You see, I'm Justin Timberlake. You must be going 'oooh, wow, what's so special about that?' It's just a name, right? Well, WRONG. It's more what I consider symbolic of someone that is put out into the public as the idea of me. Do you see what I'm getting at here? My name has things attached to it that aren't completely true about the real guy you are reading about here. I'm a successful music icon and part of a successful musical group, but all that other stuff I read or hear from the media? Nope. Ummm, not really me. I'm just a normal guy really. I don't even know what to classify as normal anymore actually. That's sad, huh? Well, I eat, go out, have likes, dislikes, a job, family, friends, etc like everyone else... That's normal, right? Then there's the 'Justin Timberlake' I mentioned first. He's arrogant, cocky, overconfident, a partier, a flirt, a dancaholic, a player, and is currently dating and in love with pop superstar Britney Spears. Nothing but misconceptions I tell you. Damn stupid press.

Ok, I admit I get arrogant every once in a while, but I don't think I'm cocky about it and it's usually in a joking manner. I'm not constantly singing my praises and flaunting my shit. I know I'm a confident individual, but everyone still has their doubts and hidden fears; I just don't express them to the public. That kinda thing is private and for people strictly in my personal life. I like to go out to clubs and dance and have fun yes, but I don't get shitfaced every damn night, and I sure as hell don't dance every freakin' minute that I'm in a club. I like to sit in the backrooms and mingle and dance with the people, etc... I even like to stay in every once in a while and just get away from all that, you know, the quote unquote 'night life.' Home is where my heart is a lot of the time because I never get a break usually. I'm always on the go. Home is like my vacation spot if that makes any sense at all. I do like to flirt, and I like to think that I'm funny, but I also don't know if the attention I'm getting back from a girl is because I'm THE Justin Timberlake or because I'm just regular old funny and flirty Justin. I seriously don't know anymore.

The last misconception is the one I find to be the most amusing. I love how people can classify me as a player and then say I'm in love in the next sentence. Seriously, what is up with that shit? First off, no, I am not a player and never will be. I was brought up in a southern home, and I learned incredibly fast that women are to be treated respectfully. That's that. No questions about it. My momma raised me well. I also would classify myself as a romantic at heart. Where does that leave room for disrespecting women? Come on, show me because I would really like to see how that makes me 'use' women...

And ahhhhh, the whole girlfriend issue. I love how the media blows it up bigger than it really is. Love? With Brit? No, can't say that I've ever said those three words to her. She's never said them to me either. Yes, we are currently dating. I would call her my girlfriend. Yes, we go out and have fun. We dance, we go out to eat, we kiss. Does that really make us in love? Nope. Not really. Brit has - how do I put this? Well, she's changed a little since she started in the music business. I can't say she's the same sweet girl I met when I was younger. I think she's beautiful and can be really sweet, yet I know a different side of her too. This different side is not what I would want in a girlfriend. It's rather annoying, and it even pisses me off sometimes. She's become a tad materialistic, bossy, etc. I don't think I need to go on. But yeah, I know I would never love her in that way. I can respect her as a person yes, but love her in that way? Let's just say it isn't likely. I was actually going to end our so called relationship pretty soon, and to be honest, I can't say either of us would be crushed. It definitely wasn't as serious as the press have made it out to be.

So that clears up the rumor mill, right? So what about the real me? What am I like? Sometimes I don't know anymore. I'm kinda quiet, thoughtful. I write songs. I play piano and guitar. I like to be funny. Being too serious would be wasting the time you have here on Earth, don't you think? You'd miss so many things. I'm a nintendo junkie when I get the chance. I whomp Chris' ass all the time. Chris is one of my bandmates by the way...

My band, *NSYNC. Well, some people call it a band, a 'boyband.' I hate that fucking terminology. We are a vocal harmony group. Get it right already people!! We sing five part harmonies and happen to dance too. Big deal. Boyband this. See my finger? The middle one? That came out a little angry, huh? Well, those four guys are like my second family. I just hate seeing all our hard work being reduced to what that word envisions. I see puppets, and I am no damn puppet. I don't 'play the game and ride the fame,' and neither do my friends. Hey, that rhymed. Cool.

We've sold so many albums, made so many videos, won so many awards, and I still don't see us getting any respect. That's what I'm hoping this record will do. We just finished our new album, 'Celebrity.' It pokes fun at every aspect of that word. We made sure of that. It was a great experience to be a part of. Hopefully, our point will get across and people will start to see us as the talented musicians we are rather than just five white boys who happen to sing and dance.

So yeah, that's me. Mr. JT. It ain't all its cracked up to be, is it? I can't say that all I want to do is complain about my life. I do have it really good. I just wish I didn't have to give up being me in the process. When I joined *NSYNC, I didn't want to have to become someone I'm not. A lot of the time, I feel like I have to do that. Well, sometimes. When I mentioned bad decisions in the beginning? Take Brit for example. I shouldn't have let our relationship get so far with the public. Now, when I end it with her, it's going to be huge news and the public will be expecting devastation on both ends, hers and mine. I know I'm not gonna be that way and neither is she, but we may have to play that role for a month or so which is something I don't understand or like. Another bad decision? Well, I can't say I'm happy that I have all of these rumors flying around about me being a player. However, it probably is my fault. Maybe it's because my relationship isn't really a relationship and I find it more than OK to dance and grind with other women? It's not a big deal to either of us. I've seen Brit dance and grind with other guys, and the press aren't hounding her about cheating on me now, are they? Whatever. I don't really care about it anymore.

Things just don't make any sense. I wish I could reintroduce myself to the world, just one big reinvention. They would finally see me for me, and not just the name. I could be myself, say what I wanna say, be with who I wanna be with and not with who people are expecting me to be with, and let go of all the lies and misconceptions surrounding me. Meeting someone who did the same would be even better. Yeah, I knew Brit when I was younger and before our careers sky-rocketed, but she's changed. She doesn't see me as that little boy who grew up like I see her as that little girl who grew up. She sees the name I think. That saddens me because she was at one time a rather good friend who was real. I want someone real. Too bad it's not easy to find, right?

I know what you're thinking. What the hell am I whining for? I'm in a place millions would kill to be in. Please don't look at it like that. I know I may sound repetitive, but I'm completely happy with my family, my career, and most of the people in my life. It's just that I'm not happy with the person I'm portrayed as. There's a huge difference. I'm in no way ungrateful. I feel truly blessed to do what I do every day and be in the place that I'm in and be around the people I am. I just wish I could enjoy it knowing that I didn't feel the need to change myself.

It's been probably an hour while I've been sitting here in the airport lobby writing in this notebook. We're flying to NYC today for promotions, publicity, practicing, and performing, better known as the four p's of our lives after completing an album. We released our first single already, and now it's time to perform it and promote it to the public so the album sells well when it comes out. Then, we're hitting the road for our summer tour which means we'll have to continue practicing and performing. We're actually taking a huge risk by going on tour before our album is released. However, risks are what it's all about. Being different can also a good thing because then people notice that you're being different.

I'm more than excited to be going back to New York, but at the same time, I'm not. Britney's going to be there for a bit, which means I'm going to have to end our 'relationship' while she's there because I would like to be proper and do it in person. Then, there's going to be the vast amounts of work involved for everything we got going on. But without work, there are no rewards, right? At least we do get a few days off to enjoy the city before our lives take off again. Oh, shit. That's our flight number being called to board. Finally. Wish me luck in the big apple. I may need it.