New Year’s Eve – 2005 –11:00 P.M.
JC flopped into the worn leather chair in the family room of his restored 1930's Florida home. Settling down, he pulled his legs up under him into a cross-legged position, then sighed as he ran his hands through his hair. Laying his head back on the chair he closed his eyes. A smile graced his lips as he thought about what a "glamorous celebrity" life he led. Opening his eyes slowly, he looked over at the sofa where they came to rest on his lovely wife of almost six years - Annie. She was curled up with Chiang, their Siamese. The cat cracked open an eye and fixed him with that scornful look cats have perfected. He seemed to be saying, "What, I'm sleeping here! Bug off!"
Just then the baby Annie was carrying kicked and connected with Chiang who leapt up and arched into the classic Halloween cat stance. Clearly miffed, and more than slightly pissed, he jumped down off to remove his illustrious presence from the sight of the commoners. Passing by Beau, he paused just long enough to reacquaint the dog's nose with his paw in a classic case of transference.
The golden retriever looked at JC as if to say, "Yeah, I know. He's a pain...but I have a nobler calling." Closing his eyes, he sighed as the sleeping twins shifted their weight to get more comfortable. "I'm the twins' pillow." Stifling a laugh, JC reached over and picked up the leather bound journal Annie had given him for Christmas and ran his finger over the embossed lettering which read "Joshua's Reflections - 2006". Picking up his pen, he opened the book and placing pen to paper dated the first
page...
12/31/05
Dear Dog, (As a little boy of six he had written in his very first journal a
letter to God, transposing the name. It was a tradition that he'd kept up for the past 23 years.)
Well, the sync part of *Nsync are still together, but not getting along too
well with the *N part. Ever since CFTC VI things have been not been good between us. The fans place the blame on Justin and his ego, and I suppose that's true to some extent. It's funny...early on Lance had read some postings on various message boards. Many had talked about karma and it coming back to bite Justin in the ass. Well, in a strange and prophetic way, they were right. Since the "story" got out that he didn't want to record with us and wanted to concentrate on acting - (Odd...at the time, he'd only made one movie which hadn't even been released yet!) - his life has slowly spiraled downward. In fact, since Halloween he hasn't even taken any of our calls.
Annie says I should try and reach out to him what with it being the New Year and all. Maybe tomorrow? I don't know. We said some pretty hateful things to each other the last time we talked. I really feel bad about it now, but I was just so angry that I just let him have it.
Stopping, he tapped the pen on his thumb. Most of the events played themselves out quietly in his mind in vivid detail. After a few minutes he let out a deep sigh and resumed his writing.
You know, life had been sweet for the rest of us. Joey has become the "Toast of Broadway". He won a Tony for his portrayal of Will Rogers in a revival of "The Will Rogers Follies." Then "Rent" was finally made into a movie and he was able to reprise his Broadway role. He got fantastic reviews and was even nominated for an Oscar. Justin begrudgingly called and congratulated him. He had made no bones about the fact that he wanted the role, but it was Joey's from the beginning. Joey's comedy album was also a smash. There's talk that Weird Al wants to do a collaboration with him.
Oh and one more thing, he and Kelly are finally giving Brianna a sibling. She's due in June.
Lance finally had his dream of going into space realized. He was able to secure some backers that were more reliable to help fund his flying into space this past summer. His trip was documented and is now used as a recruiting tool by NASA for future astronauts. We all were so proud of him. He still serves on the advisory board to NASA and has helped with the SpaceShipOne space venture. His film production company has produced some Oscar winning films and he's much sought after. He and his talented wife Katarina are writing their first screenplay together; based on the first of her best selling Science Fiction books. Plus, they are expecting their first child in March.
Chris, the little elf, is doing well too. His rock group Little Red Monster produced some innovative music which has been extremely well received...getting great reviews. He and I toured together for most the last part of 2005, taking turns as the opening and closing acts. He won a Grammy for his debut album "Rock Monsters."
