“That girl is so beautiful.” Lynn coos as she watches Tessa color with her grandfather.
“She asked for my key and I’m moving some of my stuff out tonight when I drop Tessa off.” Justin states sadly, taking his eyes from his precious daughter to look back at his mother.
“What do you want me to say?” She snaps. “You brought all this on yourself and you know it. I warned you didn’t I?”
“Yeah, but I didn’t listen.” He laughs bitterly truly hating himself at this very moment. “She hates me. I can see it in her eyes. I really blew it this time Ma. I don’t think I can fix this.”
“I’m not gonna lie to you honey,” Lynn prompts. “You may not be able to that’s something you need to be prepared for.”
“How exactly am I supposed to prepare myself for something like that? Andrea and Tessa are my whole life.”
As if on cue Tessa comes running over to her daddy waving a picture in her hand. Justin smiles down at his daughter and hoists her up on his lap to look at what she brought him. It’s a picture she drew for him of their family; it’s the three of them—Justin, Andrea, and Tessa. He knows this because their labeled mom, dad, and me. He sinks his teeth into his bottom lip to try to hold back his emotions.
“I drew this for you daddy.” She giggles, pointing out who is who in the picture. “Do you like it?”
“I love it baby.”
“When are you coming home?” She asks cutely. Justin looks down into her sad little eyes and finds he doesn’t have the heart to tell her that he won’t be home anytime soon. He can’t tell her that her mother won’t let him in the house and just asked him for his key.
“Soon sweetie.” He lies, forcing a smile for her sake. After talking with Andrea he’s thinking he’ll never be going home again. He’s going to have to move back home with his parents until he has enough time to find another place. Maybe he could call Trace and Elisha and beg them to let him stay with them. He loves his mom and all but she can be a bit of a….uh nag at times. She would constantly be on his case about every little thing and right now that’s the last thing he wants to deal with.
Right now he needs to focus solely on getting his wife back.
~*~*~
“So how are you holding up?” Trace asks sympathetically. Andrea sighs in annoyance and inwardly rolls her eyes at the question. “Sorry, everyone probably asks you that.”
“Don’t worry about it.” She shrugs and turns to begin wiping down the kitchen counters. She always does this with she’s upset—cleaning until her fingers are numb.
“So how are you doing?”
Andrea stops scrubbing at the countertops and hunches over, her head hanging low. Trace watches in silence waiting for her to answer his question, to just say something. He can tell that she’s trying to get her emotions under control before she answers and she’s having a tough time doing that. She’s a wreck, but still trying to be strong and make people think that she’s fine. She’s not fine though. She cries herself to sleep every night, that is when she actually sleeps. Everything reminds her of Justin and with every reminder she misses him and what they used to have even more.
“Rea?” Trace voices quietly, taking a few short steps towards her. Justin came up with the nickname ‘Rea’ for Andrea on their second date. He claimed that Andrea was too formal and suggested Dre. Andrea wrinkled her nose at the name and Rea was decided on.
Andrea inhales sharply and loudly exhales as she tries to hold her tears at bay. She adjusts herself so that she’s standing up straight and presses the base of her palm into her forehead. Her hand then runs over her head and down her ponytail in frustration. Trace reaches a hand out to touch her shoulder, but she jerks way from him abruptly and waves him way with her hand.
“I’m fine.”
“I can tell you’re not fine.”
“Okay, I’m not fine!” She snaps at him, twirling around to face him. “How could I be fine?! My husband of nearly five years f**king cheated on me and now I’m all alone in this huge house. Tessa is the only reason I even get out of bed in the morning! I hate him for putting me through this yet I’m still madly in love with him. Is that more of what you wanted to hear Trace?”
Trace watches helplessly, from a distance, as tears fall uncontrollably from her eyes as she yells her frustrations at him. There really isn’t anything he can say or do to make her feel any better. Well besides maybe somehow inventing a time machine and going back in time and stopping Justin from taking Cameron back to his hotel to ‘talk.’ Trace had been out at a club with Justin when he met up with Cameron the first time. He knew of Justin’s attraction to her and the problems she’d already caused in his marriage. When he saw Justin leave with the blond bombshell wrapped around his arm he didn’t do anything to stop him. He was sick of keeping a constant watch over his friend. Trace was engaged and he had no problem keeping his pants on. He wasn’t a damn babysitter.
“I’m sorry,” Andrea apologies softly with an embarrassed smile. She rubs her hands over her tear stained face in a weak attempt to clean her face. “I didn’t mean to yell at you. I’m just…I don’t know….pissed at the world.” She laughs bitterly.
“It’s okay. I understand.”
“You know sometimes,” She starts, “I wonder what would have happened if you hadn’t told me.”
