One week later...
Damien wants me to go to New York with him! He and his parents are going during Spring Break, so that he can look at colleges out there. He wants to go to NYU and he’s trying to get a scholarship. So far, he’s only gotten a scholarship from Howard and Alabama A&M. What the hell am I going to tell him? I don’t want to go, but his parents are willing to pay for me, and get a room for Damien and I. I might as well go, I don’t have anything else to do.
I still have to talk to mama about it though. She got out of the hospital two days ago, but last night she didn’t feel good. I think she still has to get used to her medications-pricking herself with a needle, isn’t her favorite thing to do ya know. It’s Saturday, and I just got off of work, so I think I’m gonna drop by and visit her. Damien says he wants to tag along and visit her too, which I think is sweet. He and I have definitely been getting along and I think he’s really trying to make a difference, as far as his attitude goes. His game as been getting better too, even though he was already good. He passes the ball more and tries different plays. He even asked Justin for help during yesterday’s game.
Speaking of Justin, I’ve talked to him a little bit. We aren’t the same anymore, and he knows it and respects it. Even though we were only ‘intimate’, if you will, for about two weeks, it still felt like we were more than that. I don’t know how to explain it exactly, but let’s just say that Justin has this thing-I don’t know what it is- that exuberates from him tremendously. To be completely honest, Justin made me think twice, sometimes even three or four times, about my relationship with Damien. The things he told me were always respectful and truthful, whether I wanted to hear them or not. I’ve had the best time with Justin in two weeks than I have with Damien in three years. Honestly, if I ‘d gotten to know Justin more than I already do, I would’ve completely fallen for that boy…man, I should say.
But, he’s not my boyfriend. Technically, I did go behind Damien’s back, so I do need to be fair and give him a chance to change his ways. I’ve known Damien since I was an elementary student-we have history. Damien, Chasity, Jerome, and I have known each other the longest.
I talked to Chasity for three hours this morning. I love her, I really do. We’re trying to go to the same college. I told her everything about Justin and I, and I now keep her on a regular update. Despite what I thought, she told me she’d support me no matter what. She told me that she had no problem with Justin and if we did start something, she’d have our backs.
But, the rest of Calumet? I doubt it. I know I shouldn’t care at all, but analyze it like I do. Calumet was joined with a prep school from the northern suburbs. Many of the white kids left because they were intimidated. But, the ones that are at Calumet now are either troopers, or they’ve lived over here for a long time. They don’t tolerate anything, and neither do the black people. If I, someone popular, were to date someone out of my race…shit would go down. It’s not even about the reputation thing anymore.
Justin was almost jumped at Englewood, just cause he can play ball. Sadly, it all comes down to racism in a dangerous neighborhood, which are two things that shouldn’t be combined.
What would happen if he were to get with someone like me, who has a brother that knows all those ridiculous people? Rodney has beef with everyone at Englewood and everyone in that neighborhood. There are even girls over there that want to fight me. It’s my senior year, and I already get enough crap for being with Damien.
Besides, Justin’s made it clear that he’s going to school in California, and I don’t blame him.
I pulled up to Damien’s house and saw him come out the door, with a smile on his face and flowers in his hand. He got in the car and kissed me on the lips.
“Does your mom like tulips?” He asked.
“I’m sure she’ll be happy you brought them,” My mother doesn’t even like flowers.
“So have you thought about New York?” He interrogated.
Why did he have to go and ask a question like that? Of course I’ve thought about it, but not definitely. “I have to talk to mama about it.”
“I’m sure she’ll say yes,” Damien nodded his head confidently, “She likes me, and she knows my parents.”
Actually, she thinks his mom is a gold digger, but whatever. I didn’t say anything to him; I only nodded my head. It’s always quiet when we’re together, that’s why we don’t talk on the phone unless we have a concrete reason for calling each other. Other than that, we’d rather see each other in person. I need to call Justin tonight…he’ll know what I should do. He knows everything, he’s like my fairy godmother…father. Can you picture Justin with wings? Nevermind…
“What are you grinning about?” I heard my boyfriend say.
I didn’t think I was grinning. “Umm…just thinking about something funny that happened at school.”
“Care to tell?”