Annie and I were best man and matron of honor at his wedding in January 2005. Justin didn't show, even though he had been invited. Of course, the fact that Chris was marrying Justin's ex-wife was probably a fairly good reason for his no show. Not that they had been doing anything till Justin and Cassie's divorce was final. In fact, they didn't even realize their attraction to each other till then. Justin had been okay with their relationship in the beginning, when it was just a friendship. However, when things started getting more serious...well, he couldn't handle it. Lately, he's been going through women like a thirsty man in the desert. His carelessness has him paying child support but no relationship with either of the children he has fathered.
As for me, I am so blessed by the Lord I can hardly fathom it. Near the end of 2004, after the rather tepid reception of "Schizophrenic", Jive approached me about doing a second album. Since I had written over 30
songs for the first one, material was no problem. I have always maintained that I wouldn't change a thing about that album. It was a record that I wanted to make and contained music that was close to my heart. Sure it was experimental and probably it wasn't the best time to release it, but I've always felt that it was done to my standards and passions. I will always be proud of it. Actually, now that time has passed, sales have slowly increased and just last week it went double platinum.
My second CD was simply called "joshua". That's the one that I was promoting during Chris's and my tour. I was glad that the fans wanted to hear songs from the first CD, so I incorporated some into the tour. I was also privileged to win a Grammy for "joshua". That was quite a night for Chris and me. Everyone was there and we had a great time celebrating afterwards. Unfortunately, Justin chose to stay away. It was sad really since I’d made the effort after the Super Bowl fiasco to be there for him on his big night.
My little family is growing too. The twins Claudine and William will be four in April. While in February, Annie is due to deliver our third child. His name (yes we know it's a boy) will be James Roy (after Lance and my dad). This way, Claudine will still be the little princess and I will be, as Annie says, still wrapped around her little finger.
Justin! What can I say about Justin that hasn't already been written in every tabloid and gossip rag around the world? His life has steadily gotten worse and worse. It was like his balloon rose into the atmosphere too fast and then when it seemed like he couldn't falter, he hit the edge of the stratosphere and plummeted to earth. After CFTC VI, when the press covered it like "Justin and Cameron host a charity event" and the rest of us just happened to show up, things started turning sour. "Edison" opened to mixed reviews for his performance. Then his off again, on again, off again relationship with Cameron finally implode. We had seen it coming...but were powerless to stop it. He made another movie and it didn't do much better. Discouraged he went back to the studio and decided to try a different route, choosing "rock".
Well, that was a disaster. He got mostly luke warm and even some scathing reviews. It was painful to read, and even more painful to watch him perform his song at the MTV awards. He actually got some boos. By contrast, Chris and I were very well received that night. Justin avoided us the rest of the evening, even going so far as to snub us on camera.
Lately he has been canceling, missing, or showing up hours late for
performances. There have been rumors of substance abuse (possible drugs or alcohol...maybe both...we don't know for sure...) None of us has had any contact with him since Halloween, like I said earlier. I think I'll give his Mom a call in the morning and see if she can help us reconnect.
JC stopped. After stretching out his legs, he placed the journal on the coffee table and got up to make himself some tea. While the water was heating, he got out the noise-makers and confetti. He would be waking everyone up in a few minutes to celebrate the dropping of the ball. Walking back into the family room, he looked around and chuckled softly. "Lifestyle of the rich and famous?" he whispered quietly to himself, kneeling to pat Beau on the head. "Wouldn't trade it for the world..."
The Next Morning
JC dialed Lynn's number and waited for her to pick up, sipping at yet another cup of tea. It had been a while since he'd called Justin's Mom, but was still pretty sure things would go okay.
"Hello?" came the usual inquisitive voice on the other end.
"Hi, Lynn. It's JC."
The voice took on even more brightness than usual, but it also seemed a
strained cheerfulness. "Hi, sweetie! How have you been?"
"Really good. And you?"
"Can't complain. How's the family?"
"Annie's getting bigger by the day and the twins are growing like weeds. How's yours?"
This was the trigger that cut through the last residue of false happiness. "Let's just cut to the chase, shall we? You're calling not calling to see how me and my family are doing...you want to know about Justin, don't you?"
