“You what?” Justin asks in utter shock the next day as he and Rea come over for our usual Saturday night get together with Matt.

            “I nothing,” I repeat, “He just invited himself over without letting me reply.”

            “It’s true,” Alex states from the side of the room where he and the kids are playing dinosaurs.

            “Alex, will you stop acting like a five year old and come back to adult land for a minute to discuss this?” Justin asks as Alex tickles Sara, who in the process squeals with delight.

            “There’s nothing to discuss,” Alex says with a laugh from his position on the floor. “We’ll just lock him out.”

            “And pretend we’re not here?” I ask with hope and Rea and Justin laugh.

            “Josh maybe an idiot when it comes to treating people with respect, but he’s not that stupid,” Rea replies and Justin nods in agreement.

            “Yeah, he’ll see the cars outside,” Justin says and I shake my head.

            “But you and Alex can park the cars round the corner,” I say and Alex stops what he’s doing to sit up and look at me.

            “Neither Justin nor I am wasting our precious fuel just because Joshy boy is turning up uninvited,” Alex says and picks up Sara with one arm and Matt with the other and swirling them around.

            “Well we better do something,” I say, “Because I for one don’t want him to come in here.”

            “Who says that he’ll come?” Rea asks sitting next to Justin, “I mean he’s never kept his word, so why would he start now?”

            “Because he refused to let me answer him?” I ask in suggestion and Justin laughs.

            “He may refuse to let you answer him, but that doesn’t mean he won’t come. You know Joshy boy,” Justin says. Now even though Justin and Josh haven’t spoken in like years, Justin still knows Josh better than anyone in this room.

            “That’s true,” I say wondering why I’m stressing, “I suppose he won’t come so why am I stressing?” The other three laugh and I sigh as I watch my daughter run away from Alex and Matt.

            “Because you’re worried about Sara and how Josh’s presence will affect her,” Rea replies in reason and I nod. But I’m not to sure that’s why, because we have been talking bad about Josh for about an hour now and Sara hasn’t really cared.

 I mean, she knows who Josh is. She knows her dad is called Josh, she also knows that both Justin and Alex hate her father, but for some reason that doesn’t bother her. Then again she’s been around Alex’s influence too much, so it’s no surprise to me.

“I don’t…” I begin but just as I’m about to point this out to the other three, Josh and his impeccable timing interrupts and we all know it’s him.

“Ahhh Joshy boy and his perfect timing,” Alex mutters as he leaves the kids and walks over to us. “So who should answer it?” He asks this with anticipation because he hopes I will allow him to open the door and once again beat up Josh.

You’re probably asking about the case that Josh slammed on Alex and Justin, well after Sara was born that seemed like a charm in disguise because Josh seemed to forget that he had slapped a case on the other two. So that’s what happened, Josh disappeared as did the charges against Justin and Alex.

“I think I should,” I say and get up brushing down my pants. “Sara honey, daddy’s here.” Now Sara knows her father is coming today, I told her this morning. And at first she was ecstatic, but soon that died down and now she couldn’t care less if the Easter bunny was here.

“Oh okay,” Sara says and continues playing with Matt, not even batting an eyelid.

“Honey don’t you want to come see daddy with me? I’m sure he’ll be happy to see you,” I say and Sara sighs as she looks at me.

“Do I have to mommy?” Sara asks and I hear Alex whistle with disapproval. I nudge him to shut up and smile at Sara as the door bell goes again.

“Yes honey,” I say and walk over to her. My daughter nods at me as I pick her up and push her hair out of her eyes. “Let’s go see your daddy.”

“Okay mommy,” Sara says as we walk towards the door and as we do I see the light in my daughter’s eyes disappear.

Now as I open the door, I feel kind of bad because as I do so I nearly drop my daughter and you want to know why? Because of Mr Josh himself. Now as we all know Josh knows how to make any woman get turned on by just looking in her direction, he also knows that if he looks like gold he’ll probably get what he wants. Right now, he looks like gold.

“Hey,” Josh says with a super sweet, super sexy voice. “How are my favourite girls doing?”

“Hi,” I reply after I’m able to speak. “We’re okay, right honey?”

“Yeah,” Sara replies shyly and buries her head in my shoulder.