No. “Uh…just something that happened between Justin and I,” I shouldn’t have said that so nonchalantly.
I looked over at Damien and saw him tense up slightly. I knew it…I know he’s jealous of Justin, even though he tries to hide it. I shouldn’t have put him in that position in the first place. “It happened in class, nothing major,” I covered. “The teacher wanted him to say something in Spanish, and he said the total opposite.”
Damien nodded his head. Good, he believes me. “Justin’s a nice guy, I guess. He doesn’t start any trouble, and that’s the last thing we need.”
I nodded my head, even though I wasn’t really paying attention. When he talks about Justin, I zone him out because he doesn’t know what he’s talking about…even when he’s trying to complement him.
I pulled into the parking lot of the hospital now, and parked the car. It’s so cold-it snowed last night. We got a good snow last night…a couple of inches even. I zipped my jacket up all the way, pulled my beanie lower, and snuggled into my scarf. Damien and I wrapped our arms around each other’s waists and walked in the large hospital.
Yuck.
I hate the smell of these things. The sound of rubber gloves snapping, sick children whining, and computers buzzing surrounded the bottom floor. Damien and I took the elevator up to the third floor and made our way to the front desk.
I greeted the petite nurse. “We’re here to visit Rhonda Thomas.”
She nodded, and told us the room where my mother was. I hope she’s not sleeping, cause I don’t know if I can bare sitting silently with Damien until she wakes up. We finally walked into the room that she was alone in, unlike the last time she’d been here. She didn’t get along with her roommate because supposedly, he snored.
I saw her look down from the television in the corner and smile at us. I smiled back-she doesn’t even look like she’s sick. She looks good, but when doesn’t she? Mama always makes sure she’s rockin’ the latest clothes, and hairstyles…it’s like she’s still in high school. But, she’s 40…well she likes to say 38.
I stopped eyeing the cramped room, and went over to my mother so that I could give her a hug. “Hey mama.” I stroked her cheek. “How ya been?”
Mama rolled her eyes, “Girl, I’m fine. I just felt a little light-headed earlier.”
I nodded my head. I’m glad she’s holding up okay. Damien walked over now, and handed her the tulips that he’d gotten her. She instructed for him to set them on the counter.
“So, what brings you two over here?” Mama asked.
I sat next to her on the bed and looked at the TV. She was watching the soap operas. Too bad they didn’t have any movies to put in the VCR. “Nothing much. I just wanted to check up on you on my way home from work.”
Suddenly, there was a knock at the door and we all turned our heads to look who was in the doorway. It took the person a moment to enter, but Justin walked in, nonetheless.
What is he doing here? I talked to him the other day and told him that she was back in the hospital, but I didn’t expect him to come and visit. He looks good…he always looks good when his cheeks are pink from the cold weather. And, he’s wearing a white turtle neck shirt, under a jean suit.
My mom smiled so big, I could feel it. She’s taken a very good liking to Mr. Timberlake these days, and we don’t even talk that much anymore. He so polite with her, and she treats him like her son. Whenever he calls, they talk on the phone for a good 15 minutes before she hands it over. Mama opened her arms and motioned for him to come over and give her a hug. I was sure to move out the way before they smothered me, and made my way over to Damien.
“Hey mama,” Justin said softly as he hugged her.
When they pulled away she asked, “What did you bring me? Candy?”
Justin laughed, “No…you don’t need to be eating candy, missy,” He then let a small box and a card come into view. “Open this. The card is from my mom.”
Mama opened the gift as if she were a child at Christmas. I looked over there when I heard her gasp and Justin’s laughter. Oh gosh, no he didn’t. I can’t believe he got her The Brothers DVD…with bonus parts.
“Now you get to watch Shemar all you want,” He smiled.
“No!” I groaned. It’s bad enough that she recorded it and watches Soul Train every Saturday.
Mama rolled her eyes. “Hush your mouth. You didn’t even bring me anything.”
“I come and visit you, and you see me everyday. That should be considered a gift.”
“Ooh, look at lil’ missy cocky over here,” Mama chided.
Damien spoke up, “Well, she knows that’s she’s one of kind.”