"Yes, I do," JC admitted quietly. "I feel a bit guilty. The last time we spoke, I really let him have it. I was so angry."
"I know," Lynn murmured reassuringly, "but don't blame yourself. Justin probably deserved what you said to him."
"I don't know..." JC paused. "Anyway, the reason I'm calling is...I'd like to talk to him. We need to clear the air, and I don't want things to continue like this. Do you know how I can reach him? I tried all of his old numbers and haven't gotten an answer."
"JC, you can't contact him right now." There was a slight hitch in Lynn's voice. "Justin's in Rehab. He checked himself in the day after Christmas. After watching the video his step-dad shot...well, he was so embarrassed by his behavior he left the next morning. He has about two more weeks of treatment before they're going to let him contact any of us."
"I'm so sorry, Lynn!" Somehow, JC felt even worse about Justin than he had before. "I knew things were bad, but I didn't realize..." He trailed off, at a loss for further words.
"JC, don't beat yourself up over this," Lynn answered pointedly. "We all ignored the obvious and let him get away with a lot of things he shouldn't have. Things we should have stopped so much sooner." She sighed. "Sometimes, the fame and money can go to your head..." A sardonic chuckle slipped out. "Even if you're the 'responsible parent.'"
"All the same-"
Lynn cut him off. "JC, stop right now!"
JC took a deep breath. "Lynn, please keep me informed and let me know
when I can talk to Justin, okay? I'll tell the guys...if that's all right with you."
"JC, I know that you wouldn't do anything to hurt Justin. You can tell the guys and you can tell Annie." A genuine smile sounded in Lynn's voice. "I know how close you two are...and how much she cares for Justin. I don't want you to keep secrets from her."
"Okay." JC looked at his watch and grimaced. "I'm sorry, I really have togo now. Otherwise, we're going to be late for Joey and Kelly's party." His voice became infinitely apologetic and sincere. "I love you. Give Justin all of our love and let him know we're praying for him. Not just to come back, but to get better."
"I will sweetie." Another smile in her voice. "And thank you. I love you too. And I can't possibly thank you enough for being the kind person you are. Bye."
"Bye."
Annie entered the kitchen as he was hanging up the phone. Walking over to him, she hugged him from behind. Turning, JC held her close has he stroked her hair.
He spoke first, breaking the comfortable silence. "Annie, I just talked to Lynn. Justin checked himself into a Rehab center. I guess things finally caught up with him." He sighed heavily. "I feel-"
Annie placed a finger on his lips, cutting him off. "Jace, you are not to blame. Justin's been headed there for a long time. Your fight with him was not the cause."
"I know, it's just that I wish...."
"He wouldn't have listened to any one of you, not matter how good or
logical your arguments were. He had to, unfortunately, fall to this depth
before he could get better. I mean, could we have done anything to stop
Jacques?"
She felt him stiffen at his old rival's name, but just for a moment. "You're right." JC smiled as he leaned his forehead against hers. "You know, you're starting to get as wise as Claude."
This cozy little scene was interrupted by Claudine and William running into the kitchen yelling. "Mommy? Daddy? When are we going to Unkie Joey and Aunt Kelly's? Unkie Chris said we could paaaarrrrttttyyyy!"
JC laughed as he picked up Claudine, throwing her over his shoulder as he winked at his wife. "Annie, I have mine. Get yours and we can go."
Annie just stood there and laughed. "Like I can do that! Unless, of course, you want to have your son born today rather then in six weeks."
William started jumping up and down. "I want my brother now! I want my brother now!"
Claudine stuck out her little tongue, grimacing. "I don't. Boys are yucky," she added matter-of-factly.
JC laughed as he placed her back down on the floor. "Just keep that
thought for another...oh, I don't know...30 years?"
Annie just rolled her eyes, chuckling softly.
JC took each of his children by the hand. "Hey guys, let's help Mom get things together so we can go. Okay?"
"Okay, Daddy!" they replied in unison.
After packing up the car, they headed over to Joey and Kelly's for a day of fun. JC decided he would deal with Justin and related issues another day.
Today belonged to his family.
