Justin leaned back in his chair, ready to smash his head against the wall as Johnny repeated the words over and over again.

“This stuff is good man,” he said over the phone, “But it’s all the same thing. Heartbreak, loss, betrayal. You’re talking about the same thing in each of these songs.”

“If I’m not mistaken, you told me to write about things I’m feeling at the moment,” Justin said, “and that’s what I came up with. I personally don’t feel anything’s wrong with the songs.”

“Justin, it’s not the songs that I’m worried about. It’s the whole album in general I’m looking at here.”

“And you think I’m not? You think I don’t know that if this solo record doesn’t go well I’m gonna be the one who has to take the fall for it?” Justin’s voice rose, “I already know it, and I’m preparing for it. I just want you to know that I’m not here to please you, or anyone else at the label. I’m here because this is what I feel I HAVE to do for myself.”

“And I respect that,” Johnny pronounced, “we all do. If we didn’t believe you couldn’t do this Justin, we wouldn’t have let you come this far and waste your time. All I’m saying is, just try to find something else to talk about you know? Hit the club or something, take a walk, go visit someplace you’ve never been to… you might catch an idea.”

Justin rubbed a palm roughly against his forehead. “I just, I don’t know. Finding inspiration is tough.”

“Let it find <i>you</i> then.”

He stared out the window of the recording studio, wandering what could possibly be out there that would spark something in his mind.

 Justin sighed and shook his head. “I’ll talk to you later; I’m gonna go grab something to eat. Take care of yourself.”

He hung up his phone in frustration and threw on his jacket.

“Hey Mike, you wanna go get somethin’ to eat?” He asked his bodyguard/friend.

“Who’s paying?” Mike eyed him over the issue of Sports Illustrated he was reading.

Justin chuckled, sliding on his new shades. “I am.”

“Then you don’t even need to ask,” he said getting up. “’Bout time you got out of that room. Must’ve been coming up with a hot track.”

He got into the car, and cranked up the engine. “Nah, not really.”

“You tellin’ me I was sittin’ there for a good three hours, thinking you were making some monster hit and then you come on and tell me you got nothing?” Mike asked, wrinkling his brow.

“Yup,” Justin sighed, backing out of the parking spot. “Seatbelt.”

Mike rolled his eyes, and strapped himself in. “I don’t know what’s come over you dawg, but something’s different. Maybe you gotta go out with the guys or something–”

“No. I don’t need that. I’m done with partying right now Mike,” Justin firmly stated. “I’m focusing on the album right now. I have to.”

“See, that’s your problem right there,” Mike said, pounding his fist against the dashboard, “You push too hard for it. You’re not just letting it come to you. What’s the use in forcing the words to come out, when you already know you’re good at what you do? It’s a matter of clearing your head.”

“Like what?”

“Go somewhere. Do something. See new faces, man.”

“I don’t need distractions.”

“It doesn’t hurt meeting new people.”

“Who said this is about meeting new people? You’re making it sound like I need to go jump into another relationship or something.”

“That’s not what I’m saying, Justin. All I mean is–”

“No, no,” Justin cut in, “I know what you’re saying. You’re saying I need to just toughen up and move on, right? Then maybe I can build up some sorta badass reputation and then it wouldn’t matter if I make good music or not–”

“Are you listening to yourself right now?” Mike questioned, shaking his head. “See this… this is the shit I’m talking about right here. You’re stressing yourself out.”

“You’re stressing me out! The label is stressing me out! The God damn WORLD is stressing me out!” He screamed, forgetting completely he was driving. The drivers behind him began honking, but still he remained unaware. “Getting into this whole thing, I thought I’d know how things were gonna be, and what was gonna happen. I thought I’d be able to figure it out without the guys there, without Britney there… I thought I could do this on my own, my way.”

“You can Justin, it’s just–”

“Let me finish,” he snapped. “I thought I’d be perfectly fine… and now everybody is just proving me wrong. Well then I guess I fucked up! You guys are all right! I’m just gonna stumble flat on my face because I think I know everything when I don’t! Is that what you wanna hear, Mike? Cuz it seems that no one is going to stop until I confess how idiotic I fucking am!”

