"Morning."

"Morning."

"Addy's just gone out, not sure where. You're welcome to hang around and wait a while if you like."

"Oh, thanks."

"Breakfast? I was about to do some eggs, you like scrambled?"

"Uhh, sure, thank you."

I have to say this was the last thing I was expecting this morning. It's about ten, but after two long days of shooting and a late night listening to Addy freak out over a little cocaine… well, coming downstairs and having Lily brightly saying hello and offering me eggs wasn't how I envisioned this going. Still, she looks entirely too alert for somebody who spent last night wasted, so I'm guessing she didn't partake in the lines.

It's weird - my image of Addy as a laidback character has taken its strongest hit since I first bumped back into her and she was pissed about the occupational white lie I told her. You'd think after living on an island full of clubs and tourists she'd be a little more acquainted with drugs, but she was freaked. I did my best to tell her it wasn't a big deal, but it's hard to do that without sounding like you're trivialising or condoning shit. I could have told her that there a number of high powered industries with coke running through them and most people still function pretty well, but she seems to equate any and all drug use with being a total crack head. Trying to gently explain that there are places between the addict and clean extremes and the odd night here and there while not great is probably not going to kill anybody was a waste of time I could have spent sleeping.

Still, it was fucked up of Lily to bring that shit in here. That group was obnoxious and it's Addy's home too; it's not fair to bring back a bunch of assholes that are going to take over, bring drugs in and keep her up until some insane time in the morning. If they wanted to do that they should have gone home with somebody who didn't have a room mate to disturb. When Trace and I lived together we had to have that agreement - he knew that sometimes I had shows or promo to do and needed my beauty sleep, so they took the party to somebody else's house. If I was up and awake, it was fair game - but then he didn't bring back anybody I didn't already know.

"So how are you this fine morning?"

Yes, she is definitely too perky to have been on anything. "Cool, little tired."

A frown passes over her face as she reaches into a cupboard and pulls out a mixing bowl and a whisk. "Yeah, I'm really sorry about that, I couldn't get rid of them."

"Rid of them?" I question curiously as without being asked she grabs a glass and pushes it plus the carton of orange juice towards me. I'm hoping that she's going to put enough coffee in the pot for me too. "I thought they were with you."

"They were, but…" She pulls a face at me as she opens a fresh carton of eggs and inspects them for defects or cracks. "Only about half of them are my usual crowd. After the bar closed they all wanted to go back to somebody's and I got volunteered since I have the biggest place, which was fine, but then we got back here and they started blaring that crap music and tipping drugs all over my nice clean table and no matter how many times I told them they needed to go so I could clear up and get to bed they wouldn't leave. Wankers."

"Oh. Way it looked I thought you were all together."

"Well, speed at which you and Addy bolted through here I'm not surprised it looked that way." She doesn't say it in an accusatory way, just gives a light shrug. "Nah, I was out with my usual crowd and they're friends of friends of someone or whatever. They kind of invited themselves."

"Oh. Because I think Addy got the impression they were with you." Has anyone else notice that I'm saying 'oh' a lot?

"Fuck no. From the way they were knocking it back I think they're all total druggies. They'd already drained the bar before we even got back here and they started on coke." Lily shakes her head in disgust and red hair falls out of her ponytail, brushing back across her face. "My lot might do it once in a while but they're not arseholes enough to do it in my house."

"So you don't?" I ask casually, running my finger slowly around the rim of my glass in thought. I don't really care if she does or not, just curious. It seems like Addy got totally the wrong end of the stick last night.

"In the past I have, all of about twice. Never did much for me."

"Me neither."

"So…" Lily looks at me and suddenly I get exactly what Addy meant when she said you can't hide anything from this girl. I don't know if it's purely the green eyes and that slightly piercing quality they have simply by virtue of being an unusual colour, but it's like she's looking through me. If she asks me for my credit card number right now she might just get it - lucky for me she won't ask since she's rich anyway. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Uhh, sure." Oh God, she is going to interrogate me, I knew it.

"How's Addy?"