“Sara honey, say hello to your father,” I say putting a finger under her chin and making her look at me.

“Hi daddy,” Sara says in a soft voice that makes both me and Josh smile.

“Hi baby,” he says and looks at me. “Can I hold her?” Now Josh maybe an idiot, but he still has some manners even if they are limited.

“Sure,” I whisper and pass Sara to him. Sara squirms in my arms, but lets her father hold her without much protest. “Come in.”

Josh nods and I let him walk into the house, not for a moment letting my eyes off my daughter. As he walks in Alex decides to pop up and say something.

“Ahhh Joshy boy, you made it,” Alex says with sarcasm dripping off his lips and I roll my eyes. Josh however chooses to ignore this as he walks right past Alex and into the front room where Justin and Rea are with Matt. “How rude!” Alex whispers to me and I just laugh as we follow close behind Josh.

“Josh,” Justin’s voice says, and it’s as cold as icy water.

“Justin,” Josh says in as equal amount of coldness. I roll my eyes at these boys and walk past them to sit next to Rea who seems to be ignoring the fact that Josh is even in the room by focusing all her attention on her son.

“Rea, say hi to Josh,” I hiss in her ear. Rea looks up without even blinking and just gives a nod in Josh’s direction.

“Josh,” she says but at least her voice is not that cold. But don’t let that fool you; this is Rea’s way of being cold. Have you ever heard the saying keep your friends close but enemies closer? Well that’s Rea, and right now, that’s what she’s doing, I can smell it like a rat can smell cheese.

“Rea,” Josh says as smoothly and as calmly as ever. “Who’s this?” He nods in the direction of Matt who runs over to his father and hides behind his legs.

“This is Matt, my son,” Justin says with the same cold tone. Now I have no clue why Josh asks who Matt is because he knows Justin has a son, but then again Josh can be oblivious to things sometimes.

“Hi Matt,” Josh says. Now Josh, there is one thing Josh is perfect at, and that is being good with kids. Josh is like a God when it comes to kids, and no matter how bad he is all that will be removed when you see him with a child. He puts down our daughter and kneels beside her so he’s eye level with Matt. “I’m Josh.”

“Hi,” Matt says shyly and begins to come out from behind his father’s legs to face Josh. “Are you Sara’s daddy?”

Now I know I said Sara hasn’t seen Josh since she was a week old, but he did call even if it was three months apart and she’s seen pictures of him so she knows what he looks like.

“Yeah I am,” Josh says slowly as Sara comes over to me and climbs onto my lap. “Isn’t that right Sara?”

“Yes daddy,” Sara whispers and looks at me with her pretty blue eyes scared. “Mommy can we eat now? I’m hungry.”

“Yes honey we can,” I say and take her in my arms as I stand up.

“Matt honey you want some food?” Rea asks her son following my suit. Matt looks up to his mother and nods. “Okay then, let’s leave these boys to chat.” As I walk out with Sara, Rea walks over and picks up her son, following me out the door.

As we leave the boys, I know we’ll be back in a few minutes to save Josh from Alex and Justin’s wrath but for now let them beat the shit out of him.

Josh leaves a few hours later, without a hitch, until now that is. Why is it that he has the uncanny ability to spring surprises on everyone? And why is it that these surprises always have to be the worst ever?

“I want Sara to meet my parents,” Josh says as he leaves and I sigh. Now Sara hasn’t met any of Josh’s family ever, and he’s had five years to do so, so why now? He has the worst timing ever.

“I don’t know,” I say, because well I’m pretty sure Josh’s parents don’t want anything to do with me, pretty much less my daughter.

“They’ll love her,” Josh lies. There we go; he’s starting with the lies again. He hasn’t been with his daughter for even a day and he’s lying. Damn, he doesn’t waste time does he?

“I’ll have to think about it,” I say and wait for him to go mad, have a hussy fit, but he doesn’t instead he just nods.

“Okay then here,” he says and then do you know what he gives me? A business card, as if his child is a business deal. I was shocked and in the world of Josh, that’s a big thing. “So you can call.”

“Um, thanks,” I reply because really what can I say? Thanks I’ll make an appointment? Yeah right.