Aww. I heard Justin make a disapproving noise, and my mom chuckled and nudged him with her foot. He must have said something smart. I cleared my throat. “Can y’all step outside for a minute? I need to talk to my mom about something.”
The boys nodded, Damien gave me a kiss, and they walked out of the room.
**
Justin followed slowly after Damien, and didn’t bother to look at his teammate when he leaned against the wall. Justin kept walking down the hallway, and on his way to his car. He heard Damien’s footsteps come behind him, and for a split second, he was scared… before he realized that no harm could be done in a hospital.
Justin stopped in the middle of the hallway now, with his back still facing Damien. “What do you want?” he threw at him.
Damien shook his head, even though Justin couldn’t see. “I just want to know why you’re trying to move in on my girl.”
Justin turned and looked at him coldly, causing Damien to put up his guard under such an intense stare. “No one is trying to move in on your girl, since it’s clear that you have her whipped.”
“Well why were you being so nice to her mother?”
Justin shook his head, “What the hell kind of question is that, Damien? The woman is sick, and I happen to have a good relationship with her.”
“How do you have a good relationship with her?”
“That’s none of your business, so I’d appreciate it if you’d stay the fuck out of mine. You don’t see me questioning your petty shit do you? No, I didn’t think so. Now, get the hell out of my got damn face…you disgust me, Damien,” Justin grinned sardonically at Damien’s shocked stare. “Yeah, I said it, and you can tell Melanie too. But, let me tell you something before I go.” Justin slightly pushed Damien against the wall and looked him dead in the face. “Don’t fuck with me anymore. I’m tired of your bullshit, thinking you run things. Don’t think that I don’t hear all the shit you talk and how you continuously try to turn every black person at Calumet against me. Don’t think that I don’t know about what kind of game you’re trying to run on Melanie. Don’t think you’ll be able to get away with it longer either, cause I have no problem telling on people…especially when they’re doing wrong by their girl. You know what? Just don’t think…you’ll hurt yourself.”
Menacingly, with one quick shove, Justin walked away from Damien, not once looking back. Damien, slightly dumfounded, pulled himself off of the wall and watch Justin walk away.
He’d never been spoken to that way before, but he was going to let it slide. “Hey, Justin!” he called.
Justin stopped abruptly and stood there for a few seconds, before turning around and sending him a piercing glare. He said nothing, and just stared as Damien lightly jogged over to him.
Damien spoke once he was face to face with Justin. “Don’t worry about me hurting Melanie. We’ve been together too long for me to do that.”
“Oh yeah?” Justin challenged.
“Yeah,” He said confidently.
“Really? Hmph. You hurt her in some way at least once a day, Damien.”
“What are you talking about here, Justin? You have no clue what you’re talking about. You don’t even know my girl.”
“I know one side of her.”
“Really? And how is that?” Damien rose his eyebrows.
“Don’t worry about it.”
“You know what, Justin?” he shook his head, “You can drop all your fake ass hints all you want, because I don’t care anymore. We’re going to New York for spring break…she’s coming with me to look at NYU.”
Justin scoffed loudly, “You’re not going to get into NYU.”
Damien was beginning to get mad. “Oh and you can do better?”
“Yeah…I have people looking at me from Stanford…for my academics too. I actually know people there, who actually want me at their school.”
Damien rolled his eyes. “Anyway…to the exciting part of our conversation. I’m going to give Melanie this…”
Justin watched Damien pull out a small, velvet black box and felt his heart slowly begin to crumble. He knew what it was just by staring at the box as it laughed in his face. Damien had won again. As things gradually got worse, Damien opened the box to reveal a beautiful, silver ring. Diamonds were encrusted, and even though Justin knew he could do better, it still hurt. He had gotten attached to Melanie and Damien was going to snatch her back.
If she were to say yes, that is.
“What do you think? I love her so much, and I know she loves me too. We’re going to college together, get married, and get an apartment.”
Justin was speechless. He remembered the day when he and Kelice had the same dream.
~~~
The girl giggled happily as she rode down Sunset Boulevard in her boyfriend’s expensive Bentley. Her cinnamon hair billowed in the wind boastfully from just being done at the salon. Her manicured nails played at the back of Justin curly, blonde locks. Kelice loved him and his sense of humor, seeing as if he always had her laughing. The sun shone through the sunroof of his car and she looked through the window and at the large palm trees that were forever swaying in the wind.
