Chapter 10: Newsflash: Hell Freezes Over
I step out of the hotel room and on to the small balcony that doesn’t have much of a view of anything but the vacant street. Not much is happening at two in the morning. I open the half empty pack of cigarettes I carry with me wherever I go and remove a cigarette and put it in my mouth. I light it in a hurry, truly needing that nicotine fix more then ever. After taking a long drag I take the cigarette out of my mouth and let it loosely dangle by my side between my index and middle fingers. I exhale finally ridding the smoke from my mouth and the built up tension from my body. There’s nothing like a really good cigarette.
I should be sleeping right now; I have my first concert tomorrow. I’m just too nervous to sleep. I keep thinking about all the things that could possibly go wrong and when I can manage to actually fall asleep that’s all I dream about. So here I am, out smoking a cigarette on my balcony at two in the morning. I really need to quit before I give myself lung cancer and I’ve really been trying to cut down, but it’s just so hard. You can’t get a fix like that from anything else. I never should have started.
“That really is a nasty habit.”
“So you keep telling me.” I grumble, blowing another billow of smoke up into the night air. I turn to lean my hip against the balcony railing so that I can look across the small distance. It takes me a moment to collect myself when I catch sight of him. He’s standing similarity to me, but he’s shirtless wearing just a pair of plaid boxers—his pajamas I’m sure. God he looks incredible.
“Why aren’t you in bed?” Justin voices, breaking me from my appraisal of his godlike body.
“I could ask you the same question.” I answer back with a small smile, pressing the burning tip of my cigarette into the banister.
“I couldn’t sleep.” He answers casually, standing up straight and moving over closer to me with his strong arms crossed over his muscular chest. “I’m too excited about tomorrow.”
“I’m too nervous.” I find myself admitting when I should really be turning away from him and heading right back into my room. The more time I spend around Justin the more I let him back in my life. I will not let back into my life; I can’t.
“You don’t need to be nervous. You’ll knock ‘em dead.”
“Yeah,” I roll my eyes towards the night sky. “Unless I trip and fall on my face or forget the lyrics or like get the hiccups or something.”
“And if you did you certainly wouldn’t be the first nor the last.” He laughs lean on his elbows again, but facing me this time. The balconies are close enough that I think I could climb right over into his if I wanted to…..which I don’t. Really I don’t. “I’ve seen you rehearse and you’re incredible. You have absolutely nothing to worry about. And just remember that you’re holy human and your fans know that so if you screw up a little, you screw up a little. Try not to have a nervous break down on stage.”
“I’ll try to remember that, thanks.” I smile genuinely appreciative of the much needed advice. A surprisingly comfortable silence falls over us. It’s then that wheels in my head begin to turn and I start to think about, not the coming concert, but Justin. I think about how I shouldn’t be out here talking to him right now. I promised Liz that I wouldn’t allow him to do this to me. I’m forgetting about all the crap he’s put me through and getting much to comfortable around him again.
“So how’s Heath?” His mocking voice breaks me from my thoughts. The tone in which he said Heath’s name makes me want to jump over this balcony and slap him. He doesn’t even know him and he’s already judging. Justin of all people has no room to judge anyone.
“What makes you think I would know?” I don’t even know why I said that.
“He’s on the list of approved people to come visit.” He answers in a similar tone to before only sparking my frustration with him further. “I believe he’s listed as a boyfriend.”
“He’s fine, thanks.” I answer back shortly. “How’s Cameron? I believe she was listed as your girlfriend.”
“She’s not my girlfriend.” He says through a low chuckle. “Just a friend.”
“Yeah, so was Allison right?”
“Ouch,” Justin hisses. “I should have seen that one coming.”
“On that note I think I’m gonna head to bed.” I announce with a roll of my eyes as I push of the balcony banister and turn towards the sliding glass door.
“Come on Elli,” He laughs. “We can’t have a conversation anymore?”
“We haven’t had a conversation in three years Justin.”
“Then it’s about time for one isn’t it?”
“Not a two o’clock in the morning it isn’t.” I roll my eyes yet again and get as fart as pulling open the sliding glass door and getting one foot inside before Justin stops me yet again.
“I want to be friends Elli.”
“I’m going to bed.”
“We’re gonna be stuck together on this tour for how many months,” He continues as he didn’t hear a single word I said. “We were friends before we were ever….more, so why not go back to that. I just want to feel comfortable to talk to you when I see you without having to worry about you getting pissed at me.”
“I don’t think that’s such a good idea,” I swallow turning just my head to look over at him.
“Why?” He asks standing up straight again. “Are you afraid something might happened between us?”
