Final Goodbye
Dear Journal,
As I write in you I think about the things that went wrong
between JC and I. It’s unbelievable to me that the love we
once shared is now gone. We had a blissful loved that had to
end sadly because of one lie.
Flashback
“Hey Jenny! How are you?” JC said into the cordless phone
he had in his hand. He had met Jenny a while back while
touring. Since he first laid eyes on her he knew he had to
have her no matter what it took. He knew that he had Tiffany
and he loved her to death but he couldn’t contain the urge he
had when it came to Jenny. Was it her smile? The way she
moved? Her beautiful crystal blue eyes? Or her soothing
voice? JC didn’t know, the only thing he knew was that he
had to have her. Like everything JC wanted he always got. It
didn’t take JC too much to get Jenny in the end. He told her
who he was and obviously who would resist a celebrity. JC
and Jenny soon after became an item.
“Hey baby so when am I going to get to see you? I hope you
are not busy with Tiffany.” Jenny said Tiffany’s name in a
nasty matter and JC took notice of it. However, he didn’t feel
like fighting with her at the time. “ I really miss you. I just
wished you would just leave her and just be with me.” Jenny
whined while she played whit her curls that hanged on the
tip of her shoulders.
“Jenny please don’t start this again.” JC was frustrated with
how things were going between Jenny and him. She had
asked him many times before to leave Tiffany and he always
said no. He loved Tiffany too much and wouldn’t even for a
second think about leaving her. Tiffany was his world.
Everything that was him revolved around Tiffany and only
her.
“You know I love Tiffany and I also love you. You knew that I
had a girlfriend when we started dating so why does it
bother you now when you didn’t cared before?” JC walked
towards his room; none of the guy’s knew about Jenny, he
had been able to keep it a secret for 4 months now. For JC,
Jenny was just someone to have fun with in the beginning.
However, as time when on he got to know her better and
she just grew on him. Without even realizing it JC had fallen in
love with her. After telling her she was ecstatic on so was
he.
“I thought I could handle it JC. I thought it wouldn’t hurt to
know that once you left my side you went to be with her. But
it does. It hurts to know that you make love to her the same
way you do to me, that you tell her how much you love her
when I wish you where telling me how much you love me.”
Tears started forming in Jenny’s eyes. When she had first
met JC she honestly wanted him because of his fame.
Nothing more or nothing less. But something happen in the
course of their relationship that changed Jenny’s perspective
of JC. Jenny had fallen head over heals over him.
End of Flashback
I had no clue he was cheating on me. Never in a million years
would I had thought that JC was capable of cheating on me.
We never had problems; everyone told us we were the
perfect couple. I even thought it was true we seem like the
perfect couple always happy. We had even talked about
marriage. How sad that my life with him would never end in
that. JC and I would never have the chance to get married
and have kids. It’s all because of his stupid lies.
I loved JC with all my heart. When he cheated on me I blamed
my self at first. I thought I had done something wrong for him
to cheat on me. But as time when by I realized that it wasn’t
my fault at all. I never asked for him to cheat on me. The only
thing I asked was to be loved by him.
Flashback
Tiffany walked to the guy’s front door and opened it with her
key. The guys had given her a house key since she was like
a sister to them. Also, they always made sure to let her know
that she was always welcome in their home. Once she was
inside the house she started to look for the guy’s. “Hellooooo
is anybody home?” she asked. No answer.
She began walking towards JC room when she abruptly
stopped when she heard JC say, “I love you Jenny.” She felt
like her oxygen was taken away, she couldn’t breathe. She
gasps for breaths of air as tears threaten to fall. She was in
raged with anger. It took everything she had not to let the
tears fall. She wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of seeing her
cry. Also, he wasn’t worth her tears. She composed herself
before storming into JC’s bedroom.
“Who in the hell is Jenny?!” She yelled at the top of her lungs.
“Tiffany…I…I…I,” That was the only thing that came out of
his mouth. He was horrified for he knew that he was about
to lose the one thing he loved the most Tiffany. “What are you
doing here?” He tried to avoid answering her question by
changing the subject.
