luck with Justin with smiles and laughter, and James just stared.

They left, and Justin and her smiled at each other in the quiet of the house, standing in the kitchen, slurping bowls of cereal.  When they were done, she was beaming, bouncing and excited about their day.  He seemed thoroughly prepared and eager to teach her, despite her teasing and her warnings.  It didn’t matter, she looked so happy he didn’t care that he was about to spend the entire day on a bunny slope.

After a few hours and more falls and bruises than either of them could count, he was still happy and still excited to be with her.

They were sitting on the side of the easiest slope he could find, they had been there all day on that one slope…trying.  She was pouting and he found it cute the way she was just laying there with her legs spread, her skis turned outward, leaning back in the snow, covered in ski gear, like the cutest little marshmallow.

“I’m sorry I suck so bad,” she said pitifully.

He smiled and tossed some snow at her.  “It’s ok, but yeah, you do suck really bad.”

“Hey…” She tossed some snow back and he chuckled lightly when it dissolved and floated in the air, missing him completely.  It was quiet.  A few people skied by them, several were children and Justin watched Katie pout even more as they easily flew down the snow. 

She sighed and didn’t look at him, “Are you having any fun at all?”

He could tell her inability to ski, no matter how much they were joking around, was getting to her.  Katie was a talented girl in many aspects, but she hated being horrible at things.  She never expected to excel in everything, but she tried hard, and failing broke her spirits. 

“Bruising my ass?” he laughed.  “Yeah tons.”

She folded her arms over her chest and said half seriously, half jokingly, “Ass…”

He knew then Katie needed some cheering up, and he scooted closer to her in the snow, pulled his goggles so they were resting on his forehead and pulled down the bandana he had tied around his face.  He smiled at her and rubbed her back through the thick snow suit.  “I’m having a great time with you, even when I’m bruising my ass.”

There was a smile on her face and she pulled off her goggles completely, tossing them into the snow between them.  “Well, I’m sore as hell,” she laughed and he couldn’t help but let her drawling accent make him smile and feel at ease.  He knew, though, she probably was really tense and aching. Yesterday’s events on the slope with James and today’s fumbles and tackles in the snow  by a festive Justin kept her body aching for relaxation.  He knew how she felt.  He was a little sore from skiing all day yesterday and today as well.  And today Katie had tugged him down the slope with her almost every time she tried to ski.  He had fallen almost as much as she had.

He tried to ski near her so he could help her.  It was a lost cause.  But he didn’t really mind falling on her. It was nice to be pressed into the ground with her on top or her underneath him.

It was very nice.

And he kept thinking about that, and waking up to her all naked that morning, watching her get out of bed, staring at her breasts and ass and that sexy little part of her body, that damned V.  He wanted that V.  He dreamt about it, had been for months and months and months, dreaming of touching and fucking her.  He hated to be so vulgar about Katie, but her pussy was something that mesmerized him.  He wanted it so bad.

He couldn’t get it off his mind now.  “You uh,” he scratched his cheek and eyed her sitting there.  “You wanna go back?”

But as much as he wanted her pussy again, he wasn’t planning on having sex with Katie that weekend.  He didn’t want it to fuck anything up.  The night before he had wanted her to realize how much he cared.  He hoped she realized that.

“You’ll be bored.” She rolled her eyes at him, but she was smiling.  And gorgeous.  Just gorgeous.

When had Katherine Lawrence gotten so fucking breathtaking? 

Maybe it was just the glow in her cheeks, the blushing of it from the cold.  Maybe that was just it.  He tried to act like that was all it could be, that she hadn’t grown up to be so beautiful.

But she had, and he knew he wasn’t the only one to notice it.

“Well if you are sore…”  He bit his lip and winked at her, purely teasing, “…there’s the hot tub.”

She laughed at him. “It’s outside and covered in snow!”

“Not the one on the deck.  My bathroom has a big tub.”  He shrugged, “I don’t think it has jets, though. I’ve just used the shower.”