I scoff at the suggestion, but only after a moment’s hesitation. That’s exactly what I’m afraid of. I can tell you all till I’m blue in the face that I won’t let Justin get to me again and that I don’t want him, but if an opportunity arose I don’t know if I’d be able to say no and push him away. Anytime he gets close to me my old feelings for him start to resurface and that scares me. I never stopped caring about him.
“I—I—Justin—I have a boyfriend.” I stutter.
“I know,” He grins in that way of his that makes my stomach feel like it’s dropped down to my feet. “Are you afraid something might happen between us?”
“Of course not!” I answer defensively, taking a step away from the open door and turning back to facing him with my arms crossed over my chest. “I don’t think Heath would like it very much. You are, you know…my…a ex-boyfriend.”
Could I stutter a little bit more?
“I don’t want to date you Elli,” He laughs and I frown. “Heath’ll have nothin’ to worry about. Strictly friends—I promise.”
“Whatever, I’m going to bed.”
~(The Following Day)~
“How you holdin’ up sweet cheeks?”
“I’m doing alright,” I laugh, looking up at him through the mirror in front of me, “How are you holding up Jo?”
“I am fantastic!” he answers back, his voice filled with enthusiasm. He comes around to my side and plops down in makeup chair adjacent to mine. “You’re make-up and hair looks gorgeous da-ling.”
I giggle at his silly tone, but am quickly reprimanded by my make-up artist, Katherine, to sit still and not smile. You know when someone tells you not to smile it only makes you want to smile even more. After a few moments of quite giggling between Joey and myself I’m finally able to calm myself down and let my face relax out of a smile again.
“Justin told me you two talked last night…” He prompts, trailing off as if he’s waiting for me to fill in the blanks. Why’s Justin going around telling people we talked last night?
“I couldn’t sleep.” I mumble, trying not to move my mouth too much as Katherine applies a light lip-gloss. “I was nervous about today and he helped to calm my nerves.”
“That was nice of him.”
“What is that supposed to me?” I ask defensively, snapping my head to the side to look over at him. Katherine lets out an annoyed groan and grabs the sides of my head with both hands and redirects me to face the mirror again.
“It means that was nice of him.” He answers with confusion laced in his tone. I over reacted there didn’t I? I need to chill out. “What’s your problem?”
“Nothing!” There I go with the defensive act again. “I guess I’m still just a little nervous about tonight.”
“Well I have something that just may calm those nerves of yours.” He smiles giddily jumping up from his seat and running towards the door. Katherine put the last finishing touches on my makeup and smoothes out my ponytail. She pulls off the paper bib around my neck and spins my chair around so that I can see Joey. I look at him with impatient eyes as he dramatically and very slowly opens to door. He steps half out the doorway before coming back into full view again.
“What is it already!?” I stomp my foot impatiently on the carpeted floor.
“Surprise.” Heath grins sweetly with his arms spread open wide after stepping past Joey. I don’t even try to hide the shocked yet giddy smile that instantly forms on my face at the mere sight of him.
“Hug your man, woman!” Joey yells through his laughter.
“Yeah, come hug your man.” Heath mocks, his grin widening. With a little skip and a hop I run over to him and throw my arms around his neck. His arms slip around my waist and he squeezes me to him in a warm embrace. I can’t believe he’s here and I can’t tell you how much it means to me that he is. I’m already beginning to relax.
“So you’re my man huh?” I ask quietly with a small smirk as I pull back just enough to look at his face.
“Are you trying to suggest that I’m not?”
“You two are just too cute!” Joey gushes and a blush instantly rises to my cheeks.
“Aren’t they though?” At the sound of Justin’s mocking voice my smile instantly falls and I pull away from Heath as if we were just caught doing something wrong. He smiles cockily at us and nods his head in Heath’s direction in acknowledgement as he passes to sit before Katherine.
“I see Joey couldn’t wait to give you your surprise.” Chris comments as he, Lance, and JC enter the room. Heath’s hand seeks out mine and he pulls me to his side where he wraps one of his arms around my waist from the side and presses his lips to my temple.
“He’s from all of us,” JC comments. “Just so you know.”
“And you’ve got him for the whole weekend.” Joey chimes in.
“You make the man sound like a gift card.” Lance laughs.
“Well I thank you.” I smile up at Heath. He lowers his lips to mine in a kiss that can only be described as sweet. Everything about him is sweet. When we pull apart Justin’s eyes are burning into mine. Upon making eye contact his features soften considerably and he smiles stiffly. I smile back just as awkwardly.
This should be an interesting weekend.
TBC.....
