"Hey Lieutenant, how are you?"
"Uh, good good." His response didn't sound too good, neither did his stance. Everyone in the brigade noticed the dilemma he was fighting to keep inside. He was a man a few words, that was a given but whatever was on his mind had to have been eating him up on the inside. Out of all the men that were there fighting for the war on terrorism only one person could talk to him and that was his fellow comrade Lt. Chasez. Both went through basic training at Fort Brag almost instantly created a friendship that no one else could penetrate. But even in his friendship, his friend remained very private. Privacy be damned, he was going to see what was bothering him at a time where he should've been celebrating.
"You don't seem too good."
"Well I am" he snapped.
"Come on Justin....we've know each other for five years now. This is a time where you should be thrilled, you're going home! Do you know how many people here want to go home to their families? And you're leaving out tomorrow yet you have this scowl on your face man, what gives?"
"You wouldn't understand Lt."
"Its Josh dude. We're not talking as co-workers, we're talking as friends and I want to know what's going on." Justin let out a sigh, this would be the first time that he'd exposed himself to anyone. He didn't like talking much about his personal life but at the moment he needed someone, anyone and J.C. as many of the guys liked to call him was the only person that was willing to find out what was wrong.
"Its about me going home to my wife."
"Andrea?" he questioned. "Going back to a wife like that, yow! Doesn't sound like a bad thing."
"Not when you're in love, which we're not.... at least I don‘t think so."
"Explain...."
Andrea finally sat down after a long day hospital. She wasn't just physically tired but mentally tired as well. It seemed as if it was a never ending flow of people coming in and out of the hospital with life threatening injuries that day but she got what she asked for when she decided to go become a nurse. Despite the brown bags that obvious stood out on her soft caramel skin she wouldn't change anything for the world, well professional wise. There were other things she wish she could change about her life. That would be her absent husband Justin. It was funny to think about him at the moment because it was her job that brought them together. But it was his job that slowly but surely pulled them apart.
It's gonna burn for me to say this
But it's comin from my heart
It's been a long time coming
But we done been fell apart
Really wanna work this out
But I don't think ya gonna change ya
I do but you don't
Think it's best we go our separate ways
Tell me why I should stay in this relationship
When I'm hurting baby, I ain't happy baby
Plus there’s so many other things I gotta deal with
I think that you should let it burn
Andrea knew what she was getting into going into the field of nursing but never had she known what she was getting into marrying an Army man. His army status was what made her fall head over heels for him the in the first place. His muscular build, his promptness, his ability to appreciate even the little things in life drew her like a moth to the flame. She knew that he was the one for her just from the first date. He knew as well, spending almost every waking hour he possibly could with her. Now? Now was another story.
Justin looked at his watch one more time, which read 1:35. He knew that she was probably wondering where he was. Once again he had lied to her. Andrea believed that he was in the office, in fact he was in another's bed. Justin's job as an army finance analyst brought many responsibilities he never knew would come along with the job. Knowing Andrea for only 4 months, he knew that she was the woman for him but still she hadn't grasped the concept that this was his job, constantly arguing with him that she never saw him. Unfortunately the frustration of her not grasping the life of an army man's wife brought him to her. That wasn't really a good excuse but it was the excuse he used to make himself believe that everything he was doing was purposeful. That she only understood the stresses of his life. Justin pulled away from her and grabbed his clothes.
"Where are you going?" she asked, pulling the sheet up her bare body.
"Home."
Sendin' pages I ain't supposed to
Got somebody here but I want you
Cause the feelin ain't the same find myself
Callin' her your name
Ladies tell me do you understand?
Now all my fellas do you feel my pain?
It's the way I feel
I know I made a mistake
Now it's too late
I know she ain't comin back
What I gotta do now
To get my shorty back
Ooo ooo ooo ooooh
Man I don't know what I'm gonna do
Without my booo
You've been gone for too long
It's been fifty-eleven days, um-teen hours
Imma be burnin' till you return (let it burn)
Justin walked into the darkened home knowing that Andrea had long went to bed before he came in. He walked into the bedroom watching her sleep soundly. This was something she definitely didn't deserve.
That morning he knew what he was going to do. He was going to be upfront with her about his infidelity. Tell her the feelings that he felt deep within, that maybe the feeling he thought he felt may have been wrong. That maybe they weren't made for each other. Justin made sure she was fully awaken before delivering the news.
"Andrea we have to talk" he spoke.
"What is it?" Justin took Andrea's hands in his, looking into her brown eyes. It was going to be hard but it had to be done.
"Andre--" the doorbell broke confession. "Hold on a second." Justin got up from the table to the front door where Sgt. Monroe stood. "Sgt. Monroe" he saluted.
"Lt."
"What is the meaning of this visit sir?"
"I have come to announce that you are to be deployed to Iraq in 24 hours."
~*~
"I'm sorry to hear that man" J.C. said patting his back. He never knew that before he was sent over this was what was going on in his life. It had to have been hard to not only be falling out of love with your wife, but cheating on her as well. He couldn't even tell how he felt to his wife due to the news of his deployment. Instead he talked over the news to his wife who was shaken. Men where dying over there everyday seemed like. Her worry halted his decision in telling her the truth. “So what are you going to do when you get home?”
“What I should’ve done before I left….
