~*Petals*~
I’ve often wonder if there’s ever been a perfect family
I always longed for undivided ness and sought stability
A flower taught me how to pray
But as I grew that flower changed
She started flailing in the wind
Like golden petals scattering
Justin looked down at the picture of her in shock. This was the woman he was so in love with. The woman he planned to marry after she got back. The woman he planned to live the rest of his life with and she was dead. He had been suppressing the tears for a week now. He didn’t want to seem too soft but he couldn’t help but think about her. Her beautiful smile, her tears, her soul. She was the woman he wanted to see everyday when he awaked. He wanted her to be the mother of his children. She had left with them on bad terms. A nasty fight that they never got to make up for. He never got to say he was sorry. He never got to kiss her soft lips and see her smile. Instead his last memories of her were of her crying as she walked out that door early on August 24th.
And I miss you dandelion and even love you
And I wish there was a way for me to trust you
But it hurts me every time I try to touch you
But I miss you dandelion and even love you
How did they meet? It was pretty simple. They walked into a photo shoot years before. Smiling, she looked at him and introduced herself. He knew who she was. Who didn’t? A girl with that pretty of a face you didn’t forget. She was so friendly. He really got to talk to her and got to see a more hyperactive side of her. He liked when she was hyper because it really gave off the impression that she knew how to have fun. How to step outside of her protectiveness to just be her for one night.
I gravitated towards a patriarch so young predictably
I was resigned to spend my life within a maze of misery
A boy and girl befriended me
We bonded through despondency
I stayed so long that finally
I fled to save my sanity
Things became different later that year when they saw more and more of each other. They kept their friendship on the side of their busy careers. She was doing so much, she was singing, acting, modeling. She had so much promise. They would meet with each other every time they were in town at the same time. They would go see a movie or go out to dinner, anything that didn’t make them stick out too much. She was a pretty private person; very much happy with nobody knowing what was going on in her life. When asked about her personal life she would laugh and just brush it off with a comment like, “Nothing really happening...” Sure nothing was happening. Only me and her knew what was going down behind closed doors. I knew her from the inside out and she knew me like the back of her hand. We were inseparable by the end of the year.
And I miss you little sis and little brother
And I hope you realize I’ll always love you
And although you’re struggling you will recover
And I miss you little sis and little brother
She often gave me many lectures. A very powerful, rich, intelligent, African-American woman she was. She knew how things worked. She had been brought up by a phenomenal family. One family that knew that her future was bright and promising; a loving family. It’s sad to see that there aren’t as many self earned wealthy young African American women, and when you do find one such as her, you find out that their lives were cut short by some tragic incident. Lisa for instance had so much to give back to the world, a hard working woman who cared for others and we lost her in a tragic accident. She knew that she had secure her own financial future because nobody else would do that for her. The dedication she showed in her eyes every time she took on a task inspired him to get involved in things that mattered. She showed him that sometimes, it wasn’t always about you, sometimes, there are people worse off than you are.
So many I considered closest to me
Turned on a dime and sold me out diffusively
Although that knife is chipping away at me
They turned their eyes away and went home to sleep
She laughed as she walked down the empty beach with him. Her smile so bright that it didn’t matter how dark it was, they could see for miles. Her long hair flowing behind her back as the wind blew towards them as they walked. He really loved their late night walks on the beach. They learned a lot from each other doing so. They would talk about everything from music to movies to fashion to just them. He always found himself amazed that she didn’t care about what others thought. That she felt like he was a major part of her life. That she loved him for him and nobody else. She seemed to understand him. She took the time to get to know him and nobody had even dared tried that before. Mostly because for some reason they either found him intimidating or they just wouldn’t give him a chance. He looked down at the picture, releasing the tears that had haunted him for so long. He needed her. He breathed her. It was official August 25th, 2001 was the day that his entire will to live had died.
And I’ve missed a lot of life but I’ll recover
Though I know you like to see me suffer
And I wish that you and I would forgive each other
Cuz I miss you valentine
And Really Loved You
I use to love you
I tried so hard
But I ran away
To preserve my sanity
To get up the strength to break away
Fly....
“I Love and miss you Aaliyah...I’ll see you later...I promise you that.” Justin sat the white rose next to the picture of her and walked away. Knowing he would never be able to recover. Knowing that he would never be able to live down the guilt of her leaving. Knowing that he could have prevented this. He turned away from the flower for a second and turned back; finding a ghost of the one he loved, her eyes wide and her smile so faint. Her long black hair hanging over her shoulders of her white gown. He went to touch her but the only response he got from her were petals scattered across the floor spelling three words. I Love You.
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