“Justin…”

Her voice was questioning, unsure, but curious.  He wasn’t trying to be a stupid horny guy.  But if she was seriously sore he wanted her to relax.  He had no intention of getting in there with her.  He wanted this to be Katie’s weekend.  He had invited her out, then acted stupid, and he now made a promise to himself to show her a good time, a relaxing time. 

“It’s just a suggestion.  I’m not trying to be a pervert.  You could just use it yourself, ya know, to help you relax…and stuff.”

“Ok!” she said quickly and then leaned over and grabbed his hand.  “Let’s go back.”

Her eyes were dark and sparkling, even in the sun-less sky. 

She made him breathless. “Ok…”

They kicked their skis off and walked down the slope towards the lodge so they could walk back to the cabin.  They laughed and he kept his bandana over his face just incase anyone spotted them.  She called him the snowy bandit and made up some ridiculous story to go along with his appearance.  It made him laugh.  She always made him laugh.  They held hands as best they could in their huge gloves and kept laughing as they slipped on ice and threw snow at one another.

At the cabin Justin told her with a press on the small of her back to go to his bathroom and make herself at home.  She pranced up the steps happily, and he smiled when he heard her call from up there, “Snob!  You got the nicest bathroom in the entire house. I see why you picked this room, super star.”

He continued to put up their ski gear in the closet by the front door and went into the kitchen to get them a snack.  He was hungry after skipping lunch that day and figured when Katie got done they could hang out on the couch and watch a movie.  They could relax, she could take a nap, they could just be together, hang out, nothing sexual.

It was her weekend, not his.

But even so, he was trying to keep his mind off the fact that she would be naked in his bathtub.  He didn’t want to use her for sex, ‘cause it was never about that.  It was always about so much more, so much more that he couldn’t explain.

He tried to drown out his need by humming and singing some melodies in his head, but it didn’t work.  He just thought about the water sloshing around her nipples and how she would look when she got out of it, her body dripping and hot and so fucking slick.

He spread his hands against the counter, hung his head and mentally forced himself to close his eyes and breathe and nothing else.

It started to work, just a little.  He started to calm down.

But then he heard, “Justin?” echo from up stairs.

“Yeah?” he called out to her, moving into the den and staring at the top of the stairs.

“Come help!” He heard her laugh, airy and giggly, “I can’t get it to work.”

He sighed, rolled his eyes and smiled before shuffling up the stairs.  He turned into his bedroom and said, “It’s not hard!  You just turn—” 

He was stopped immediately by seeing her naked body standing there in the doorway of the bathroom.  She was just standing there, completely naked, her hair pulled up on top of her head, smiling.  Her nipples were hard and the little V, that damned little V with a small patch of dark hair just was calling out to him.

“Oh,” he said and kept his mouth in a small “o” formation as he took in every inch of her.

When his eyes met hers she was looking at him defeated, and she shrugged her shoulders, “I lied.  It works. I just wanted to get you up here.  I’m not good at being seductive.”

He widened his eyes and nodded curtly, “Yeah, uh, yeah you are.”

A moment happened, a pause and a breath, and he watched her eye him and swallow forcefully.

“Will you get in with me?” she asked nibbling her lip.  She turned and he just stared at her ass and the curve of her back and the smoothness of the back of her legs as she walked into the bathroom.  The tub was already almost full.  Why had he not heard it running before?  It didn’t matter.  Nothing matttered.  He could only stare as she stepped to the tub and then sank down in the water all the way, only her neck and head and shoulders sticking out.

She stared at him, still biting her lip and finally, he remembered how to move.

He fumbled with all of his clothes and stumbled out of them, tripping over his socks and pants, eagerly, frantically trying to get undressed so he could get in with her.

He wasn’t expecting this, but if it was what she wanted there was no way he would refuse.

She giggled at him and sunk lower into the tub.  He smiled at her as he shook himself out of his boxers and stepped over to the tub and into it.

It was hot, but not so hot that it burned.  It was fucking perfect and she was laying there right for him.

She was still biting her damned lip, and he seriously thought he had never seen anything so sexy in his life, ever.  It was better than any porn he had watched, better than when Britney was sucking his dick.  Better than all of that.

She was there, and she was sexy and laughing and smiling.  He could tell how much she wanted him, how sure she was of it.  It got him there in seconds.