That's an interesting question. She lives with her for Pete's sake (who is Pete anyway? Pete Wentz?), she should know - and even if she doesn't, why is she asking me instead of Addy? And how do I voice those questions without sounding like a total ass to a woman I barely know?

"Why do you ask?" I sip my juice and try to look equally inquisitorial. I fail, but never mind.

"Because lately she doesn't talk to me and since the last time she did that we were thirteen it scares me shitless."

She's very matter of fact about it, and in the same vein I decide the direct approach is called for. I have no basis for that really; I'm not subtle enough to be able to manipulate this conversation (or any) in that clever sneaky way my mom does when she wants to dig for info, so direct it is.

"That's interesting. Way she tells it you're never here and you never talk to her."

"Really?" She purses her lips and frowns deeply, eyebrows furrowing together in a tight crease above her nose. "Bloody hell. Damned if I know what goes on in that girl's head."

It might be I'm imagining it, but she seems a little forceful as she cracks the eggs into the bowl and starts beating them. Her wrist is moving at a speed nobody but my grandmother is capable of when cooking normally - it's the kind of speed that can usually only be achieved when fuelled by being pissed off. If this was Trace I'd be throwing things out and speculating, see what I get back, but I don't know Lily well enough so sitting back and waiting for her to talk seems like a better idea. Girls always seem to want to talk more about this stuff than guys anyway, so I doubt it'll be long before she does.

It takes her a few moments though. "How much of her life did Addy tell you about last year?" She asks finally.

"Umm… bits and pieces. I probably know more than most but less than some."

"Did she ever mention Rob?"

"Rob? Doesn't ring a bell." "Well, he was this guy who came over from the UK for a holiday, they got together and…"

"Oh wait, wait, wait," I interrupt. "Is this the guy who said he was going to move out there to live with her and then came back with a fiancée in tow?"

"Oh, so she did tell you."

"Real briefly, never got a name though." Now I'm intrigued, what does this have to do with him? As far as I'm aware she hasn't seen him and years, and why would it make her not talk to Lily?

"How much did she say?"

"Heavy thing, he broke her heart, she's never dating a tourist again."

"That's the bare bones, yeah… but it sounds like what she probably didn't tell you is she had a pretty nasty spot of depression after him. Stopped eating, stopped going out, generally worried the shit out of everybody until she got sent to counselling because her mum thought she was anorexic. After that she seemed to snap out of it, though I'm still not entirely convinced she ever got over it properly." Lily explains as she pours the now liquid eggs into a pan and turns the heat on.

Maybe I should feel guilty for not offering to do something; I am a guest in her home after all. Seems a little rude to just sit here and let her wait on me when she barely knows me. Though, I am used to that. It's a pop star thing, people fall all over themselves in really unnecessary ways.

As I'm thinking such mundane things Lily continues on, stirring with one hand and tapping her other fingers against the counter as she does. "Well, I'm having a serious case of déjà vu, because this feels a lot like that again. She's buried herself in this job even though I know it's not really her cup of tea, she always looks like she hasn't slept and I've given up trying to talk to her."

"But she says she's given up trying to talk to you," I butt in. "She says you're never around."

"I'm not now but that was after I gave up, not before, so if she was trying to talk to me she was doing a good job hiding it." She lets out a mournful sigh. "I kept trying to get her out to meet people but she just didn't want to know. I'd wait up for her to get home from work but even then she didn't want to do anything except stare at the TV or something, always said she was too tired to go out even if it was just dinner. To be honest, I think you've become pretty much the only person she'll drag her arse out for and after a while I had to leave her be. I can lead a horse to water but I can't make it drink, and in the meantime it was making me just as miserable sitting in all the time waiting for her to talk to me. I love her, but as my dad rightly says you can't save somebody by sinking with them."

Fucking hell, I was not expecting this.

It makes me supremely uncomfortable because it reminds me way too much of what Rachael said when she thought I wasn't there - that Addy's depressed, won't go out except with us and negative all the time. I don't get it though, she seems fine with me. A little overworked and out of her comfort zone being in LA rather than somewhere more like Adora, but it's not like I look at her and think she's depressed or something. Because if what Lily's saying she's been like now is true, you add that to a history and it actually kind of sounds like she's maybe ill or relapsing or something. And I'd have no idea what the fuck to do with that, never really been around anybody with any mental health issues going on. I'd have no idea how to help.