“Well then I’d better go,” Josh says with a smile and then he leaves, without even a goodbye. I find this is a new thing with Josh, just coming and going as he pleases without even a common goodbye.

“No,” Alex says as I tell him about Josh’s postpostrous idea about Sara meeting the parents.

“That’s what I thought,” I reply, “I mean he wasn’t even with Sara for a day and he’s lying out of his teeth.”

“As usual,” Alex replies with a roll of the eyes. “I’m glad he’s gone, one more minute with him and he’d be dead.” I laugh at this, because we all know Alex hates Josh. I’m surprised we didn’t have to call the cops.

“I’m sure Alex,” I say between laughs, “But I’m pretty sure that will be the last time you see him.” I say this because as we all have been witness to, Josh never comes when he says he will.

“Actually I’m surprised he came today,” Alex says with a nod. “But I’m sure he had an agenda.”

“Like always,” I add and Alex laughs. Josh and his famous life plan.

Everyone, including Justin, was surprised to see Josh today. We all expected him not to turn up, but he did. And I’m sure we were all wondering what he had to sacrifice to see his daughter.

But I mainly found myself asking if he was wishing he were somewhere else, somewhere more important than with his child. I mean, with Josh you never know, anything that involves him caring is too much for his not so fragile heart.

Sara wasn’t too affected by Josh’s appearance; in fact she was quite pleased that her father cared within an inch of his nose for her.

But as far as Josh goes, his visit was more than two weeks ago and we still haven’t heard from him. Actually we were expecting him to call two days after, when Alex and I refused to call him. I mean what did you expect? He gave me a business card for God’s sake!

But alas, thank God, he hasn’t called, and I have a sneaky suspicion that he ‘conveniently’ forgot, AGAIN. Yet, this hasn’t bothered me much because Sara is happy and frankly that’s all I care about right now.

And just as I’ve put Sara to bed, Josh and his unpredictable timing show up – in the form of a phone call.

“When will I see my daughter again?” he asks without even a hello.

“Oh, I’m surprised you even remembered you had a daughter,” I reply with the same tone of rudeness, and he grunts.

“I always remember her, it’s her mother I try and forget,” he replies coldly and it takes me by surprise. I wonder what brought on this hostility. What happened to the Josh charm?

“Well same here,” I reply, “But in my case it’s her father but he seems to have the ability to pop up when he’s not wanted.”

“Sorry to be such a hassle,” he hisses with a grunt, “but Sara is my child too you know.” I almost laugh at that.

“Is that you think a ten thousand dollar check is? A father?” I ask with a haughty laugh and he growls.

“No,” he says angrily, “A father is me, not Alex.” I sigh, because I don’t know why Josh does that. He knows very well that I hate people talking like that about Alex especially if he’s not there to defend himself.

“Don’t bring Alex into this,” I hiss, trying not to yell.

“Why not? He thinks he’s Sara’s father and seems to forget I exist,” Josh replies and I laugh.

“And he has a right to,” I reply, “He’s around more than you ever are.”

“That’s not my fault,” Josh says, “If you just let me…”

“I do Josh,” I say cutting-in because I can’t stand hear him bullshit. “But you chose not to be here. So don’t blame me, blame yourself.”

The fact that Josh thinks he has the right to  be a father, when he hasn’t been there from the beginning of his child’s life, or the fact that he thinks I owe him to see Sara pisses me off to no end.

He turns up after five years of no existence in her life and expects me, and everyone else around Sara to drop everything so he can be a good father? At his own convenience no less, no one else’s. That’s what bugs me about Josh; he thinks I owe him something because I ruined his life. I mean why does he want anything to do with his daughter anyways? I thought she was a life ruiner. Josh believes that everyone owes him the air we breathe, because he needs it.

I mean, I wouldn’t mind if he was actually there for the past five years, but he hasn’t been has he? No, he’s been doing God knows what and forgetting he has a child.

I don’t even know if what he’s done in the past five years is legally viable. For all I know he could be robbing banks. But Josh wouldn’t need that, I think he’s probably been sleeping with God knows what and produced I don’t know how many off-spring. All the while having everyone of those girls think they ruined his life.

I’m sure he hasn’t told them that the first woman who ruined his life he promised to be there for but isn’t.