Justin looked from the road when he came to a red light, and stared at her. He looked at her from head to manicured toe, just admiring her beauty. Her light bronze skin shone under the oil, and beamed their own rays. She was perfect for him-classy, gorgeous, and sexy. She didn’t wear revealing clothes, the least amount of clothes she wore being her bathing suit. Kelice turned her head and stared at Justin.
“I love you, Jay,” She smiled her million dollar, daddy’s a dentist, smile.
Justin grinned back, flashing his smile. “I love you too, babe.”
Despite the toothy grin he continuously flashed her on their way to JC’s lavish beach house, he felt as dark as the night itself inside. Confusion, trepidation, and sadness filled his emotions all at once, knowing that he’d have to leave California. Things weren’t as peaceful and rich in the nest as they had been before his dad became unfaithful. He would have to leave his friends, Kelice, his school, his ‘singing friends’, and California behind to move to Chicago. That’s what his mother had told him, while in tears anyway. He’d wished that they would be able to go somewhere that was on the coast, but his wish wouldn’t be coming true.
“Babycakes, the light’s green,” She grinned.
Justin looked up, stepped on the gas, and watched the things fly by in a blur. Pretty soon, California would be flying by in an even faster blur from the acceleration of an airplane. He hadn’t told anyone except for his best friend, JC. Justin dreaded the day he’d have to tell Kelice, which was coming up soon, because he knew she would cry…hysterically. She cared a lot about their image and she spent the little free time she got planning their future because they were destined to be together, and she knew it.
Justin pulled onto the street on which JC’s house was located, and slowed down. Already, he could hear the loud, blaring music coming from the house. They had parties at the beach house twice a month and everyone who was popular, seniors and juniors, were invited. Hardly anyone skipped out on it. The police usually broke it up late at night, but the students at Hillside Prep didn’t care. They were rich, their parents were successful, and their relatives left something to each and every one of them in their wills.
Kelice sighed as Justin parked behind a SL600 Mercedes Benz. He’d thought about driving his drop top, but it was windy so he decided against it.
“I can’t wait to get out of here, baby,” Kelice said quietly, and looked at him. “Can you?”
“Hell yeah!” Justin blurted accidentally. “I mean… we still have senior year to go, and that will go by fast, so just hang in there.”
Kelice smiled at him. “Our senior year is going to be the best, boy. We’re gonna be unstoppable…we’re gonna graduate with honors, go to Stanford, and buy an apartment. Then, we can have sex whenever we want!” She threw her hands up at the last part of her sentence. “We’ll be like Bonnie and Clyde!”
Justin laughed at her silly-ness. “You ready, ‘K?” He quoted from Jay-Z’s version, making his girlfriend laugh.
“Come here, you.” Kelice said seductively and pulled him by his collar. “See? I told you Banana Republic looks better on you than Abercrombie.”
Justin rolled his eyes and mumbled, “Whatever.” before kissing her on the lips alluringly. Kelice slightly moaned at his touch, and fought the urge not to jump his bones right then and there. For and extra touch, Justin licked her lips slightly before finally pulling away.
The two stepped out of his car, their lips swollen, and walked hand in hand into the sea of people partying. Justin put his bad news that he had for Kelice on the back burner, and decided to tell her the next day…hopefully, if he had enough courage.
** **
“Yeah, I know it’s nice man, but close your mouth.” With that, Damien closed the small box, the snapping sound echoing through Justin’s brain.
Justin looked up at Damien now. “Don’t you think it’s too early to be asking Melanie to marry you?”
“No. Me and Melanie have been together for a couple of years now, were unstoppable…we’re like Bonnie and Clyde,” Damien smiled proudly.
Justin felt his heart drop and felt his stomach rumble. “Oh.” Was all he managed to blurt out, and somehow he managed to move his legs in the opposite direction and out of the hospital.
If it was cool
It would be me and you
Think of all the nasty things we could do...
Justin: 1 Damien: 2
“If It Was Cool” Brian McKnight (U-turn)
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