But he wasn’t about to start anything.  This was her show.  Once he was in the tub he felt her smooth legs stretched out beside them and he couldn’t help moving his hand to rub them under the water, smoothing over her calves.  She laughed and pulled her legs up, the tops of her knees peaking out of the water.

She turned, cut the water off and he sucked in a breath as a top of one of her nipples peeked out of the water.  It was so sexy, so naughty, yet classy somehow, not vulgar at all.  And…and it was something else that he just couldn’t explain.

He didn’t want to.  He smiled at her, then leaned back against the end of the tub, resting his arms along the length of it, pressing his head and neck against the edge.  He closed his eyes.

He could get used to this with Katie.  If only she wasn’t a girl from home, if only she was on the road with him all the time, then it could work.  He wished it could work. Those thoughts he couldn’t afford right then and he tried to banish them from his mind.

It was quiet, just the soft sounds of occasional moving water.  He didn’t open his eyes but could feel her watching him and he smiled.  He liked when she watched him. 

“This feels so good.”

She just said “uh huh” and he could tell she was getting in her shy mode.  She wanted him to start it.  He could tell just by her voice that she was curled up, staring at him with wide eyes, biting her lip, waiting on him to make the first move.

“Come lay with me,” he smirked, keeping his eyes closed.  He could hear the sloshing of water, but still she was silent, and he waited to feel her body close to his in the hot water. 

"Are you sure?" It was an odd tone, warning, curious, cautious even.

Before he had a chance to respond he felt her soft, smooth, hot flesh against his.  His eyes opened and then fell shut at the feeling.  Her mouth was right against his exposed neck, lips first then her tongue, softly pressing and bathing his neck. Her legs were tangled with his, and her hand…  God, her hand was everywhere, rubbing against his chest and down to his abs, back and forth, teasing him, teasing him so damn much.

He felt her smile against his neck, then bite the skin lightly as her hand surrounded his dick in the water.  He was hard, fully there, and when her hand touched him, fingers around and gripping, moving up slow and then back down, he moaned out loud and hissed, “Shit."

Katie was ready to pounce on him.  She had been ready since the night before.  And when he opened his eyes and finally really looked at her, he was amazed by what was staring back at him.  She looked so mature and sexy, no sense of fear or uncertainty or shyness that most girls had.  No question about whether or not she wanted it or liked it.  She knew, and in that look he knew how much she was craving it.

He wasn’t sure what had happened to her the past year, if she had dated or slept with anyone, but the look in his eyes made him feel incredible, as if he was the only one she ever wanted.  He liked that feeling and he relaxed, giving her full control and range over his body, loving the feel of her breasts pressing against his chest and her hand against his cock, her lips right there against his neck.

She kissed his neck thoroughly and moved her lips over his jaw, down his cheek and to his mouth.  They kissed passionately for long, sloppy moments until her hand left his body and she shifted. 

His eyes dilated and widened when he realized she was about to straddle him.  Both of her hands were on his face, keeping them kissing, and soon, soon…god almost too soon, she was against him, rubbing them together so he could feel with his cock every fucking thing about her.

She was so good, too good.  How could she be so good?

She kissed him slow and exploring, pulling back with his bottom lip and then smiling, asking in a deep whisper, "Can we have sex?"

 He blinked and heard ringing in his ears.  He stared at her, "Kate...."

She wrapped her arms around his neck and said into his shoulder as he hugged her back, "I want last night again, Justin. I’ve been thinking about it all day…" Her voice was moaning and needy and he felt her hand slip away and down, and she grabbed him again in between them. "But I want this instead."

Something else came over him and he completely lost control, grabbing her hips, kissing her roughly and growling out into her mouth.  He could’ve easily fucked her right there.

But he didn’t. 

Somehow they managed to move out of the tub, dripping and kissing and touching all along the way, soaking the bathroom floor, not minding any towels, just attacking each other with fury.  It wasn’t even cold in the lodge, though he knew it should be after standing out of such warm water.  His body was on fire, but there was little contrast to the hot tub water and the cold air.  His body was a flame.  He was trying his damndest to lead her to the bed so he could calm himself, do this soft, slow, make her comfortable…make it last.