Trying to equate that with the Addy I've known in LA is hard, because I can't comfortably fit her in either category. It's true that she's not as full of the joys of life as she was on Adora - I can't imagine her coaxing me to kiss her in a lightning storm in downtown Hollywood or anything - but she laughs, she smiles, she makes jokes the same. This not eating thing is news to me, I've seen nothing questionable about her eating habits while she's been with me. Maybe you'd need more knowledge on the subject to accurately assess the situation, I don't know, but if you asked me I'd never think she needed counselling or meds or anything.

It's also only now striking me that I have been having what could be termed a fairly personal conversation about her with the childhood best friend she's barely speaking to. Am I breaking confidences or crossing a line here? Is this even any of my business? I know I have a huge nose but that doesn't mean I like to poke it in where it's not wanted.

"Ahh, I shouldn't drag you into this. She's still talking to you, let's keep it that way." Lily gives me a tight smile and no matter which version of events is the right one, I feel sorry for her. Whatever this thing is standing between them, she looks like she wants it gone.

"Cool," I say as she starts scooping eggs onto plates of toast I hadn't even seen her prepare. Was I really that zoned out? And why is she pouring ketchup on her eggs? Gross.

"So, tell me about you. Your album's out soon, right?"

"About six weeks. Video's premiering next week, I just finished shooting yesterday."

"Oh yeah, I remember helping Jessica pick out a few outfits for it a while ago."

As part of our fusion line deal, we agreed to showcase some of Elena's designs in the video. It's all very subtly done, there's no branding in the picture; I'll just need to mention in a few interviews that she's the designer. I hate those videos that are basically product placements for Nokia or whoever.

"Yep. I haven't seen the final edit yet though."

"What's it about?" She asks in an interested tone as she passes me a very nice looking plate of eggs. They're just the right colour and fluffy; making good scrambled eggs is an art.

"Well," I say as I fork some up. My momma taught me not to speak with my mouth full, but I ignore her advice unless she's here to witness it and smack me upside my head. "It's basically me meeting a girl I used to date in a club with her new guy and then me having flashbacks of when I was with her, except instead of a fight or a hook up or whatever at the end we just kind of acknowledge each other and walk away. It looks better than it sounds."

"No, I can see it." She nods. I find this sometimes with creative types, even if they're not musicians - when you're used to working in any kind of visual medium you can usually picture others pretty well, even if it's not your own. "Sounds cool. I know the song's been on the radio but I haven't had time to give it a proper listen yet."

"Steal Addy's laptop, I gave her the whole album to put on there."

"Hmm." The smile she gives is slightly wistful, but genuine. "And to think last year she thought you worked in a bank, now she's getting exclusives."

"Actually…" I pull my phone out of my pocket and start flicking through my photo gallery. "Maybe you can help me out."

"How so?"

I find the picture I want, me with the model who played my ex, and show it to her. "My friends think she's Addy's twin but I don't see it. Tell it to me straight?"

Lily puffs up her cheeks and lets the air out in a long expression of doubt. "Umm… sorry, but I'm with them. They're not totally alike but I don't know how you could not see it."

"Fuck." I scratch at the back of my neck, because this news is not good.

No matter what shit Rachael and Trace said it was never my intention to cast an Addy lookalike; that would make her really uncomfortable. Fuck, now I've heard it from an unbiased source it makes me really fucking uncomfortable. Addy isn't completely unknown to the press - when they failed to get any pictures of us so much as holding hands or whatever they finally gave up on the idea that we're a couple, but they could very well read into this exactly the same way Rachael did. It's bullshit, and if there was any subconscious part of my brain that intended this it would only be because the song's about her and not because of any current lovin' going on, but even I can see how that looks. Hmm. I might have to call the director with the sudden bright idea of never really letting the audience see her face. If we have the camera angles to support that, which is a big if.

Fuck. Apart from the eggs, this has not been a good morning so far.