When your feeling ain't the same and your body don't want to
But you know gotta let it go cuz the party ain't jumpin' like it used to
Even though this might bruise you
Let it burn (let it burn, let it burn, you gon'learn)
Let it burn (gotta let it burn)
Gotta let it burn
Deep down you know its best for you except but you
Hate the thought of her being with someone else
But you know that it's over
you know that it was through
Let it burn
Let it burn
Gotta let it burn
Andrea put the finishing touches on the bedroom. Though they were hitting some rough patches when he was last there a year ago, she was still hopeful that their marriage could be salvaged. She got a second chance in their marriage when not only she learned Justin was alive but he was coming back home much sooner than a lot of the men that went there. Andrea was going to do anything she could to make the relationship work, starting tonight with a candle light dinner and making love to him for the first time in a year. Putting the last candle in the holder she stopped when she heard the doorbell.
“He probably lost his keys or something” she laughed to herself. She basically skipped down the steps to the front door. Unfortunately it was another person, a woman. “Um…may I help you?”
“Is this Justin Timberlake’s residence?” Andrea was a little confused, who was this?
“Uh…yes it is and you are?”
“Lt. Diaz ma’am, are you the help?” What did she just say? Immediately she caught an attitude towards the leggy blonde. Hands on hips and fury in eyes, Andrea looked at her like she had three purple heads.
“Excuse me? I’m not the help, I’m his wife!”
“Wife? I’m his girlfriend!”
“Girl you are hilarious because I could’ve just swore I heard you say you was his girlfriend” she laughed.
“I’m not joking bitch, I am his girlfriend. Wait! I do know you, you’re Andrea.”
“You don’t fucking know me!”
“Of course I do, I actually do remember him telling me that he had a wife. A wife that couldn’t understand where he was coming from, a wife that was annoying the shit out of him. Oh yeah that same wife he totally cheated on” she smiled. She could see the hurt in the young woman’s eyes. Andrea didn’t want to believe it but there was a feeling deep down in the pit of her stomach that let her know that trick standing before her was indeed someone Justin was cheating on her with. No man would be in the office that much. She had deluded herself into believing that he was working but she always felt it was more. And today standing before her was the proof. Not wanting to hear more she slammed the door in her face and headed upstairs to their beautifully decorated room. All this time and hope of salvaging the slowly but surely doomed relationship was out the window. The numerous times she believed he was at work or the nights she slept alone were over. If he wanted the bitch that stood before her so bad then he could have her. Andrea looked at the picture that sat on the drawer of their dresser with tears in her eyes. Justin was the man she believed was her soul mate, but that was all a lie.
I'm twisted cuz one side of me is tellin' me that I need to move on
On the other side I wanna break down and cry
I'm twisted cuz one side of me is tellin' me that I need to move on
On the other side I wanna break down and cry
The whole cab ride there Justin knew what he had to do. He had been contemplating it every since he was on the plane as well. He was going to break things off with Cameron. The whole time he was away he tried to convince himself that he didn’t love Andrea anymore so it’d be easier to divorce but who was he kidding. He was still in love with that goofy girl that seemed to make the dark clouds above him go away with just a simple smile. No more lies, just the truth, Justin was ready to not only put it out there but get some professional help as well. Dialing the digits to what seemed like a reputable psychologist out of the yellow pages he made an appointment for the following day. Things were going to be made right if he could help it. Finally the cabbie pulled up the brick style home he was happy to see. After paying the fee he walked up the path with a smile on his face. It felt fantastic to be in the good US of A and it felt fantastic to know that he was going to work on making things right with his wife.
“Drea!! I’m home!!” he called out but he didn’t gather a response. “Drea?? You here?” Justin sat his bags down continuously calling for his wife. “Andrea?” he called once more, nothing. Did she have to over stay at work? Or was she out running errands? Justin walked around the house looking for her. He didn’t see her downstairs, so he figured she was upstairs sleeping. “Andrea?” Justin walked into the bedroom only to find their wedding picture shattered upon the ground. What happened there? Justin grabbed the phone to call her cell only to get her voice mail. Nervousness built up inside, had she been hurt? Consumed with the fact that something bad had happened to her and not that she left voluntarily, Justin began calling everyone he could think of. Her job, friends, family, anyone that had any info on where she was. Just as he was about to call her phone once more, a white folded up piece of paper laid on the kitchen table. Carefully he unfolded it reading four simple words that made his heart sink to the floor.
“I want a divorce.”
So many days, so many hours
I'm still burnin' till you return
When your feeling ain't the same and your body don't want to
But you know gotta let it go cuz the party ain't jumpin' like it used to
Even though this might bruise you
Let it burn
Let it burn
Gotta let it burn
Deep down you know it's best for you except but you
Hate the thought of her being with someone else
But you know that it's over
You know that it was through
Let it burn
Let it burn
Gotta let it burn
She had to have found out, she had to have found out about Cameron. Tears began to well up. Yes he had cheated on her and yes he had been wrong to her but he was back to make things right. He was back to fix their marriage and now she was gone? This couldn’t be happening, this just could not be happening! Justin tried with all his might to hold in the sob that ached to escape his lips. He no longer fought it, letting the sounds of his cries he withheld echo through the house. His wife left him, she was gone. Now what was he going to do without her?
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