But she wasn’t having it and kept jacking him off and sucking at his mouth, rubbing herself against him, aching and begging for him through her touches and her moans.

“Fuck Kate,” he whispered.

She pulled back and whispered close to him, begging, “Here…”

They were barely inside his room and the water from half of her hair kept dripping against him, droplets teasing and tempting. 

Was this real?  He couldn’t believe it.  Katie…having sex with her that first time was more than real, it was perfect.  But this, this was a new side, hungry and ravenous, so fucking womanly.

She was controlled, but needy.  Seductive, yet somehow shy. 

He never felt more wanted in his life.  It was like from his wildest fantasy, some hot girl just begging him, attacking him, pushing him, and pulling him down on the floor.  She really was pulling him down on the floor.

And this was real life.

“Now..." she moaned.  They were on their knees.  The bed was only two feet away, but it was too far, way too far, and she was pushing him down, pushing him on his back.

He went willingly and she laid on top of him, rubbing her hips against his dick perfectly.  Her breast were soft, nipples puckered and hard, pressing into his chest.  She kissed him and he pulled back, pushing her on her side and saying breathlessly, “It’s been too fucking long.”

“Yeah right, I’m sure you and Br-”

He didn’t want to hear her name, so he cut Katie off and said, “I’m serious Kate.  She wouldn’t let us.”

She stared at him and blinked, all movement stopped.  Time was stalled. “No?"

He sighed, full of want and frustration.  The last thing he wanted to talk about was his ex-girlfriend’s virginity. "She wants to wait or some bull shit.  I mean we do everything else, but not this…”

"Oh."

He rolled his eyes, instantly pissed off and angry, "And whatever!  She's the one fucking with my mind."

After several moments of staring at the wall, his eyes finally focused back in on Katie and she was staring at him, biting her lip…again.

A breath passed between them.

And then it was all over.  He lunged for her and her hands clutched at his face, holding his kiss against hers.  He slid over on top of her and her legs spread immediately.  There was no foreplay.  Last night had been foreplay, all day, falling on her in the slopes, laughing with her back to the lodge, the bath, all of it was the most intense foreplay he’d ever experienced.

And they were both ready, especially her—soaked, opened, smooth, begging for him, hard and deep.

He held his breath and pushed in.  She cried out, but held him tight and sighed.  She wasn’t crying this time and her hips were surging against his.

She was fucking purring.

He looked at her face to make sure she was ok.  And she was.  Her face was like last night, scrunched and intense, fucking taking all of it.  He couldn’t wait.  He couldn’t just lay there any longer.  It had only been a moment, but he needed it and she did, too.  He slid within her and in that movement he gasped, realized his mistake and looked down at her, moving rapidly from where he had had his eyes closed, buried against her cheek. 

"I've used one with every other girl, Katie!” he said rushed and out of breath. She sucked in sharply under him and her eyes opened lazily. “But I don’t..."

"I don’t care right now,” she whispered, her voice low.  She pulled him down closer to her, her arms around his middle, her legs hooked around him, keeping him there.  “I’m on the pill just…” She laughed and he could feel it run through him, “Just shut up and please.”

He moved again and the feeling, smooth and silky, perfect, nothing holding him back was something he wasn’t prepared for.  How could he go back now, after feeling this with her? 

“I’m not used to this,” he said breathless against her neck. Her hips stopped and her fingers paused from where they were gripping against the curls on the back of his head. He pulled back, kissed her briefly and said looking straight in her face, “But fuck we aren’t stopping.  God dammit, Kate…” He groaned and moved with her, thrust after thrust, deep and smooth.  “We’re not stopping.”

They didn’t stop.  It took him long to come laying there on the floor and neither of them minded.  She had never orgasmed with a man inside of her, with Justin there.  And she bit his shoulder when she did and he forced himself deep inside of her, groaning in an animalistic way that neither of them were prepared for.

