If you talked to me hmmm...about three years ago when I was 19 this is what I would have to say about love. Fuck love. I hated love, everything about it. My friends all had boyfriends and were all so ridiculously happy it made me sick. I still did not believe in this thing they called love, maybe because I had never experienced it and all the relationships I had been in at that age were shit.
Lets see, well I've only had two serious relationships at that point. At least I thought they were serious, they both lasted more than five months and I had sex with both of them. Does that make them serious? It classified as serious in my books. First off when I was 17 there was Jake Winters, do you know who Jake Winters is? Well he was only the sexiest thing that came to television.
And he dated me, which was a shocker. I met him at my mom's night club. He was 19 and I was 17. Not bad. Well, the thing I didn't know was that Jake was using me to make himself appear as a wholesome guy. He had a serious relationship with a fat girl. It was good for his image. Well he fucked around on my like no tomorrow. Good choice for my first serious boyfriend, don't you think?
And secondly, there was Phillippe Antonio. He was a gorgeous model, but not well known at all. I don't know if that’s why he dated me, because getting press from me was not the way to climb the ladder in America. I was not famous at all except for my fling with Jake Winters, all I had was a dad who was an awesome director and he owned 4 different stadiums across the states all inherited and my mom had like 6 nightclubs. We were behind the scenes famous, but really really rich. My friends were really famous too but I liked to stay away from the spotlight.
But Phillippe, that ended up with me walking in on him making out with another guy. Yep, Phillippe was gay. My mom blamed me for turning him that way. Gorgeous men aren't straight one day and gay the next, it was all your doing Cassandra. Leave the good looking ones alone. That’s what my mom said to me. Real nice, don’t you think?
Oh wait, I'm sorry I haven't described myself yet. My bad. Well I'm on the shorter side, about 5'3 and I weighed close to 150, I was about a size 10/11. I had abit of a tummy and big hips. My mom said the only good part about me being overweight was that I had big boobs and a nice ass. But on the upside I wasn't an ugly fat chick, I had a really pretty face. My face was super clear; I had nice brown eyes and full lips. But I had glasses that could go either way. My mom hated my glasses, saying they hid my big brown eyes but my dad said I looked sophisticated.
Also I had thin legs. Isn't that weird? The top part of my body totally contradicted the body part of my body. It kinda made me look un-proportioned or so I thought.
The worst part is, my mom used to be a model and has the perfect figure, that she constantly flaunts in my face. Well because of her my self esteem is shot to hell, you'll never hear her compliment me as I continue my story.
As a teenager, I was bulimic for a while, got addicted to a couple drugs and drank a lot. I had a lot of downs back in the day.
Well getting past all that shit, let's really start this story with the day I met Justin...
Are you curious yet?
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