Chapter 27          

   Justin watched helplessly from the doorway as Rosa began packing all her belongings, Maddy’s already all packed up. They had been back in America for three days now and Rosa had done what she said she was going to do. Move out.        

     The day they arrived she began searching for an apartment and she had already found one. Yesterday she had packed everything that belonged to Maddy and today it was all of hers. He had argued with her, he tried to stop her but nothing worked. She didn’t argue back, she didn’t do anything in return. She would just look up at him, her expression full of pain, and he couldn’t dare stand in her way. Something about all of this was wrong; he just wasn’t sure what it was. But it had made Rosa dead inside.     

        Her room was nearly all packed up, she just had to pack her shoes and then any other things she had place in the house to make it feel more like home.        

     “Rosa…” He whispered pleading, hoping she would talk to him. It was killing him that she was acting like this. He wanted to see her smile, hear her laugh, watch her eyes sparkle. He wanted Rosa back, he wanted her to stay, he wanted to start a relationship with her. He didn’t understand why she would leave. She knew he had feeling for her and he adored Maddy, he didn’t see what the problem was.          

   She paused for a moment and looked up at him. She read the expression on his face and she knew he was going to try and convince her to stay. She immediately went back to packing her things.   

          “Why?” She didn’t say anything. The only reason he had heard is what she had told Maddy. That they didn’t fit into his life, he was very busy and they couldn’t stay any longer, that they had to get their own home and their life back. He didn’t understand any of it.        

     “Would you just answer the one question? Don’t I deserve at least that Rosa?” He asked firmly, crossing his arms over his chest. She stood up and walked over to the door, waiting for him to get out of her way.      

       “Let me pass please.”        

     “No.” She glared at him. “You haven’t done anything I’ve asked since we got back, why should I do what you want?” He knew it was immature but he needed a reaction from her.      

       “You know what when I came to America, I had a loving family, a home, then I got a husband, and a daughter and then there was you. Now years later, I no longer have a loving family, or a husband or a home for Christ’s sakes. All I have and all I’ve really ever had was my daughter.”        

     “You have me.” He cut in, loosening his position on the door.        

     “No Justin I don’t. I never had you to begin with, I never can have you and I never will have you and that is why I have to leave. Now let me pass.” He thought about her words as she slipped by him.      

       What was she talking about? She had him, she did. Why couldn’t she ever have him? He wanted her and she wanted him, what was so complicated about it? What didn’t she understand? He wanted to be with her and now she was treating him like a stranger. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  

          Maddy helped Justin wash the dishes after dinner, she had volunteered. Rosa knew it was because she wanted to spend as much time with Justin before they left tomorrow morning. Justin had gladly accepted, using extra soap because Maddy loved the bubbles. They had a little bubble fight before Rosa had walked by and the immediately had stopped.      

       It was nearly 3 hours later and Justin had just finished reading Maddy a book, as he had spent the last three hours playing with her.      

       “Justin?” She asked, as he pulled the covers to her chin.       

      “Ya sweetie?”     

        “Why do we have to leave?” She asked sweetly, not understanding what was happening. But he was just as clueless as her.           

  “Well Maddy, you have too. You have to have your own house.”   

          “Isn’t this our new house?”          

   “This was a part time house sweetie. Your mom got you a new house.”         

    “Did you talk to mommy and ask her if we can stay?”           

  “Maddy, I don’t want you to go but you have to be with your mommy. But you can come over whenever you want; I’ll come and get you anytime.”   

          “But Justin I don’t want to leave. Aren’t you my new daddy?” Justin’s eyes filled with tears. How much longer could he dodge the truth, when she was so sweet and innocent? She just wasn’t old enough to understand the situation.       

      “No Maddy I’m not but…I wish I was. You’re a great girl Maddy. And whoever your new daddy becomes, he’s going to love you and treat you amazing because you are perfect.”     

        “But I don’t want a new daddy Juju. I want you to be my new daddy. I love you Juju.” Justin closed his eyes to keep in the tears, and glanced at the door when he heard shuffling. Rosa was standing there with tears running down her cheeks. She looked at him once and turned away.       

      “I love you too Maddy. You should go to sleep sweetie.” He turned off the light and stood up.   

          “No.” She screeched.     

        “Maddy, go to sleep.”         

    “Stay here.” She pulled her covers back. “Please Justin, mommy always sleeps with me.”    

         “Okay Maddy.” He got into the bed slowly, kissing her forehead before covering the both of them.         

    “Love you daddy.” She whispered before falling asleep. He heard a loud muffled sob. His first instinct was to go to Rosa but Maddy had just fallen asleep, she’d wake up in a second. She must have been sitting right outside the bedroom, she was trying to be quiet, he could tell. Her sobs were definitely being muffled.      

       He could just picture her outside the room, hunched against the wall, crying into her hands. Her small frame shaking with sobs. If she was in as much pain as he was then why would she want to leave? He didn’t even think she wanted to stay friends after this. He was making Maddy all these promises not knowing if he could keep any of them.    

         It seemed like an eternity later but he was finally able to sleep out of the bed without Maddy waking up. He hadn’t heard Rosa in a while and figured she must have quietly gone to bed. The last night she would ever spend in his house. Their house. It was their house. He never wanted her to leave. He had never been happier in his life, than the time they had spent here with him. He had thought performing made him the happiest but maybe it was this. Maybe being a father would make him happier. Maybe having a family would make him happier.      

        He could do both…be a family man and a businessman. He had been successful enough in music. He could write and produce for other artists. Or concentrate on films for a while. He loved Maddy…hell maybe he even loved Rosa. But he couldn’t tell her that. It was too soon and she had gone through too much. She didn’t just want to jump into a whole new serious relationship. They were already living together, Maddy was practically calling him daddy, it was as if they were married and he knew Rosa didn’t want that.        

     She needed to heal and that’s why he couldn’t rush her. He couldn’t tell her he loved her. At least not yet…maybe not ever the way things were going.    

         As he walked into the hallway, he saw Rosa’s sagged figure against the wall. He watched her, listening to her light breathing before he bent over and gently scooped her into his arms. She stirred slightly but she didn’t wake up. He wasn’t sure if he wanted her too. He didn’t want her to jump out of his arms but they would be able to talk is she woke up. Slowly she opened her eyes, he glanced down at her. 

“Justin?” 

“Shh, Rosa I’m just bringing you to bed. You fell asleep in the hallway.”

 “Maddy called you daddy.” She said softly as he placed her in the center of her bed. 

“She’s confused.” He whispered, running his hand over her forehead, through her hair. He was memorizing ever detail of her right now, especially the small dimple in her right cheek that he was definitely going to miss.

“Just go to sleep Rosa, this is no time to talk.” She was half asleep and he could hardly make out all her mumblings. 

“I’m…confused.” She mumbled, before turning her head to the side and drifting to sleep.