It frightened them both, and it took them minutes or an hour—they had lost sense of time—laying there, still connected, breathing, and passing out to really move on with their day, if they could move on.  She jerked underneath him for minutes after it had happened, every breath, every movement seemed to make more of her body come just a little bit.  It wasn’t over, yet. 

It was impossible to move and when he finally did she choked a shocking gasp and her body shook for a moment.  They laid there on the carpet, still damp, staring at the ceiling, side by side, breathing. 

They were there for so long, neither of them moved, and all he could do was reach for her hand and hold it.

He didn’t know how this was going to stop, if it could stop.  They had to, at some point they were going to have to get off that floor and continue on with their day and their lives.

But they didn’t stop. Not that day.  They kept going each day, each night and each morning of their vacation.  They were together, all the time, sat beside each other at dinner, sat beside each other on the couch, slept in the same room.  They didn’t hide it from everyone else, but at the same time they didn’t flaunt it.  They didn’t kiss around anyone else, they didn’t giggle or flirt.  That was for just them, only them, it was their little secret.

He kept it that way on purpose and so did she, not for Rachel or Trace’s sake, but for James’.  His quietness on the rest of the trip, his distant nature, showed both of them silently that he knew and that he didn’t approve.  Neither of them wanted to deal with it.  It was a selfish indulgence and they didn’t care.

That night, after they had gone out to eat, Rachel and her had gone to town to buy some things.  Rachel needed tampons and Katie figured she’d keep her company.  When they returned, Justin was in the kitchen getting a beer, and Katie came up to him and whispered that she had gotten him a present and had left it on his bed. 

When he got to his room, he saw a small plastic bag on his messy bed and inside was a box of condoms.  He had held it in his hands for only a moment before dropping it, going out to the top of the stairs and calling out for Katie to come up.  He didn’t care that he was doing this in front of everyone.  He just didn’t care anymore.  James needed to get over it and Trace and his cousin could care less.  He didn’t know why the condoms mattered, why they meant what they did.  It was a free pass, it was a gesture from her proving that she wanted it again and again.  And it kept him from letting the grandness and the intensity of being with her without any barriers overtake him.  It was protection in every since of the word.  It was a tangible thing to keep them from feeling the intensity of coming within each other.

But…it was still intense and nothing, not any little thing, could prevent that.

When she entered his room he shut the door behind her.  She smiled and he took her shoulders in his hands and pressed her against the door.

He didn’t have time to say anything, only smiled at her and then he kissed her, pressing his body against hers.

He had her again on his bed that night.  The small purchase Katie had made gave them room to do this without any regrets or worries, and they couldn’t get enough.  They didn’t know if they’d ever get enough.

It was like that for the entire weekend, complete, unadulterated fun.  But when the weekend was over, which happened quickly and faster than they realized, when they flew back to Memphis, their fun was over, too.  They weren’t together anymore, they really never had been, and after a week of her being back in classes and after a few days of him working on patching up things with Britney, things were back to normal.  She was back with Lucas, struggling to pretend that nothing had happened when she had gone skiing, and Britney and Justin were now more in love than ever.

It was seemingly back to normal.

Neither of them could forget it, though, and somehow, amazingly, after that weekend of being together, purely and intensely, something happened and they were closer, closer than before, closer than when they were younger.

That first time had blown their minds and screwed them and their relationship, but now they accepted it for what it was, it was their secret, their one time, and they cherished it.

Justin reveled in it and Katie claimed to love it, saying they had bonded over their ski trip.  She never gave any clue to feeling otherwise.

But it wasn’t that clear and it really wasn’t that perfect.  Both of them were denying the fact that they had spent all weekend fucking and as much as they tried, they couldn’t just go back from that and expect it never to matter again.

It mattered.  God, did it matter.

Even though they tried to act like it was just a fun weekend, that they had just hooked up and were now the best of buddies because of it, it was more than that. 

So much more. 

He, in turn, delved into his relationship with Britney and Katie, in turn, became a serial dater, unable to commit but unable to be alone.  But they were friends still, very close friends despite the lack of acknowledgement of the one thing that brought them closer together.

They tried to deny it, and would keep denying it, ignoring it and what it meant, but it always would be so much more than either of them could handle.