“Answer me JC, Who in the hell in Jenny!?” JC attempted to
get closer to her but his attempts failed. He tried to take her
hand but she just pushed it away. Now he’s looking at the
woman he truly loves as his world comes crashing down on
him.
Tiffany was disgusted by him. But she was more angry at
him for betraying her.
End of Flashback
I have known JC for many years that him cheating on me
came as a shock. JC had high morals, he never believed in
cheating on a test or anything. So him cheating on me was
just devastating. JC and I were friends first before we
became lovers. We knew that if we took that risk of
becoming lovers it was going to change our friendship
forever. We hadn’t really imagined how much us getting
together would change our friendship. JC was always a
sweet and caring person. He was there for me when my
mother passed away. Also, he was the one that showed me
the light of life when I wanted to die.
Flashback
Tiffany began sobbing into her hands as she fell to the
ground pleading to JC. “Please JC tell me the truth” She
begged for him to tell her the truth.
“I’m sorry Tiffany I didn’t mean too, Jenny and I just happen…”
He turn away in shame as tears fell from his once crystal
blue eyes that now were fill with guilt, shame, and sorrow.
Tiffany began sobbing harder “How could you JC? I loved
you with all my hearth, what about all the plans we made
about sharing our life together.” Her hands were now
trembling. She wanted to slap him so hard for causing her so
much pain but her body wouldn’t let her get off the floor. “But
I guess you didn’t loved me as much as I did since you
cheated on me.” Her voice was full of sarcasm. “Right JC!…
tell me huh did you ever love me at all?” Tiffany’s voice began
to raise with every word she spoke.
JC just stood quite not wanting to speak for fear that he
would realize that what was happening in front of him
wasn‘t a dream. He couldn’t…no he wouldn’t believe that this
was happening to him. He was in a state of denial. “Damit JC
just tell me…” She looked at him as her anger rose with every
passing second. “You don’t have the balls to tell me JC do
you? You never loved me at all!” As she said the last
sentence her voice cracked a bit. Both their hearts ached
with pain. JC turn around hurt by what she said. “No it’s not
true! Tiffany I love you and always will, I’ll admit I did commit a
mistake but I’ve told you how truly sorry I am.” He kneeled
down on the floor right next to her. He cupped her face in
both hands “Tiffany please look me in the eyes” he begged
her. She couldn’t it hurt too much for her to look at the man
who betrayed her.
Her lips tremble as she said to JC “I’m sorry but I can’t” He
begged for her to look at him but she refused. “Please
Tiffany, I…I love you” She pulled herself away from
him. “Sorry JC but I can’t, The only thing left for me to do now
is to forget about this, forget about you and move on. It’s
going to be hard JC but I think you should do the same.” With
that said she stood up and straighten herself up.
“This is are final goodbye JC…So goodbye for good” With
tears in his eyes JC just looked at her from where he was
pitifully kneeling as the love of his life walked away from him
forever. Tiffany walked away with a torn hearth vowing to
never look back.
End of Flashback
It’s been a year since JC and I broke up. I’m not quite over JC
but I’m working on it. The wounds are still bleeding a little. I’m
just hopping for them to soon heal completely. Well the guys
call me once in a while to check up on me and see how I’m
doing. I don’t ask them about JC and they don’t tell me
anything about him. I have forgiven him but like I vowed a
year ago I will never look back. Lance, Chris, Justin, and Joey
will always be my friends and they will also be in my life no
matter what. However, I have left JC in the past and that’s
where he will stay. For those people who are wondering if I
ever regret meeting JC and falling in love with him…well no.
He taught me a lot of things. He taught me how to love and
how to survive on my own. If it wasn’t for him I wouldn’t be
as self-sufficient an as confident as I am right now. In a way
I will like to thank him for opening my eyes to a new begging
in life. So thank you JC. Goodnight Journal.
-Tiffany Clerk
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