He knew he had to fight to get his life back, because he had to get it back. It didn’t matter how long it took, just as long as he did it. But right at that moment his mind was clogged with other things that needed to be cleared up first.

            He sat silently opposite Johnny, not knowing which room they were in or what Johnny’s face said. Justin mutely wondered what everyone in the room was thinking.

            I had been a few days since he had talked to the guys, and everyday they had called, reassuring him they would be there for him, especially JC.

            “Justin,” Johnny’s voice was low and hollow, and broke through his thoughts. “We need to discuss this kid.” Justin nodded slightly and sighed heavily.

            “I know,” he whispered and ran his hands against the table top. “I’m just afraid of this becoming public, I don’t need that Johnny.”

            “I know kid,” Johnny’s voice replied and placed a hand on Justin’s arm. “I know you’re worried about that but we’re going to do our best to try and keep it under wraps. Besides you need to focus on other things right now.” Justin produced a small smile for his manager and gave a little nod.

            “So what is the final decision?” Justin asked coming back to the issue at hand and he head Johnny sigh. “Johnny?”

            “We’re still talking to the driver and the truck company J,” Johnny’s voice said, “But we can’t go any further without your account of what happened that day.”

            “Johnny I…” Justin began not wanting to go there, he had become reclusive over the past few days.

            “J, I know it’s hard for you…” Johnny’s voice replied but was cut off by the doctor who was sitting in on the meeting for Justin’s sake.

            “Justin, we know it’s hard for you but you need to be able to say what happened out aloud you know that, or else you won’t really recover emotionally,” Dr Hart’s voice explained gently and received a small nod from Justin.

            “I know,” he answered softly and placed his chin on his chest. “Where do you want me to start?” It was as if he was giving in, defeated by everything he knew.

            “You don’t have to do it now,” Johnny’s voice answered but paused as the lawyer said something quietly to him, something that Justin didn’t quite catch. “Why don’t you start with when you got on the bike?”

            “Okay,” Justin nodded and took a deep breath in as he relived the events of that day.

            He felt as if he was out of breath, as if he hadn’t been able to breathe in a long while now. He sat in the dark, succumbed by darkness. He wondered where everyone had gone to, leaving him to deal with his problems alone.

            He knew that after he had relived his ordeal from that fateful day, that is was supposed to help him, sort of make him accept it more. But it didn’t. He didn’t feel as if it helped him, in fact he felt as if it had just made things worse.

            “Justin are you okay?” Justin lifted his head slowly as a hand placed itself on his shoulder.

            “Hi Anna,” he whispered, his voice almost gone from pain and fear.

            “Are you alright?” Anna’s voice asked him again and Justin nodded slowly, before shaking his head.

            “Ye.. No, no I’m not,” he mumbled and out his head in his hands.

            “Why? What happened?” Justin heard her pull a chair up, as she sat down next to him. Her hand never leaving his shoulder.

            “I can’t write music anymore,” he said softly, as if scared to reveal the truth.

            “What do you mean?” Anna’s voice asked in a kindly tone. Justin shrugged and took a deep breath in.

            “They found out that I have more severe damage on the right side of my brain than my left from the accident,” he replied, “My musical awareness has been messed up.”

            “Oh Justin I’m sorry,” Anna’s voice replied with sincerity, “But don’t worry you’ll get it back.”

            “That’s what everyone keeps telling me,” He replied, “They said I need to fight to get it back, but I don’t know if I can do that. I mean I know everyone is behind me but…”

            “You have to try Justin,” Anna’s voice replied and she squeezed his shoulder for reassurance. “You know Justin, my daughter used to be just like you.”

            “You have a daughter?” Justin asked, his ears pricking up almost like a dog’s. Anna sighed, before continuing.

            “Yes, I have a daughter,” she replied, “A few years ago she was in a similar situation as you were. She had been riding on the back of her boyfriend’s bike when they crashed.” There were tears in Anna’s voice as she spoke.

            “I’m sorry,” Justin whispered and bowed his head.

            “That’s alright,” Anna’s voice replied, “Anyways she sustained major brain damage after the accident, and the doctors said she would never be normal again. But I didn’t accept it, her music has always been her life, I knew it was what she needed to get better. So I helped fight to get that insight to music back, everyday I would make her sit at that piano and play something for me. Eventually she recovered what she lost, now she’s one of the top students at Julliard.”

            “Did she want it back?” Justin asked and Anna sighed.

            “She did, but she was like you. She didn’t believe in herself enough to believe she could get what she loved back,” Anna’s voice said and Justin smiled.

            “So you think I can get it back? I mean…” Justin began and Anna cut him off gently.

            “Yes Justin,” she replied with a smile to her voice, “I think you can because you’re so much like her. You have a fire inside you, a fire that has a passion for music. You can’t let that passion die.”

            He was still trying to register what Anna had said a few days earlier when he sat at the final family group session. He heard nothing, but around him the excited voices of his family and friends chirped. They were eager to have him back, and knew that he could cope on his own in the outside world. The only problem was Justin didn’t think he could.

            “Welcome everybody,” Dr Hart’s voice welcomed everybody, and the chatter slowly faded away. “Well I guess today is Justin’s last day with us here. Would anyone like to say anything?”

            “I do!” Joey’s high and energetic voice cut through the silence.

            “Yes Joey?” Dr Hart’s voice asked.

            “I just wanna say how proud I am of J,” Joey’s voice stated. There was proud ness laced in Joey’s voice as he continued, “I think we all are, right guys?” There was a unanimous agreement in the room, before Dr Hart cut in.

            “Well I’m glad to hear it, because we here at the center think Justin has made a drastic improvement from when he first arrived,” Dr Hart began. Justin felt his throat get caught up in his throat; he knew he should say something now or it would be too late.

            “Dr Hart?” his voice was squeaky but it caused everyone to stop and look at him.

            “Yes Justin?” Dr Hart’s voice was kind and soft.

            “I want to stay longer,” he stated, and there was dead silence in the room before anyone spoke.

            “What? Why?” the voices intertwined in his ears before he could finish.

            “J, why would you want that? You’ve improved so much,” JC’s voice asked through all the noise. Justin shrugged and took a deep breath in, knowing what he was about to say would be the best thing for him.

            “I know I have,” he replied, “But I still need more time. I need to be here, there are things that I need to sort out before I go.”

            “Like what?” Joey’s voice was filled with hurt, and maybe a bit of anger.

            “Like…” Justin began; he knew he was hurting the guys, “Like I need to be able to come to terms with the fact that right now I can’t make music.”

            “But J, we can help you,” JC’s voice was strained. Justin nodded and bowed his head.

            “I know, that’s why I need to stay. I need to understand why it happened to me,” he replied, “In order to move on and try and get it back.”

            “But Justin..” Johnny began before Dr Hart interrupted.

            “I know you are all upset by Justin’s decision as well as shocked, but I believe it is a good thing,” Dr Hart began and continued before the protests could begin, “I think Justin is right, and I’m glad he was able to come to the conclusion himself.”

            “We’re not angry,” his mother’s voice said, “We’re just a bit shocked I guess. I never thought Justin would grow up so fast, but he has. And I agree with you doctor, I think this is the best decision yet.”

            “But Lynn…” JC’s voice argued but Lynn cut him off.

            “No JC, you know as well as I do this is the best decision that Justin can make,” Lynn replied, “And if it’s what he wants, we can’t deny him that.”

            “Fine,” came the grumbled reply. Justin knew everyone was upset at his decision, but it was what he needed to do. And for once in his life, he was going to make the right decision, he was going to be selfish for the right reasons this time. Because like Anna said, he couldn’t let the fire die.