After a few weeks of random hookups with Ms. Diaz and covering for Justin when Andrea would call wondering where her husband was, Trace snapped and told Andrea everything. It was the hardest thing he’d ever done in his life. He turned on his best friend and helped to break of his marriage. He’ll never forget that phone call as long as he lives. Andrea was dead silent after he told her. She just said ‘okay, thanks for telling me’ and that was it. She was so eerily calm. Andrea always had a temper, just as Justin and her reacting so calmly to something so monumental was very uncharacteristic.
“I can’t help but think that I would be happy right now,” Andrea continues, her eyes glossing over with unfallen tears. “Ignorance is bliss right?”
“Andrea I only told you because—”
“I’m glad you told me. I would like to think that I would have figured it out on my own eventually.”
“God,” She sighs, again pressing her palms to her temples. “I’m so messed up now. I just don’t understand why he did this and when I ask him he just tells me he doesn’t know. How does he not know?”
“He didn’t talk to me about it. I know it wasn’t your fault though so please don’t blame yourself.”
“I’m trying not to.” She answers shakily as she continues to struggle holding back her tears. “I’m just so miserable Trace. I don’t know what to do with myself. I never thought I would ever have to go through something like this and I really don’t think I’m strong enough. I’ve lost the love of my life and you only get one of those, you know?”
Trace, fighting with his own tears now, takes purposeful steps towards her and pulls her trembling body into his arms. She clings to him as she sobs into his shoulder mumbling words he can’t understand through her violent sobs. His heart goes out to the poor woman. He knew she would take all this hard, but he had no idea how torn up she was. Seeing his friend like this made him want to go find Justin and beat the living daylights out of him.
“I’m sorry,” Andrea sniffs, pulling away from Trace and grabbing a dishcloth to wipe her eyes with. “I shouldn’t be unloading all this stuff on you.”
“I’m here for you Rea in any way you need me.” He answers sincerely concerned. “And so is Elisha. If you need to talk at two in the morning or just need a shoulder to cry on you call okay.”
She nod, tears creeping up on her yet again and mutters a quiet thank you. She hates crying, but she hurts so badly she can’t stop herself from constantly breaking down. Just yesterday she started sobbing in the grocery store when she got the cereal isle because it reminded her of Justin and his love of the stuff. The kind of pain she’s feeling is like nothing she’s every experienced. The pain rips through her whole body, even reaching to her toes. It’s like an aching feeling of emptiness that just won’t go away no mater how many tears she sheds.
“I bet you wish you had just said okay when I told you I was fine, huh?” Andrea laughs off, as she’s able to control her emotions for a time. Trace doesn’t laugh at her attempt to lighten the mood though. She used to have such a bright smile and just had a light that surrounded her. She was the Cinderella of the ball that everyone noticed from the moment she walked in. That light was gone now though. Justin took that from her and she would never be the same because of it. She just looked tired and sad and just like she was in constant pain. As her friend this was hard for Trace to see. And she was getting thin too. He could tell she wasn’t eating or sleeping—she needed someone to watch over her.
“Why don’t you come and stay with me and Elisha for a few days?” He suggests hopefully.
“That’s sweet of you Trace,” She smiles sincerely, running her hand down his arm affectionately. “but I’m okay here and I think I might go visit my mom and spend a couple weeks with her.”
“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” He asks skeptically. Andrea’s mother, to put it lightly, was not too thrilled with the idea of her and Justin getting married so soon after meeting. She told them it was too soon and the marriage wouldn’t last. An ‘I told you so’ may just be in store for Andrea when she gets home. That’s what Trace is afraid of. She needs support and an understanding shoulder to cry on right now.
“I think….I think I need to get out of this house and no offense to you and Lisha, but I’m trying to get away from Justin and you both just remind me of him. I have enough trouble looking at our daughter without bursting into tears.”
“I understand. Just remember that we’re here if you need anything.”
“I know and I really appreciate that.”
“Have you considered leaving Tessa here with Justin while you get away?”
“Yeah,” She nods and Trace can already tell that she doesn’t like the idea. “I was thinking about it since she hasn’t seen him in how long since he was touring, but I don’t know how long I’m going to need and I don’t want to part with her for that long.”
“Don’t you think it’s going to be hard on Justin to be away from Tessa?”
“He can come see her whenever he wants.” She answers through clenched teeth. At this point it’s still difficult to even consider his feelings in the smallest matters. She’s at the point where she doesn’t care how much he’s hurting and almost wants him to experience some of the pain he’s put her through. She knows that she can’t be that cold to him though. And not allowing Justin to see Tessa would hurt their daughter too badly for her to deny him access to her. “Don’t worry I’m going to talk to him about it first.”
TBC.....