Mike watched as Justin breathed deeply against the steering wheel, his chest rising and falling. He didn’t say anything, just grabbed the door handle and pushed it open.

“I’m not staying for this shit,” he muttered, before slamming the door.

Justin raised his head as Mike started to stroll down the side walk. He shut his eyes tightly, and began to move the car along his friend.

“Mike,” he called. “Mike… I’m sorry, bro. I didn’t mean what I said.”

The large man didn’t respond. He just kept on walking.

“I’m just under a lot of pressure, that’s all. You know how I get when I’m at my breaking point.” Still, he said nothing. “How about you get in the car, and we talk about it over lunch?”

Mike raised his chin up higher, blocking out the scrawny white man yelling at him.

“Please,” Justin begged, “Just get inside and we’ll talk about it. I’ll explain everything…”

Slowly he stopped his feet and turned to face Justin.

“Let me drive,” he said.

“What?”

“You heard me. Let me drive,” he repeated, walking over to the driver’s seat.

Justin scooted over, letting Mike get behind the wheel. “Where are we going?”

“Just shut up, and wait,” was all he said. “Seatbelt.”

Thirty minutes later, the two pulled up to a small deserted beach. Justin shielded his eyes from the sun, which was setting low already, and checked out the scenery.

“Where are we?” he finally asked, leaning against the front of the car with Mike.

“Delton Beach.”

“Why’d you take me here?”

Mike folded his arms and stared blankly into the ocean. “Because,” he said, “I want you to walk away from this place learning something that I did.”

Justin followed Mike as he strolled along the sand and stayed quiet as he explained.

“See, when I was your age I had this girlfriend, Kelly. She was like the total package, you know? Smart, funny, charming, beautiful, everything in a woman you hope to find. We were together for about four years,” he said quietly, “I thought we were gonna get married, have kids, all that.”

“So what happened?” Justin asked.

“I came here. That’s what.” Mike paused for a moment and ran a hand across his chin. “Came here to clear my thoughts, my life at the time was pretty rough. Little did I know… it was gonna get tougher. I caught her with some other guy… that just shows you how a matter of seconds can change everything you know?”

Justin nodded solemnly, letting his friend continue.

“I was crushed man. I was furious, heartbroken, confused,” he said, “but I eventually got through it. I had to; I wasn’t going to let someone’s mistake become my downfall.”

Justin closed his eyes… partly because he was letting the words sink in, and partly because he didn’t wanna cry in front of Mike.

“She still haunts me; that night still haunts me. But whenever I’m in the area, I come down here. Do you know why?” Justin shrugged. “Because it feels so good knowing I can go back to that moment of devastation, with my head up high and my feet on the ground and I can look back on all the things I’ve done since then. All the good things. I think you know where I’m going with this…”

“I just feel like I can never escape her Mike,” Justin whispered. “I feel like I can’t escape myself. There’s so much riding on my shoulders right now. I feel myself getting weaker and weaker everyday.”

“That’s because you’re letting it eat at you,” he said. “Fear is what’s keeping you back. It’s keeping you back from completely leaving behind everything in the past.”

The sky darkened into a pale lavender as the water settled calmly against the gritty sand. The wind blew against his skin, as he took in the salty aroma of sea water.

“You’re right,” he turned to Mike. “You’re right. I… I’ve been so disconnected lately and I haven’t been myself. I’m just having a tough time with life, that’s all, man. I didn’t mean to take it out on you, though. I’m sorry.”

Mike slapped Justin’s shoulder. “Anytime, bro. That’s what Momma Mike is here for.”

“I’m sorry for blowing up in the car earlier. You didn’t deserve it; I don’t know what came over me,” he said. “It won’t happen again, I swear.”

“Good. Next time you do that crap again,” Mike warned, “Imma pop your face in.”